They were back at Leo’s studio because it would be awkward for them to talk on the street side. Leo opened his studio room, suddenly feeling conscious of his room’s state. He hadn’t cleaned up the place, thinking he would do it after coming back from a walk. Ravi walked inside while side stepping the mess on his floor with a raised brow but didn’t say anything. Ravi flopped himself down on the sofa in that room, the one that N insisted having in his studio room so he could lounge himself there while Leo worked. Leo stood unsurely in the middle of the room because it just felt weird to sit beside Ravi for now.

“Tell me now.” Ravi said simply.

Leo heaved out a sigh and walked to the window, staring out from it.

“Did I do something wrong?” Ravi asked as he walked to stand beside Leo.

Leo shook his head immediately and bit his lip, trying to find the right words.

“Then why?”

“It’s just that, N told me something the other day.” Leo started cautiously. Ravi waited for him patiently.

“He told me that…you liked me.” Leo whispered the last part and he could felt Ravi tensed up beside him. Closing his eyes, Leo decided to talk just honestly about how he felt.

“I thought it was impossible too but I couldn’t take the risk. I wasn’t ready for something like that and if I led you on it will only hurt you. I wouldn’t want to hurt you, Ravi-ah, you were too nice for that.”

The room was silence for a while. Leo didn’t dare to look at Ravi’s expression so he choosed to gaze outside while waiting. After some time, Ravi finally let out a big sigh.

“So, it was because of this?” Ravi asked, his voice didn’t give away any emotion.

“Yeah.” Leo answered timidly, still avoiding eye contact.

“Leo, look at me.” Ravi sounded stern enough that Leo didn’t dare to disobey him. They were staring at each other. Leo was used to read people from their expression since he didn’t like to talk but there were too many emotions in Ravi’s eyes that he didn’t know how to read them.

“I have to admit that I was attracted to you from the first time I saw you. You have this feeling that made me want to know you more. When I saw those sadness in your eyes, I want to help erased them for you.” Leo gasped in surprised at Ravi’s statement.

“But then tell me, weren’t those feelings normal even between some very close friends? I’m not even sure of my own feelings now but one thing for sure, I want to be your friend Leo-ah.” There were some desperation at the end of Ravi’s statement and it made Leo felt guilty.

“I’m sorry Ravi-ah; I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.” Leo said apologetically.

“It’s alright. So are we good now?” Ravi asked with a small smile.

“Yeah.” Leo answered softly and unconsciously let out a small tiny smile that he didn’t realize.

“But…” Ravi said so suddenly that it startled Leo. Ravi walked closer to him which made Leo felt nervous.

“I’m not sure I won’t in the future.” Ravi said in a whisper, his gaze was different.

“Won’t what?” Leo asked nervously.

“Fall for you.” Ravi whispered right beside his ear.

Leo, who was shocked, immediately pushed Ravi away from him, while trying to calm his heartbeat.  He looked at Ravi who was grinning mischieviously and it made him felt annoyed.

“Yah! Don’t make a joke like that.”

“Okay, okay, sorry but you’re so fun to tease.” Ravi said with a small smirk.

“Don’t think too much.” Ravi said while he ruffled Leo’s hair. Leo bit his lips at the affectionate gesture.

“So…I see work hadn’t been easy.”Ravi commented while he looked around the messy room. Leo could only hung his head in embarrasement.

“It was the same for me too.” Ravi said and this perked up Leo’s attention. So Ravi had been feeling the same with him.

“Let’s go out for fresh air.” Ravi stated suddenly and Leo was surprised when Ravi took his hand and pulled him out of his work room.

“Eh…where?”

“Anywhere, the weather was nice anyway.”

Both of them exited from the back door and that’s when Leo realized something important.

“How do we go?”

“I brought my car. Did you forget?” Ravi asked confused at Leo’s question. Meanwhile, Leo started to tremble when he heard that they’re going with car. Memory of that night flashed through his mind and he felt like he’s being suffocated. Ravi who noticed this immediately tried to shake Leo out of his current state.

“Leo, listen to me. You have to come back.”

Ravi’s voice sounded like they came from a far away place. Leo tried to locate where it came from but all he could heard was the sound of car’s wheel screeched and a loud crash. And then he could heard Ravi’s voice clearly.

