His fist hovered over their door, hesitating, and Seungcheol wondered for the near-hundredth time if this was a good idea, if he really wanted to deal with all this drama so early in the damn morning-

-when the door swung open and a familiar face stared up at him, expression decidedly unamused.

"Seungcheol-hyung." Jihoon said dryly, red backpack fitting snugly over both shoulders and his single eyebrow raise speaking volumes. "What brings you here, at-" He paused, glancing at his watch and if possible his eyebrow went even higher. "-7 am in the morning?"

And, as always, when faced with the pink-haired music major, Choi Seungcheol was forced to assume the guise of a senseless, blabbering idiot.

"Well, I don't know if you noticed, but on second thought you obviously would have, being you, but Jisoo had to go out last night because I called him because Jeonghan got drunk and high and all sorts of things at a party and Jisoo was the first person I thought of and-" The words fell in a rush from his lips, to the point they were near-garbled, and Jihoon immediately raised a hand to cut off any more yammering.

"Jisoo-hyung is still asleep. As you said, he'd gotten in late last night and he just so happens to have an exam this afternoon." Jihoon didn't want to snap at him (well...maybe a small part of him did), but he acknowledged that it wasn't entirely Seungcheol's fault.

Jihoon let out a noisy exhale, seeing the older boy's crestfallen expression at his words, and he struggled for patience he didn't feel. Not at that moment. "I know you were just looking out for a friend." He spoke tiredly, his gaze focused on the tops of Seungcheol's shoes, unable to meet the elder in the eye. "But-" He squared his shoulders, his face suddenly fierce as his chin tilted out stubbornly. "-I'm looking out for my friend as well."

"He's my friend too." It was a weak argument, petulantly delivered, the first thing that came to Seungcheol's mind. He could tell from the look on Jihoon's face that he was wholly unimpressed with the response, the other boy's lips pursed in irritation.

"That's why I came over. I have to talk to Jisoo about all of this. Him and Jeonghan. Hell, our whole ing group dynamic-" He didn't realize his tone was getting louder and louder until Jihoon's hand shot out and grabbed his wrist-

-and Seungcheol couldn't help the surprise he felt or the flush that crept up the back of his neck.

"I get it, Seungcheol-hyung. I get it." Jihoon gentled his tone as much as he could, eyes softening slightly. While he didn't not agree completely with the other boy's method, he could understand his sentiments. "I have to head off to class, but you're welcome to wait in the living room for Jisoo-hyung to wake up." As he spoke, he stepped out of the doorway, finally releasing his hold on the Seungcheol's wrist.

"Good luck." Jihoon said in lieu of a farewell, but as he walked away he couldn't help but feel a pair of eyes burning holes into his back.

"Jeonghan-hyuuung." A voice sang from somewhere above him, utterly familiar though he couldn't quite place who it belonged to. Not at that moment.

"Jeonghan-hyung, you'll be late for class." The speaker's tone became agitated, and Jeonghan wasn't entirely sure but did he hear some Chinese words thrown in as well?

"Hyung!" That single exclamation, coupled with a desperate tug on his sheets had Jeonghan jerking out of sleep, his squawk of protest at odds with his refined looks (but totally consistent with his personality.)

"A few more minutes, Minghao." He whined, though he was the elder of the two boys. Minghao hesitated, debating internally with himself for a few heartbeats, before he shook his head firmly.

"No, hyung. You can't miss class again." Minghao injected some pleading into his tone. His elder only groaned in response, throwing his arms over his face in frustration. He was just so ing tired. And following that whole debacle with Jisoo last night - the fact he was reduced to relying on his ex for help...

Minghao continued to watch him, with a quiet, single-minded focus that had Jeonghan rolling his eyes slightly at first, but soon it transformed into a smile of weary affection, as he reached out to ruffle the boy's honey brown locks with his free hand. "I get it, I get it. I'm up already, Minghao." He said softly. "Thank you."

Jeonghan watched as his roommate nodded, relief clear in his expression, before he stood up and walked over to his own half of the room. He's getting so tall, Jeonghan thought absentmindedly, watching the younger boy as he busied himself with getting ready for class. He was probably already taller than Jis-

-he shut down that thought before he could finish it, and with a grunt of utter frustration Jeonghan hauled himself out of bed. He thanked the gods that the room did not spin out of control as he walked towards his desk, though he could have also done without the incessant headache and foul-tasting breath.

"Will I see you at lunch later?" Jeonghan glanced up at Minghao's query, shrugging lightly in response.

