I Still Love You

Mistakes and Regrets

As expected, silence surrounded the two ex lovers who's still not used to being in a close proximity again. 

 

The rain is still pouring hard and Sana's other arm is already soaked in the rain. She's keeping a safe distance between her and Tzuyu and the medium-sized umbrella isn't helping at all. 

 

“Move closer to me.” Tzuyu suddenly said to the older but she was still looking ahead. 

 

“H-huh?” A flustered Sana asked, not knowing what to do. 

 

“You're left arm is already soaked in the rain. Move closer so that your whole body would be covered by the umbrella.” Tzuyu explained in her monotone, urging the latter to move closer. 

 

“Ahh..” Sana nodded yet didn't move even an inch closer to the younger. 

 

“If you're really into avoiding having contact with me that much then just take the umbrella. I'll be okay.” Tzuyu was about to hand over the umbrella to Sana but the older stopped her. 

 

“No, stop. You'll get soaked in the rain as well if you do that...” She hesitantly shifted closer to Tzuyu, their arms brushing against each other. 

 

Tzuyu didn't say anything and just kept her hold on the umbrella. Firmly holding it to prevent them from getting wet. 

 

“So.. how are you?” Tzuyu asked to initiate a conversation, surprising Sana. Tzuyu's the quiet type plus they're ex girlfriends so it was unexpected having Tzuyu start a conversation with her. 

 

“O-oh I'm fine.. I guess.” Sana replied as she flashed a smile to cover up the uncertainty in her answer. 

 

“Hmm.. That's great.” Tzuyu nodded her head, not knowing what else to say. 

 

“How about you?” she took a glance at Tzuyu before adding, “How's it going with Elkie?” Sana started playing with the hem of her shirt as she asked. 

 

Tzuyu kept quiet for a couple of minutes, before clearing , “We...” 

 

Sana looked at her, a bit expectant to what Tzuyu will say. There was still this hope in her that they'll be fine again even though she knows that Elkie would remain unbothered in Tzuyu's heart. 

 

“We're not together anymore.” 

 

Sana blinked her eyes a couple of times with this, she knew that she heard it right but chose to refuse to believe it, “Why? She's on another country? LDR?” she asked, unsure whether she really understood what Tzuyu meant. 

 

“No, we broke up.” Tzuyu bitterly chuckled, head suddenly hanging low.

 

“What? Why? When?” Sana couldn't help but to ask questions, she desperately needed some answers, this is about Chou Tzuyu after all. 

 

Tzuyu raised her head to look at Sana with her famous expressionless face, making Sana nervous as she doesn't know what goes on in the latter's head. 

 

“S-sorry, I didn't mean to meddle with your love life... I was just curious. I mean you guys seriously looked good together. When I saw you guys before, I could literally see love in the air.” Sana chuckled with bitterness. Tzuyu diverted her attention from Sana and looked straight ahead. 

 

Sana swear, she saw disappointment on Tzuyu's eyes or maybe it was just one of her imaginations. She seems to be imagining things because Tzuyu is beside her. 

 

Sana started to panic though, thinking that she had annoyed Tzuyu since the younger had this cold aura in her again so she started to blab “I didn't mean to annoy you with those questions. Sorry if I'm being annoying right now. But you know, it's really unbelievable that you and Elkie had already broken up. It was just like yesterday when I saw you smiling to each other. Who broke up with who? Wait sorry, don't mind that quest—” 

 

“She broke up with me.” Tzuyu finally talked, cutting Sana out of her trance. 

 

“Oh..” Sana wanted to ask more questions. She wants to know the reason why Elkie broke up with Tzuyu but just decided to keep mum, scared that the latter would react negatively. 

 

“Yeah, how about you? How's your relationship with uhm.. with whoever you're dating?” Tzuyu asked although with hesitation, still enough to change the focus of their conversation. 

 

“I'm not dating anyone.” Sana replied quite rather shyly, hoping that Tzuyu would believe her. 

