The autumn wind kissed his skin sending shivers down his spine. But that did not really have any impact on him as he watched them lay the boy inside a casket made out of a bed of roses. It was dawn and the wind was really cruel, never letting anyone bid their goodbyes properly. But it was different for this man. He did not want to say his goodbye. Not yet. Not until his wish was fulfilled. The casket was gently placed on a small wooden boat, enough for only two more people to fit in. He watched the boat sail across the river from near a tree, a little away from the crowd. The sight of the boy's mother sniffle was heart-breaking, eyes all red from bawling the whole night in his arms. He could not help but cry out along with her. But it was a muffled cry as he did not want to devastate her even more. He promised to take care of her son but in the end he couldn't protect him from this dark demanding world. All of these contributing as to why he stood far away.

She kept looking at her son, lying down on the casket with her sorrow-filled eyes, tears pouring out constantly. He himself could not bare watching the love of his life sail into an eternal journey, let alone his mother. She was a single, strong woman who took care of her son, not complaining about anything. Sometimes she would work three-four shifts a day just to afford her son his favourite guitar, which was now lying next to him, lifeless just like him. 

Seungcheol angled his head up, trying to restrain the tears from hitting the ground but he failed miserably as he silently sobbed with his hands covering his mouth. He had his breaking point. He tried to stay strong so that the boy wouldn't feel sorry for leaving him and his mother alone. He was everything in his life. He first laid his eyes on him 7 years ago, when they both were young and innocent.

The first day of university, always though awkward. He aspired to be a musician- a song-writter to be exact, which did come in handy when he and Jeonghan used to do nothing but compose songs together all day long. Jeonghan would carry his precious guitar and Seungcheol would bring his yellow-blue contrast sketch book to their favourite spot- A beautiful meadow, away from the city, They fitted perfectly together. Just like how a bird would come to a tree for its habitation, Seungcheol dwelled in Jeonghan. They started off as friends but soon it was Seungcheol who fell head over heels for him, although Jeonghan did play the part of being a shy school boy who secretly crushed on him. Their first date, Seungcheol would never forget, was an indie concert. It was more of a friends day out, having awesome time singing the songs of their favourite artist but they decided to consider it as a date since they had the best night of their life followed by an appetizing dinner. 

They both loved two things the most in their life- Music and Food. Food was another common interest they shared. They would stroll through random streets in search of new foods. Seungcheol would graze through everything he finds, earning himself a nickname "blackhole" from him. Jeonghan though, had his exemptions. He would never feast on sea foods. He could do a little bit of fried fish but never a shrimp or anything that belonged to the sea. He detested it and Seungcheol still doesn't know why. All these memories brought nothing but the pain of a gunshot. He reminded himself that none of these could ever be done again. But his mind does nothing but play back all the times they hung out together, wrote songs together, laughed together, leaned onto each other.

Last year of university, they moved in together. A home all for themselves to build, all for themselves to destroy. It was one of the happiest day he'd ever lived. They moved in with the permission of their parents and with the help of their friends- Jisoo, Mingyu, Wonwoo, Jihoon and Soonyoung. They packed all their stuffs and their friends, or on this occasion their movers, brought all of Jeonghan's and Seungcheol's belongings inside their new house. Their house was a beautiful one. A black and white interior with a matte finish to it. That house was their world. It had memories of their first kiss, their first fight, their first promise- to hold each other's hands forever. Who would've thought forever could be severed so soon. 

One such memory, Seungcheol remembers, was when he found out that Jeonghan could write lyrics. Better than Seungcheol, if he needs to be honest. It was a rainy afternoon and they were lazing on their couch, watching Mad max: Fury road. It was only after an hour he found that Jeonghan fell asleep in his arms, his head resting on his chest. Seungcheol was amazed as to how this boy could fall asleep despite the constant loud noises from the movie. He decided to turn it off, slightly because they promised to watch it together and mostly because his stomach started to rumble, indicating it needs to fed. He lifted his best friend's head carefully, not to wake the latter up. He placed his head on the couch slowly and finally got up to stretch himself. He let out a grunt and Jeonghan seemingly got a little bit distrubed by his action and squirmed closer to the pillow. He curled up into a ball, letting out a small whimper as he hugged it even tighter. Seungcheol chuckled and reminded himself to get a blanket for him.