"We'll see~" He sang vaguely, grabbing various things from the desk and placing them on his bed. Phone, books, wallet- the list rattled off in his head. "I may have plans with some friends, but it's not confirmed yet. I'll definitely let you know."

Jeonghan had his back to him as he spoke, so he didn't see the way Minghao's expression shuttered for a moment, his bright eyes dimming ever so slightly.

"Yeah, ok." He spoke, voice soft. "See you hyung."

He was pacing, back and forth, back and forth, and Seungcheol wondered for a moment what Jihoon would do to him if he got home and found a hole worn through his precious carpet.

There mere thought caused a visceral shudder to go through his frame, and Seungcheol decided that sitting would be a totally serviceable second option right about then.

His fingers played with the hem of his shirt as he plopped himself down on the couch, and as he sank down into the rich leather, he took some time to observe his surroundings.

He'd never really noticed before, but Jisoo and Jihoon's place was considerably well-appointed, especially for a pair of college students. They had a fully-stocked kitchen, a small entertainment system, hell even a small corner devoted to Jihoon's instruments, along with Jisoo's acoustic guitar.

He remembered once, in passing, that Jeonghan had mentioned to him that Jisoo's family was loaded (seriously loaded), but the other boy had said it in such an offhand tone that Seungcheol had thought nothing of it then.

...

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Jeonghan slipped into the seat beside him, his voice hushed so not to be heard over their professor's droning lecture.

"What's up?" Seungcheol's gaze didn't leave the screen of his phone, so he didn't catch the struggle in Jeonghan's expression before the boy spoke again.

"What do you think I should get Jisoo for our anniversary?"

Seungcheol snorted lightly, giving him a sideways glance. "Really? You're asking me?"

Jeonghan let out a frustrated sigh, slumping down onto the desk, pressing his face against the wood. "Yes, I'm asking you." He spoke, voice muffled. "I was thinking of getting him a watch, but to be honest I don't have that kind of money."

"A watch? The hell Jeonghan, what are you guys? Married?" A student one row ahead of them turned and glared in their direction, and Seungcheol shot him an apologetic look before turning once more to his friend. "Seriously, Jeonghan why would you ever consider getting him something that expensive?"

It was only now did Seungcheol realize how quiet Jeonghan got after that conversation, how his expression turned hooded, guarded. When the day of their anniversary had rolled around, Seungcheol saw him clutching a small package to his chest, worrying at the corner of the gift with his fingers.

...

"Seungcheol? What are you doing here?"

A bleary-eyed, pajama-clad Jisoo shuffled into the living room, his voice filled with utter confusion as he stared at the dark-haired boy. Seungcheol instinctively shot up from his comfortable position on the couch, and though he offered Jisoo a bright grin, the way his fingers twisted together at the front of his jeans revealed the true state of his nerves.

"Can't I come to visit a friend in the wee hours of the morning?" It was a feeble attempt at humor, and from the way Jisoo eyed him doubtfully, the younger boy didn't buy into it at all.

"Well, okay then. If you say so." Jisoo shrugged lightly, ignoring the open-mouthed gape Seungcheol afforded him at his blasé reply. There was only one reason that could have brought the elder to his doorway at such an inconvenient time, and the longer he could put off that conversation by acting ignorant, he would.

"Have you eaten breakfast?" Jisoo continued blithely, striding towards their small kitchen. He already began pulling out ingredients from the refrigerator; eggs, milk, syrup - the list rattled off in his head.

"While your offer of food sounds quite promising-" Seungcheol couldn't help but eye Jisoo's hands as he began cooking, his mouth watering at the mere scent of it. "-it won't distract me, Jisoo." Seungcheol leaned his elbows against the counter, trying to meet the other boy's gaze. All his attempts were studiously ignored. "I came here to talk about you and Jeonghan."

(he said it so easily, or that's how it appeared to Jisoo. You and Jeonghan - as if that was what they still were. As if that was what they still could be.)

"Alright then. What about Jeonghan-" Jisoo swallowed, trying desperately to pretend saying his name didn't affect him. Not one bit, not at all. "-and I?" There was an uncharacteristic challenge to his tone, and from Seungcheol's startled expression, the other boy thought it was unlike him as well.

"Are you really going to leave things like this, Jisoo?" All the things he could have said, all the things he thought of saying - he'd spent the entire time walking to their apartment going through his speech in his head - and that was what he blurted out. And from Jisoo's deer-in-the-headlights expression, the other boy wasn't expecting it at all. 

