A/N: Thank you for subscribing to this story, thank you for joining this Jensoo journey. This fic was honestly just an inspiration for other writers to get their grammar game right. And you know, just have a thought through plan, what will happen next. There are just a few writers out there who can write from scratch and create the most beautiful worlds with characters filled with life. I applaud to them. Therefore, I really suggest for most of the authors on aff to at least get theirs stories beta read. Most of us are not native English speakers on here, this should be motivation enough to get the best you can do, right? Ok, now please enjoy.

"Uhhh… Nope," I mumbled as I tore the paper off the writing pad, scrunching it up into a tight ball and throwing it carelessly aside. My fingers reached for my pen again, while I moved to sit cross-legged on the chair and tucked my feet underneath my thighs.

The winter this year… feels especially dull.

A quick twirl of the pen around my digits, and I went back to staring at the writing pad before me, my mind as blank as the paper was. As the seconds ticked by, I resisted the urge to muss up my hair in frustration.

I don't know what to say. After all this time, I still don't know what to say.

After chewing nervously on the pen for another good minute or so, I decided to give up. With a loud groan, I fell back against the chair, catching a glimpse of the calendar on my desk in the process.

15th of Mai 2018. Depending on how you see it, it is either one day to the end of the world, around 640 days since I left Seoul. Yeah, I literally left my soul in Seoul…

Thinking back, everything seems so surreal.

It felt like a dream even then, considering how I was practically stuck in a daze for the first few days that followed my return to New Zealand. Thankfully, my aunt's wedding went well, and my mother was more than pleased that I was able to persuade Jiyong to attend. At the very least, it kept the woman from pestering me on every living thing I met in back in Korea.

Shortly after the celebrations were over, I travelled back to my University which is located at the city of Wellington in the south of the northern island of New Zealand, to start my new semester. Little did I expect, that was also the beginning of what I call "Welcome to Hell".

I had hoped that school would provide a welcome distraction from my distracting thoughts, and my wish was granted because I soon found myself buried in work and surviving on caffeine. Amazingly enough, though, all the sleep deprivation could not stop me from compulsively checking the internet at all hours for any news (or more accurately, gossip) on a certain idol on the other side of the equator.

The point is, based on whatever I could find on the world wide web, it was obvious that Jewel girl was getting more successful by the day. She swept more awards, acted in more movies, and even recorded an English album to launch her career in the US. She must have been inspired be CL’s “Hello es”. I was genuinely happy for her.

Nevertheless, along with her rise in stardom also came an growing flood of dramatic rumors about her love life. Surfing the net consequently became a sadomasochistic habit – I wanted to know, but at the same time I didn't want to know. Just three months ago, I read that she was involved in yet another scandal with an actor she was working with.

I had slammed my laptop shut faster than you can say "yikes".

Despite my best efforts not to do so, my mind often wondered about where she was, what she was doing and whether she was well. But no matter how much googling I did, and how many articles I read, the curiousity in me could not be sated. In the end I realised that I wasn't actually interested in all these. No, I wanted to know who she was with, what she was thinking about and whether she was happy without me. And that, unfortunately, was beyond the expertise of the internet god.

Now, you might say, why don't I just talk to her? Well guess what, I have been meaning to write to her; I just haven't figured out what to say. If you haven't noticed, that is the reason why I've been crumpling balls of paper and tossing them across the room.

It is probably a mistake trying to write to Jisoo using pen and paper. I had decided to do so because I thought that would be more, err, romantic, but looking at the overflowing wastepaper basket in the corner of the room, I think I should have stuck to typing instead. It's almost certain that I would be reincarnated in my next life as a tree.

Speaking of which, if I do not want an early demise I'd better get dressed, because otherwise I'll be—

I glanced at the clock on the wall.

LATE.

Holy crap!

I seized the pen once more and, after ruffling my fringe in annoyance, scribbled intently on the writing pad. I then folded the paper as neatly as I could in my frantic state and stuffed it into an envelope, which was in turn dropped into my leather satchel.

Seven minutes later, I was half-walking and half-running along the streets of Wellington. My rapid breaths appeared as little white puffs in the chilly air, while the satchel and drawing tube I had slung across my shoulders bounced with each step I took. All that physical activity and the coat and boots I was wearing, however, could not keep me warm, and I had also wrapped a yellow scarf around my neck.

Before long, I reached a traffic junction. But instead of heading straight, I made a right turn into a small lane. I stopped in front of a bright red letterbox and opened my satchel to retrieve the envelope. As I reached forward to place the envelope at the slot, my hand started shaking.

I hesitated.

Is there any point in writing to her now?

Maybe I shouldn't disturb her life.

Maybe…

It's time for me to let go.

At last, I withdrew my hand and put the letter back in my satchel.

Damn it.

