RIP i don't know how to title properly 

========================================================================================================

Sometimes, Youngbin thinks it was a mistake that he got really close to Dawon during their trainee days but at the same time, he couldn't imagine how his life would be without the younger guy in it. They are best friends, that's what he keeps on telling himself but he knew that that was a lie. Still, he couldn't find it in himself to acknowledge what he's really feeling because it's wrong - as the leader of the group, he have to maintain a professional relationship with everyone and as Dawon's best friend, well, he has to act as a best friend. 

So really, the only way he can openly show this growing affection to the younger guy is when they are in front of the cameras. He can hug and kiss him on the cheek - much to the glee of the fans - and no one would suspect a thing. 

But there are times that Dawon unknowingly tests Youngbin's self-control and this is one of those times. 

They were booked for a Halloween themed pictorial for Naver and everyone is pretty excited because they'll be dressed up in costumes and would be shooting in an old carnival. Although they were on the road during the wee hours of the morning, everyone's spirits were high. 

Youngbin was just starting to get his make up done when Dawon entered the make shift tent in full make-up and costume. 

"Hyung, what do you think?" Dawon asked as he twirled slowly. 

"You look amazing," Youngbin breathed. 

And he really does, with that blue jacket and the red bow tie and the black rimmed glasses and the slight pink tint on his lips. Youngbin closed his eyes and breathed deeply, stopping his train of thought from going any further.  

When he opened his eyes, he found Dawon staring at him intensely that he felt like the other guy could read his thoughts. "You look really great," Youngbin repeated with a smile. 

Thankfully, the makeup noona told him to close his eyes as she started to work on his eye make up.

The photoshoot ended without a hitch and Youngbin was pretty sure that he got through it well. He may have been staring a little too intently when Dawon was doing his individual shoot but he can always say he was just monitoring him. 

Before they knew it, they were back in the company, shooting a practice MV in costume for Halloween.

Towards the end, Youngbin stepped behind Dawon placing one hand on the younger one's waist. Dawon looked at him quizzically but Youngbin just smiled and then their manager yelled Cut!

Youngbin immediately stepped away, removing his hand and patting Dawon on the shoulder instead, "Good job guys," he said to the room.

There was a flurry of activity as everyone started to exit the room, their voices fading slowly into nothingness. Youngbin hung back with their manager, wanting to check the videos they just filmed. Youngbin left the practice room after a few minutes and was on his way up when, 

"Hyung," 

"Yah! Lee Dawon, you scared me!" Youngbin exclaimed clutching his chest as Dawon stepped out from the corner of the hallway. 

"What's wrong?" Youngbin asked. He was suddenly so aware of the narrow, empty hallway that they were standing in. 

"Why do you do that?" Dawon asked, expression unreadable. 

"Do what? I don't get you?" 

"When we're in front of the cameras, you get all touchy and yet as soon as the cameras are off, you start to act cold towards me," Dawon answered. 

"I don't act cold towards you," Youngbin scoffed. He tried to step away but Dawon blocked him. 

"But you do, hyung... Sometimes when I approach you or even slightly touch you, you flinch or you stiffen and I'm just confused coz you're the one person I'm closest to here and I'm wondering if I did something wrong to offend you or something and I ju-" 

Youngbin didn't know what came over him, he found himself pushing Dawon on to the wall and planting a kiss on his lips. 

"I-I"m sorry," he said afterward, realizing what he had done. "I'm sorry.. please forget this happened," he said quickly and ran upstairs.