"Seriously Jisoo-" In for a penny, in for a pound. "-when I first heard you guys broke up, I thought Seungkwan was joking. Really. How many years have you two been together?" 4 and a half, Jisoo's mind prompted silently. "And even before that, how long have you loved Jeonghan?" Since the freshman year of high school, when he volunteered to show the awkward new kid around. "You're both so clearly in love that you've become an institution in the University." Now that conjured a memory, Jeonghan grinning up at him as a group of girls tried to pretend they weren't watching...

...then the blonde had tugged him closer for a kiss.

"And to those that know you, the people who are close to you - they can see how completely right you are for each other. You're endgame."  

Seungcheol barely stopped for a breath between his words, and he wanted to grab Jisoo's shoulders over the counter and shake them when the other boy didn't say anything in reply. In turn, Jisoo's mind was racing, a cascade of memories, of moments flashing in his mind's eye - the scent of Jeonghan's hair after he'd taken a shower, the way his hand would always rest at the curve of Jisoo's hip, the silent conversations they had with gaze alone...

"There are some things you don't know, Seungcheol-" Jisoo finally spoke, but he was just as quickly cut off.

"-everyone has issues, Jisoo. You can get over them." Seungcheol insisted, and by this point he was leaning over the counter, his expression completely adamant. "I've heard about it from Jeonghan, and you can work it out, talk it over, I'm absolutely, one hundred percent certain of that fact." 

"I know you're best friends with Jeonghan, Seungcheol-" Once, long ago, Jisoo had felt somewhat uneasy about their closeness, to the point it hurt whenever he saw them together, but when he finally had the courage to bring it up, Jeonghan was quick to put aside his fears. You're it for me, Jisoo. Then, now, forever. He'd grinned then, smugly, and Jisoo just had to smother his stupid, beautiful face with a pillow.

"-but he doesn't tell you everything." Seungcheol couldn't help but jerk back at that statement, and in turn Jisoo couldn't help but feel incredibly guilty. 

"Sorry, that was uncalled for." He murmured, and when Seungcheol nodded quietly, his expression filled with understanding, Jisoo felt his heart lift up somewhat. "It's just that-" 

"-you're both such different people now, and you guys don't know how to work your way around that." Jisoo's eyes snapped up, and though he heard Seungcheol's voice he knew who the words belonged to. "You both want to figure this out, but you can't work your way through it if you both stubbornly cling to each other." He smiled, somewhat sadly. "Jeonghan can be surprisingly insightful, sometimes." 

"Not just sometimes." The response came automatically, and when Seungcheol raised a brow, Jisoo merely flushed and looked away. 

There was a moment of silence, broken only by the clink of utensils and the soft sizzle of oil on the pan. "So..." Seungcheol finally ventured, tilting his head as he stared at Jisoo. "You never answered my question. Are you really going to leave things like this?" He asked quietly.

Vulnerable, that was the only way Seungcheol could have described the look Jisoo showed him - an expression he often saw mirrored on his best friend's face these days, when he didn't realize Seungcheol was looking.

"I don't know." 

"Well, well someone's up bright and early for class, and this is despite getting wasted the previous night. Good for you, hyung." Jeonghan made a face at the boy who spoke, slapping him on the arm for good measure, before sliding into the empty seat next to him. "Shut it, Mingyu. I'm not in the mood." 

"Testy, testy." But the other boy's grin was genuine as he slung an arm over Jeonghan's shoulder, bumping his hip lightly against his. "Seriously though - how's my favorite hyung? I felt like I haven't seen you in ages."

"You were there at the party last night." Jeonghan pointed out dryly, but his expression soon softened, and he briefly pressed his forehead against Mingyu's shoulder, seeking comfort. "Then again, you were pretty wrapped up in Wonwoo-" His tone took on a teasing lilt. "-so it's not difficult to imagine you not noticing me." 

"Oh, I'll always notice you, hyung." He could say such words so easily to Jeonghan, when they didn't carry anything more than simple, platonic affection. "But that party didn't count, and you know it." Besides, you were intoxicated for most of it. He left that part unsaid. 

"Can't a man grieve the end of his 4 and a half year relationship alone and in peace?" It was a thoughtless joke, and from the look on Mingyu's face, it wasn't well received. Not at all. "Sorry, I'm still somewhat hungover so you're going to have to deal with bitter Jeonghan for a while." He tried for a smile, but it just fell short of his eyes. 

