yerim groans as she scrolls through her bank account summary on her laptop.

"i'll work extra shifts at the bar." yerim announces, and seulgi nods in agreement from beside her.

"i'll focus on getting more customers. my boss said he'll offer me a bonus if the site does well this month." seulgi adds, fidgeting with her fingers.

"we can tide over the rent if we work together." seungwan finishes, patting each of them on the hand just as her phone vibrates on the table.

the eldest leaves the two younger girls to converse amongst themselves, shutting herself behind the white door of her room before raising her phone to her ear.

seungwan knows her mistake the second she hears her mother's voice on the other end of the phone.

"seungwan, when are you sending money home?"

"soon, mom." seungwan answers tiredly, because she really was worn out--she was sick of raising a family that only had her older brother's interests in mind.

"seungwan," comes her mother's voice again, more urgently. "i need you to send it now. the people--the loan sharks are here and-"

seungwan's eyes widen. "loan sharks? the did dongwoon do to provoke them?"

"he borrowed money, seungwan-"

"he borrowed money? for what?" seungwan bites her lip to keep from screeching. "is the money i send back every week to feed him not enough? don't forget i paid for his goddamn house, mom. he has no excuse to get extra money."

"i'm sure it was a mistake." her mother pleads, "just bring the money now. they have knives and you know your father-"

seungwan taps the red button on her phone screen, terminating her mother's voice. she grabs her purse and her coat from the hanger.

"i'm leaving." seungwan calls out to the girls as she bursts from her room, who are still brainstorming ways to match the growing rent rates in the living room.

"isn't it a little early?" seulgi asks. "i thought your date with yoongi was at seven."

"i don't want to be late." seungwan lies easily as she moves swiftly out the door. she doesn't, however, set out for the restaurant she had agreed upon meeting yoongi at. instead, she heads to her parents' house.

or rather, at this point, her failure of a brother's house. the house that she had paid for, that should've been hers.

when she arrives at the door of the meager line of old-fashioned houses, a group of men greet her at the door. one, in particular, seems to be the leader, wearing a bright red baseball cap and a ripped leather jacket.

seungwan pretends not to notice the knife gripped in the man's hand.

"where's my mom?" she asks immediately, and the men gesture to her mother huddled with her nephew on the floor. one of them begins to laugh, and another soon joins. the two sound like a monkey and a wolf, carnal.

"how much does he owe?" seungwan's voice comes harshly as her immobile father can be heard protesting from the closed door of his bedroom.

"two million won." a man in a tattered green coat answers, who takes out his own pocket knife and shoves it in her direction. "give us the money, or else."

seungwan wills herself to keep her mask of indifference plastered on her face.

son seungwan, do not show your fear.

"i didn't bring enough. let me call someone to get the money." she tries, cringing when a smirk reveals the cigarette tar on the goon's teeth.

son seungwan is not going to die, she thinks to herself, quite calmly for someone who is being pointed at with a blade.

when he nods, seungwan nestles a hand in her purse. picking up her phone, she dials a familiar set of numbers, her fingers trembling as they tap the glass screen.

when the dial tone cuts off and the receiver of her call is connected, she in a breath.

"yoongi. i'm not going to make it." she says, but there is no answer. only a still silence echoes back at her that doesn't quite settle.

so she hangs up, setting her phone down on the mahogany wood table of her childhood home, her hand curling into a steely fist at her side as she clenches her jaw and eyes the men warily.

the red-capped leader stares back at her, seemingly bored, before his lazy grin cracks into a malicious smirk. "so," he drawls, his voice unbearable to her like chalk screaming down the chalkboard, "the money isn't coming, is it?"

"no." seungwan answers through gritted teeth, and her mother sends her a horrified glance, almost like the glint in a mouse's eyes before it is caught by the cat.

the man inhales sharply, as if he relishes in the smell of fear that fills the meager residence.

he doesn't, however, get the chance to exhale when smooth metal pushes against his temple.

seungwan stares, wide-eyed at the sight of him.

"yoongi." she breathes, though she doesn't exactly know how--her heart is practically bursting at this point. her eyes trail the extended arch of his arm and sees the gun curled in his fist.

seungwan knows by the look in min yoongi's eyes that he wouldn't hesitate to shoot it.

sungjong, from beside yoongi, tosses one of the men a thick pocket of money.

"get lost." yoongi says, and, as if his words are magic, the men are out of the house in a matter of seconds, the dirt stains from their filthy boots left behind on the carpet.

then, seungwan moves, tears of relief blurring her vision as she steps into the comforting shelter that is min yoongi.

"wannie." he says, holding her as her arms encircle his waist.

she sinks in his embrace, because son seungwan has never felt more fearful and vulnerable in her life. he, in turn, pats her back gently, the leather of his gloves cold against her skin.

"i knew something was wrong when you were late." yoongi chuckles quietly. he hands his gun to a nearby sungyeol as he smooths her scarlet locks with his gloved fingers. "by the time you called me, i was already on the way."

"how did you know where i was?" seungwan asks, still trembling slightly, but yoongi shakes his head.

"let's find a more suitable place." he suggests instead, and seungwan nods in agreement.