He wandered around the kitchen in search of something to put into his stomach but he couldn't find anything since he barely knew the kitchen. Its Jeonghan's department and he always complained about how unfair it is for him to cook every single day. Hence they settled on a deal to call for delivery once in a while which perceived Seungcheol that there might be some left overs from yesterday's food. After foraging the fridge desperately for food, he found some chinese take out and plopped it in a heat resistant cup and shoved it inside the oven. While he waited, he decided to go get that blanket for him.

He entered their shared room and went straight to their bed. A book fell from the covers as he took the blanket. It seemed more like a diary. It might be his personal diary, He thought to himself and resisted the urge to open it and read it. But his curiosity won over and he found his hands picking up the diary from the floor. He made his way back to the kitchen and leaned on the slab. Guilt started to build up as he was invading Jeonghan's privacy but he couldn't help it. Every part of his body wanted to read the contents. So he went with instinct and opened it up but was surprised to not find any dates or the old fashioned Dear diary introduction. Instead he found words written, indented from one side.

It took a little over half a minute to realise that those were lyrical words which had deep meanings to them. He flipped the pages hastily and the pages were filled up to half the book. He couldn't believe what he was reading. He was left in utter shock, his jaw slightly open as he tried to process everything. Jeonghan could write lyrics. He re-composed himself and went back to first page and read all the lyrics he had written. It was mesmerizing as to how well he could write. He was also upset over the fact that he hid this from him. He took his time to go through all the lyrics, reaching the 20th song on the last page. The book was closed and was settled on the slab. It was still beyond his belief that he could write so well. The depth the song conveyed was un-imaginable. Some were about innocent first love while others were about dreams and passion. He also had dedicated some for his mother. He was spacing out when Jeonghan strolled through the kitchen.

"Mmm...Smells nice!" He closed his eyes and let the aroma guild his way. "You cooking?" Jeonghan shuffled closer to him. Seungcheol was still out of the place.

"Hello?" Seungcheol was brought back to his trance when Jeonghan waved his hands in front of his face. He blinked a couple of times before lowering his gaze to the book lying on the slab. Jeonghan followed his sight leading to the table.

"Oh!" Jeonghan stared back at it. "You found it, huh?" He pursed his lips as he picked the book up, bringing it closer to his chest.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jeonghan could see he was a little hurt by his actions. Before he could answer, Seungcheol threw questions at him. "Since when? Were you playing dumb this whole time? What, would I eat you if I knew you could write?" He shook Jeonghan's shoulder a little violently than he intended to.

"It's not tha-" 

"What, your tying to hide the truth now? Your gonna tell me that this was written by some magical creature that visits you every night?" Again before Jeonghan could answer, he rudely blurred out.

"Did you think that my lyrics were not good enough as yours that you purposely hid it?" Now Seungcheol cornered him at the edge of the kitchen, his eyes desperately searching for answers.

"The hell Jeonghan, you are my best friend. Why didn't you have the heart to tell me?" He whispered as he hung his head low, his hands still pinning Jeonghan's shoulders. He bitterly chuckled. "I was not worth it, was I?"

"It's because my music come to life only with your lyrics!" He yelled, not being able to withstand the accusations thrown over him. He did it because he knew Seungcheol was the one who could breathe life to his music.

"It matters only with your lyrics. Even with my words, the song feels empty. The moment I read your lyrics in class, I knew it had to be you with whom I should compose songs. Damn it Seungcheol, you made my songs complete" He was yelling upto this point. "You made me complete" The last words came out as a whisper as he slapped Seungcheol's hand away and stormed to the hall. All Seungcheol could do was groan and hit the slab, knocking a few vessels whilst he ruffled his hair. He stayed there for at least 10 more minutes before he decided to apologize for his doings. Jeonghan did hide it from him and he only intended to enquire what this was about but his temper caught on and he yelled at him for no apparent reason. He reluctantly walked towards the hall and sat next to Jeonghan who had his back turned towards him.

"Jeonghan, I'm sorry..." He scooted closer to him, holding his arms but he only slapped it away again.

"Babe I'm sor-" He turned him back forcefully but gently and he was shocked to see him in that state, eyes red and puffy from crying. It was cold so his nose was also stuffed and red.

"You're crying?!" His eyes widened and he cupped Jeonghan's face. Jeonghan quickly wiped his eyes and tried to turn away only to be caught by Seungcheol's piercing gaze. He muttered a soft "no" as he sniffled.

"Yoon Jeonghan, you cried?" This was the first time he has ever found the younger cry. He might look feminine but he was savage. He was never a weakling everyone thought he was. 4 years of friendship and love, this is the first time he has seen him cry.

"What? I do have feelings. I cry at times" He answered to Seungcheol's bewildered self. "Just not in front of people" He muttered under his breath, not wanting Seungcheol to hear but he did hear it.