“Leo, look at me.”

Leo finally snapped back and the first thing he realized was that he was looking straight at Ravi’s eyes. His black orbs showed worry and another emotion that Leo couldn’t quite decipher yet. The second thing he noticed though, was the position they were in. Ravi was holding his face and they were standing close enough to be misunderstood by other people. Two girls who just came out from the boutique whispered and giggled at them. Leo could feel his cheeks heated up and he quickly let go from Ravi.

“Sorry.” Leo apologized while bowing his head in shame.

“Don’t you think we’ve encountered this situation a little too often?” Ravi said but he didn’t sound blaming.

“I’m s-“Before Leo could finish his sentence Ravi had cut him.

“Shush.” Ravi lifted his hand and brought it near Leo’s face. Leo was startled and could only blinked in shock. Then Ravi gently swiped tear’s track from his face, heck he didn’t even realize he had been crying.

“I must’ve been cursed for you to cry everytime we met.” Ravi joked a bit but it only made Leo felt guiltier. How many times already that Ravi had to deal with his mess while he didn’t even know what’s going on? He felt bad for leaving Ravi in the dark but would he had the courage to tell everything?

“Ravi I-“ Leo’s sentence was once again cut off by Ravi.

“Let’s find somewhere less crowded.”

It was the day that Taekwoon was discharged from the hospital. His family and Hakyeon came to pick him up from the hospital. Taekwoon was standing nervously in front of the door while his mother was inside to fill some form and his father was outside taking his bag to the car. Hakyeon was standing beside him.

“It was good you’re finally getting out, woon-ah.” Hakyeon turned to smile at his friend but he was met with the sight of a very pale Taekwoon.

“Woon-ah, are you alright? Do you feel sick again? Should I call the doctor?”

“N-no, I’m alright.” Taekwoon said finally but his voice was shaking. Hakyeon began to worry but he tried to brush it off because Taekwoon said he was fine.

“Tell me if you feel anything okay?”

Taekwoon only nod in reply and continue to stare at the car. Hakyeon followed Taekwoon’s gaze and he was starting to afraid that his prediction might be true.

“Well, everything was finished. Let’s head back home now.” His mother said and they all moved together toward his father who was waiting in the car.

When they was near the car, Taekwoon started to hyperventilated. His mind was suddenly black and all he could hear was the sound of car’s screeching and a loud bang. Then he could see Jaehwan lying there in his seat, with blood everywhere in his body. That’s when he started to scream. His family and Hakyeon tried to stop him but he couldn’t hear any single words they said. Taekwoon was sobbing and he kept on calling to Jaehwan’s name.The doctor finally came to calm him down and told his parent that he was having a phobia because of the accident. Since then he had never rode in a car anymore.

Ravi ended up leading him to the park that they first came together. He just realized that it was only a few blocks distance from his boutique. They sat together in silence while enjoying the breeze. Ravi was the first one to break the silence.

“So you couldn’t ride in a car?”

“Yeah.”

“So how did you go out all this time?”

 “I either walked or took the bus.”

“Oh…okay.”

“Aren’t you gonna ask why?” Leo asked in confusion.

“I told you already, I’ll wait until you’re ready to tell me everything.” Ravi was gazing at him intently while he said that and Leo didn’t know how to look away from those eyes.

“Thanks.” Ravi only hummed in response and they were back to silence.

The silence was once again broken as Ravi’s phone rang. He took out his phone from his pocket and stared at the screen for a while before putting it on the bench. The phone kept on ringing for a few times and everytimes Ravi only looked at the screen without picking it up. Leo was starting to feel curious with what was happening.

“Aren’t you gonna pick it up?” Leo finally asked after the phone started to ring again for the fifth times.

“I don’t want to end this so quickly.” Ravi muttered but he was gazing at the distance and Leo didn’t understand what he said. After a while Ravi seemed to have come back from his thought and he put his phone back inside his pocket.

“I guess I have to go now.”

“Okay.”

“Come on, I’ll walk you back.” Ravi stood up from his seat and waited for Leo.

“No, you seemed to be in a hurry. You should go first.”