"mom," she addresses her mother coldly, "tell dongwoon to come back out of hiding and face what he's done."

with a bow to her mother--who seems more relieved than she should be at her daughter having found a way to bring more money to the house--seungwan leads the way out of the household. she'd much rather not have to contemplate these things near her wreck of a family, anyways.

when they've settled in a fairly empty coffee shop with seven men on the guard, seungwan stifles the tens of questions bubbling in and flattens them into one.

"why me?" she asks, watching the waiter place a cup of black coffee in front of her.

the two words, simple in their nature, have a much more intricate meaning when asked between two lovers.

"why?" he repeats, and seungwan nods.

he glances off to the side a bit, his leg quivering slightly under the table, in through his teeth--a quirk he often had when thinking deeply that seungwan had picked up on over the years.

finally, he answers. "maybe it was because you didn't question me. from the beginning, you trusted me blindly. maybe it was naive, but it made me curious. it was refreshing, so to speak."

seungwan laughs dryly. indeed, she was desperate two years ago to earn a living in seoul--more desperate than she was now, if that was possible.

"you know how i feel?"

it is his turn to ask, and seungwan's turn to think.

"yoongi, i can't do this." is all she says, and the light in min yoongi's eyes dim.

"your family won't accept me?" he guesses, somewhat bitterly.

seungwan shakes her head, thinking to the expression on her mother's face when yoongi had given those men that much money--money which seungwan would no doubt be unable to repay.

she knows he deserves to be told frankly. "it's worse--my family will use you, yoongi. at this point, i'd rather them not accept you than them take your money and pressure you to solve their goddamn problems for my sake."

his harsh countenance softens almost immediately.

"you must trust me," yoongi begins, "but regardless, it's your decision. i'll always be waiting for you, wannie."

seungwan nods, gratefulness seeping into her bones. in the end, he understands, he always will.

"i'll pay the money back in the meantime-" she begins to respond, but woohyun approaches yoongi from behind and stops her mid-sentence.

"spades." woohyun greets with a bow, and yoongi narrows his eyes at the man.

"what is it?" min yoongi snaps, impatiently, for he was only ever gentle to seungwan, really.

"the house is waiting, sir." comes woohyun's answer, crisp as ever.

"damn the house." yoongi curses, "tell the joker we won't be coming over for dinner tonight."

"but the duty--"

"it is the royals' duty." he hisses, "i am no royal. if anyone should fulfill it, should it not be jongdae? the diamonds could use some fresh blood, anyways."

"the jack of diamonds has yet to come of age." woohyun reminds him, and seungwan shudders at the cold dust which floats under the dim light in yoongi's eyes.

"spades--" sunggyu tries from his left, but yoongi shakes his head.

"stay in your place, ten." he replies harshly, low voice almost resembling a guttural snarl.

yoongi looks to seungwan, who immediately knows what he means to say by the downward waning of his pale, thin lips.

"don't worry about me," she says softly, her shoulders sagging as if one has placed a massive weight on them.

he nods, and before he leaves, he takes her hand, turning it over.

yoongi's finger dances across the plane of her palm, tracing his message into her skin.

A, she feels him write first, then, a distinct shape of an upside-down heart, followed by a triangle.

by the time seungwan glances up, the ghostly reflection of his lonesome figure is already chasing behind him pitifully.

she, in turn, remains sitting there, watching the wisps of winter's breath swirl from above her coffee.

it isn't until she's taken a small sip of the bitter, black drink that the final gear in her mind clicks into place.

min yoongi.

the ace of spades.

royals. ten. jack. diamonds. joker.

the house of cards.

the min yoongi that she has known for two years, is one of the leaders in the most elite underground gang of seoul. a gang which--before now--had been dismissed as a mere culmination of rumors.

and so seungwan returns home that night, seemingly enlightened--she now knows the truth, doesn't she?

but it is the light which has made the shadow looming precariously in her life, much, much darker.

---

when yerim feels jungkook's hands slide around her waist, she wills herself not to flip her and fall over the bridge she is standing on. she knows it's him by the way his body feels against her back--it's an all-too-familiar feeling that yerim now realizes she's taken for granted all these years.

"it's me, princess." he says before releasing her so she can turn to face him, and yerim smiles weakly when she feels her legs turn to jello.

"i know. thanks for coming." she murmurs. she'd texted him earlier to come meet her, mostly because ever since she'd revealed her feelings regarding jungkook to the group, she'd been restless. for the entire week, it was as if she'd suddenly gone crazy.

in any normal situation, yerim was the type to be upfront--if something bothered her, she was never hesitant to speak out about it. she'd never been shy about confessing to someone before, but now, in front of jungkook, she felt her hands clamming up and run dry.

why was she suddenly like this, awkward and at a loss for words? why was her confidence always stripped from her when she was with him?

more importantly, why had she always been pushing herself away from him, all these years?

it was these thoughts that had kept yerim up late, tossing and turning in her bed well into the early hours of the morning. she'd thought about it so much, in fact, that she'd eliminated several possibilities and developed an acceptable answer--such was the mindset that had catered her towards a technical profession.

