exo more like exhoes

brohyun: GUYS HELP I CANT FIND JONGDAE

brohyun: HE’S BEEN GONE FOR OVER A DAY NOW AND HE HASN’T CALLED OR TEXTED ME

Mother: W H A T

brohyun: HE SAID HE WAS GOING OUT AND ??? STILL ISNT BACK AT THE DORM

brohyun: IVE BEEN WORRIED

innocent maknae: WHAT

innocent maknae: BUT JONGDAE’S MY FAVORITE

pcwhy: I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR FAVORITE???

innocent maknae: YIKES

unicornxing: jongdae’s missing?!

unicornxing: where would he go?

galaxyman: don’t tell me he got

gucci shades: KIDNAPPED?!!!

dog mom: i don’t think hes thAAT much of an idiot

galaxyman: this is jongdae you’re thinking of right

galaxyman: he once jumped off a 3 story building trying to do “parkour”

galaxyman: i don’t know how he only got off with a broken arm

satansoo: Have you tried calling him?

brohyun: YEAH LIKE TEN TIMES BUT HE HASN’T ANSWERED ANY

brohyun: WHAT IF ONE OF THOSE SAESANG FANS GOT HIM???????

Mother: THAT MOTHER’S ADRENALINE IS KICKING IN

Mother: IM CALLING 911

minnie mouse: hey guys, what did i miss?

brohyun: HYUNG JONGDAE IS MISSING

minnie mouse: uh no he’s not?

minnie mouse: he’s right here

minnie mouse: 

minnie mouse: he’s at lu and i’s spare apartment

brohyun: w h a t

minnie mouse: yeah he’s been here since yesterday?

minnie mouse: we’re playing overwatch together rn

minnie mouse: not to brag but I’m kicking his

Mother: oh my god I actually just had a heart attack

Mother: don’t ever scare me like that again

brohyun: omFG

brohyun: why the HELL hasnt he answered any of my calls or texts??

jongbro: sORRY I JUST REALIZED MY PHONE WAS DEAD

jongbro: dw yall im fine <3

jongbro: ill cya later baek i gotta get my revenge against minnie

brohyun: oh

brohyun: alright

private chat: best bro

brohyun: yOOOOOO

brohyun: bro where u at

brohyun: i havent seen u around all day?

brohyun: there’s a huge new arcade that opened down the street!

jongbro: wait didnt i tell u?

brohyun: ?????no

jongbro: im at the park with minnie

jongbro: 

jongbro: we were just messing around in the playground n feedin ducks and stuff it’s chill

brohyun: that kinda happened out of nowhere?

jongbro: idk lmao we just got bored at the dorm and he asked if i wanted to go somewhere so yeah

jongbro: i guess i forgot to tell u

brohyun: oh

brohyun: well that’s cool

jongbro: wAIT THERE’S A NEW ARCADE??????

brohyun: BRO

brohyun: BR O

brohyun: THEYV E GOT

brohyun: L A S ER T A G

jongbro: OMFGGGGG

jongbro: I SHOULD TELL MIN ABOUT IT WE CAN GO THERE NOWWWW

jongbro: HE ALWAYS BEATS ME IN LIKE EVERY GAME EVER BUT WHO KNOWS

jongbro: MAYBE LASER TAG WILL BE MY REDEMPTION???

brohyun: oh

brohyun: hahah

jongbro: weRE gonna head there now ;DD

jongbro: thx for the notice!!

jongbro: before i go

jongbro: u good? u seem kinda quiet rn

brohyun: nah!

brohyun: just a lil busy with some stuff and stuff yknow

brohyun: totally wasnt gonna ask u to the arcade or anything :)

jongbro: what was that message? u deleted it before i could read it lmao

brohyun: oh it was nothing important

brohyun: it was just some dumb stuff lol my brain is sleep deprived

jongbro: oh okAY

jongbro: GTG NOW SLEEP OR SOMETHIN BRO <3

brohyun: yeah sure

 private chat: BLOW IT LIKE A FLUTE

brohyun: hyung can we talk

brohyun: one 10 to another?

Han Dynasty: im an 11 but continue

brohyun: arent u kinda suspicious of how much time minseok and jongdae have been spending together recently?

Han Dynasty: wdym lmao? they’ve always been close

Han Dynasty: they literally call each other their BFFL

brohyun: yeah alright whatever but

brohyun: idk it was never like this??

Han Dynasty: baekhyun

Han Dynasty: they literally call themselves the ‘married couple’

Han Dynasty: they still continued to share a room even when min and i became a thing,, we only switched a couple of months ago

Han Dynasty: dae calls minnie his wife and minnie calls dae his second husband

Han Dynasty: (im first ofc ★~(◡‿⊙✿))

Han Dynasty: jongdae once said if xiuhan wasnt always so clearly a thing he would’ve gone after min the first chance he got

brohyun: OK I GET IT BUT HOW IS THIS MEANT TO REASSURE EITHER OF US

brohyun: HOW DO U KNOW MINSEOK HYUNG DOESNT HAVE HIDDEN FEELINGS OR SOMETHING IDK

brohyun: I DONT TRUST THIS

Han Dynasty: alright first things first

Han Dynasty: why do u suddenly think so lowly of minseok?

Han Dynasty: u two are best buds too???

Han Dynasty: secondly

Han Dynasty: i have no reason to be suspicious/jealous so i wont be

Han Dynasty: i love and trust minseok and dae is like a brother to me

Han Dynasty: besides, minnie isnt the Light Of Jongdae’s Life like he used to be back when we were trainees,,, the kid’s moved on and there’s really nothing but platonic feelings anymore

Han Dynasty: lmao he’s veeeryyy clearly got his eyes on someone else now anyways

Han Dynasty: thirdly

Han Dynasty: to combine these two things

Han Dynasty: r u sure ur not just jealous?

brohyun: why would i be jealous??

brohyun: who would i even be jealous of?

brohyun: i was just askin u a question?

Han Dynasty: boi if u dont,,,,,

Han Dynasty: u just said,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, n I quote,,,,,,,,,

Han Dynasty: “HOW IS THIS MEANT TO REASSURE EITHER OF US”

Han Dynasty: key word: us

Han Dynasty: im 1000000% sure that ur jealous of minseok bc of how much time he’s been spending with jongdae

brohyun: ok so it might seem that way

brohyun: but i can assure u that im not

brohyun: i was just worried! idek why

Han Dynasty: beeecausseeee you like jongdae?

brohyun: ofc i like jongdae??/??

brohyun: he’s my best friend

Han Dynasty: .........................sigh

Han Dynasty: u know what minseok told me yall were idiots when it came to love

Han Dynasty: i didn’t believe him about the jongin incident until now

brohyun: what jongin inciden