Jisoo walks slowly on the roadside, today was pretty messy. The leader was furious, the other member is upset, is boyfriend was mad at him; all of them were upset because of him. It’s like everything he do is a mistake, is he breathing a mistake too?

Funny that the others didn’t say anything about how annoying he’s breathing nears them. If he looks back, he’s nothing like the others.

He can’t sing as good as seungkwan or seokmin, he barely sing a line in their songs, he’s not pretty like Junghan , he’s not music genius like jihoon. He can’t dance like minghao or being passionate like chan, he can’t choreograph like soonyoung, or even do matrial arts like jun, compared to hip hop team he’s a complete trash, he can’t rap like seungcheol, making lyrics like Vernon, let alone being charming like his boyfriend and wonwoo.

Sometime it feels pointless to debut surrounded by all of those diamond like people, being the only stone, or so he thought. He steals time to practice alone when he has any, trying to perfect his flaws and insecurities but he thinks that was miserably failed, remembering the event occurred this evening. He and his boyfriend had an argument, that always happened, but today was different, he exploded too, didn’t even try to calm the younger down.

Not long after their awards event, jisoo joined the nearest church theatre for Easter event, no he’s not playing his church oppa image, after they debut, jisoo can’t really go to church for occasional event, even his Christmas night and Christmas was spent for their first concert, and this time he want to be selfish for once, just once to be in an Easter celebration.

But his boyfriend said that he’s neglecting him and jisoo explodes, he just tried to have his little church time and mingyu said that he neglecting him? jisoo believed he said something about his church activity as a reason and after he stormed out the dorm he feel guilty, using his church activity as an excuse is something low, he know seventeen have a really tight friendship that nothing can breach and using his religion against them is like some betrayal, seungcheol was furious because he was keeping his activity a secret, other member was so upset, and his boyfriend was mad. He was tempted to go back to the dorm and apologize, but he was too stubborn to give in to the idea...  and now here he is, somewhere in seoul (because he believe he’s lost, after his little mindless wandering).

Jisoo decided it’s time to stop when he see a park, and walk to the nearest bench to sit. Pulling out his phone from his pocket and slide it open, no messages, no missed calls, nothing. He sighs clutching his phone tight in his small palm. The member probably just gonna wait until he’s cool enough and comeback to the dorm or simply ignoring the fact that he’s missing, did they forgot that jisoo don’t even know seoul that well?. Sighing again jisoo closed his eyes, or maybe, they realised that they don’t actually need jisoo? Mingyu didn’t even send him a message asking where he is... what is he doing? Playing with wonwoo? Or maybe junghan?

One thing jisoo never tell mingyu is the reason why he hates being called short by mingyu is, wonwoo and junghan’s height that look good with his monster height. Jisoo is too short to be held by waist, or to peck because mingyu gotta lean down quite a lot, and he believe that chan will be taller than him in some months. And his boyfriend is surrounded by those pretty guys who’s taller than him gives him the fear that mingyu will fall for them and leave him, he got along really well with them in the past months, and with wonwoo? They are bestfriends, bestfriends fall in love, or at least one of them falls for the other, what if mingyu actually like wonwoo and can’t be with him because he’s afraid that he’ll ruined their friendship and date jisoo instead? The thought of that makes jisoo choked a sob, trying to hold all his sadness inside, not wanting to cry in public.

When jisoo rubs his eyes, wiping his tears away. He heard a scream and then a gunshot and his head shot up almost immediately, his eyes widened when he see a girl lying cold on the ground, and two guys rummaging her bag, laughing.

Jisoo was so scared and the only thing in his mind is, run, and reports this to the police, hoping the criminal didn’t see him, jisoo slowly stands up and dash out the place.

But,

BANG— BANG—

Jisoo feels a pain that he never knew exist. And then his phone rings, with caller id ‘Seungcheollie :D’

Mingyu’s POV.

The world around him is new; it feels like the world around him is in mute, and black and white. He used to like the color, but no, not in this condition. The air around him is so tense that make him suffocated. He never really see seungcheol cried except in their debut project reality, and today he saw the oldest of the group hugging their manager in fear, bawling his eyes out, saying lines of apologizes, saying that he shouldn’t press on the younger because he wants to do an activity out the group, saying that he was useless as a leader.

Seungkwan didn’t cry. He simply hugs chan who’s sobbing, saying that jisoo gonna be okay and they’ll play together again but the fear in seungkwan eyes talk other meaning, the fear of losing one of his hyung is clear. Minghao clutch jun’s hand and never let go, like he’s looking for comfort from the older and the older never move from his side, looking for comfort as well. Seokmin try to melt the tense away, by pulling out a joke, but his eyes didn’t shines like usual and his smiles was forced, mingyu know that he wants to cry. Jihoon? He simply sat there, holding his phone. He’s mad, mingyu can tell, he’s mad at himself for not calling jisoo early; when jisoo was missing he tried to convince seungcheol loads of times to call jisoo because it’s almost mid night, but seungcheol said that jisoo needs to reflect his action. Only if he call jisoo without asking seungcheol.

Junghan is pacing, clearly worried about jisoo. He was sleeping when they got the information saying jisoo was shot, Junghan didn’t cry but he exploded, he shouted at mingyu and punched him on the face, saying that it was his fault that his bestfriend lying there in the operation room, the next second jisoo stormed out the door, junghan was the one who tell mingyu to go and apologize, and say to the group that they were being too harsh on jisoo. Vernon didn’t even open his mouth, but his eyes are so dark, it’s like guilt starts to eat him alive, he’s been giving jisoo a cold shoulder since a week ago when jisoo told him about his secret activities, and yes he was the one who spilled it out on today group meeting.

Wonwoo is still sobbing, soonyoung didn’t even say a word and ignored seokmin’s jokes, it’s like he’s not their soonyoung anymore, his eyes serious and there’s a hint of him blaming himself in his mind.

Mingyu, he don't actually know what to do, he can’t even cry because it feels too unreal, he can still feel how strong junghan’s punch on his face, he bet his eyes will be blue in no time, some of words junghan throws on him, still ringing in his head.

‘WHAT IF HE NEVER WAKE UP?!’

‘WHAT IF, TODAY IS OUR LAST DAY WITH HIM AND THE LAST FACE WE SAW, WAS HIS SAD FACE?!”

Mingyu shakes his head, jisoo is a strong guy he’ll survive... right?

As like a cue, of his question’s answers the operation room notification light turn red, and not long after that a doctor followed by nurses who’s pushing jisoo’s bed walked out the nurses walked to jisoo’s room, leaving the doctor and seventeen along with their manager to talk. Mingyu steal a glance towards his unconscious boyfriend, and his heart ache on how pale he was, like his blood have been drain from him.

“I supposed you guys all are Mr. Hong’s relatives, so... he’s in coma, he lost a great amount of blood, he was shot twice, and one almost pierced his lung, luckily not, his body is so weak, and I don't actually know how he survived, it’s a miracle. And now, it’s all his choice to stay or to go...” with that the doctor bows and walks away.

‘WHAT IF....... what if you have no chance to say you’re sorry, or to say that you love him for the last time mingyu?’

a/n : hello! I know this is depressing, but I was in the mood because some angsty feel slap me in the face two days ago. What do you want to be the ending? Happy or sad ending? Comment and I’ll choose...