Cha Hakyeon

 

After he arrived home, Hakyeon feels happy today. Happiest he has felt in a while. Hongbin finally decided to let people close to him, talked about his story. Taekwon with whom he couldn't get anywhere even though he tried his best was starting to talk. He even offered to take Hongbin home considering he even helped jaewhan with his incident with the label. He is acting more alive. Jaewhan even while smiling and cracking up jokes here and there is still not properly healed his emotional wounds but with time everything will be alright. Time is the best medicine after all. Ravi and hyuk they are the ones who remain. Telling their story is the first step and the entire step that they need to take after that leave time to heal everything.

“Nothing lasts forever. Like your life turned upside down in a moment and everything changed. Everything will change again. Pain won't disappear but it will become bare able and you will be able to laugh again." He remembers these lines his counsellor told him. Little genius

When he heard about the girl from Hongbin he was shocked. She must have made him go to river Han that day so he could save her life like she saved his. After his counselling ended, she cut off all her contacts with him because that's how she worked. There is lots of chances they are different people but something in his gut tells him, they are the same cause the reason he followed Hongbin around was he resembled the person she always talked about, her life. She didn't tell Hakyeon her life person's name because she thought work should be professional and shouldn't involve a counsellor’s personal life though she could act friend with patient to gain their trust. She was always the one in patient's gown while he was the patient but he didn't know why? And even when he asked she wouldn't tell. He really wanted to meet her again to thank her but looks like he won't because she is dead. He needs to talk to Hongbin and ask where they cremated her so he could thank her, meet her but before that he has to conform it's really her. Hakyeon won't cry because she last told him that "Separation is absolute so instead of being focused on, we won't meet again. We should be happy; we ever met and shared moments that we could cherish."

 

Jung Taekwon

Taekwon is back to his apartment, his empty apartment with nothing but emptiness. He has the place filled with trophies, certificates and achievements but nothing is filled, it's all empty. Unlike other day his empty apartment is not unbearable. He is not feeling the best but he is not feeling worst either. He is not yet ready to start living but he kind of wants to give up dying, especially after hearing Hongbin’s story. He remembers the Hongbin's girl because that line Hongbin had told hit him hard. You can always replace me but never forget me. Like the girl was to Hongbin, soccer was to him. He has no choice now but to replace soccer from his life but that doesn't mean he has to forget it. Why was he trying to forget it? Soccer was his everything. He should never forget it, like Hongbin will never forget the girl. He should live for the soccer that lives inside him, his soccer that made him Leo of the field. Meeting these people has sparked something within him. He was continuing not dying like Hongbin but will be able to start living again? There are people who can't have tomorrow while he was the one who is afraid. He has to live and live again, endless tomorrows but He has found some courage and something he thought he would never find again hope and faith. He wants to give it a try living but how? He doesn't know but he knows there are people who are willing to help him. He is one of the oldest among the group but needing help from donsengs is embarrassing but he should try. He makes up his mind, he will try. He sighs to himself and chuckles thinking how he had got himself into all of this. He didn't volunteer for it but he doesn't dislike it either. He should probably go to sleep.

 

Lee jaewhan and Kim Wonshik

 

He was fine. He really was until he entered his apartment but now he feels so lonely. He feels alone and insecure. He should have begged Wonshik to drop the kid off first then stay with him or come back to his house after he drops the kid off. He is the kind of person who needs someone next to him 24/7 so his mind doesn't eat him up. When his head start to kill him slowly with all those mean words he ever heard, "orphan, alone is all you'll ever be “and so many others. Ever since he became a singer he always tried to be as affectionate as possible and please others so he won't be left alone but now he was alone, right? His mind suddenly thought of the kid who pulled him, angry flower boy whose words were knife, innocent liar cat man, sweet brown honey man and little shy Wonshik. He thought of all the conversation and stories he had heard from them. He wasn't alone right? As to answer his question, on cue his door unlocked and Wonshik was there.

"Hey, hyung I'm crashing here tonight. I don’t have home. I was kicked out of dorms if you remember and I don't think I can handle being alone or leave you alone after what happened." Ravi declared and sat next to jaewhan in his couch. 

"What do you think about that counseling group? Are still alone after you met them?" Jaewhan asked.

" Mm, yeah,  I'm alone and I'll always be but I'm not the only one alone now, we are just all alone together. You know?" Ravi answers not sure himself. 

" I know you are just being chic wonshik. You know you can trust them but you don't want to admit it because you just met them. Don't forget, They told you their story and they just met you too. You think they would have told this to anyone. I know it's hard for you. Especially after what happened to her but learn to trust people." Jaewhan told Ravi knowing he just talked about the most sensitive part of his life.

