27/02

The third day's first three hours, I thought the guys had given up on me. But I was wrong. Problems were going to grow bigger and bigger.

"Selene, could you please read the first three lines of page 42?"

I thanked God for having let us have our old Latin teacher. I loved her way to teach: she's a person who makes you understand how much she loves her job, and love the subject she teaches as well. I adored her lessons, and I adored Latin because of her, so it was no bother for me reading those texts again.

"Quoniam ad hunc locum entum esse, non alienum esse videtur de Galliae Germaniaeque moribus et quo differant hae nationes inter sese proponere."

"Good. Can you tell me what is this?"

"Of course, teacher. It's Caesar, De Bello Gallico, chapter 11."

"Ok. And now, would you mind translating it?"

"But, teacher, I don't have my dictionary."

"Selene, repeat me the author's name."

"Caesar, teacher."

"And what's the Latin author to be easier to translate?"

"Caesar, teacher."

"So, would you mind?"

I sighed.

"Since we've come to this point, it doesn't seem off topic speaking about Gallia and Germany traditions and what these nations differ between them."

"I see you kept your abilities, Selene."

"Thank you, teacher. But it's not ability, we studied it four years ago... I just still remember..."

She laughed. I hate to be on the spotlight. Well, maybe it's true I can translate a bit, but I don't like to be the centre of attention... I prefer working without being noticed. I became that way because of my classmates... I wasn't that shy, originally, and when I started University I came back liking my work to be appreciated, but being again in that classroom... It blocked me. I heard them start to blabber even before I finished the translation.

"Ah, here she goes again... I hate her"

"She can only brag and pretend not to like compliments..."

"How hypocrit"

"Wow, she did it without dictionary... She's amazing..."

The last one wasn't what I expected. I turned to see who said it, and I saw a smiling Hongbin with his thumb up. I smiled back without noticing, and I soon made an angry face understanding my mistake. Tch. You're weak, Selene, keep your guard on.

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During break time, Hakyeon approached me. Here's the leader trying to protect his babies. How cute. But I'm sorry, no diferences for you.

"Hello Selene! Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Hello. I like being alone. Let me be."

"Hmpfh. No way. Do you see that tall and black haired guy? He was the same as you, a few years ago. He didn't even speak back then. I managed to make him open to the world, and so I will do with you."

Then he sat next to me. I know what you did, Hakyeon, and I will never be enough grateful, but you know, Taekwoon is one of your group's members, and he can trust you anyways... my situation is different. I peeked at Taekwoon while thinking that, and I saw the most beautiful thing a Starlight could even see: he was laughing, laughing with an arm around Jaehwan's shoulder. Really, Cha Hakyeon, thank you.

"You won't be able to. I'm not going to be social."

"I can be quite annoying, you know?"

"I already told Hongbin and Jaehwan I don't like you all."

"Give me a reason. I don't like the just becauses."

"No need to give you a reason. Now go."

"No."

He stood up, crossed his arms and stayed in front of me, looking into my eyes. After a few seconds I kept watching him with the most unpolite look I had, I looked down. I can't stand eye contact for too long.

"Aha, I got a point. You gave up and allowed me to understand you are really shy... Just like our Taekwoonie eheheheeee!"

"I'm not shy. I'm afraid of eye contact. And I hate being observed."

"That's called being shy."

I got angry. Not because he found one of my weaknesses, but because he kept on speaking. I hated the fact that he wanted to help me and I couldn't take his help. I really wanted to speak, but geez, it was pointless! They would be gone in a month!

"I. AM. NOT. SHY. I JUST WANT TO BE ALONE AND YOU AREN'T HELPING ME SO TAKE YOUR AWAY FROM HERE AND NEVER COME BACK!"

I lost control and shouted. After a few second of total silence during which the whole classroom stared at me in disbelief, I saw a blonde haired boy approaching us. Wonsik. He wasn't angry, though. He just looked worried.

"Hakyeon-ah, just stop for now. She doesn't want to be bothered."

"I know Wonsikie, but... Look at her, look at her reactions. She needs help!"

I death glared them both. But I also felt tears that needed to fall. Resist, Selene.

"Uh, maybe she needs. But today's not the day she will accept it. Come with me, you are wasting our precious break time."

"But I feel like I can do more..."

"You did enough for today, and I'm proud of you. Now let's go."

While saying that, he wrapped Hakyeon with his arm and kissed him. On the lips.

The tears I was going to shed disappeared. I felt like my whole world was crushing... And a new one was borning. Are you serious? Those two... are a real couple? Oh my... So cute! THEY ARE TOGETHER! Goddamn boys, why in front of me! You can't do this to a poor Starlight who has been shipping you since predebut... I can't react, I have to hide from you all, I don't want you to know that I know and LOVE your group... And you kiss right in front of me?

My fangirl side had exploded. But I couldn't let it come out in classroom... not after all that I had done to keep it secret. I put my sweater's hood on, covering my laughing face, and I ran towards the toilet. When I came out, I saw the couple hiding in a corner, and they weren't exactly chatting. Wonsik had his hands under Hakyeon's shirt, that was half on, so that his abs were clearly shown (whew, so he has abs too!) while Hakyeon kept his arms around his boyfriend's neck, hugging him tightly. They were kissing deeply, so they didn't notice me at first. They were really a cute couple to see, so I stayed there looking at them for a few seconds. But when I decided that it wasn't a good thing to do and to come back to the classroom, their faces separated. . Why do you two need to breath right now?

They looked at me, and obviously they caught my giggling face.

"Why are you giggling? Have you never had a boyfriend?"

"That's none of your business. And I was not giggling."

"So why were you looking at us? You know, it's a ert thing."

I felt like my mom was scolding me. Damn Cha Hakyeon.

"I... I'm sorry. It's just that... You are two boys. And you kiss freely, without caring about other people's opinion. I... I wish I could have your courage."

The tears that had stopped before found their way again. I started to run, not wanting anybody to see my weakness.