“I am not going in there,” I told him and he put he grabbed my shoulders, tight.

“Listen, he’s probably calling you in so that you can work here. I know you would love that. So, go inside because I am not ready to lose my friend. Go!”

“Dae, I…”

“NO!”

I pursed my lips and turned around. Great. Now, I would have to do this. I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready for the interview that I was about to be late for. I hadn’t even been ready to submit my thesis yet. I would be so ed.

I walked into the office space with the confidence of dry and dead leaf, pretty on the outside but easily torched and/or broken. I walked up to his secretary who just saw me and nodded me into his room. Great. He was free. Why was God so cruel?

I knocked on the door and was made to enter by a booming “Yes. Come in.”

“Hello, sir.”

“Ah, Maya,” he said, nodding. “Please, take a seat.”

Our Dean, Mr. Yu, was as funny as he was smart. He was also much older than sixty and somehow still working here which often made the students wonder if he was planted by the government. I also wondered how much he was paid to afford those suits that we wore. He never repeated the same one in a week… or even a month.

“Now, I know that after being with us for your masters and your Fellow Programme, you might want to leave,” he started. “But, here’s why you should reconsider. There’s a teaching position open. Although, it’s a minor position and since you won’t be made permanent for at least three years with a seventy-five per cent approval rate, I can give you several reasons to consider it. You already know everyone and are closely familiar with the material. Also, you’ll have your own office, you can move into a better place on campus if you want and of course, it’ll be completely free. Moreover, you can no longer…”

“Sir, I… would love to work here. But… I have never wanted to teach,” I interrupted him. “I was hoping there was a position for research and writing and that I would be able to do better work… but I just don’t think that it’s possible,” I murmured. “I already got a job offer from a different establishment which is closer to home with a job that I feel better equipped for.”

“I didn’t realize that you were unwilling to take a teaching position. But, there are no other positions open in the department,” he said.

“That’s alright, sir. I’m sure I’ll like my new job,” I said and smiled.

I walked out of there, less than enthused, to tell Dae that I hadn’t gotten the job. If it was not a teaching job, I would’ve taken it. I knew that I would be terrible at teaching. It just wasn’t in me to be patient with others. I wouldn’t be able to not say the things that shouldn’t be said. I didn’t want to be fired.

“So?” Dae asked me, as I left the office.

“Um… well, it was a teaching position,” I told him and he rolled his eyes.

“Why are you in a suit?” I asked him.

“I have to go meet the committee for the final interview in,” he checked his watch. “Seven and a half minutes.”

“And, when were you going to tell me?” I asked him.

“I forgot that I didn’t tell you. Will you come with me?” He