no, it hadn't been that yerim didn't think she was pretty enough. yerim knew she wasn't bad looking. in fact, back in her high school days, her list of admirers was practically as bad as jungkook's--but jungkook had his fair share of pretty girls about him already, and beneath his golden-boy aura, yerim knew that he was a dork who searched for the hidden benevolence within all people.

that being said, the problem definitely didn't lie in jungkook, either. despite his sweet words and playboy appearance, jungkook wasn't a bad person, and in fact easy to talk to and extremely even-tempered.

however, yerim had realized, quite reluctantly yesterday night, that this was perhaps why she had never thought jungkook would like her. because in front of him there were never precautions (she always lost her defensive mindset to a blissful vulnerability), and she was herself, damn it all.

yes, perhaps it was because yerim's never quite tried to impress jeon jungkook before, and now that she suddenly finds herself adjusting her hair and picking at the hem of her shirt, she's terrified that it's too late to change his view of her. because jeon jungkook has seen her at her worst, at her weakest. and this being so, if they do decide to be together, to truly belong to each other, yerim knows that he'd take a greater chunk out of her than any regular boyfriend if they were to ever break up.

yerim sighs as they walk as they usually do, with jungkook at her side but never at her forefront. she walks faster than he does, though she never steps far in front of him. her legs are shorter, but his longer strides match her pace almost too perfectly.

ah, kim yerim, she thinks as they approach the marketplace, you're crazy. this is the same guy that's seen you crying at 2 A.M. in the morning, hungover. also the guy who's seen you throw up when you had the stomach flu, drool while sleeping, and laugh so hard you sounded like a dying cow.

yerim pretends not to mind when jungkook takes her hand in his, his warm, long fingers interchanging with her shorter ones comfortably as they always had, like they were made for each other.

her heartbeat, however, betrays her, thumping radically as the two sift hand-in-hand through the bustling crowd, eventually finding their way to a secluded area preceding the path to yerim's favorite hotpot joint.

"yeri, how long do you think we'll go on like this?" he asks when the noise around them has subsided almost completely, and she doesn't quite seem to understand.

tilting her head, yerim doesn't answer, because she's too lost, lost in those stars again as he says, "i think forever, i want to be like this forever."

yerim tilts her chin upwards to study jungkook, who stops in his tracks to meet her gaze.

"kookie," she speaks first before he can question, because she knows what he means to ask, anyways. in front of her, jeon jungkook had always been an open book, his every emotion stamped on his forehead.

"yerim?" he answers, and he almost seems scared of what she'll say next.

it's a childish fear that she senses from him then and there, as if she'll tell him that there isn't a forever. as if she'll say that she doesn't want the forever that he has so often told her about.

"remember i had something i wanted to say?" yerim begins, a bit tentatively.

he nods, and even though he stands above her a good amount, he suddenly seems small. his doe eyes are wide, his pale pink lips parted slightly.

this is it, she thinks. those words, those three damned words, almost roll off her tongue.

almost, until that voice in the back of her head whispers once more, that this might be when he'll finally leave her.

so instead, yerim shakes her head inwardly. she doesn't say what she's been meaning to say.

she does, however, ask a question she's been wondering for quite a while.

"what would you do if i went away?"

in the moment, she, too, is rendered a child, asking foolish questions such as these.

"i'll find you."

"you won't give up?"

"no."

"but what if you don't find me?"

"then i'll die," he chuckles, and she glares at him, but he pulls her closer and kisses her forehead.

"i'll die so in the next life i can be reborn as your shadow. and that way, i'll be able to follow you no matter where you go, and you'll never be lonely."

---

joy lounges casually on one of the seats in the hospital's hallway, watching as a flurry of green and blue caps emerge from the surgery room and disappear into the locker room.

if chanyeol were here, he'd laugh at her for voluntarily treading through territory reeking with blood, sickness, and disinfectant--all things that used to disgust her the most.

and no, park joy hadn't any business with the place. she'd gotten off her crutches and was weaning off her brace, and any other patient at her stage of recovery would have no qualms with leaving the hospital after their check-up.

joy, however, is here to await an opportunity, which (quite literally) lands at her feet when she sees a certain doctor kim seokjin approaching her in the hall.

"park sooyoung-ssi?" his steps pause when she stands to greet him.

she's quite delighted he's remembered her name, even if it's only the one that had been on her patient profile.

"i go by joy." she says, flashing her most alluring smile, "and really, i just wanted to thank you for all your help. according to doctor oh, i'll be off the brace in a few days. i was disappointed that i wasn't able to see you today at my check-up."

"it's not a problem," he answers, before adding while rubbing the back of his neck, "i'm sorry about that. i had a couple of surgeries scheduled."

joy holds her hand out, and he, in turn, shakes it in a manner that is a tad too professional for her taste. she giggles at his formality, because it seems that kim seokjin will be quite a conquest indeed.

"here's my number." she says when their hands fall once more to their sides, reaching forward to pluck a small strand of blue thread off his spotless white coat before she turns to limp away.

in her wake, she leaves a very, very, intrigued kim seokjin, who pats his coat pocket to see that she's somehow slipped her business card underneath.

curiosity, my dear friend, kills the cat.