Chapter 9 – under the starry sky

2014

Baekhyun's voice was extremely weak on the phone.

“Can we meet?”

“Yeah, sure. I'll pick you up in 20,” she replied without a second thought.
It well passed midnight but she didn’t care. He needed somebody and she was willing to be that one. Her heart sank just hearing his plead. She could feel the pain and loss in his cracked voice. It grabbed and pulled her underwater with him. Ocean waves were enormous and powerful burying them deeply in the land of fear.
Taeyeon got her keys and rushed out of the dorm. She didn't bother asking for permission or telling anyone. She simply left. It was emergency. The managers didn't ask questions, nobody tried to stop her. The look on her face told them not to.
Or it was the plan of the entertainment from the beginning? To use them as injured preys caught in a trap?

Taeyeon's Hyundai pulled up to roadside and waited with a running engine. In seconds, the door opened and closed with a heavy body crushing to the passenger’s seat.

“Let’s get out of the city,” Baekhyun exclaimed casually without looking into her eyes. He sighed and eased up against the leather seat. He had always found the lavender aroma in her car relaxing so she had been buying the very same air freshener since he told that.

“Okay,” she agreed quietly. She didn't want to dig into something that wasn't her business. She knew he would open up eventually and she would be there for him when he was ready.

She had an idea. A place - not quite outside of the city but far enough - which was her escape on the most stressful days. She loved the hill just above the town. From halfway you had a perfect view of the colourful and lively city of Seoul. Plus, you could see the stars from up there. Tiny and blurry dots on the dark canvas of sky. You couldn't see them from the town but they were there. Always. Just like she wanted to be there for him.

“Are you okay?” she whispered and cut down the engine when they reached the empty parking lot. It was late and this place was usually uninhabited so it was no surprise.

“As okay as I can be,” he sighed again. Deeply with problems of a man who wanted too much. Except, he wasn't pretentious at all and he earned everything he had. “It’s nice here.”

His voice was unsure. His moves were caution. Like he was afraid or prepared to do something unpleasant. Taeyeon suddenly didn’t want to hear him.

Please, don’t leave me.

“Yeah. I like coming up here when things are getting out of hand.” Her breathing was uneven too but she pretended to be tough.

Click-click. The car’s roof moved back and chilly but cozy breeze kissed her face. She looked up to the night sky. “Also, I like stargazing. Adoring how bright and beautiful they are yet I know it’s just their light because the star itself died million years ago.”

Taeyeon wasn’t even good at physics or astronomy but she had always been amazed by the universe and how it worked.

“It’s sad,” Baek murmured, grief colouring his voice. She wasn’t sure anymore they were still talking about the stars.

Nevertheless she shook her head. “No. I actually think it’s quite hopeful. You know, the fact that they shine even though they are not existing anymore. We remember them after their death. Stars are fighters.”

Maybe she was talking nonsense. It didn’t matter. The void needed to be filled. She was too scared of hearing what Baekhyun wanted to say. Maybe he thought everything that happened was his fault. Or worse, hers. Maybe he wanted to end it. She didn’t want to listen yet silence occurred and this time, he was the one to break it.

“Today was our last concert with Kris. He already left the dorm,” he managed to croak out.  “