"What, you cry alone? How many times has this happened?" Seungcheol's jaw dropped. 

"Jeonghan" He called out to him as he found the latter staring down at his leg, leaving his question hanging in air. 

"When ever I feel like I need too!" He half-yelled, half-cried. And then he started to sob again. This time he wrapped his arms around Jeonghan to hug him.

"Oh Hannie.." He whispered and kissed the crown of his head, letting himself pour out again. He never knew Jeonghan was an emotional type of person. After cooing him to calm down, they stayed in a comfortable silence and Jeonghan shifted so he could lay his head on the holder's chest with him caressing his head.

"When I was 16" He suddenly blurred out earning a confused 'what' from Seungcheol. "When I was 16, I never really had a passion. I desperately searched for something that would invoke my passion. And that was song-writing. Even before I started to master guitar, I wrote lyrics. My old note books would be filled with random drabbles. But since I was timid and shy back then, people never really knew my talent. I wasn't even sure if I was good at writing. It was my mother who helped me realise my love for music and made me join this university" 

"I'm sorry Seungcheol, for not telling you" He sat back up to look at his face, staring at his dark orbs giving off a sense of warm feeling.

"I was scared that you wouldn't lend me your lyrics anymore. That you would stop hanging out with me. The main reason we hung out and became friends was simply because of composing" Every word coming out of his lips were sincere.

"No" A gentle smile crept onto Seungcheol's face. "It was because I liked you the moment I saw you. I knew I had to make you my friend the moment you took your guitar and played a snippet in class" 

He hugged him tightly again. "Jeonghan, I would've never stopped hanging out with you even if I knew you could write lyrics. I did not chose to be with you only because of your music alone. It's simply because...It's You. Yoon Jeonghan who made me feel like a petite presence with his ever so charming smile and personality"

"Sho dhoes that meen yor not angre?" He asked, face squished against his chest.

"I was never angry in the first place. Just a little bit upset that you hid something from me" He frowned but it disappeared immediately and was replaced with a exaggerating gasp.

"I think I have a rival! Man, your lyrics are really good" 

"Really?" His eyes shone at the appreciation he received. He shot straight up and clasped his hands together like a 3 year old who's drawing has been appreciated.

Seungcheol chuckle. "Yes! And I want you to continue writing and use them in your composition" Jeonghan smile fell but he managed to bring it back up while he looked at him with his earnest eyes.

"Not now Seungcheol. Maybe when I'm ready but not now" That was the last word he shared before falling asleep again. The food has been long forgotten as Jeonghan's pretty sleeping face was enough for him to fill his tummy. He gently his hair and watched him sleep, the warmth of each other satisfying their need of a blanket as the sun sets down.
 

Half an hour after, he was ready to be laid inside. Seungcheol stopped his tears long ago but he knew he had a lot in him to let out. He was pretty sure he's gonna be a crying mess when he reaches home after his funeral. But he had much more to take care of. He had informed Jeonghan's wish to his mother and she's carrying them out. Seungcheol was never liked among their relatives. He doesn't blame them. It was their stereotypical view of men together. But Jeonghan's mother was understanding. She wanted the best for her son and allowed them to date and eventually get married. She herself got isolated from them for their judging looks. But this was his funeral. Inviting them was just a formality, Seungcheol knew. 

His wish was revealed when one day Jeonghan's came bursting through their studio doors. He was arranging some compositions when a panting Jeonghan stood in front of him, his arms resting on the chair Seungcheol was sitting. He eventually collapsed onto Seungcheol's arms and he was more than welcomed to have Jeonghan sit on his lap. 

"Cheol-I Found..." He breathed heavily. Seungcheol could barely make out what he was saying. But he blabbered something he could not quite process.

"Woah slow down there." He chuckled as he held him closer. "Breathe in, breathe out" He instructed him and to Seuncheol's surprise, he followed it. No death stares and no hitting. He took two deep breaths in and out before continuing.

"I found it!" He happily chipped, eyes forming crescents. Seungcheol was still confused so he tilted his head to the side like a lost puppy.

"This book! I've been searching for it for a long time. My mom found it when she was clearing my room today. Oh god, words can't express how happy I am!" He immediately hugged Seungcheol so tightly that he was convinced he would die due to lack of oxygen if he kept hugging him.

"Hannie.Your.Choki-" Before those struggled words came out if his mouth, Jeonghan claimed his lips. He connected them both with his hands on his nape. Seungcheol was initially surpr