There couldn’t have been an uglier day. The sky was overcast and the wind was dead. Floral fragrances weren’t travelling through the air and so the late afternoon was nothing more than another depressing scene.

Sungmin couldn’t even understand why he was wandering around on such a pathetic day. There were other places he could’ve been, like maybe in his dorm room with Ryeowook. They could watch a movie on the laptop, or they could cuddle and talk about whatever. Or, Mir could join them and the trio could play a card game, maybe even reminisce about high school.

So why was he walking around alone outside?

It just felt like one of those moody days – the kind where all you want to do is write sad poetry and relish in the liberal or fine arts. Sungmin stopped, breathing in deeply and catching a slightly nostalgic scent.

He closed his eyes briefly, smiling and turning towards the smell. A snicker brought Sungmin back to the present and he stumbled back, flushing at the sight of Minho staring at him.

The handsome boy was muffling his laughs, arms crossed over chest. “What are you doing out here all alone?”

“I don’t know actually,” Sungmin replied seriously.

Minho stopped laughing, eyes sobering, “What’s going on?”

“Like I said,” he huffed in annoyance, kicking a pebble distractedly, “I don’t know.”

“Is it—?”

“—Sungmin!” Ryeowook’s voice sliced through the afternoon.

They turned around, seeing their friend running towards them. Ryeowook practically jumped on Sungmin, spinning around in the black haired boy’s arms. Minho chuckled, discreetly leaving the scene. It was never nice to disrupt a happy couple, even if you were in love with one half of that cute couple.

Sungmin smiled brightly, capturing his lover’s lips in a kiss. “Where have you been all day? I was bored without you…,” he mumbled.

“I wish I could’ve been with you earlier,” Ryeowook replied, “I really, really wish that.”

“Huh?” There was something strange about his tone. Sungmin considered brushing off the suspicions as him being moody, but then he caught Ryeowook’s eye and he knew it was more serious than being cute. “…Wookie?”

“Hey, hey, can we go for a walk?”

Sungmin hesitated, but then nodded, taking Ryeowook’s offered hand. Their fingers entwined out of habit and the overzealous boy led the way.

The campus grew more barren as they travelled into the park. It appeared that no one wanted to walk around outside on such a dreary day. Sungmin couldn’t blame them. Hell, he still didn’t know why he wanted to be outdoors. There wasn’t even much fresh air since everything was stagnant.

“How was your day?” Ryeowook asked.

“I guess it was normal,” he answered, “what about you? Did you miss me?”

The boy giggled with that same odd tone, “I miss you, Sungmin…I miss you a lot, actually.”

“Why are you using present tense?” he mumbled, pulling Ryeowook to a stop, the dread and anxiety getting the better of him. “What’s going on?”

Ryeowook’s smile faltered and he tried to nudge Sungmin to keep walking with him. “Can we go for a while longer? Please?” a hint of begging entered his voice, but it wasn’t working.

He shook his head, cupping Ryeowook’s face in his hands. “What are you talking about? Tell me why you’re acting so strange.”

“…I-I can’t be with you,” he admitted quietly.

Sungmin’s lips parted in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Please break up with me?” Ryeowook whimpered, eyes strained and wet.

“But…but I don’t know what’s going on,” he ran his fingers through Ryeowook’s hair, moving down to caress the nape of his neck, “why are you talking about breaking up?” Sungmin blinked several times, seeming to not realize what was happening. For him, that moment was far too surreal to even comprehend. It was like the aftermath of a dream, where you wonder whether or not everything is happening.

Ryeowook bit his bottom lip, refusing to say anything else.

“You won’t tell me?” Sungmin mumbled, large eyes slowly filling with hurt. “You want to break my heart without telling me why…?”

There was a small nod and then silent tears were falling down Ryeowook’s face.

Sungmin gently brushed his lips against one of the boy’s cheeks. “Is it because you don’t love me anymore?” he whispered, voice cracking.

This time, no response came.

“Yesterday, you said complicating love means there was never any love,” he said almost inaudibly, “so does that mean you just never loved me, Ryeowook?”

“That’s not it!” he exclaimed, breaking into sobs and jerking away from Sungmin. “I do love you, please just break up with me! I…I need to be with someone else so just say we’re over,” his voice failed at the end.

Sungmin suddenly clenched his fists, eyes hardening. “This is about Kyuhyun, isn’t it?” There was no answer. He glared bitterly at the crying boy. “It’s always about Kyuhyun.”

“…Break up with me,” Ryeowook repeated, swallowing his wails.

“Is this really how you want us to end?” Sungmin shouted, flinging his arm out angrily.

Ryeowook lowered his head, “…just break up with me already.”

“After everything we’ve done to get here, you’re telling me to break up with you? I’m just supposed to throw all of my feelings away because of Kyuhyun?!” Sungmin fought the urge to punch something, the grinding of his teeth one indication of the restraint. “Why do you care about him so much more than me?” he yelled. “Why am I always second to that ?! Who do you think has been here with you for so long? How come you can’t see that he’s poison?”

“Bye, Sungmin,” Ryeowook starting leaving, letting the words penetrate him and the tears pour down. It was the least he could do to ease the guilt…regret.

If Sungmin hated him, maybe everything would be better. Then they could move on and someday he would recover. He would find someone who didn’t put him in second place.

“…Why can’t you ever see me?” Sungmin swallowed the lump in his throat, refusing to let the stinging in his eyes become tears.

“WHY CAN’T YOU SEE ME, RYEOWOOK?! WHY CAN YOU ONLY SEE HIM?” He collapsed, hugging his knees and burying his face. “Dammit…,” the word drifted away as a wind picked up, killing the still silence.

Sungmin bit down hard enough to draw blood from his lip, “please don’t go…,” he mumbled, chest trembling, “why are you going…?”

***

Kyuhyun sat on the edge of his bed, mindlessly toying with a well-worn, folded piece of paper. The door clicked and he straightened, head shooting up to see Ryeowook coming inside, sniffling and smiling. “Hi Kyu,” he greeted warmly between uncomfortable breaths.

“You actually did it?” Kyuhyun spoke barely above a whisper, watching the boy come over and take his hands sweetly.

Ryeowook blinked back a few stray tears and nodded. “It’s okay,” he stated hoarsely, “let’s be together.”

“…You can’t change your mind,” he reminded, gazing up at his prospective lover, “I won’t let you change your mind.”

“I’m serious,” Ryeowook squeezed Kyuhyun’s hands, “for you, everything is okay.”

Kyuhyun couldn’t help but laugh, shoulders rising and falling. “Why is that your attitude towards this?” He let his expression calm before continuing. “Why are you letting everything go, just for me?”

The answer was quick and easy, nearly thoughtless, “Because you’re Kyuhyun.”

“That’s it?”

“Yeah,” Ryeowook smiled faintly, “because you’re the most important person in the world…to me, at least.”

Kyuhyun pulled the boy down into his lap, head resting against a lean chest. “Then you’re my most important person…forever.” He closed his eyes to the somber day, wondering if tomorrow they would be able to feel more than despair and regret.