Any miserable thoughts that followed, nonetheless, were cut short by another glance to my watch. It was 9.42 am.

Yikes!

I quickly spun around and headed towards the traffic junction and in the direction, I should have originally went. After what seemed like the longest sprint in my life, I spotted the familiar stretch of white and grey buildings in the distance. Hanging on tightly to my bag and drawing tube, I sped across the square, into the building, up the flight of steps…

And ran headlong into the one woman (other than my mother) that could freeze me with just one look.

"Oh, pardon me," I started, when I lifted my gaze. I gulped. "Good—good morning, Miss Gong."

The woman's brows were tightly furrowed as she glowered at me. "Good morning, Jennie. I assume you remember that we were supposed to meet at nine forty-five?"

"Yes. I'm very sorry that I'm late, Miss Gong." I tried not to squeak.

Her eyebrow twitched, but she whirled around and stepped back into the room. I heaved a sigh of relief as I hastily followed. I'm probably one of the few lucky knights who have not been roasted by Minzy.

For those of you who are wondering, Minzy Gong, is my tutor. She's an extremely talented in basically everything she does. Owner of a dancing academy, really good at performing. Minzy decided to tutor me in business. She’s of course good at it, she’s just a natural leader. Hence students are always clamouring for her to be their tutor despite her barely having any time. I count myself blessed that she had decided to pick me, and I think she actually likes me quite a bit, despite that fierce front.

Why I am studying business? I just want to be like her. Own a business and maybe…maybe be well known enough in New Zealand to find her way here, to me. Like a lighthouse.

"Show me your excel lists," she said grimly as she settled on the armchair. I immediately opened my laptop, showing her my study based work on business strategy.

"Hmm…" Minzy hummed as she considered the input of graphics and statistics, and I unconsciously held my breath.

Good?

"Explain it to me."

Phew.

"Ah, yes, I thought about it again," I said…

"Jennie?"

"Jennie!"

"Hu—h?" I sputtered as I snapped out of my trance, "sorry, Miss Gong?"

"Were you listening to me?"

"I—umm—I'm sorry," I replied as I stared guiltily at the table. Having explained my ideas to her, we had embarked on a detailed discussion on how we could further refine them. Somewhere along the way, however, my conscious faded out and into another topic.

Jisoo.

Minzy exhaled heavily and leaned back against the chair, tapping her nails on the table. "What's the matter with you, Jennie?"

I looked up at once. "Nothing's the matter."

"Are you sure?" She quirked an eyebrow, and to my surprise, sat forward and spoke in a much gentler tone. "I have been your tutor for almost a year now, Jennie. While I can't say that your work has fallen into the pits, you seem a lot more… unfocused, these days."

My gaze fell back to the table, and I stayed silent.

"You do know that exams are coming up soon, right?"

I nodded mutely.

"Well, you have to remember that the other examiners are not going to be merciful to you. And you deserve much better than a mediocre grade."

"I think we should stop here for today," Minzy added as she stood up from her seat. "Go back and have a good think about what I've said, at least what you've actually heard, and schedule another meeting with me in a week's time."

"Yes, Miss Gong. Thank you."

The tutor gave me a disapproving shake of her head and left the room, leaving me in an even worse mood than before. But she was right. At this rate, I'm going to have a big problem getting into the Master's programme next year.

I got up slowly as well and started packing my bag. Halfway through, my phone rang. Or should I say, my new phone rang.

"Hello?" I answered the phone by wedging it between my ear and shoulder, while my hands were busy trying to shove my laptop back into the bag.

"JENNIE!"

Since I was trapped in a rather inconvenient position, I could only wince as the sound rattled my eardrum and threatened to turn my brains to mush. "Lisa? Why on earth are you shouting?"

"I should be the one asking, where on earth were you these couple of days? I couldn't call through at all! I thought something happened to you!"

I sighed as I raised my hand to hold the phone. "Sorry, Lisa. My phone fell into my soup while I was eating and drowned. I only got it replaced last night." I decided to leave out the part that the poor device had dropped into the soup because – you guessed it – I was distracted by my thoughts of Jisoo. I didn't want my best friend to start hollering at me again.

"But you weren't answering your emails too!"

I smacked my forehead. "Oh yes, I forgot to tell you that I moved out a few weeks ago. The building I was renting in caught fire and I had to move out. The landlord was nice enough to arrange for me stay temporarily at another place near school, but I haven't gotten the internet hooked up yet."

Given all the work I was saddled with, it was a pain having to move to another apartment. The benefit of not having an internet connection, though, was that I could finally kick my habit of tracking Jisoo's news.

"And why didn't you tell me? Or your parents? Your mom was worried sick!" My best friend continued to admonish me over the phone.

