Not even bothering to try and hide the fact that he'd been crying, Jeonghan followed Seungcheol into the dorm later that morning.

Some of the boys were awake by now, and they greeted him when he walked in. Though they were all worried, some tried not to show it – which Jeonghan was grateful for. It gave him a vague sense of normalcy in this strange, troubling situation.

Jisoo rushed in when he heard the boys return, looking more exhausted than Jeonghan had ever seen him. He smiled softly at Jeonghan, despite how anxious he obviously was. “So? What did the doctor say?”

“He's scheduled for surgery on Monday. Until then the symptoms are similar to pneumonia. They gave him medicine for the fever. Stay away from the petals and do anything to help him be as comfortable as possible.”

Jeonghan felt like a kid, what with Seungcheol explaining everything for him, but he didn't say anything. He didn't really feel like talking anyway. He just made himself comfortable on the couch, Jisoo following, sitting next to him. He knew he was going to spend the next few days in bed, but he wanted to avoid it as long as possible. Being lazy and laying around is great when you're doing it voluntarily but feeling so sick you can't even leave your bed feels terrible.

“Are you going to tell us who it is?” Soonyoung asked, genuinely curious.

“I think if I was going to, I would have said something by now.” Jeonghan mumbles, staring at his hands in his lap.

Jisoo absentmindedly rubbed Jeonghan's back, watching over him like a hawk. “You don't have to tell anyone anything if you don't want to.”

Jeonghan nodded softly, unsure if the movement was enough for Jisoo to notice. His head hurt.

Just then, Seungcheol walked in with a pill and a bottle of water. “Here. I put the bottle in the bathroom.”

“Thank you,” Jeonghan said, taking the pill and swallowing it along with half of the water. Seungcheol didn't move, and when Jeonghan looked back up at him, he felt almost guilty for the worry in his eyes. They stared at one another for a moment before Seungcheol sighed and patted Jeonghan's head. “If you need anything these next few weeks just ask me.”

“Or me,” Jisoo added. “No matter what time it is.”

“We'll both be sleeping in your room so we'll always be there when you need us.”

Jeonghan felt flustered, having Seungcheol and Jisoo worked up over him. If it weren't for the circumstances he probably would have been really happy, but now it just made him feel worse – mentally and physically, apparently, because another coughing fit hit him then.

Seungcheol ran off to get the bucket but thankfully nothing came up this time. Should he be thankful for that? He'd rather not suffocate. He'd rather not vomit roses either.

That reminded Jeonghan – he had wanted to do some research on the disease. Dr. Kim had only told him so much and he was sure he could find more online. Resting his head on Jisoo's shoulder, he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

A quick search for Hanahaki disease brought up Wikipedia, a conspiracy website, some YouTube videos.... Jeonghan huffed and refined his search to 'Hanahaki disease firsthand' and was excited to find a forum dedicated to those who had experienced it. Clicking the link and scrolling through, he began reading personal accounts from those who had survived or were suffering from the disease.

'Petals are orange?????'

'Boyfriend found out...'

'Vomited flowers on him... in bed'

'he doesnt erturn my feeligns'

'My girlfriend contracted this disease?'

'Are my unrequited feelings for an idol?'

That was interesting. Jeonghan clicked the link and read the full post.

'I didn't think I had feelings for anyone, so when the doctor told me why I started coughing up flowers I was confused.... The only person I can think of is Momo from Twice.... ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜ I've never told anyone I like her because I'm a girl... do you think she's the reason....'

That was nothing less than terrifying. There could be fans out there who could contract this because Jeonghan didn't even know they existed.... He shivered and quickly hit the back button.

'Please help – should I tell her?'

'I confessed – and she returned my feelings!'

Cute.

'goodbye.'

Not so cute.

'What if I have feelings for two people?'

Perfect.

'Just started coughing up flower petals last night and immediately took to Google, but I can't find anything about people having feelings for two people at once. Should this affect the disease in any way? Does anyone have any experience?'

'I don't know, but you really ought to see a doctor asap....'

'I've scheduled an appointment, but until I see her it's just me and the Internet.'

'Do you remember touching petals that could have been infected in the past week or so?'

'Yeah, just yesterday I noticed some rose petals that seemed out of place, I wanted to inspect them.'

'Just yesterday... and you're already coughing up petals... hul... that's really fast...
I think the more people you have feelings for the quicker the disease spreads.... Please see the doctor soon...'

'Wait, what's the normal time it takes to start showing symptoms?'

'For me it took six days exactly... Please take care of yourself.'

'It was eight days for me....'

Jeonghan felt nauseous.

Locking his phone and quickly making his way to the bathroom, he sat in front of the toilet and practiced breathing.

He'd be okay. He'd get the surgery done on Monday and everything would be okay. He wouldn't have to feel awkward around Jisoo and Seungcheol anymore, and wouldn't be afraid of doing anything to make them uncomfortable anymore, and most importantly he would be okay.

But until then....

Jeonghan leaned over the toilet and heaved.

For lunch, Jeonghan ate toast – again. But this time he was able to keep it down, and with the help of the medicine, he felt well enough to play some video games with Jihoon and Mingyu. Everyone in the dorm had a worried look in their eyes all day, but they did their best to make jokes and keep the atmosphere as lighthearted as possible. But the tension returned late afternoon when Jeonghan dropped his controller to run to the bathroom again, Jisoo following this time.

The petals were red now. It didn't make sense for the flowers to grow so quickly, but then again, nothing about this made sense. It was completely unrealistic, but here Jeonghan was, bent over the toilet vomiting up rose petals for the third time that day.

Jisoo held his hair back and mumbled meaningless comfort, doing his best to help Jeonghan through it. He was really thankful for that.

When he thought he was done, he straightened his back and looked at Jisoo. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

Eyeing the closed door, Jisoo lowered his voice. “May I take a guess?”

This was unexpected.

“A guess?”

“Sorry, this is inappropriate timing, but I've been thinking about it since last night. It's Seungcheol, isn't it?”

Jeonghan stared at Jisoo with wide eyes, but said nothing. How was he completely right, and yet, so utterly wrong at the same time? He wished he would start puking again, just so that he didn't have to answer him.

Jisoo grinned. “I'm right, aren't I?”

Jeonghan shook his head and stared at the floor.

“I don't believe you.”

“Believe whatever you want.” His tone held more venom than intended, but thankfully, Jisoo got the message.

“Sorry, I.... Sorry.”

Jisoo stood up and offered Jeonghan a hand. After pulling the other boy up, however, he didn't let go.

“I... hate seeing you like this. You mean a lot to me. So I'll be right by your side helping you through it, okay?”

Even in a platonic sense, Jeonghan was flustered. Saying stuff like that so outright was really just embarrassing.

Staring at their hands, Jeonghan replied, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.”

Jisoo smiled and let go. “I'll let you clean up now.”

Alone in the bathroom, Jeonghan sighed.

“I love you.”

A/N: hey lads its me... your favorite problematic author here.... updating for the first time in *checks bare wrist* a very long time
i promise i haven't abandoned this fic, in fact i think about it at least once a week, it's just been really difficult to write lately. but i'm trying. i'm also working on something else now, but that's a big project and i'm waiting until that's finished to actually start publishing it. don't wanna make the same mistake twice.. haha...

anyways... y'all heard highlight? god i love performance unit
(btw you can catch me on twitter @ cyaronpop 24/7)