“That's enough for today. Clearly some of you need a break to collect yourselves. It's late so don't stay up. Get good rest because I expect better tomorrow.” Their choreographer stated, making sure to give a short glance at Jimin while he was speaking, then proceeded to leave the room. After a couple hours’ worth of practice, he cut their practice short after seeing how one member in particular continued to struggle throughout the entire lesson.

The group was preparing for their next comeback, which meant plenty of new dance routines to memorize. While everyone was excited to present their fans with new material, it wasn't always smooth sailing during preparations. Stress was always very high during this time, which meant the boys all had short fuses and had to tread carefully around each other, not wanting to add onto each other's burdens.

With the choreographer cutting their practice short, it meant a delay in the progress of their comeback preparations. They were meant to learn the entire dance today, but with Jimin constantly struggling throughout the lesson, the choreographer could barely get them through the first part. All the members were slightly irritated, some more than others, but none more so than their golden maknae.

Feeling really bad and wanting to break the silence, Jimin looked at all the members with an apologetic glance and started to speak. “Sorry guys, I've been on my new diet for the comeback and I guess I'm not--”

“Jimin, just shut up.” Interrupting Jimin and reaching the peak of his frustration, Jungkook did not want to hear whatever excuses Jimin could come up with. He noticed the flash of hurt that crossed Jimin’s face, but at this point he was too frustrated to give it a second thought.

“Kookie you brat! I'm still your hyung, show some respect.” Jimin tried to scold playfully, hoping he could brighten the maknae’s mood.

“Yeah well you don't deserve to be called hyung. If you did, you wouldn't be holding us back like this.”

“Kook, I--” At this point, Jimin was on the verge of tears, but Jungkook, far too heated in his ranting, continued regardless.

“Look, I don't really care what your excuse is. If you're gonna bring up your diet, then I don't wanna hear it. If you cared enough about the group you would've never let yourself gain weight in the first place. All you ever do is hold us back. Hoseok hyung dances better than you and me & Tae hyung sing better than you. Bangtan doesn't even need you. In facat, we’d even be better off without you. I wish you were never even in our group.”

With that, Jungkook stormed out of the practice room, failing to notice Jimin breaking down in tears and ignoring his other hyungs who looked at him in shock. Following the choreographer’s orders, Jungkook headed straight back to their dorms.

On his walk back, he was able to cool down a little and thought back to his previous argument with his shorter(and secretly his favorite) hyung. Guilt immediately coursed throughout his body and he knew he took things too far. After what he did, could he even call his Jimin hyung his favorite? With his display earlier, no one would think that Jungkook even liked Jimin, much less think he was his favorite.

‘I was only frustrated because of our upcoming comeback.’ Jungkook repeated the thought in his head like a mantra, hoping the excuse would help alleviate some of the guilt. Despite what he tried, he knew it was hopeless. He had hurt his precious hyung and what he did was unforgivable.

He thought back to all the memories he shared with Jimin, from the moment they met until now. Even back when they were trainees and Jungkook was still an awkward teenager lost in the world, Jimin was always there to help him get it together when he could not do so himself. While his other members had also been good role models, it was different with Jimin. For Jungkook, Jimin was like his personal Iron Man, his super hero and idol in real life.

-

The older boy, despite being friendly with everyone, paid special attention to Jungkook. From words of encouragement to a shoulder to lean on, or maybe even something as small as buying Jungkook a treat, Jimin always knew what he needed and never made a fuss about it. They weren’t always the biggest things, but these actions added up. Jimin loved to dote on him, and while Jungkook may have pushed his advances back in embarrassment(he wasn't used to receiving such kindness from others), he was always grateful for the extra love he couldn’t get from his family who was all the way back in Busan and he knew that Jimin knew that. There was this special intimacy between them, and in return Jimin shared with him his own vulnerability. It was a side of Jimin that was meant for Jungkook and only Jungkook. It was for reasons like these that he loved his hyung most.

