“When I watched you walk down that aisle, my heart broke. It really did.”, the maknae forced out, choking down his sobs.

“Mine did too, because you weren’t at the other end. I saw your face and I just wanted to stop and come back…”, Sungmin cooed, his eyes watering at the memory.  “I was being an idiot, Kyuhyun-ah. I don’t know how I can ever prove to you that no matter how much time passes my heart is still yours.”

The words between the two fell silent as Kyuhyun continued to let out shaky sobs. But he let his love’s embrace hold him steady. For countless days, he blamed himself for being the cause of Sungmin’s absence. The idea that he was a bad lover gnawed painfully at his conscience. After all, he continuously made sacrifices for his lover. It burdened him that he had to keep it a secret- Sungmin was everything to be proud of.

Though Sungmin wasn’t the best at variety, singing or dancing, he was pretty good at everything. And that was fine. Kyuhyun was proud to stand next to him on stage, to share a room with him, and to be his other half. But that came crashing down far too quickly and far too easily. 

As the sobs quieted and silence began to ring through their ears, Sungmin released the younger from his embrace and placed gentle kisses on Kyuhyun’s eyes, followed by the tip of his nose and giggled softly at his dongsaengs innocence. Blinking slowly, Kyuhyun’s face broke into a soft smile, his gaze interlocking with Sungmin’s. Shyly, he closed the distance between them, placing a soft kiss on the warm, plush lips he could never forget.

Kyuhyun pulled away, shoving Sungmin hard away from him. “No, I don’t want this,”

“What do you mean? You don’t want me?” Sungmin’s hurt expression, lips parted in eager anticipation was almost enough for Kyuhyun to throw caution to the wind.

For nearly a year Sungmin had been bedding another woman, kissing her…touching her, consummating their love. It made Kyuhyun feel sick. Evident through social media, Sungmin went on many dates, holding hands and giggling in a facade of a happy couple, while Kyuhyun stayed home or worked. After all this time, as much as he loved the shorter man, Sungmin could not just enter his life again after being with a woman so soon before. 

“I want you, I want all of you, Min. But not like this. You’re just upset because you have a wife. You shouldn’t be doing this. Did you drink? I can call Sungjin to pick you up…” He forced, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. The way betrayal and hurt reflected in Sungmin's eyes made his heart palpitate painfully. 

He knew Sungmin didn’t drink, and he saw Sungmin’s honesty but Sungmin had to wait. Kyuhyun just wasn’t ready.