"I should listen to you. You know that hongbin's girl's line it reminds me of her. She said similar things to me "forget me not if I don't come back" before she was taken by them. I should have never let those monsters take her. They didn't save her just didn't let her die." Ravi whispered the last part but jaewhan clearly herd that.

"Are you still looking for him?" Jaewhan asked.

"No, I never looked for him. She said he would try his best to come to me, If I didn't go. After we meet we have to fulfill her wishes so I'm just waiting. I don't think he will be able to come or find me, just 2 months remain and after that everything will be over. I have started to loose hope. 2 months and I won't have to force myself to live." Ravi says with no emotion like a robot trying to hide his emotion.

"Ravi-ah, she gave you this new name to start a new life not to end it. Do you think she would be happy to meet you in afterlife after knowing you lived miserably and killed yourself all because of her?" Jaewhan asked

"I don't know, I don't know, it's too hard. Knowing she died and I could do nothing still kills me. What if I can't fulfill her wishes too? it will kill me even more and it's already too late we only have 2 months." Ravi said helplessly.

"Nothing is late. You still have 2 months. All of us will help so please don't give in to fear. You are Ravi. And reconsider everything once again since you already have to tell them everything, why not ask for some help too?" Jaewhan asked.

" I'll reconsider. It's late we should sleep. You know we have that group counseling thing." Ravi says not wanting to talk anymore. They just enjoy silence not the usual emptiness they used to share.

 

 

Lee Hongbin

Hongbin is back on his apartment. Leo helped him up to his room and left. That man is really a man of few words to none but He can't believe he did it. He actually told his story. He looks at the list on the diary on his desk. " I think I have pushed it back enough. I should start this, right?" He looks at the smiling photo on his desk and continues. " I didn't knew when to start but without even trying it has started. I actually did the first thing on this list you left for me. You gave me a dead line of 3 years, right? It's 2 months before I reach the dead line. Will I be able to complete it ? I want to try it for real, all this time I had been avoiding it cause the last thing I have to do on the list is not something I can do. I'll never do it but I can't use that as excuse to avoid doing other things on list too. right?" He looked at the list one last time and put it in his work bag. He had already let them know everything, he might as well let them see this and ask for help, maybe? But one thing's for sure Hakyeon will help after he tries to kill Hongbin because they have only two months and there are lots of things to do. He will ask for help after he listen to other's stories. He is curious about others, too.

 

 

Han SangHyuk 

 

He enters his empty house. His mother is back at it again, Her lab that she wants him to take over but he rejected knowing all to well what she had been doing there. She still won't give up and try to pressure him. He is 17 but already Ph.D. Passed because only that way he can afford his normal high school life. He is just a lab rat that's going to run her lab after she dies. Why wasn't his life normal? He was jealous of the hyungs. They could even die if they want to but he can't because he doesn't know what that hag would do? She sent him school and pretend all normal high schooler's mom to hide her illegal experiments. He remembers a girl who had told him she would come to save him . He waited and waited and grew impatient so he did everything in his power to find her. He wanted to be free and the only clue he got was river han. He couldn't find her but the way to die. River Han only place where his mother's transmitter won't work. He thought if he jumped off the bridge his mother won't be able to stop him like other time. But jaewhan was there and he met Hongbin, he thought he met male version of The girl because he was so much like her sassy but kind hearted and hot headed personality and all. He wanted to know him so he stayed and today was a shock, Hongbin's story.  He didn't knew how to react and tears fell down his eyes. He could relate to him. He was happy, he wasn't the only one and angry why he wasn't able to still love her? Did he ever loved her? If He still loves her than why was he blaming her for dying? It's not her fault but his. He wasn't able to protect her while she still tried to save him. 

"No one can help you if you don't help yourself. I have tried my best but I don't know if he will come in time for you so, you have it right? help yourself, find him instead if he doesn't come and I don't want to suggest this but if it's too hard then river Han is the clue for you. Sorry, I died first." Hyuk remembers the her words. 

She had left them for him to one of the researchers in the lab who gave him the drive after he worked in the lab for 6 months doing what he hated the most and another 6 trying to open the drive without getting the data erased. He was sure she placed the security so him mom wouldn't find it.

 "If that person can't help me then I'll help myself. If he won't come than I'll go to him. I'm sure hyungs will try to help if they knew everything. 2 months is all I have. " Hyuk thought. 

It's strange how he can easily trust these guys and it's not been that long since they met. He went to lab for daily test results of his body cause he was a lab rat after all. Then he went to sleep before that devil called his mom gets new experiment idea to try on him.

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