It was after debut when things suddenly changed. Gone was his Jimin who he shared intimate moments with, his Jimin who he had shared personal world with just the two of them. Instead, he was replaced with a Jimin who was loud and overbearing, sharing his love for Jungkook to the entire world(something that should have only been for Jungkook). To make things worse, rather than coming to Jungkook when he had a hard time adjusting to their new lives as idols, Jimin found solace in Yoongi and Taehyung. Of course, he didn't want to be possessive-after all they weren't the only members of the group-but it was always either those two or rarely, one of the other members. What upset Jungkook was that Jimin neverwent to him. After all this, Jungkook couldn’t help but feel hurt and betrayed. Did all their special moments together as trainees mean nothing to him? If distancing himself from Jungkook was what Jimin wanted, then Jungkook was going to do the same. Ignoring the hollow feeling growing inside of himself, Jungkook began to change how he acted around his hyung as well. In front of the camera, his rejections would become colder, losing its playful undertones, and he would take every opportunity he could to embarrass Jimin the same way he embarrassed Jungkook.

He’d be lying to himself and to anyone around him if he said that humiliating his hyung like that made him feel any better. If anything, it made him feel even worse. Not only did he hurt his hyung, but also he pushed him even further away from him. At the time, he thought that it was for the better, but eventually he realized that it just made everything that much worse. He realized that all those dreams and aspirations that he and Jimin had envisioned together when they were trainees really meant nothing if he couldn’t accomplish it with his hyung by his side.

Their relationship continued to crumble until it was to the point where it was affecting the whole group’s dynamic, and the other members could no longer ignore it in hopes the two would confront their issues themselves. Eventually Jin and Yoongi, as the two oldest members, approached both Jimin and Jungkook individually, and basically gave the two of them the ultimatum of either fixing their problems or risk their(both the group and their individual) careers. Of course for both of them, Bangtan came first. Losing their pride(mainly Jungkook’s) for the sake of their group was the most important thing for the both of them. Unknown to each other, they both missed each other dearly, but they(Jungkook) would never admit it, there was only so much pride they could lose.

“Hey Kook” “Hyung, I--” The two began to speak, only stopping when they realized that they were both speaking over each other.

“Sorry Kookie, you can go first.” Jimin started softly; he had his own thoughts but he didn’t want to mess up rebuilding this friendship. Little did Jungkook know, he still held the biggest spot in his hyung’s heart, regardless of how much time he spent with Yoongi & Taehyung, and the lack he spent with Jungkook himself.

“No, please go first, you’re the hyung.” Truthfully, as eager as he was to renew his friendship with his hyung, Jungkook didn’t have the slightest clue as to where to start.

“Listen Kookie, why don’t we just start over? Let’s just leave whatever split us apart in the past okay? The past is just past, let’s just forget what happened and move on toward the future. It doesn’t matter to me why it happened, really! I… I miss you, and it’s for the good of the group. What do you think?” The way Jimin looked at Jungkook, and only Jungkook, when he said that, with such an earnest look in his eye, it was something that he had missed for so long. Something that he tried burying deep down with the rest of his feelings.

Here Jimin was, offering an easy way out of all their problems, and Jungkook was too much of a coward to say no and properly fix everything.

“Yeah, let’s do it. Forget everything, that sounds great.”

Since that conversation, a lot of the tension between them had dissipated, and things were almost like they used to be. The two would playfully banter with each other and spend time together alone, but it was never really the same. As much as Jungkook tried, he could always feel that invisible wall between the two of them that prevented things from going back to the way things were. Jimin didn’t seem to notice anything, but then again Jimin was always a much better actor than he ever was. Their time together lacked the vulnerability and intimacy that the two had previously had. It took a while for Jungkook to figure it out, but he eventually realized that it was because of the lack of trust between the two of them. The two of them were dancing around each other’s true thoughts, always keeping their conversations light. On the rare occasion things got serious, it was never about their relationship with each other. Since his discovery, Jungkook’s done nothing about it; he was still too much of a coward to change the sense of comfortability that the two had now. He didn’t have to courage to confront Jimin and properly talk about their falling apart and clear up all their misunderstandings. He would rather find solace in this false sense of peace than risk the chance of destroying whatever remained of their once indestructible friendship. He was a coward then, he was still a coward now.

