Though I live among people, I long for the human scent. I’m comfortable when I’m alone but loneliness hurts me. I know the things of the world but I don’t know many things. I want to live without thinking but all these thoughts pass through my head. At times like this, I need you. [...] 

I can laugh loudly at jokes that aren’t that funny. Instead of saying a lot, I just drink. Even if I’ll be miserable at dawn. [...] 

I need you even now. Your hands that silently hold my shoulder. That always help me breathe. 
It makes me live, we need love

>> Lyrics by Zito of Souldive, song "Friends" on the album Teenager by Jung Joon Young. 

The date for his return was set. His bags were packed. He'd spent the last days of his forced freedom visiting friends in Europe. He loved London and bought to many things while staying there. He also went to get a new haircut. His friends joked that only women do that when they wanted to show a change. Mostly after a relationship ended or something. Well, it was a bit similar for him. He liked his new style. That was most important, wasn't it? 

Returning, there were many things he was worried about and many things he was looking forward to. 

He was looking forward to see how his friends, fans and the haters and the whole audience would react to him. He had changed so much in such a short time. He still was in the middle of the process. He would change some more. He felt that he had changed fo the better though. Of course, hard times make you stronger, they teach you what's most important in life. Like friends and family. They are the people who really hold things together in the end. The people you grab, the people who hold you, the people you go to, when you feel like you're suffocating. 

He realized that he didn't pay enough attention to this people. That he acctually took them for granted and that his priorities where wrong all along. It was on him now, not to forget this and to care for them. 

He realized that it didn't make him happy to be a cool guy but it felt gorgeous to be a good guy. Somehow it was selfish because it was doing good for ones own sake, to feel better. But that didn't change the fact that it made him a good person. It makes you a good person to feel good about beeing good, doesn't it? His own complicated thoughts made him smile.

There was still a wound. He had to learn how to live with it. It was not something to disapear compleatly. He did learn that people around him were more important than he thought but he had been hurt by one of them. Trust would be difficult. Maybe it would make him a lonly person. And loneliness was one of the things he feared the most. 

Maybe it would be hard to let someone in again. But he'd get over it. He'd go on. He wouldn't be too hard on himself, he would take care of himself. He wouldn't hate himself anymore even if he'd fall he would get up and know that life goes on and he had to hold on and it would get better.

It was an endless circle, a windmill of loving, smiling, hurting and then crying and while crying, you'd feel love again because of the people who support you.

Because that's what life is.