Jackson is a horrible person. The worst. A hypocrite like no other.

It’s been almost two weeks since he’s seen Mark. Which is his doing because he’s been purposely voiding the elder. Making up lame excuses about school, work, even changing his workout days so he doesn’t risk running into Mark at the gym. Thank goodness he and Mark were completing two different majors, so the chances of meeting at campus were low as well. Not that he didn’t go out of his away before to meet Mark before and after classes.

So much for being honest and real with people eh? Mark didn’t deserve this type of treatment from Jackson. He wondered if the older suspected anything. He still kept Mark updated on his life through text messages, so maybe Mark really was buying all the school and work bull.

Maybe Mark was, but Jinyoung wasn’t. Along with avoiding Mark, Jackson has also been avoiding is other friends as well.

That is until Jinyoung had come knocking at his dorm a few days back and demanded Jackson come get coffee with him. Threatening him with pictures of him from the time he cross-dressed with BamBam. How exactly did Jinyoung convince him to do that? And why was BamBam so eager to actually do it?

Jackson didn’t even put up a fight with Jinyoung. No logical person would ever fight with their mom if they are in the wrong. And the idea of talking to someone about this whole predicament he was in actually sounded comforting.

They sat across from each other, waiting for their order.  Jinyoung looking quite comfortable with a scarf wrapped around his neck. The café was quite busy, the sound of mindless chatter all around them. Their friend Jimin finally arrived with their order and he chatted with her for a few minutes, playfully teasing her because that was one of his favorite pass times, until she had to go back to work. Jinyoung still hadn’t spoken a word. He was quite. Too quite. And it was making Jackson restless.  

“So-“Jackson decided to break the silence but Jinyoung spoke at the same time as well.

“Jackson. Is everything ok? Please don’t say ‘its fine’ when you’ve practically been off the grid for the past two weeks. And you kind of look like your uncomfortable seating with me.” Jinyoung glanced down at his hands that were tapping away at the surface of the table. A habit of Jackson’s when he wants to say something but doesn’t exactly now how to.

Jackson sighed, looking up to meet Jinyoung’s concerned eyes. He mulled over on how to exactly start this conversation.

“Mark didn’t say anything to upset you or something, right? Did you get into a fight?” Jinyoung asked.

“No no, of course not. Mark hyung could never do anything to hurt me.” Jackson replied, a little defensively.

“You know Mark actually believes that maybe he’s done something to upset you? You’re always attached to his hip. It’s not like you to give anyone, let alone Mark hyung the cold shoulder.”

“No no – I didn’t, I mean, ok yes, I have been avoiding Mark, I’ve been avoiding everyone, but Mark didn’t do anything to upset me, neither did any of you guys. Something…something happened last week and I’m just not ready to face the problem. I would, but, I don’t know what to do and I’ve never been so lost before. Jinyoung I don’t know what to do.” Jackson probably wasn’t making any sense right now. But he was surprised to see Jinyoung nodding his head and looking as if he had finally figured something out.

“Is this about your soulmate tattoo?” Jinyoung asked hesitantly.

Jackson’s mouth fell open, eyes widening as well. What? How did he- but- yes Jinyoung is the mother of the group and really nothing gets past him, but Jackson hadn’t told anyone about this!

“How-how did you know-“

“I saw it. The night you went clubbing on your birthday? It was me who dropped you and BamBam both home. Maybe you did have too much to drink, judging by your face you don’t remember seeing me at all that night do you?”

No, he didn’t remember. And yes, maybe he did have a little too much to drink that night.

Jinyoung knew.

This whole time.

What if he told Mark? Did he tell Mark?

As if reading his mind, Jinyoung added “Relax, I haven’t told anyone about this. I was waiting for you to say something.”

For the next several minutes, Jackson poured out everything that has been clouding his mind for the last two weeks. Jackson could practically feel the weight being lifted off of him. And of course in order to have his story make sense he had to tell Jinyoung he was in love with Mark and had been for a while. And again, Jinyoung surprised Jackson by not actually looking surprised at all at his confession. Does anything ever get past him?

“It’s kind of obvious how much you love him. And how much he loves you. It’s actually so annoying seeing you both dance around each other. How could two people be so oblivious to each other?” Jinyoung asked, looking both relieved by his confession and kind of fed up like he was explaining something to a 3 year old because-wait. Hold up – how much Mark loves him?

“Jinyoung, Mark hyung doesn’t love me.” Jackson was surprised at how much those words hurt to say out loud. “His soulmate-“

“His soulmate is dead. Mark never got to meet him. Never got to fall in love with him. Mark can’t stop himself from eventually falling in love with someone. Don’t you think it’s worse for Mark? Even if he comes to term with the fact that his soulmate doesn’t exist, he risks falling in love with anyone because what are the chances of meeting a second soulmate?”

