Chapter 4- Stop Asking Me Things

Kris was helping a girl in the back of the classroom who was having trouble with holding the calligraphy pens. I had my hands full passing out supplies to the other students and helping everyone out, even though this was supposed to be the easiest lesson. I guess they all felt nervous around me still. Today they were just practicing drawing lines and writing the alphabet with the pens, so it shouldn’t be too hard. Once the kids had settled down some, I headed back to my desk to work on other things. Classical music was playing from the speakers while the kids worked. Kris came over too, carrying a stool with him to sit on. I paid him no mind as I typed away on my computer.

“Your room is pretty cool,” He said, “Did you draw all that?”
He was pointing at the portraits on the wall. There were some that were people I knew, like my mom, and some were celebrities. They had all been done in black and white and they were hung in neat rows of three by four.

“Yeah, those are old though,” I said.

“I like that one,” He said, pointing at the huge drawing of a cherry blossom tree that hung on the back wall.

“That took me months to finish,” I said, “Thank you”

“You know they used to call me Kriscasso,” He said with a smug look on his face, “I was a great artist”

“Sure you were,” I said sarcastically, giggling beneath my breath, “If I remember correctly you used to ask me to do the drawings for all your projects in 7th grade because you were terrible at drawing”

Kris’s face flushed up and I laughed.

Suddenly, the bell for the end of first class of the day rang. All the kids hurried to put all their art away into their designated cubbies and put all the art supplies back into the drawers and cabinets. Some said good bye to me before running of to their next class and I happily said see you later.

“Being a teacher must be fun huh,” Kris said once the class had emptied out.

“Yes, I really like it,” I said with a small smile.

“There,” He said, pointing at my face.

“What?” I asked.

“That smile just now, it was beautiful,” He said.

I flushed up instantly and turned away before I said, “that was unnecessary”

“But it’s true,” He replied with a shrug.

“I’m going to use the restroom, behave yourself,” I said and he just laughed.

I closed the classroom door behind me and walked towards the ladies staff restroom. On the way there, I bumped into Cam who was on her way to her Mythology class. She grabbed my arm and pulled me close to whisper something.

“Who was that guy outside your classroom earlier? A boyfriend you’ve yet to tell me about?” She asked with a gleam in her eyes.

I shook my head violently before I said, “He’s just a friend of mine”

“The one you were talking to be about before?” She said with a wiggle of her eyebrows and I sighed. “He was pretty cute,” she said before running off to her classroom. I just rolled my eyes. As if I’d ever date that kid.

When I got back to the classroom, Kris was fiddling around on his phone and oblivious to the world. I decided to try and sneak up on him, so I walked quietly over until I was right behind him.

“Boo!” I screamed and he practically leapt 50 feet into the air.

“You scared the hell out of me!” He yelled but I was already laughing with not a single trace of guilt.

“You’re so funny,” I giggled, wiping a tear form the corner of my eye, “I can’t believe you were that surprised”

“I wasn’t expecting you to jump out of nowhere at me,” He said with a sulky expression.

“I’m sorry, but I couldn’t resist,” I laughed, “I’ll make up for it though, lunch on me”

His face brightened up at that.

“When’s lunch for you?” He asked.

“Well I have second period prep so no class and then I have a half hour lunch period, so we can leave in about half an hour if you want, “I replied.

“Sounds good,” He said with a grin, “Can I see more of your art?”

“Sure,” I replied, “I’ll get some for you”

I crouched down to grab the box full of my recent art in it. I kept the box just by my feet and it was kind of heavy, but I managed to carry it onto a desk for him to look at. While he flipped through the drawings, I went back to my desk to work on my self-portrait. I started to draw in the eyes in more detail, making careful and light with my pencil. To me, the eyes were the most important part of the face. Everyone has different eyes that reflect different pasts and different ideas, and they’re the first thing that people notice about each other. That’s why I always took my time when it came to drawing eyes.

“Hey Vivian, what’s this one?” Kris said as he held up a drawing.

I recognized it right away and I wanted to shoot myself on the spot. He was holding up a drawing that I had made a couple months ago. I had drawn the five of us from middle school on our promotion day, but instead of my face I had drawn flowers that grew out of my neck in twisting and ugly spirals with rotting leaves and falling petals. That day wasn’t the best day for me.

“It’s nothing, just a drawing,” I said quickly, taking the picture from his head and sticking it back in the box.

“You’re face is annoyed,” He teased and I just elbowed him, turning away to go back to my work.

“Quit being a distraction,” I mumbled, but he pretended to not hear me.

I tried to concentrate back on the drawing in front of me, moving the lead of the pencil back and forth across the paper. It still didn’t look right. Annoyance started bubbling up inside me and I started chewing my lip. What to do, what to do.

“Something’s bothering you,” Kris said suddenly, his face quite close to mine.

I blinked. “I can tell because your eyebrows are all knit together,” He said, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said irritably.

“Don’t tell me that, I know you’re lying,” He said, “Come on, depend on me a little”

“You don’t have to word it that way,” I said and he just shrugged. “It’s just that I don’t like this self-portrait that’s all,” I sighed.

Kris came over to take a look at it. He stared at it for a while, his honey brown eyes moving up and down the paper. His face was bare of all makeup, which was rare, and his skin looked very soft. A sharp nose, chiseled jaw, eyebrows that were practically identical, and long eyelashes. I didn’t know if he had gotten plastic surgery when he had gone to Korea, but boy was he handsome.

“I think there’s something a little off,” He said finally, “Your nose is too big and your eyes a bit too small, and your hair looks too stiff and dry”

I stared hard at the drawing and sighed. “Thanks Kris, I’m just going to start over,” I said finally, “I don’t like this one”

“Suit yourself,” he said with a shrug when suddenly I heard loud rumbling. Kris’s face flushed instantly and I just hid my giggle behind my hands.

“Let’s go get lunch then,” I said with a laugh, closing the sketchbook and leaving the pencil on top.

The two of us left the classroom and Kris with a skip in his step, I locked it behind us, and walked towards the parking lot where my car was. He told me about his trip to America once for a basketball tournament a couple of years ago and how he got to meet a lot of American stars.

“Things are different in the West compared to Korea,” He said, “Here, you look whatever way and be successful. Many music artists are solo and there are only a few bands”

“Do you wish that you had gone solo in the first place?” I asked.

He paused, thinking, but then he shook his head.

“My memories with those boys will last me for many years to come,” He said with a distant smile, “It was hard and frustrating sometimes, but I learned from it, and without them, I don’t think I could be the person I am today”. “I also met some really great people back then,” He said.

“It must have been nice, being in such a close group with them huh,” I said, and I could not help but think about how are group of friends used to be.

“I had a lot of fun,” He said.

I looked out towards the open road and thought to myself about what Kris had said. I had figured out a long time ago that no one is perfect; that no matter how hard I worked I could never be perfect. I have all these flaws, but I have strengths as well. One weakness