“I don’t mind, really, but I still don’t understand how you need my help in studying. You do perfectly well on your own,” said Mingyu as they walked upstairs.

“I just need to put in extra effort. Mother’s been telling me to improve my grades so that I can get into the best universities easily,” Wonwoo answered without really meaning it.

Mingyu leaned against Wonwoo, so closely that the rim of his glasses hit Wonwoo's temple, and whispered, “I like your mom but she’s so strict!”

Wonwoo just hummed. He thought Mingyu was equally strict, only to himself though. Mingyu’s mother even complained to Wonwoo on how her son studied too much.

Next to him, Mingyu looked at ease. They'd never been that close to hang out together; they had different group of friends, different interests. But they weren't awkward. At least Mingyu didn't look awkward when Wonwoo asked him to study together out of the blue, and not right now as they were headed to Wonwoo's room. Hand on the door knob, Wonwoo wondered if Mingyu would stay not awkward after entering his room.

The door clicked and Wonwoo heard a small thud followed with a muffled "f--ouch!" When the door opened completely, he saw Minghao sitting behind a low table, left leg bent so that the knee was near his face. Minghao quickly put the leg down and resumed a cross-legged position while giving them a strained smile.

Wonwoo was about to walk further into the room when he felt himself being pulled by the arm and taken out to the corridor. After he wasn't being dragged anymore, he turned his body to face Mingyu.

"Why is he here?" Mingyu hissed. The eyes behind those square-rimmed glasses looked shocked, more than Wonwoo had imagined.

"He said he's having trouble studying too, so I invited him," said Wonwoo casually, feigning innocence.

"What? Why does he care--How do you even know him?"

"...we go to same school."

”Yes, but--"

"Is there a problem?"

"I--"

For a while Mingyu opened and closed his mouth without letting out any sound. Maybe he's conflicted on whether to tell Wonwoo about the library incident. Wonwoo couldn't bring himself to feel guilty. Having a not-so-close relationship gave him that benefit.

Mingyu finally said something, it was a small no for Wonwoo's previous question. Then he obediently followed Wonwoo back into the room, albeit with stiff shoulders that tensed up even more when he plopped down on the cushion between Wonwoo and Minghao.

The study session started quietly. They decided to work on a set of questions first before discussing them. The peacefulness fell apart when Minghao only got one right out of ten and Mingyu tried to help him solve the other nine. It was a painful process to see.

"No, Minghao, you forgot the basic formula from earlier!"

Mingyu pointed to the notebook on the table angrily with his pen. He seemed to forget all his awkwardness. The gap between him and Minghao that he so adamantly kept during the beginning was gone as their shoulders were now touching. He was probably too occupied with his frustration towards Minghao that he had failed to notice.

"There are so many of them!"

Minghao also seemed to be consumed with frustration. He was all smiles earlier, humming as he worked on the questions while stealing glances at Mingyu. Yet now he was glaring at Mingyu like he so brazenly did toward Mr. Kang.

"Well yeah. You need them all to get through second year. And this one!! You don't apply it like that. Why don't you get it?"

"Maybe it's because you're such a bad teacher!"

Mingyu opened his mouth to retaliate, but for some reason he closed it again and turned to the notebook. His forehead creased and lips pulled into a tight line. Meanwhile Minghao glanced at Wonwoo, sending him some kind of message with his panicked eyes. Wonwoo had no idea on what to do in this kind of situation so he just shrugged.

Minghao's eyes bulged and he looked as if he's going to leaped over the table and pounce on Wonwoo, but then Mingyu spoke up.

''How about this?"

He tapped his pen at the notebook and Minghao scooted closer. Mingyu scribbled on the notebook as he explained how to solve the problems again, in a different way this time. Minghao started to understand better and looked more relaxed. Frustration also started to disappear from Mingyu's face. He stopped snapping when Minghao said he didn't get it, only furrowing his eyebrows while he asked which part Minghao didn't understand.

"That's it! You got it!" Mingyu's face lit up as he exclaimed. "I'll make you a few more questions to make sure you got it, okay?" He scrambled his pen on the notebook, glint on his eyes and smile on his lips.

Minghao stared at Mingyu for a while as if he was stunned. The muscles in his face visibly relaxed as he gazed at Mingyu, fondness overflowing from his eyes.

Wonwoo felt his own lips curving up.

“Wonwoo, you’re having lunch, right?”

The voice made Wonwoo’s heart skipped a beat. It always did. But only for a moment. When he lifted his face to see his classmate Jun, everything was back to normal.

Or so he convinced himself.

“Yeah.”

Jun responded with a smile before turning around and catching up with Seokmin and Hansol who were already at the door of the class. Wonwoo’s heart missed another beat again. It’s starting to get pretty tiring. Draining all the stamina he didn’t have.

At the cafeteria, Wonwoo sat next to Jun while Seokmin and Hansol were across them. They had lunch while chatting as usual, until Minghao walked from across the room, bag hanging from his shoulder, and took a seat next to Seokmin.