 

“You're not? Wait, did you just broke up too? Or are you still not into a serious relationship yet. Oh sorry I didn't mean to sound ru—” Tzuyu didn't get to finish her sentence since Sana decided to cut her off. 

 

“I haven't dated nor see anyone for a year and a half now. I'm really not into dating again.” an unreadable expression was seen on Sana's face but Tzuyu could tell that she was telling the truth. 

 

“Why?” A very curious Tzuyu couldn't help but to ask, wanting answers. 

 

‘Because I still love you. I'm still waiting for you.’ it was about to slip out her tongue but fortunately she was quick enough to stop herself from saying it.

 

“I don't really know.” Sana just nervously chuckled, wishing that she at least sounded like she's telling the truth. 

 

They had come across the park. The place where they ended their relationship. And as if on cue, the rain started to pour much harder than earlier that their umbrella wasn't enough to handle it anymore. 

 

Luckily there was a shed at the park that's just near them so Tzuyu held Sana's hands and pulled her all the way there. 

 

“Let's just stop here for a while and wait until the rain stops.” Tzuyu glanced at Sana when she got no response and found out that Sana was slightly wet and shaking due to the cold mist of air that the rain had brought. 

 

Tzuyu automatically removed her jacket and placed it on Sana's shoulders, being the gentlewoman she is. 

 

“You should've worn something else." Tzuyu shook her head while looking at Sana's clothing, she's just wearing a thin white shirt. 

 

“I didn't have time to change into a better one since Momo dragged me out of my house. And you don't really need to lend me your jacket, you might be cold too. We both know that you get cold easily.” Sana was about to take Tzuyu's jacket off her shoulder but Tzuyu placed her hand above Sana's, completely stopping her. 

 

“No, wear it until you get home. You're basically shaking, you might catch a cold. My jacket will help you warm up. Besides, I still have my sweater on.” Tzuyu reasoned out then removed her hand from the older's. Making Sana miss the contact in an instant. 

 

Sana just nodded and pulled the jacket closer to her body, it was indeed warm and Tzuyu's lingering scent on it made it a whole lot better. 

 

“Hey... thank you.” Sana said as she glanced at Tzuyu, flashing a warm smile. 

 

“Hm? For what? The umbrella or the jacket?” Tzuyu softly chuckled, it was a music that Sana had missed so much. 

 

“For everything.” a giggle escaped Sana's lips but the sincerity in it was overflowing, making the latter smile. 

 

“Yeah, anytime. You're welcome tho.” Tzuyu's smile grew wider, her dimple showing. 

 

Seeing Tzuyu smile towards her felt nice. Oh how badly she wants to see that smile and that beautiful dimple of Tzuyu. 

 

It reminds Sana about the days where they were still dating, the happy moments that they had replayed on her mind but remembering the mistakes that she did to Tzuyu before, made her guilty. 

 

She felt like she doesn't deserve to have that smile being directed to her. 

 

“It still looks the same.” Sana said while looking around the same old park as if she doesn't go there every week. 

 

“What does?” Tzuyu asked, following Sana's gaze to see where she's looking. 

 

“The park... the memory of that night suddenly flashed in my head again. The rain made it seem more pitiful though.” Sana bitterly chuckled and Tzuyu could only look at her.

 

“Oh sorry to remind you about that night. I bet you've forgotten about it already. You just want to forget everything about me right? To erase those memories with pain in it.” Sana glanced at the younger and faked a smile but she failed since her face showed the pain that she's been feeling since Tzuyu left. 

 

“Sana, It's n—”

 

“It's okay Tzuyu. I understand that you hate me to the guts. I've hurt you so you have all the rights to hate me. You have the privilege to hurt me back. One and a half year without you isn't enough to match the pain that I've cost you. You should go back to Elkie. Or... or date someone! You can even take them to bed and give them hundreds of hickeys.” Sana looked up to try to stop her tears from falling but failed otherwise as the emotions was too much for her to handle any longer. 