Mingyu clearly thought so as well as he squeezed Jeonghan's shoulder, trying to offer solace in a way he couldn't with words. "It's ok, hyung. You don't have to pretend for my sake." He spoke softly. "But if you want to talk about it, I'm always ready to listen." The serious expression on the younger boy's face told Jeonghan he meant every word of it, and at that the blonde couldn't help but chuckle, reaching up to pinch his cheek gently.

"Awww...who's a sweetheart?" He cooed, almost bursting into laughter upon seeing Mingyu's disgruntled face.

"I was trying to be serious, hyung." The younger boy whined, bottom lip jutting out in a pout, and Jeonghan knew he wouldn't appreciate this at all but still he reached up with both hands and smushed them against Mingyu's cheeks.

"Sweetheart." He pronounced him, heart light for the first time in the past few days. "I should have come to you sooner, Mingyu." He said jokingly. "No one can be sad in the face of your puppy-like charm."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Mingyu muttered, but he didn't bat Jeonghan's hands away, simply content with the fact the elder boy had smiled. He could tolerate the good-natured teasing, if it put Jeonghan in a happy mood. "That's me, a giant lumbering piece of fluff." He spoke sarcastically but was secretly pleased when Jeonghan laughed.

"That you are." Jeonghan finally withdrew his hands, settling down more comfortably in his seat. As he turned his gaze forward, he couldn't help but notice the subvert glances people were throwing his way, one girl craning her neck almost painfully to look behind her. It would have been comical, if he didn't know perfectly well the reason for their stares.

"The professor's running late, isn't he?" He spoke loudly, pointedly, and the other students quickly took the hint and switched their attention elsewhere. Jeonghan sighed, folding his arms over his chest, his expression closing off once more. He hated thinking everyone knew about him and Jisoo, he hated the speculation they would indulge in, as if they knew who they were, what they had meant to each other. People couldn't just mind their own damn business, could they?

If only Mingyu had retained his first impression of being intimidating, he would have glared menacingly at them all. He settled for mirroring Jeonghan's position, all crossed arms and languid posture, as if neither of them had a care in the world.

If only, Mingyu reflected quietly, it were true.

Jisoo was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn't hear them at first, to the point that even Seungkwan clearing his throat in an exaggerated manner didn't gain his attention.

They all exchanged glances, before unanimously coming to a decision. "Jisoo-hyung!" They hollered in chorus.

Jisoo let out a startled squeak, his eyes impossibly wide as he looked up at them in surprise.

"It took a while to get your attention, hyung." Seungkwan observed, feigning nonchalance, and beside him Hansol snorted at his dramatics. Minghao and Junhui on the other hand were simply bobbing their heads in agreement. "Quarter for your thoughts?" Seungkwan said the latter in English, stumbling over some syllables, but he looked quite proud of himself afterwards that Jisoo didn't have the heart to tell him the correct word was 'penny'.

"Sorry for ignoring you - my mind was just wandering a bit, that's all." Jisoo offered them a weak smile, waving his hand towards the empty chairs next to him. "Are you all done with classes?" Jisoo asked conversationally as they took their seats, Seungkwan and Hansol across from him and Minghao and Junhui on either side. "Anything interesting happen?" He couldn't help but pray silently that something did happen, just to distract the four of them from a certain line of conversation-

-but once Seungkwan latched on to something, he was without a doubt a force that couldn't be derailed.

"So hyung, what's got you so absentminded lately?" If anyone could fake a perfectly innocent tone, it would be Boo Seungkwan, though they all knew him too well at that point for it to work on them. "I can't imagine what, or who, could be running in your thoughts 24/7. Care to share with your beloved dongsaengs?" Seungkwan fluttered his lashes for effect, and they all in turn looked at Jisoo as if to say '~well?'

"Oh you know. School stuff." Jisoo said vaguely, studiously ignoring their looks of disbelief. "I have an exam later, so I've just been reviewing all this time-"

"Really, hyung - how can you be so dense? What I'm really asking is what is the deal between you and Jeo-" Hansol, thank the heavens for Hansol, slapped a hand over Seungkwan's mouth before he could finish his sentence. The other boy sputtered beneath his palm, but from the way he glared you could already predict the less-than-savory content of his words.

"If Joshua-hyung doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't have to." Hansol said loyally, falling into his habit of referring to Jisoo by his American name. Jisoo shot him a grateful look, about to say he had to leave soon if he didn't want to be late-

-when suddenly, in a burst of movement neither of them expected, Minghao stood up and shouted. "Jeonghan-hyung!" He waved his arm furiously in greeting.