“How could I leave you alone, what if you get lost?” Ravi said with a teasing smirk.

“I’m not a child.” Leo huffed in annoyance but he decided not to drag the time and just follow Ravi.

“Leo, you just told me that you only walked all this time. That meant you’ve never came all this way far right?”

“Yeah, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t find the way back on my own.” Leo said still with a frown and Ravi only chuckled at him.

“You’re cute.”

“Shut up.” Leo glared at Ravi while the latter laughed.

Before long, they had been back at his boutique and Leo noticed that the sun was going to set soon.

“See you soon.” Ravi said and jogged to his car.

11.00 p.m

Leo had just came back home from his boutique. He had been too focused on his work that he didn’t notice that it was already so late. N did texted him earlier to ask if he had eaten but since the other man was too busy in the dance studio he couldn’t come to the boutique. He decided to just heated something from the fridge since it was already too late anyway to cook something. Taking out yesterday’s pasta leftover and putting it in the microwave, he decided to take a shower first.

After a shower, Leo was just going to eat when he checked his phone and realized that messages have came in when he was in the shower.

From: Ravi

Sorry bout earlier, something came up.

From: N

Leo-ah, did you come home yet?

Leo took his phone with him and ate while replying those messages.

To: N

Yeah, I did.

To: Ravi

It’s okay, don’t feel bad.

From: N

Great, I’m going to go home now. See you later Leo~~ J

Leo checked his other message but Ravi hadn’t replied him yet. After done eating, he washed the dishes and decided to prepare to go to bed. Just then his phone flashed, indicating a new message.

From: Ravi

Should I make up for it?

To: Ravi

Huh?

Another moment then, his phone flashed again, this time it showed that Ravi was calling. Leo picked it up and put the phone on his ear while lying on his bed.

“Hello?”

“Did I disturb your sleep? You sounded sleepy.”

“Huh? No, I was just tired.”

“Leo, remember when I told you that I’m a composer?”

“Yeah.”

“You said you would like to listen to them someday.” This statement perked Leo’s attention and he immediately got up from bed.

“You’ll let me?” Leo asked in disbelief. He could hear Ravi chuckled on the other line.

“Look who’s excited.”

“Sorry.” Leo bit his lips to avoid sounding too excited but he was truly feeling static that Ravi would let him heard his song.

“It’s alright. Good to know that you like it. So, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you okay with this Sunday?”

“Yeah.” Another chuckle was heard.

“Stop answering just yeah. I’ll pick you up near your boutique.”

“But…” Leo hestitated for a moment at the word ‘pick’.

“Don’t worry; I’ll take care of it. Now go to sleep, you sounded like I didn’t let you sleep for weeks.”

“Ravi…” Leo could feel the corner of his mouth turning up, luckily Ravi wasn’t going to see it.

“Hm…”

Leo lied down again on his bed, still holding the phone to his ear while facing his ceiling.

“Are you sleeping?” Ravi whispered softly from the line.

“No.” Leo felt himself whispering back.

“Aren’t you going to hang up?”

“You called first so you should.”

“I’ll wait until you sleep.”

“Your phone bill will be expensive.”

After another moment of silence, Ravi started to hum softly to an unknown song and Leo could felt his eyes closed on its own. Was it a song that Ravi wrote? Why did the song sounded so sad? Did he write it based on his own experience? Leo could feel himself getting sleepier and he could hear Ravi saying something but he was too sleepy to listen to them. Before long, he fell asleep and the line had been hung up. It was one of the rare nights that he didn’t get a nightmare.

Leo walked in the café grumpily and took a seat at his favorite spot beside the window. The morning air was chilled enough that not may people was walking outside.

“Hi, hyung. Not in the mood today, huh?” Hongbin asked as he approached Leo’s table to take his order and noticed Leo’s more than usual grumpy mode. He could only guess it had something to do with N hyung.

“N…” Leo mumbled angryly.

“Well, what did N hyung do again?” Hongbin chuckled as his prediction was correct. Leo was about to open his mouth to answer when another worker called out Hongbin’s name.

“Oh, crap. I better go see what’s up. Usual, right hyung?”