“Hyung it doesn’t take a tattoo to let you know Mark would be wonderful a person to spend the rest of your life with. A lot of people would be happy to risk being with Mark.” Including me, Jackson thought to himself. Jackson could feel head spreading across his cheeks, and he looked down, embarrassed by the words coming out of his mouth. “And if they don’t, they don’t know what they’re missing out on.”

Jinyoung reached across the table to grasp Jackson’s hand. That half fed up, half exasperated expression back on his face. “And your one of those people who don’t know what they’re missing out on. And would risk it as well.” Jinyoung said, with a small smile.

Jackson tightened is hold on Jinyoung hands. Trying to believe the words coming out of his mouth.

“Mark is long past the point where his affection for you was strictly brotherly. A senpai protecting his cute little kohai.” Jackson chuckled. Jackson was not cute. Handsome? Yes. y? Hell yes. But he was not cute. Mark was cute.

“Do you remember the time I cut my hand while cooking and had to get stiches? And the time BamBam got out of hand during a nigh out clubbing and got himself beaten by a couple of people?” Jackson nodded. “We both ended up in the hospitable because of those incidents. Now think of the time you sprained your ankle during fencing practice. How many times did Mark come over to your dorms to check up on you after that? How many times did he freak out over you putting on the littlest weight? How many times did Mark act like you had broken both of your legs and needed nursing 24/7?” Jackson smiled, the memories coming back to him.  Jackson thinks he knows where Jinyoung is going with this. And it shocks him how used to he has gotten with Mark fretting over him that it hadn’t occurred to him that the special attention he received from the elder might mean more then he thinks it does.

“Mark didn’t do that with me or BamBam. I’m not saying Mark doesn’t care about me or BamBam, but a cut hand and a beating is a whole lot worse than a sprained ankle. I am 99.9% sure you’ve been glossing over the way Mark is around you as just friendly behavior. In fact, I don’t think Mark realizes how obvious he is either.” Jinyoung said, with a roll of his eyes.

Damn those butterflies were back in Jackson’s stomach, and his head felt like it was buzzing with too much information. But something spurred inside of Jackson and he felt…hopeful? Maybe…this could work out for him. Maybe he and Mark could work something out.

 “Should I just… should I just tell him?”

“Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, which I pretty much know he does, who do you think your hurting more if you choose to keep this all locked in? You’re the one who’s all about being honest and open right? Take your own advice for a change. At least let Mark know you’re not upset with him.”

Jackson doesn’t know why, but suddenly, he just had the urge to go and meet Mark. God how did he go two weeks without seeing his face? He needed to first apologize for being completely MIA for the past two weeks. To let him know that he’s not upset him, could never really be upset with him.  And then… and then…

And then be honest with him.

Jinyoung was right.

Carrying these feelings around wasn’t making him feel any better. At least the feelings he’d been harboring for the past one year would be out in the open. And if Mark were to reject him then…

Jackson’s stomach twisted by the thought of Mark not returning his feelings. And refusing to even be his friend after he confessed…

No. Jackson wouldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t force himself on the elder. He just wanted to be honest with Mark. And with himself. He couldn’t lose Mark as a friend.

“Have you finally convinced yourself to go talk to Mark?” Jinyoung asked, who’d been quietly observing Jackson for the past few minutes. Jackson really did wear his heart on his sleeves. It was way too easy to tell how he was feeling just by looking at his face. Just moments ago, he saw excitement and determination flicker across Jackson’s face, then guilt, worry, and now, something acute to fear and worry.

“Yes, yes I- I need to go talk to Mark. I should do it now. I want to go see Mark now. He’s at his dorm right?” Jackson replied back, already standing up.

“Should be, his bed is his favorite place to hang out on Saturdays.”   

“Thank you for listening Jinyoung, I wish I talked to you two weeks ago.”

Jinyoung smiled at Jackson. “It’s ok. Sooner or later you’ll realize my worth.”

Jackson chuckled and immediately went to wrap is arms around him. Ok so maybe Jackson had a problem when it came to hugging people. Sue him.

“I’m really sorry for ignoring you guys for the past few weeks, I wasn’t trying-“

“Jackson, its ok. Really. I’m not upset. ” Jinyoung interrupted, returning back the hug. “Now stop wasting time and go find Mark.” Jinyoung added, pulling back and giving him his best “you can do it!” smile. Jackson gave him one last smile before he quite literally bolted towards the doors.

Jinyoung shook his head and smiled to himself. Seriously, how could two people be so blind?