 

“Do anything that'll make you happy. I want you to be happy. Because that's what you ing deserve. I know that you deserve happiness yet I hurt you instead, how ironic. Why am I so stupid? Why didn't I just show you love? Why did I have to hurt you? Why did I up? Wh—” Tzuyu pulled her into a hug, her hand caressing Sana's back comfortingly, stopping her from crying. 

 

“Hey that's enough. Stop crying, Sana. That already happened. I know that what you did is kind of unforgivable,” Tzuyu pulled back and placed her hands on Sana's shoulder before continuing “But hey, I forgive you okay? That was in the past and we're living in the present. The pain that your saying, I've healed from it already. I'm okay now.”

 

But I'm not. I'm not okay, Tzuyu. Since we broke up, I was never okay. Since you left, my life became so miserable. I-I don't know what to do.” Sana started crying harder as each words come out of . True to her words, she indeed looks lost. 

 

“I know that I don't deserve to be loved by you, heck I don't even deserve you at all! But.. but I can't help but sleep, hoping that you'll come back the moment I wake up. I can't stop myself from going to this ing park all the time even though it just reminds me of the day that I've lost you, because I always have this tiny hope that I'll see you here again, that you'll come back, that you'll love me again. Well you did come back but you were already with someone else that time, you already had Elkie. I thought that after seeing you that day, I'll be able to let you go but no. No matter what I do I still can't forget about you. I can't help but to look for you, wait for you. I can't stop myself from loving you.”

 

Sana seemed to ran out of breath and took her time to wipe her tears while Tzuyu was just looking at her with a shocked look on her face, eyes widened and lips slightly parted, still processing the shocking informations that her ex had admitted. 

 

Sana took a deep breath and composed herself, “I'm sorry Tzuyu. I really am. I'm sorry if I still love you. But don't worry, I won't bother you. I just really needed to let that out. You can continue living your life in peace. I.. I shall leave you alone now. Thank you for everything.” Sana gave Tzuyu one last smile before turning around, planning to go home even though the rain is still pouring hard. 

 

“So you're the one who's going to leave this time?” Tzuyu asked with her usual cold voice, making Sana halt on her step but she didn't reply to Tzuyu. 

 

“It's still raining, you should stay a little longer. Besides, you still have my jacket.” Sana was still preoccupied thinking about what she had said earlier, causing her to miss the playful tone that Tzuyu had used. 

 

Sana turned around and took the jacket off, “Oh sorry, here's your j—” Tzuyu's arms encircled her body, hugging her, causing Sana's brain to stop functioning for a while as she was so confused. 

 

“Stay. I forgave you for cheating on me but if you try to leave me now then I'll never forgive you even if you beg.” Tzuyu sternly said, sending shivers to Sana's whole body. 

 

“Why would you want me to stay? At this point, you should be mad at me. You should be pushing me away. You should be yelling at me. You should hate me.” Sana said so emotionless, still not hugging Tzuyu back. 

 

“Why would I do that?” Tzuyu asked, making Sana more confused than ever, wondering why the latter is being like this.

 

“Because I still love you. Because after all these time, it's still you meanwhile, you already like someone else. Because I'm still hoping that you feel the same way when I should be letting you go. Because I'm still waiting even though you're waiting for someone else. So why? Why are you telling me to stay instead of pushing me away?” Sana asked, now with a shaky voice, tears threatening to fall from her eyes, again. 

 

“Because the feeling is still mutual.” those words that casually slipped from Tzuyu's mouth made Sana so confuse and shocked and many more emotions was felt by her. 

 

“What do you mean?” she backed away to look at Tzuyu with curious eyes. 

 

“We're on the same boat. You said that you still love me right? Well... the feeling is mutual.” Tzuyu nervously chuckled before cupping Sana's face to wipe the older's tears with her thumb. 