Leo nodded in reply and Hongbin immediately rushed to whoever that called him just now. Leo was back to his thought and he couldn’t help feeling a bit annoyed at this morning’s incident.

“Leo~ wakes up. Let’s eat breakfast together since yesterday I couldn’t eat dinner with you.”

Leo could feel someone pulled at his blanket but he was to o sleepy to respond. After all, the weather was cold and this is the first time in so long that he had such a good sleep. Who could posibly come to disturb him? Well, it could only be one person, N.

“Leo~”

“Just let me sleep.” Leo mumbled and pulled his blanket to cover himself once more. But N wouldn’t give up and kept on trying to release the blanket which Leo was now holding on to tightly.

“Come on. It was morning already.” N tried to persuade again but Leo wouldn’t budge from his spot.

“What time?”

“7 a.m.”

Leo groaned at the answer and decided to ignore N. Why should he wake at such ungodly hour? Meanwhile N, who didn’t take no as an answer, tried again another method to wake Leo. He pulled harder and succeeded to pull the blanket halfway from Leo. That’s when he realized that Leo’s phone was burried beside him. Since when did Leo sleep with his phone beside him? N glanced at Leo but was kind of relieved that the other was still asleep. Well, looking a bit won’t hurt anyone right? N opened the phone and was a little surprised at the words on the screen.

‘Call ended - Ravi’

Was Leo calling Ravi last night? And he slept while taking the call? N blinked rapidly still couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

“Leo-ah, did you have a phone call with Ravi last night?”

“Huh?” Leo mumbled while still closing his eyes. What phone call?

“This on your phone.” N said while shaking Leo to look at his phone.

“I told you don’t open my phone as you like.” Leo groaned aas he started to feel annoyed at N.

“Come on Leo.”

Leo finally gave up as it seemed that N won’t give up anymore. He sleepily sat up and was shoved with his phone right at his face. He tried to blink away the sleepiness while trying to see the screen. When he was awake enough to understand the situation, he could only groaned in frustation. Great, now N wouldn’t just leave him alone at all.

“What about it?” Leo challenged while snatching his phone back.

“Since when are you comfortable enough with Ravi to sleep while talking to him?” N asked, his eyes gleeming with something that Leo hated the most, curiosity.

“I didn’t.”

“Then what’s this Leo?” N asked again with a slight smirk.

“Go away.” Leo said with annoyance while trying to go back to sleep.

“Aha! Don’t try to avoid me Jung Leo.” N said sternly and pulled Leo up again.

“What again?” Leo glared at N.

“Are you close with Ravi?”

“No.”

“Since when did you two become close?”

“…”

“Wait, did you two really just have known each other? You didn’t lie to me and actualy have known for a long time right”

Leo sighed and rubbed his temple, he could feel a headache coming.

“Stop it N.”

“Come on Leo-ah, you could tell me everything.”

“There’s nothing between me and Ravi.” Leo said tiredly.

N looked like he wanted to ask some more questions but stopped when he saw the look that Leo gave him. Well, he decided to give up for now.

“Okay then, but if you’ve got something tell me immediately okay?” N said while raising his eyebrow suggestively. Leo, who got annoyed, kicked him off the bed.

“Ouch! That’s mean Leo.” N whinned while rubbing his .

“Leave me alone N-ah.” Leo said and lied down again while closing his eyes.

“I’ll come back later for breakfast.” N said and finally Leo could hear the sound of door closed.

Leo opened his eyes again while pondering too, how did he fall asleep yesterday? He remembered that Ravi was humming to a song before he was asleep. Did he really fell asleep just by a simple hum? And now to think of it, his sleep yesterday was so calm and he didn’t remembered that he had any nightmare. Why did Ravi had such effect on him?

His thought this morning was so hectic that he couldn’t get back to sleep again. Now he was feeling so sleepy and annoyed. Maybe he shouldn’t think so much about it. Just then, Hongbin came back right on time to bring his coffee.

“Here hyung.” Hongbin placed the cup in front of him.

“Thanks Hongbin-ah.” Leo immediately took a sip of his coffee.

After Hongbin was gone to tend to another customer, Leo was back on his own and he was gazing outside when suddenly a voice startled him.

“Hi Leo hyung.” A cheery voice came from in front of him.

