based on the prompt: "I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again."

She remembered staring at her screen for a minute too long when the first notification flashed. The invitation to a group chat for a reunion that she never saw coming, simply because she didn’t plan on going.

Especially when her fingertip hovered over a name that stood out amongst the list of contacts that had RSVP’d for the occasion she couldn’t help but dread.

Kim Jinwoo

Her eyes squinted to make sense of the impossibly tiny icon of his profile, a part of her terrified to zoom into the photo for a reason she couldn’t pin point. Even then she could tell that it was him, raven hair falling softly over dream bound eyes which she felt silly for getting so worked up over. It’s just a picture for goodness sake.

It only spurred out a string of unnerving thoughts. How a mere picture could affect her this way let alone seeing him for the first time since they parted ways with broken hearts pinned to their sleeves.

The guilt tripping began when her response was nowhere to be seen. Messages from old friends bombarded her phone, the pinging ceasing once they succeeded and she sunk into the mess of duvet, regretting her life’s decision all at once.

A month and a dozen of outfit changes later here she was, sat in the midst of excited buzzing of people and what have you been up to’s and the most popular one yet: oh, you’re married? Congratulations!

Her cheeks hurt from trying to keep up, plastering a painfully cheery smile that drained her internally, reminding her of her affection for red wine.

It had been her sole target, to keep her eyes from wandering too far. Secretly bracing herself at every tap to her shoulder or sighing a silent relief when the voice that rung with her name held no bittersweet memory.

Alcohol buzzed warmly through her skin, keeping her company as she stalked her way out of the ballroom. Her heels clicked throughout the marble walls, her eyes admiring the sparkling chandeliers and fine art across the hallway.

It was when her gaze landed lazily from the intricate, high ceilings to a man a few steps ahead dressed impeccably well in a dashing navy suit and tie. A few seconds passed, allowing her hazy brain to register the person before her, sinking in his familiar yet newfound beauty in heavy silence.

“Hey, you.” The depth of his voice sounded sweet, just the same, doe eyes blinking back at her and for a while, the earth seemed to tilt.  

“Jinwoo… hi.”

A pair of dimples pierced his cheeks when the corner of his lips lifted to a smile that hitched something in her.

“Leaving so soon?” He asked, taking a step forward with his hands in his pockets.

She remained still, “I wasn’t going to.”

“Liar.” Jinwoo smiled softly, not missing the way she flicked her nails subtly on her side,  “You still do that when you’re nervous.”

“Fine, you caught me.” Her laughter seemed forced, cracking out of her in a shaky breath.

There was a bloating silence once more and the way he looked at her in an invisible spotlight, made her want to scream.

“You look good… better.” She wished that he could have said something else, choked in heartbreaking memories of her wallowed up in self-pity.

“Yeah?”’ She swallowed bravely, staring right back at him for the first time. Wrong move. 

“I saw you when I came in. I saw you first.” He began in a slightly lighter tone this time, “I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”

She had to remind herself to not stare for too long, but Jinwoo always had a knack for terrible jokes and it seemed like it had gotten ing worse.

“Six years and you’re still not over me.” She shot him a dry smile just as sarcastic as she sounded.

“Right, I mean look at you. Doing just fine without me.” He shrugged and she hated how that crooked smile didn’t change a single goddamn bit.

“Yeah, absolutely. Never been better.”

“And I still can’t tell if you’re serious or not.”

“At least I know you’re not. I mean this conversation is pretty forward for a married man.” She pulled the last straw by the looks of it, the way his expression grew slack.

Truthfully, she needed to. Not unless she wanted to give in to her legs that felt numb with each pulsing second.

He said nothing and she chuckled quietly, “Don’t look at me like that, Jinwoo.”

“Like what?” Jinwoo fixated a half lidded gaze drowned in an ocean of overdue apologies.

“Like you’re sorry for me. I’m happy for you, when do I get to meet her?” She managed through the burning lump in , feeling pathetic because it was all a wasted effort. Jinwoo could tell that she meant none of it.

“She would love to meet you.” He said, defeated.

“She knows about me?” It hurt. She desperately blinked back the tears that threatened her, devastation running through her veins as she wondered what he must have said.

“Of course, you were a big part of my life.” There was honesty in every note of his voice. She drew in a sharp breath.

“I’m sure I would’ve gotten a wedding invite if I was.”

“I thought you wouldn’t-”

“Jinwoo, it’s fine.” She looked away and smiled, “And you’re right. I wouldn’t.”