 

“Wait... so you still love me? But what about Elkie? I thought you love her? You guys were happy together. And I hurted you! How could you still love me? Wait, were you just joking? Did you just say that since you pity me? ” Sana continued to ask those hundreds of questions that's filling her head. 

 

“Me and Elkie were in a real relationship but our parents just arranged us to be together. She did love me and I tried loving her back. I actually thought that I had already moved on from you but when we saw each other again that time, I just proved myself wrong. All the feelings that I tried to forget came back right after seeing you again. I spent months on pretending that I don't love you anymore but I just weren't able to hold it any longer so I told Elkie about it and she willingly let me go, she made some excuse to our parents so they eventually let me and Elkie go on separate ways." Tzuyu looked up then landed her gaze on Sana, checking what her reaction is but when she saw that she's just blankly staring at her, she decided to speak again. 

 

“I wanted to stay at Taiwan but Mina unnie kept insisting that I should come back. She kept telling me things about you, on how you've changed. The others kept me updated about you. And I found out that you were miserable so that's why I came back.” Tzuyu joked, earning a whine from Sana who felt lighter now compared to earlier. 

 

“But seriously, the feeling is still mutual.” a warm smile spread across Tzuyu's face as she stare at Sana. 

 

“Do you mind elaborating that?” Sana hesitantly asked, unknowingly biting her lips. 

 

“Elaborate what?” Tzuyu asked innocently, acting like she doesn't know what Sana's talking about. 

 

“On how the feeling is mutual. Can you... please elaborate that?” Sana said with those eyes staring at the latter eagerly. 

 

“Hmm, I'll just simplify it instead. Minatozaki Sana, I still love you.” Tzuyu grinned when Sana blushed hard, finding the latter really cute. 

 

After a couple of minutes, Sana managed to calm down for a bit. She cleared and looked at Tzuyu.

 

 “Chou Tzuyu, I still love you too.” Sana blushed even more, she was so red that she can be compared to a tomato. 

 

“If that's the case then, Minatozaki Sana, in the place where our story ended, can we change it into the place where we restarted? Can we continue our unfinished story?” Tzuyu got a hold of Sana's hand, holding tight like she'll lose her again the moment she let go. 

 

“You should've known the answer already base on the things that I said earlier. But to make it official, it'll always be a yes. Chou Tzuyu, let's start building this new chapter, together.” Sana managed to say as sweetly as she can even though she's a blushing mess. 

 

Sana's answer didn't fail to make Tzuyu smile so wide, feeling giddy, she decided to ask another question, “One more question. Can I kiss you?” 

 

Although it made her feel real warm inside, Sana couldn't help but to giggle at the younger's question. 

 

“You didn't need to ask.” she placed her cold lips on Tzuyu's warm ones, and they both melted in to the kiss, forgetting everything around them. It was just the two of them in that place, that's what they both had in mind. 

 

As if on cue, the rain slowly stopped and was later on replaced with the ray of the sun. It seems like the weather is going along with them. 

 

Well this is a sign of a new beginning.

 

 

 

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Chaelisa_lisarose #1
Chapter 5: SATZU is the real superior
CheejiKimbap
#2
Chapter 5: Superior saida still.
Adel22 #3
Chapter 6: Sweet ><
talkaboutstars #4
Chapter 4: sgdgxdbbff
somikims #5
Chapter 5: the name of their baby omg
DevilHuntress
#6
Chapter 6: Im goiiiing.
OnePotatoTwoPotato #7
Chapter 6: YOO AUTHOR thank you for this beautiful af story, kinikilig ako sobra Hahhahahahaha hopefully ill be going to Twicelights Manila ヽ(^。^)ノ See u there fellow ph-onces~! WeLoveYouSana~!!
elevenraye
#8
Chapter 6: See you
2ezfortzuyu_
#9
Chapter 6: see you there xD
MinatozakiSN_143
#10
Chapter 6: I'm going too ^^,