I am now sitting on the front steps of my house, avoiding the confrontation that will present itself as soon as I walk in. With a sigh I stand up and turn towards the door. I close my eyes, tuck my phone into my back pocket, and then reach for the door handle. Even though I feel like air, I manage to latch onto the handle. Turning it slowly, I open the door and walk in.

“Where the hell have you been?”

“I just got home a little late mom. I stayed after to talk with a teacher.”

“Oh I bet!” She yells from her bedroom.

“Mom I’m seri-”

“Whatever. Just go and get started on dinner. I have to get ready for work.”  

“Yes ma’am.” I sigh, knowing that it’s no use to argue with her.

I walk to the kitchen, dropping my stuff in a corner, on the linoleum tiled floor. I turn on the faucet and wait until the steam rises up to plant foggy kisses on my glasses. With a deep breath, I stick my hands under the water. It is scalding, but this is the only way you can tell that you’re still alive. That you’re not air, you’re just see through, and that there is a difference between the two. Ever since dad died from overdosing on Oxy, it’s just been you and mom. She works non-stop as an ER nurse at a hospital a couple towns over.   While you, on the other hand, don’t get paid for your diligence… Or for gossiping. You work hard, extremely hard, and she doesn’t appreciate it, never has, never will. Everytime she yells just smile, bow as an apology, and do as you’re told. Moments like these, they are the things that make your friends important. I scoff lightly and shake my head as I snap the lock on the cage of my subconscious and escape. I turn on the cold water and wash my hands properly.

“The food better be done in twenty minutes or it’s gonna be your !” I try to pretend that she is yelling out praises instead. I walk over to the refrigerator, grabbing the ingredients for chicken caesar salad.

I finish plating the food as she walks into the kitchen. She glances at the plate with complete and utter disgust.

“Salad again? This will be day two.”

“Yes ma’am. I’m sorry.”

“You’re always sorry but you never change... I’ll just get food on the way to work.” She says with distaste.

She walks to the table and grabs her bag, which I packed, and walks out the door muttering about how dumb I am. I bow as she leaves and stay that way until the door is shut and I’m sure she’s in her car. I stand upright and reach for my back pocket. At the same time my first finger touches the top of my phone it buzzes.

It’s like he just knows

I smile and grab it already knowing whose face is going to be on my screen. Taehyung. I quickly pick up.

“JAGIYAAAA!” He screams as I pull the phone away from my ear and laugh.

“TAE-TAE!” I yell in reply.

“I’m coming over.”

“You can’t Tae, I have a crap ton of homework.”

“Jagiya, I’m already on your doorstep.”

I exhale deeply, “You aren’t alone are you?” I say with suspicion.

He chuckles sheepishly before a new voice screams hello, and follows itself with a vigorous ringing of my doorbell. I walk over to the door and throw it open.

“HOBI! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!” I exclaim as I step out of my home and knock his hand away from the doorbell. He laughs heartily causing me to grin despite my best efforts to look tough.

“We wore all black, even our backpacks,  so we wouldn’t get caught coming over and stuff.” V says in a whisper. I roll my eyes.

“You do realise that it is only just now six o’clock right?”

“I tried to tell him,” Hobi replies shrugging.

“Just get inside. I have food for you guys.”

Just like kids excited about opening presents on Christmas morning, the boys dash through the door, whip around the corner that separates the living room and the kitchen, all to end up throwing their bags on the floor and themselves down into the chairs at the kitchen table. I trail behind them at a comparably slower rate. When I reach the kitchen a few seconds later they are looking at me expectantly with wide eyes. I walk over to the counter and grab a plate and quickly make their food. I spin around and walk to the table.

“Tonight’s dish is chicken caesar salad.”  I explain as I sit the plates down on the table. They look at me as if I have placed the meaning of life on the plate in front of them. V begins shoveling food into his mouth, but J-Hope looks at me sadly.

“Again?” he questions with a sorrowful tone. I only nod in response.

“You can come stay with us, ya know?”

“I know Hobi, but I can’t leave her after dad just left.” I answer.

“But he didn’t just leave jagiya. It’s been months and she is verbally abusive.”

“I know that Hobi, but I can’t.” I reply, my voice cracking. He pushes his chair back from the table and stands up. He walks over to me, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist.

“What is it with you loving people that only hurt you jagi?” I don’t reply, I just bury my head into his neck. We stay like this for 5 minutes before V notices.

“What are you guys doing? Hobi if you aren’t gonna eat this can I? It’s so good!”

Hobi removes his hands from around me and shoots Taehyung a look.

“No you can’t freaking eat my food Alien.” J-Hope mutters with disapproval.

I rub my eyes and giggle.

“Of course you’d be so oblivious Tae!” I quip still giggling. This causes Taehyung to pout.

“Jagiya, I almost forgot why we came over!” Tae exclaims, as I look at him expectantly.

“We need help with our Language Arts homework.” Hoseok says sheepishly scratching the back of his head before glancing over at the backpacks on the floor, which had been completely forgotten. I switch my ‘You can’t be serious’ look back and forth between the two of them. V is smiling widely while Hoseok returns to his seat and begins shoveling food into his mouth to avoid eye contact. After a couple moments of staring at V’s adorable grin and Hobi’s avoiding eyes, I sigh.

“Fine losers… Follow me.” I roll my eyes and lead them to the last door at the end of the hallway. It is a black door that I painted myself. In the center is a small, wilting, and fragile yellow rose. It’s yellow is now more of a brown, but on the day of my father’s funeral, it was bright and lively. It reminded me of him so I kept it. I knew they were staring at it and missing him as much as I was, so I opened the door.   

“Noona,” Taehyung whined, dragging out the ‘a’ at the end, “this is so boring! Fix it!”

“Tae we have only been working for half an hour. We are literally not even halfway done.”

The two boys groan in discontent.

“How about this,” I suggest, “I will show you guys the different dances I’m learning after we complete every assignment?”

V and J-Hope look at each other, their eyes filled with utter excitement and giddiness.

“DEAL!” They yell in unison. I mentally punch myself for offering the revealing of me dancing. Then I punch myself harder as I remember that J-Hope is in a dance group and is known around the school for being one of, if not the best dancer there. With the new sense of motivation it seems as though we fly through the ten pages of reading, four worksheets, and the 2,000 word essay. Not to mention, the twelve math problems and five science questions assigned.

“Alright boys! Let’s pick up our stuff and are you guys spending the night?”