"Umm, I didn't want to bother you guys… and later I got so busy I forgot…" I gave a sheepish laugh, hoping to appease the boiling blonde on the other side of the line. "I'm sorry. Please don't be angry with me?"

A mere "hmpf", was the response I got.

"Pretty please? Pretty, pretty please?"

"Good grief!" Lisa declared, but her voice was no longer as harsh as before. "I'm glad that you're safe and sound. How was your birthday celebration yesterday?"

I grimaced. "Eh… It was… Interesting…"

"You were out with Ariana, Nicki and Zara again, weren't you? Wait, don't tell me, I don't want to know."

I chuckled as I closed the buckle on my satchel and swung the strap on my shoulder. Lisa has never approved of those girls she called "delinquents". Not that I disagreed with the label.

Striding out of the room and down the corridor, I suddenly recalled something. "Oh, I received your present."

The blonde gave a nervous cough. "So, do you like it?"

"Mmm, it's…"

"It's?"

"It's…"

She was probably wringing her hands anxiously as she awaited my answer.

"It's what? It's what?"

"It's… square and brown."

A few moments passed while Lisa processed my words. I quickly pulled the phone away from my ear.

"OF COURSE IT'S SQUARE AND BROWN! IT WAS IN A BOX!"

"I'm asking you, whether you liked it!"

I was laughing so hard as I trooped down the steps that I feared I was going to do a humpty dumpty-had-a-great-fall thing. I paused to catch my breath. "I love it, Lisa. You're very sweet."

"Well... as long as you like it…" the blonde grudgingly replied. I could hear her grumbling under her breath about how I always had to make things difficult.

"Anyway," she spoke again, "I've been trying to call you because I need to tell you something important."

"Such as?" I adjusted the bag strap on my shoulder, before pushing the door open and exiting the building. There was still some time before lunch, hence the square was rather deserted, and I seemed to be the only one around.

Or… not.

"Have you been following the news?" Lisa asked excitedly.

"Not really…" I murmured. There was a lone figure standing beside one of the lampposts. I squinted, trying to make out who that person was.

As I went forward, my heart rate sped up, while my pace slowed.

"You won't believe it! They say that the Jewel Girl  is no longer in Korea!"

"They say, they say—"

I halted in my steps.

"They say she has decided to move to Wellington."

There she was, standing in the winter chill, her arms wrapped tightly around her as she bounced lightly on her feet. Her head turned this way and that, as if she was searching for someone.

I was dumbstruck. I didn't even realize that I had lowered the arm holding the phone to my side, or the fact that Lisa was still chattering on the phone.

"Apparently, she's taking a year off to do theatre studies… Hello? Jennie? Are you there?"

Time seemed to slow to a crawl as she finally turned to face my direction. My mouth felt dry.

Yes, I'm here. And so is she.

The two of us remained stock still, staring at each other. When my initial shock wore off, I noticed that her purple hair was no longer purple- in fact they were pitch black. They also had grown longer, reaching almost the waistline of her yellow toggle coat, and her ivory skin had gotten even paler. Other than that, she looked just as I remembered. Icy, proud… and so incredibly beautiful.

Blinking several times to make sure that I wasn't hallucinating, I swallowed thickly, and opened my mouth to speak. "Jisoo, what a surp—"

"You."

Before I could react, she was stomping towards me. As she got closer, it dawned on me that the expression on her face was not happiness, or even sadness, but anger. Pure anger.

"You—you liar!"

My eyes had grown wide by now and I was actually staggering backwards. "What—"

Too many times I had imagined how it could be like if she reappeared in front of me, but of all the dramatic scenarios I had conjured, this was not one of them.

Just as I was struggling to understand what I had done to earn her wrath and why I looked like I was fleeing for my life, she stopped her advance. Her eyes, though, continued to flash dangerously. "You said that you'll write to me."

"You said that you'll write to me, but you never did."

At the back of my head, I recalled what I had said to her during my last goodbye. Her accusing tone, nevertheless, touched a raw nerve in me. At that instant, it was as if the wall holding back my emotions broke, and all my doubts, insecurities and frustrations started spewing out at once.

"What th— And how am I supposed to know whether to contact you, when you didn't even bother sending me off at the airport?" I retorted.

She looked stunned for a moment, but soon resumed her battle stance. "I told you, it would be inconvenient—"

I didn't let her finish the sentence.

"What am I supposed to think, when the only thing you did was to leave me some photographs?" With a note that seemed to say everything, yet nothing at all?

"Wh—what does it matter?" she shot back at me. "The fact is, you made a promise and you didn't keep it."

I clenched my jaw; I wanted to scream. Am I the only one who finds it ridiculous that after more than a year of separation, the first thing she does is to confront me about not writing to her? Why is she so hung up over this anyway?

What does she actually mean?