Jisoo told himself he wouldn't look, that he'd keep his gaze locked on Hansol's, but it was like an incessant tug, an impulse - his head canted upwards and from all the students there his eyes met his first.

He wondered if his expression mirrored Jeonghan's, full of shock and uncertainty. Poor Mingyu, switching his gaze from Jeonghan to them to Jeonghan once more in rapid succession. Taking pity on the younger boy, Jisoo caught Jeonghan's eye and inclined his head towards their table. Sit down?

He saw the other boy's hesitation and he told himself it shouldn't have hurt, but in the end Jeonghan nodded quietly and tugged Mingyu in their direction.

"They're coming over here." Seungkwan reported, somewhat unnecessarily - they all had their eyes on them after all - but Jisoo supposed the younger's stage whisper was apropos for the situation. Some part of him still felt dazed when Jeonghan took a seat at the corner, not directly in front of him but within his line up of sight, Mingyu occupying the last empty seat on the other end.

"Well, isn't it nice that we can have Mingyu and Jeonghan-hyung joining us, Hansol?" Seungkwan spoke conversationally, and though he addressed Hansol his gaze remained on Jisoo, expectant. "It's always best when all of us are together, after all."

(yes, Boo Seungkwan wasn't subtle at all.)

"Yes, of course." Jisoo murmured, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Jeonghan's gaze snap to him before the blonde looked down once more.

"I'm glad you agree with my sentiments, Jisoo-hyung, though I would have preferred if you showed more excitement." Seungkwan's attention then landed on Mingyu, who met the younger boy's smile with a frozen look of his own. "So Mingyu, did you and Jeonghan-hyung just come from class?" 

It took a few heartbeats, but Mingyu eventually caught on and nodded emphatically. "Yes. We did. It was a good class. Quite...informative." He ended somewhat weakly.

"I see. How very interesting. Do you share the same opinion, Jeonghan-hyung?" At this point, Jisoo wanted to laugh hysterically, the tension only ratcheting up with each of Seungkwan's questions, yet the younger boy continued to feign obliviousness.

(still, Jisoo snuck a look at Jeonghan as he waited for the blonde's reply.)

"Yeah, I guess? I mean, I don't seem to love it like Mingyu does-" Jeonghan tried to inject some humor in his tone, to offset the strained atmosphere. "-he attends every single class without fail, yet still he ends up falling asleep by the half-hour mark-" 

"-you haven't been going to class?" The question burst out before Jisoo could stop it, and from the way Jeonghan's eyes narrowed, he didn't appreciate it. Not one bit.

"It's an easy course, Jisoo." They locked gazes over the table - Jisoo's fingers knotted together painfully and Jeonghan's were digging into the cloth of his jeans. "I don't skip all the time, just a lecture here and there. After all, we can't be all perfectly diligent students like you." He didn't know what was making him say those things, a flood of words he had no control over, and while his expression remained cool, Jeonghan's pulse was beating a staccato against his throat.

(he wondered if Jisoo knew his heartbeat sounded a lot like his name, at least to his ears. he wondered if Jisoo knew how crazy he was becoming, with him just sitting there a few meters away.)

"I didn't mean it that way Jeonghan." His voice became quiet, oh so quiet, and Jeonghan hated how calm and reasonable it made him seem, when he was just barely holding on to his wits. "I just..." Jisoo fell silent, as if he was trying to find the right thing to say, and in that moment his gaze roved generously over Jeonghan's face - the bridge of his nose, the clarity of his eyes, the seam of his lips-

"-I was just concerned, that's all."

Some part of Jeonghan's heart soared at hearing that. Of course he still cared. Of course he still loved him. In hindsight, he wondered if he'd said the right thing at that moment, not the next words that left his lips, stinging ones, hurtful ones - would everything have been fixed? Would they once again be together, perfectly in love?

Jeonghan's chuckle sounded bitter to his own ears. "Well, you gave up the right to be concerned over me, didn't you?"

He didn't hear Seungkwan in a breath, didn't see the other four boys watch the pair of them, completely shell-shocked. All he saw was Jisoo's flinch, the way his lips pressed together and his eyes glazed over-

"-I have to go."

Stop him, his mind yelled, but he body did nothing as Jisoo shot up from his seat, the scraping of the chair loud even in the din of the cafeteria.

"I'm sorry." Those were Jisoo's parting words, and the same ones Jeonghan whispered heartbeats later when his back disappeared from sight.