Leo freezed when he saw who was sitting right in front of him now.

‘It wasn’t Jaehwan, Leo-ah. Get your sense back.’

“Emm, it’s not a good entrance I guess?” Ken said nervously while he saw Leo’s expression.

“It’s okay.” Leo said after a while when he realized Ken was still looking nervous. Ken immediately brightened up again when he heard Leo.

“I was just walking around when I saw you inside here hyung, so I decided to come in too. It seemed you really like coffee hyung.”

“Yeah.”

“Hyung, you know….”

Leo waited up for Ken to spill out what he wanted to say but after a while he became frustated when Ken didn’t continue his sentence.

“What?”

Ken was smiling nervously and he was fumbling with his fingers.

“Remember bout the interview hyung? I was thinking…if you could do it now. But of course you could just refuse it hyung, hehe.” Ken laughed at the end of his sentence but it was obvious that he fake them.

Leo stared at Ken’s face but the latter refused to look at him in the eye. That’s when Leo realized something must’ve come up for Ken.

“What happened?” Leo asked straightforwadly and it seemed like Ken was caught off guard. He gaped for a while before coming back to his sense. Finally, he let out a bigh sigh.

“Actually hyung, my boss well, he wasn’t very happy that I postponed the task for this long. He was considering canceling this project but I’m trying hard to convince him to give me some more time. He gave me a last deadline by the end of this week.” Ken explained and he looked dejected.

Leo immediately felt bad for him. He kept on thinking that he wasn’t ready for the interview and maybe he should waited but he forgot about Ken. The other must’ve had a hard time because of him.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright hyung. Don’t feel bad, I understand about your situation hyung.”

“Let’s do it.” Leo finally decided.

“What?” Ken was a bit shock at Leo’s sudden decision.

“Hyung, don’t do it because you feel bad for me. I don’t want to force you hyung.” Ken said with guilt.

“It’s okay. I’ll try it.”

“Are you sure hyung?”

“Yeah.”

“Uhmm, is this Saturday okay hyung?” Ken asked his eyes gleaming with hope.

Leo pondered a bit. He already made a plan with Ravi on that day. But Ravi hadn’t told him what time and maybe he could finish the interview quickly before Ravi came for him.

“Is it okay if I do it in the morning at my work room?”

“Sure hyung, it’s up to you. I’ll come in the early morning.” Ken said enthustiatically.

“Well, maybe not so early hyung, hehe.” Ken said after he noticed Leo’s glare.

Leo was waiting for Ken axiously inside his work room. He had received a call from Ken 10 minutes ago saying that he would come soon. These past few days he had been so concentrated on his work that he hadn’t thought the interview at all. And it seemed he wasn’t the only one busy as he noticed that N rarely bothered him anymore about the phone call matter. They only met for breakfast and sometimes dinner when both of them left work early and N sure looked tired enough these past few days. He had told Leo that he was preparing for a dance competition and Leo knew N would work himself extra hard for it. He haven’t told N about the interview because knowing N, he would want to tag along for Leo, but he couldn’t take N away from his practice knowing how near the competition was. So he had to face the interview alone for now.

Ravi had called him yesterday to tell him that he’ll come around noon. Leo was relieved to hear that. It meant that he could finish his interview before Ravi came. He was nervous because it will be the second time for him to meet Ken alone just the two of them. And the first time was a total disaster, lets say that. He wasn’t sure what would happen to him. Every single of Ken’s action reminded him of Jaehwan even though deep down he knew they were nothing alike. On the other hand, whenever he’s with Ravi, he never thought about Jaehwan at all. They had a complete opposte effect on him and he needed someone to anchor him, to remind him of the reality. He did consider calling Ravi to come early so he could join the interview but he hesitated for so long and finally gave up on the idea. Ravi looked like he had a lot of things to be done and Leo didn’t want to bother him anymore than he had.
 

In the end he was alone for this, wheter he was ready or not. Taking a deep breath, he tried to think that it’ll be over soon and was a little startled when he heard a knock.

“Hi hyung.” Ken’s head was peeking a little from the door.

“Come in.”

Leo stood from his desk and moved to sit on the couch. Ken let himself in and he decided to sit infront of Leo. Ken started to rumaged through his bag and took out a notebook and a pen.