I was tired of obsessing about her. For the entire year I have been guessing and second-guessing, revisiting every memory again and again and trying to interpret her every word, trying to read between the lines, trying to find a sign.

I had enough.

"Fine! You know what? I didn't write to you because I didn't want to," I spat, the spiteful words leaving my lips even as I felt sick to the stomach.

The girl let out a growl and pushed me so hard that I stumbled and fell. My satchel went down with me, causing the items inside to spill out.

Jisoo appeared stricken as she rushed forward to help me up, but I stubbornly refused her hand. She then turned and noticed the envelope with her name on the ground.

"No, don't!" I shouted, but she had already snatched the letter away and tore it open. I watched with anxiety as she carefully unfolded the letter, her gaze running over the words. At last, she mouthed the last sentence I knew too well.

I think, I left my heart with you in Seoul.

I have never felt so vulnerable in my life.

She kept her head bowed, hence I could not see the expression on her face. When she eventually spoke, her husky voice was so low it was almost a whisper. "And how do you think I feel?"

"How do you think I feel, when you left? When I kept waiting for you to contact me, but you never did?"

No answer.

"Do you…do you know how difficult it was for me to find you?" Her voice cracked.

I was stumped. I never gave her my address or my contact number in New Zealand. I never even told her where exactly in New Zealand I was studying. How she managed to find me, I don't know.

My eyes widened in realisation. "How long have you—"

In my distress, I was blind to the fact that her skin was so pale not just from the lack of sun; that she was trembling so hard not merely because she was agitated.

God I’m so utterly stupid. She must be freezing.

She must have waited at the square for a very long time. Perhaps for a number of days, given that I didn't have fixed classes and went to school only occasionally to meet my tutors.

"I—"

More importantly, she was upset because she had been waiting for a letter that never came. For something to assure her that I didn't vanish from her life altogether.

I was at loss for words.

"I'm sorry…" I eventually articulated slowly, "I'm sorry for everything."

Shame. Embarrassment. That’s how I felt.

The tears started streaming down her face openly, and I also felt a lump rising in my throat.

"Idiot!" Jisoo cried as she wiped away the tears on her face angrily.

And then, I understood.

What I should have said, what she would have said, what we could have said.

There are certain things, which need not be spelt out in words.

I broke into a broken chortle while shaking my head. "I'm an idiot. God I am, am I not?"

Jisoo looks up at me, surprised.

In the next second, I finally managed to cross the short, but once seemingly unbridgeable distance between us. I wrapped my arms around her, my hands rubbing her back in a bid to warm her up and calm her down. The girl initially tensed up, but eventually relaxed into the embrace and buried her face in my shoulder.

Her ragged breathing gradually eased.

"You're my idiot," came the small muffled voice.

I paused. That's right, so much unnecessary doubts.

"I'm your idiot," I smiled broadly as I held her even more tightly.

Sometimes, life takes you places that you didn't think you wanted to go.

Sometimes, you meet people that you never thought you'll need.

And sometimes, the ice-missiles-shooting stranger you meet will turn out to be just the one for you.

At the sound of familiar footsteps, I hurriedly minimized my browser window.

"What are you doing?" Jisoo asked softly as she s her arms around my shoulders and nuzzled against my neck. "You've been typing non-stop on the laptop these days."

"Mmm, nothing much," I replied lightly, swiveling my chair around and resting my hands on her hips. "Just doing some writing. Why, are you upset that I haven't been spending enough time with you?"

The girl rolled her eyes, though the corners of her lips twitched upwards. "You think too highly of yourself. I'm just reminding you that it's time for dinner." Ignoring the protest that came in the form of a pout, she pulled away from me and strolled out of the room.

I chuckled. Oh, I'm so whipped.

I rose from my seat and stretched my stiff muscles. I then made my way into the living room, where Jisoo was already dressed in her black coat and matching boots and waiting by the door. She handed my coat to me, and I obediently put it on.

"The story," Jisoo said as her fingers worked nimbly to button my coat, "what is it called?"

I huffed in amusement as I gazed into her inquisitive eyes which, in my humble opinion, shine brighter than the most brilliant jewel in the world.

I should have known that she wouldn't let it go.

"Well, it's called…"

I leaned in to give her a gentle peck on the nose. As always, a pink tinge blossomed on her cheeks.

"Sanding Korea’s Jewel”, I replied grinning with my eyes closed tightly, while holding her in my embrace.

“God Jisoo I’m so in love with you.” I added and while smashing our lips together. Her sinfully pink heart shaped lips, that I can call mine.

Jisoo whimpering my name, barely audible – I’m in heaven. The most beutiful sound I have ever heard. Period.

THE END

A/N: That’s it. Now I can concentrate on my life again. See ya~ CHICAGO - HARD TO SAY I'M SORRY.