“Why did Jackson just run out like a madmen? I think he actually knocked an old lady down.” Jimin said, coming up beside him with a tray of orders balanced on one hand and washcloth in the other.

“I’ll give you a hint. I think your OTP might become canon soon.” Jinyoung smirked at her, taking a sip of his coffee, knowing exactly the way she would react to this. 

Jimin gave him a confused look. But after a moment her eyes widened and she said “Ohmygosh Jaebum finally asked you out?”

Jinyoung eyes widened and he choked on his coffee and spluttered it all over the table. He could feel the tips of his ears turning red. He coughed a few times to get his breathing back to normal. “What? No! Me andJaebum-that’s not- who is your ultimate OTP?” Jinyoung managed to wheeze out.

Jimin finally seemed to catch up to Jinyoung. Her eyes brightened and she was squealing and jumping up and down on the spot, and Jinyoung was surprised the tray in her hands hadn’t tipped over yet.

“NO WAY!MARK AND JACKSON?!” Jimin really needed to calm down because they were getting strange looks from people now.

“Yes, and calm down, you’re making a scene.”

It’s as if Jinyoung hadn’t spoken at all, because Jimin still continued to squeal and giggle like the fangirl she was. “God it’s about ing time. I was so ready to just put them in a room and force them to sort out their .”

Jinyoung chuckle, knowing full well she meant it. “Yes, so was I.”

Jimin looked like she wanted to say more but stopped herself. “Ok my manager is giving me weird looks, I have to go, but I want more details on this later on.” she said, schooling her features, but Jinyoung could see the genuine happiness evident in her eyes. “By the way, Markson might be happening now, but I need you and Jaebum to happen as well. And don’t think I won’t lock you two in a room if I have to as well.” And she walked away before Jinyoung had the chance to reply. Not that he could anyway.

Jimin didn’t have to turn back to know Jinyoung was probably sitting there, head down in embarrassment and resembling a tomato.

Mark wasn’t upset. Really, he wasn’t.

So what if Jackson had been acting weird for the past couple of days. And was avoiding him at campus, and the gym…and was also strangely robotic on text.

Maybe Jackson had something going on. Maybe the excuses about school assignments and work were actually legit. Maybe something was bothering Jackson. Maybe Mark had done something to upset Jackson. Because Jackson has never failed to open up with Mark about anything before in the past, so maybe he did unintentionally do something to hurt the younger.

But then again, why wouldn’t Jackson come out and call Mark out? Being reserved and quite was not in Jackson’s nature. This sounded like something Mark would do. God is this how Jackson felt around Mark in the very beginning of their friendship?

Ok so maybe Mark was upset. He hasn’t seen Jackson in two weeks and if it weren’t for the fact that he feels like he’s being avoided on purpose, maybe he wouldn’t be that upset.

However at this moment, not only was Mark upset, but he was confused, and kind of hurt. He hadn’t expected to find Jackson and Jinyoung when he went out for lunch. Jinyoung didn’t tell him he’d be meeting with Jackson when he left that morning. He also remembers Jinyoung telling him that he hasn’t heard from Jackson either in a while. Not that he has anything against Jinyoung hanging out with Jackson, why would he, they were all friends. But why didn’t Jinyoung tell him anything?

So Jackson really was avoiding him. He still had no idea why though. And he desperately tried to rack is brain to remember anything he might’ve done to have hurt Jackson.

Mark could’ve gone in the café and confronted Jackson. But he left the scene as quickly as possible. He didn’t go back to his dorm. He didn’t want to see Jinyoung either.

Mark didn’t know where he was heading, letting his feet lead the path. When he finally looked up and observed his surroundings he laughed quietly to himself. He was back at the same park him and Jackson usually got ice cream from. Where they found that little girl.

Mark felt his phone vibrate but chose to ignore it. Rather preferring to enjoy the weather and a few moments of silence. However, whoever was messaging Mark was really persistent because his phone kept getting notifications every few minutes. When he finally pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the screen, he halted his actions midway seeing the name flashing before his eyes.

Jackson.

Instead of being happy that Jackson finally decided to call him, Mark felt even more upset then he was before. And kind of irritated. Clearly the only reason Jackson was getting in contact with Jackson now was because Jinyoung had probably convinced him. There little coffee date should be over by now. He bet they were discussing Mark just a few minutes ago.

Maybe Mark shouldn’t assume so much, but he couldn’t think of anything he did wrong and wanted to be upset at Jackson. Let’s see how he likes it. Mark bet he sounded childish, but a few more days of avoiding Jackson wouldn’t kill him. They wouldn’t. Mark had some sense of self-control.

Marki-pooh [2:45 PM]

Cant talk right now busy all day

Talk to u latr