FIVE

“Here,” Jinae handed Kai one of her clean towels, “You should go take a warm bath, it’ll help make you feel better.”

Kai took the towel from her hands hesitantly, voicing out with a small voice for his gratitude. Jinae smiled in response, leaving him to himself to shower. He entered the small bathroom and smiled softly at the sight, though the bathroom was small, it was clean. He spotted her toothbrush and a few face washes by the sink and instinctively, he went nearer to take a closer at the soap bottles, picking each bottle up and reading its content. It’s been so while since he had so much freedom to do whatever he wants, showering at his own will, that all the objects in the bathroom felt so foreign to him. No scratch that, everything felt so foreign to him.

A few minutes later, he went out feeling refreshed. Jinae was right. It did make him feel a lot better after that single bath. Maybe it was because by showering he gets to clean his skin again, though not mentally at least physically. He noticed Jinae already dressed, ready to head out somewhere. He had no idea where and so he looked at her curiously. 

Kai still has a hard time speaking comfortably and he finds himself always doing gestures to communicate instead of speaking. He guessed it was because of the trauma, but what can he do? It will take him quite a while to get comfortable in speaking again and he hopes it can happen soon. He feels bad for not being able to express his gratitude in words to her and because of that, he’s determined to fix himself and pay back her kindness as soon as possible.

Jinae caught his glance and understood his stare– surprisingly. “I’m heading out to work. I have both shifts today so I won’t be back until night time.” She paused for a while, contemplating whether she should ask him or not. “Do you want to come with me?”

Kai nodded enthusiastically, and a small smile etched up his lips but Jinae doubt he noticed it.

“Oh and also, we have to go buy you some clothes and necessities.” She informed him as she put on her shoes and grabbed her keys. The boy too was about to put on his shoes but halted his actions. He looked at her and shook his head, a gaze saying that no there’s no need, it’s too expensive.

She smiled reassuringly at him, “Don’t worry, I’m getting my paycheck today, I’m sure it’ll be enough.”

That made Kai felt even more guilty. He opened his mouth to try and object but nothing came out. It was too difficult for him to speak and he himself grew frustrated. His body was so used to not speaking that it became very challenging for him to utter even a single word. This was going to take a while to get used to speaking.

“Kai,” she called out softly. “It’s okay, don’t force it out. And don’t worry okay, I’m sure we’ll manage somehow.”

The look on her face was so genuine and sincere that Kai could picture her smile inside his mind the whole day.

The walk to the cafe where Jinae works fascinate Kai a lot. Too much actually. He smiled softly at the feeling of the light breeze grazing onto his face gently. His lips parted at the freshness of the air. His smile grew even wider when the wind became a bit stronger, ruffling his hair in a gentle manner. The streets outside also captivate his eyes the most. The sight of people walking around, each of them going on through their day, doing their own business, place a smile yet a heavy heart in him. He envies these people who get to enjoy this freedom. The freedom where you can go wherever you want to go, the freedom where you can do whatever you want to do. Kai misses this feeling. He mis