**The Exam Week**

Like all my normal days, I don’t ever step a foot inside the campus before I wait for Jiyon or she waits for me… I walked with her to our classes because we were passing exams beside each other and I found the students standing accros the classrooms waiting for the teachers to appear so we can begin our exams.. I saw two familiar figuers standing just across my classroom and I couldn’t believe my eyes..

« Jiyon-ahhh, Look.. » She looked the way I told her and she couldn’t  believe it either

« Yujin-ah, Guess It’s fate… » She said dramatically to tease me

« Yaaa stop It already… I didn’t ever know that he’s passing with me too » Yes you guessed it right… Changmin was in the same classroom with me and Kyuhyun..

Aish let’s just not care about it.. It’s just an exam after all and I have to stay completely focused… I have to think about my studies right now…

-SKIP-

I could’t deny that even though I was passing my exams I was really happy the whole week because first of all, I can get to see Changmin everyday and second I grew Closer with Kyuhyun… I have to admit it.. Changmin was right when he said that Kyuhyun is nice if you get to know him…

Honestly, My exams didn’t go that well because I wasn’t ready for them like I have to but I did my best… Now finally we can rest a little bit because winter vacation is coming… Well It wasn’t exactly a vacation because we had many projects to do but I can have some time to myself at least.. I can get my thoughts together and think about what’s going to happen next.. I was exited because I was getting my driving licsence first and then Music club is starting just after winter breaks and what made me happy the most was that My birthday is coming soon.. I was hyper and exited about it..

-Skip-

The vacation started and I have been meeting with Jiyon everyday.. We study in the morning and we have fun In the afternoon in the first week... The second week was really getting chilly and colder.. So we Just stayed home and had fun there… Christmas and New year passed… It was my favorite season.. The vacation was short though but I was happy to Go back after two weeks..

The day came and we went back just to find the college closed for some problems about engineering courses so they told us that we’re basically still in vacation until they tell us when we’ll be back… I was happy about it.. I was happy because they gave us more time to review owr old lessons and to get prepared to the next exams… To tell you the truth, I realised that I was just crushing on Changmin but all of my feelings vanished after the vacation… Kyuhyun either didn’t even ask about me so I just let it go and didn’t care about it.. I was living my life peacefully and didn’t care about anything but my studies…

**My birthday**

I was awake in the morning just to check my SNS wall and find out who wished me a happy birthday and I found some of my classmates, some of my old friends from high school and some family members.. I really enjoy it when I see what they told me and it actually makes me feel special for them.. I was still checking the wall when I saw Kyuhyun wished me a happy birthday too.. I just smiled and thanked him in a comment and the day went on like that.. My family got me a party and I had fun.. It was almost midnight and I was preparing myself to sleep when I got a text and by opening it, My heart dropped…

It was from a number that would always stay present in my memory… a number that I would never forget.. It was him.. My first love…

He simply said « I made it before midnight… Happy Birthday My Yujin »…

My heart started beating faster, my feet started to shake and I didn’t know how I am feeling anymore… I felt my eyes getting teary but I still managed to hold it  because I promised myself that I would never cry over him anymore… It was already 4 years… that’s when I realised that I was lying to myself all the time.. that I didn’t forget about him.. that he’s still breathing inside of me.. that his place in my heart was the same…

I couldn’t possibly tell Jiyon or She’ll get mad at me so I just kept it a secret.. I replayed to him and said :

« At least you still remember.. thank you »

I got a text back saying « Do you still keep the teddy bear I gave you on your birthday 4 years ago ?? »

I smiled and replayed « Yes, I would never throw it you know.. It’s the only thing left from you »

We kept on talking like there’s no tomorrow that night.. We talked like before and I can never deny it I was happy about it…

-Skip-

I was feeling uneasy from that night.. I couldn’t stop thinking about him.. I still miss him like crazy and it was totally wrong… I was doing wrong with myself and I was torturing it without realising.. I was lost and I didn’t know what to do anymore.. We’re still in vacation and I had the special session outside the college today.. I didn’t really care I was back to that miserable state and I didn’t want to talk to anyone.. I was on the way listening to sad songs and I reached the place just to find the session started already and my spot was full.. there was just an only empty seat and it was beside Changmin.. I didn’t really care about and I just sat beside him without saying a single thing.. I wasn’t in my right mind and I wasn’t in the mood at all to talk nor to listen nor to study… I know It wasn’t right but my heart was getting cutted by a knife until I can’t feel the pain anymore… It was already almost 4 years since the last time I saw him and I knew I said I forgot but that night made me take it all back.. I still love him… and what annoyed me the most that I couldn’t talk about it to anyone…

-SKIP-

It was finally time to go back to college and tried to act as cool as I can so that Jiyon won’t notice anything strange about me.. I managed to be normal like usual laughing and having fun like usual and I kept myself like that until I managed to regain back my old self… I realised that I was hoping for nothing and looking for nothing… I realised that at some point, I have to let the pain go. It is unhealthy to keep thinking about an ended relationship that I can't do anything about. At some point, I have to make peace with the past so that it doesn't get in the way of my future. It may hurt right now but, sometimes a breakup can actually be a blessing in disguise. Sometimes I will lose someone I never thought I would, just to make room for someone else who can love me with a much greater capacity as they fully restore my hope in being in love. Sometimes we can be so stuck on looking back at the person who left that, we completely overlook the fact that room was being made for someone greater to enter our lives…

Simply It wasn’t meant to be and I have to deal with that.. It’s  story from the past and It was over 4 years ago.. There’s no need to keep thinking about it.. I was hurting when he’s having fun and dating day and night so why don’t I just look for myself and do the same ?? I have the total right too..

It was time to our japanese class again and I was walking with Jiyon and we were about to take the stairs up to our classroom when I realised Kyuhyun rushing to come with us :

« Heyy Yujin and Jiyon-sshi !! » He said cheerfully

« Hey Kyuhyun.. » I said smiling.. His eyes grew wider and his smile was appearing like a little child and his face was blushing ?? WHAT ON EARTH WAS THAT ?? Don’t tell me he’s crushing on me ?? WHAT ?? THE ICEBERG is CRUSHING ON ME ??? No way..

We just kept a cool conversation and he sat just ahead of me and Jiyon.. He was talking all the session.. I was bored anyway because I don’t really like japanese so I just kept on listening to his stories.. It was my first time seeing a different side of him.. I didn’t ever know that he was this talkative.. He was talking about his family, his idiot school days, his hobbies and basically everything.. HE even told me that he loves singing and that he’s going to join the music club too… At least I can have some company in the club then…