His only regret, both now and then, was that he was never able to truly express how grateful he actually was for everything Jimin’s done for him. In fact all he seemed to be good at is exposing all of Jimin’s shortcomings and making Jimin feel worse about himself, especially after his outburst back in the practice room. It’s his fault they fell apart in the first place, and it’s his fault that they never truly fixed things. If he had confronted Jimin rather than hurting him, maybe things would have never reached this point. He was given a second chance when he and Jimin were fixing things, but he also blew that off by taking the easy way out offered to him.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he reached the door to their dorm. Obviously, nobody was home. They were most likely comforting Jimin, and probably thinking of ways to deal with his own behavior. He quickly walked inside and headed toward his room. After switching out of his clothes he wore for practice, he quickly changed into his nightwear and laid down, too exhausted to properly clean himself up. With the stress of the comeback and everything with Jimin, Jungkook was exhausted. He knew he had a lot of fixing to do, but he was too tired to even think straight.

‘Everything will be ok. I’ll fix everything tomorrow.’ With that as his final thoughts, he quickly fell asleep, awaiting what was to come the next day.

-

“Jungkook! Hey, maknae! Wake up!!!!”

Hearing a deep voice yelling, Jungkook was being dragged out of his slumber, forcing him to return to reality. Rubbing his eyes, he looked up to a see a boxy grin, immediately recognizing one of Taehyung hyung’s signature features.

“Jungkook! Yay, you’re finally awake! Jin hyung would’ve killed you if you slept any longer, you’ve slept in late as it is. Come on it’s time to start the day! Long day ahead of us, comeback season and all. I’ve never had so many lines before it’s stressful actually. Is this how you always feel?” Taehyung started rambling, talking so fast that Jungkook could barely understand half the things he said, still only half awake.

“Hyung slow down, I just woke up.” Jungkook replied. What he could pick up on though from his half awake state was Taehyung’s bright and bubbly mood. Why was he so happy, especially with Jungkook? Usually whenever he upset Jimin in the slightest, Taehyung would be the first one on his tail. Did he forget what happened last night?

Taehyung jumped off the bed with Jungkook’s hand in tow, dragging the younger out of his room. “Well you better hurry and wake yourself up, because Jin hyung is not gonna be happy if you stay in bed any longer. You know how he gets when we don’t listen to him, I’d rather not get on his bad side. I actually want to have breakfast today thank you very much, now let’s go!”

“Tae, calm down, you know Jin hyung would never get mad at you. He loves you too much.” Jungkook said, pulling back his hand from his hyung’s grasp.

Rather than blushing in embarrassment like he thought Tae would, Taehyung just frowned and gave Jungkook a weird look, later breaking into a smile. “Good joke Kook, you almost sounded serious there for a second hah!”

‘Well that was weird.’ Jungkook thought, but he didn’t really give it much thought. “I wasn’t joking though? Whatever that’s not really important right now, have you seen Jimin? I still have to apologize for last night.”

Things got even weirder with Taehyung’s response. “Jimin? Which Jimin are you talking about?”

“Hyung are you serious? What other Jimin do I talk to? Park Jimin!” If this was some kind of game that Taehyung was playing, Jungkook wasn’t amused. He loved to play with Taehyung but now was clearly not the time.

Taehyung just raised a brow at him, giving him a weird look. “Park Jimin from 15&? I didn’t even know you two knew each other. Thanks for telling me Jungkook, I thought we told each other everything, what happened to being bffs for life? Is she who you were with last night? No offense but I always thought you were gay.”

At this point Jungkook was getting a little peeved, how could he joke about something like this when he probably broke his hyung’s heart the night before? “Hyung are you seriously trying to joke around at a time like this? I’m talking about the Park Jimin from our group. Our hyung! Your best friend? Did you forget what I did?”

Taehyung just stared at him for a good while and frowned. After a moment of silence, he placed the back of his hand against Jungkook’s forehead. “Kook, are you feeling okay? If you told me you were feeling under the weather then it would’ve been a completely different! Jin hyung would’ve definitely let you sleep in longer. You didn’t have to make up some silly stories. First you bring up some nonsense about Jin hyung loving me and now all this nonsense about Jimin?”

“Tae, what are you even talking about?” Nothing about what Taehyung had just told him had made any sense to him.

“Jungkook, you’re a little bit out of it aren’t you? Assuming we’re talking about the same Jimin, he’s not in Bangtan remember? He got cut from the group at the last minute, how could you forget?”