Minghao seemed oblivious to the surprised look from Wonwoo’s friends, or maybe he just decided to ignore it. He didn’t even bother to acknowledge them and immediately spoke to Wonwoo, eyes sparkling with excitement.

“When is the next study session?”

“I haven’t asked Mingyu yet, but he did mention having student council meeting on Wednesday. I’ll ask him if he’s available on Thursday.”

“Jeon Wonwoo—“ Minghao suddenly stood up from his seat—making Seokmin flinched and scooted closer to Hansol—then leaned over the table to shake Wonwoo’s shoulder. “I owe you big time,” he said with a grin.

Minghao went back to his seat with a satisfied smile while next to him, Seokmin was looking at Wonwoo with his eyes almost popping out from the sockets.

“Oh, right. Minghao, these are my classmates. Seokmin, Hansol, Jun. Guys, this is—“

“They know me. Kang sure have told them about his favorite student.”

“Right.” Wonwoo gave up on Minghao’s introduction and continued with his lunch. Hansol did too with jovial smile, while Seokmin seemed at edge. It’s like he couldn’t decide whether to pretend Minghao’s not sitting next to him or stare at Minghao. Seokmin looked scared yet intrigued at the same time.

Meanwhile Jun looked at Minghao with his ever gentle gaze. Wonwoo felt the urge to peek inside Jun’s head, he somehow wanted to know what Jun was thinking. Jun’s eyes were patient, as if waiting for Minghao to notice him. Eventually Minghao did.

“Is there anything?” Minghao said, eyes looking straight at Jun.

“Oh, I was wondering, since you’re here why don’t you have lunch too?” Jun said with a small smile, dimples attached.

Minghao just looked at him for a moment before saying “sure”. He stayed in his seat and grab his sling bag, producing a pack of bread from it.

“Why are you bringing your bag around?” asked Hansol, amusement obvious from his face.

Minghao bit on his bread and answered between his chews. “Gonna skip after this.”

Hansol’s eyes sparkled at his answer. “Do you have some kind of secret passage out of school?”

Minghao chuckled. “Maybe.” Hansol looked impressed while Minghao flaunted a smug. Wonwoo just shook his head.

Lunch with Minghao surprisingly went okay. Minghao didn’t talk much, but he responded when asked to. Then the topic became about when they’re going to watch the new action movie in the theater.

“Oh, come on, Jun. Just skip for once. You have marching band practice every day,” Seokmin whined.

“Not on weekends,” said Jun with pleading eyes.

“But movies are expensive on weekends!”

“I’m sorry... You guys just watch without me, please.”

“No!”

Seokmin swayed his body side to side like a child throwing tantrum. He hit the table in the process, making Jun’s opened water bottle toppled to the side and spilled its contents on Wonwoo’s lap.

Seokmin kept apologizing to him and Wonwoo had to tell him repeatedly that it’s fine. So Wonwoo didn’t notice until Jun already had a handkerchief in his hand and wiping Wonwoo’s trousers with it.

“Jun, it’s fine.” Wonwoo said quickly. But Jun insisted. He kept his head down and wiped his handkerchief over Wonwoo’s left thigh. Wonwoo felt as if someone just the heater in the cafeteria.

Giving up on making Jun stop, he tried to look anywhere but Jun staring on his lap. His eyes caught Minghao’s and the latter gave him a smirk. Wonwoo sighed.

Wonwoo had arrived before the practice started. He settled in his usual place under the tree and just stared at the field. He heard footsteps coming towards him, just right before they were erased by the roaring sound of melodies from the field below.

“You won’t see Jun from here. Too far.”

Wonwoo didn’t bother to turn. He knew the teasing voice belonged to Minghao.

“I’m not looking for him.”

“Yeah, sure.” Minghao sounded amused, like he was just being tickled and liked it.

After that there was only the sound of brass and percussion. Wonwoo let himself get immersed in it, at times closing his eyes. Behind his closed eyes, the sight of the marching band formation he just saw mixed with the one in his memory.

His little brother managed to get their whole family to watch a high school baseball game at the stadium. It was packed with sweat and noise more than Wonwoo would usually like it, but he felt oddly comfortable. There’s this kind of feeling in the air, something that got his skin crawling. Weird yet highly addictive.

The time he felt it the most was during the break. One of the teams’ supporter took out their marching band to the field. He heard the first blow of the trumpet and in that exact moment, that something grew a hundred times more intense.

Just like that, Wonwoo went hopping around between what happened in the field and what occurred in his head, until the ending tune filled the air and Wonwoo completely came back to reality. He turned his head to his left. Minghao was still there, looking back at him with... nothing. No teasing, no question.  Neither judgement nor expectation. Wonwoo couldn’t remember the last time someone had looked at him like that.

“You really like the marching band.” Minghao said quietly. It wasn’t a question.

Wonwoo didn’t respond and so Minghao continued.

“Ever thought of joining?”

Wonwoo looked back at the field and said, “It’s no longer recruitment period. Mom wouldn’t approve anyway.”

He heard Minghao’s “I see”. Just like Minghao’s gaze, the voice was free from things like judgement. It made Wonwoo’s skin crawling. It was different from the sensation he felt when watching marching band. This one is burning, making him feel that he had to do something about it.