“Well, let’s start hyung.”

Leo only gave a nod to indicate that he agreed.

“Well, let’s start from something light hyung. Because I promised N hyung there wouldn’t bee any questions regarding personal information so we’ll skip that, hyung.”

“Uhmm, first, when did you wanted to be a designer hyung?”

“In high school.” Leo asnwered a bit later.

“Was it always your dream to be a designer hyung?”

Leo paused to think about the question. He remembered the sunrays burning his skin, the smell of grass and ground, the feel of sweat that stained his shirt.

“No.”

“What is your dream hyung?” Ken asked curiously but Leo didn’t look at him.

“I’m sorry to say that the injury on Taekwoon’s leg was too severe. We could only preserve it but there were no ways to heal it back again.  He shouldn’t use his leg too hard anymore.”

“Did you mean that he couldn’t play anymore, doctor?”

“Not on the team anymore, but he could still play it for fun once in awhile after he recover.”

“What do we do? He would be broken if he knew this.”

“I’m really sorry, we had tried our best.”

Leo spaced out for a moment. He could feel that Ken’s eyes were on him, waiting for his answer.

“There’s none.”

Ken looked a bit shocked at Leo’s answer.

“It must be sad hyung, to live without a dream.” Ken said and he looked at Leo with pity. Leo didn’t notice it though. He was stunned to hear what Ken had just said. Jaehwan had said the same thing to him once. He didn’t realize that he was brought back to another one of his memories.

Taekwoon and Jaehwan was sitting and leaning on the big tree in their school. They always came here in rest period to meet each other as they’re in different classes.

“Hyung, what’s your dream?” Jaehwan asked out of curiosity as they didn’t have anythiong to do.

There was a pause before Taekwoon asnwered the question.

“I used to want to be a soccer player, playing in the national team.” Leo said queitly. Jaehwan gazed at him and waited patiently for Taekwoon to continue.

“Then…then when I was in middle school, there was an accidednt.” Taekwoon continued and he could see realization in jaehwan’s eyes.

“They told me that my leg was severly injured and I couldn’t play anymore.” Taekwoon gazed back at Jaehwan, his eyes showing sadness.

“I’m sorry hyung.” Jaehwan whispered feeling bad.

“Don’t be, Jaehwan-ah.” Taekwoon said to comfort the other and they were silence for a while.

“Since then I never thought to have any dream anymore.”

“It was so sad hyung, to live without a dream.” Jaehwan’s said and then looking intently at Taekwoon.

“There were no goals, no determination and no feeling like you had to work hard for that dream. It felt like you just live everyday without knowing where to go. Didn’t you feel lonely to live like that hyung?” Jaehwan asked sadly.

Taekwoon was stunned to hear what Jaehwan said. It shook him so much that everything Jaehwan said was true.

“What was your dream Jaehwan-ah?” Taekwoon asked back.

“I want to be a cartoonist hyung.” Jaehwan said with a grin and Taekwoon couldn’t help but smiled along with him. Jaehwan always that effect on him.

“Hyung, why don’t you be a designer?” Jaehwan said out of the blue, shocking Taekwoon.

“I’ve seen a few of your sketches hyung and they’re good.”

“I just drew them because I’m bored.” Taekwoon said with a flusehd face.

“Still, you should try it hyung. “ Jaehwan said while half pleading.

“Okay.” Taekwoon agreed after some time, beside he wouldn’t hurt anyone by trying right? Jaehwan was delighted with Taekwoon’s decision.

“Hyung, promise me you’ll make your first cloth for me okay? Since I gave you the idea.” Jaehwan said jokingly with a smile.

“Sure, I promise.” Taekwoon smiled back and took Jaehwan’s hand in his.

Leo didn’t realize that he was spacing out again and Ken looked worriedly at him. And then he felt a hand on his shoulder and he could hear Ravi’s voice bringing him back.

“Leo, you need to come back.”

Leo turned and looked up to see Ravi looking at him with an intense gaze. Leo could only thought of one thing: Why was Ravi here so early?

Here's for everyone who had waited patiently for an update

Please enjoy the new chapter :)