“Oh!”

Suddenly Minghao exclaimed, taking Wonwoo’s attention away from his thoughts.

“It’s time for Mingyu to finish the meeting!”

“And what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to walk home together with him.”

“...Did you ask him before about this?”

“Nope.”

“Okay...”

“Gotta go! See ya!” With that and one last grin, Minghao was gone. Wonwoo stayed for a while, mind going through all the questions in his head. When he left school and arrived at cram school later, he found that he didn’t answer a single one of them.

Just a few steps into the school gate, Wonwoo felt something hit his left arm. Thankfully he had good reflex; the hit made his body tilted to the side but failed to knock him to the ground.

It was Minghao, swaying his sling bag with a mischievous grin, looking jovial for someone who usually hated stepping foot into the school ground. Around them the other students did their best to look away despite the evident curiosity on their faces. Some walked by in fast pace, almost running. Probably thinking they would’ve gotten hit with the sling bag too if they had been too close.

Wonwoo and Minghao walked side by side towards the school building. On the way, Wonwoo saw Mingyu almost reaching the entrance door with two other male students. It seemed that Minghao noticed too as he let out a loud “Mingyu!” and waved enthusiastically.

Meanwhile Mingyu visibly jumped at his position. He only gave a short glance towards their direction before rushing his two friends, who looked surprised, inside the building.

Minghao didn’t stop waving even after Mingyu’s back was gone behind the wave of students going through the door, a fond smile on his face.

“You walked home with him yesterday?”

“Kinda.”

“Kinda.”

“We ran.”

“Huh?”

“He just ran when I approached him so I chased him.”

Wonwoo was surprised. Not because of what Minghao said, but because of how the words didn’t come as unexpected to Wonwoo.

“Okay.”

“Then he fell when we passed the riverbed. That clumsy giant.” Minghao chuckled. It made Wonwoo smile.

“He didn’t get up for a long time, I thought he passed out of something. Turns out he’s just tired from all the running and just decided to lie down.” Minghao shook his head. Then a smile graced his face as he said, “We ended up sitting there for, I don’t know, an hour maybe. Just, sit and talk a bit. Hah. He’s starting to get that there’s no use in resisting my charm.” The smile wasn’t his usual smug grin, it was somewhat bashful and there was notable blush on his cheeks.

“That’s good, Minghao.” Wonwoo meant it. He thought he’d never felt this glad, not even towards the things that happened to himself. He felt even better when Minghao turned to face him and showed his widest smile.

Wonwoo felt somewhat mesmerized and let out the first thing that came through his mind.

“You’re incredible.”

The words came out from his own mouth, yet Wonwoo felt strange. It was rare for him to just let out whatever went through his head.

Minghao had this look that made Wonwoo more convinced that he was being weird.

“What?”

“I mean it. You stand up for yourself and strive to get what you want.”

Even after they were out from his lips, the words stayed in his mind and consumed Wonwoo from the inside. They reminded him of everything he was not, sweeping him with a wave of frustration.

It seemed the words had affected Minghao more. He showed Wonwoo a face that Wonwoo had never seen before. It was somehow similar to Mother’s face when Wonwoo got a C for physics that one time in junior high school. Or maybe his brother’s when he kept failing on playing a piece with the piano and their mother wouldn’t let him stop practicing. Maybe both? Wonwoo wasn’t sure. But the look didn’t seem to be intended towards Wonwoo.

“I'm just a coward,” he said with a sad smile. Wonwoo was so stunned that it took him a while to realize the sadness that crept inside his own chest.

It was like a scene in one of those dramas his family watched every day, Wonwoo could almost hear the romantic BGM. At this moment, Wonwoo thought that he could finally understand how the protagonists in those dramas felt when they stared in awe at the other main lead.

From where he stood on his classroom door, he could see Jun sitting at the second row next to a series of windows that separated the room with the world outside. Jun had his face tilted towards the windows, head swaying to the sides as his lips moved to hum something Wonwoo couldn’t hear. He seemed absorbed in his own world, not even reacting when Wonwoo opened the door earlier.

The sight made Wonwoo recall the thought that had been bugging him these days. What was it with high school? He had been living quite the uneventful life and didn’t expect it to be any different when he entered high school. Now he was in his second year and look what’s happening: Getting interested in a club that involves a lot physical work. Hanging out with the school’s number one delinquent. Jun.

Then, just like in the dramas, the world moved in slow motion when Jun turned his face away from the window. With each agonizingly slow second, Wonwoo’s heart beat rapidly until it’s impossible to get any faster.

“Wonwoo.”

After pronouncing his name, those lips curved up into a smile. It might be Wonwoo’s favorite smile after—

Minghao.

There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach as he thought of Minghao and his sad smile this morning.

“Wonwoo?”

Jun’s voice pulled him back to reality and he remembered what he was about to do. He walked to the seat in front of Jun’s, sitting down with his chest sticking to the back of the chair. His heart beat increased again, but now it’s for a different reason.

“Is the marching band still accepting application?”