Jaebum never expected it to be Youngjae in the end.

Jaebum had always had a crush on Jinyoung. Jinyoung was his first kiss, his first date, his first boyfriend, his first time falling in love, his first everything. But when JJ Project ended, Jinyoung decided to end them, too. He figured it was best if they were just friends, since it would be harder to hide their relationship from everyone.

“We just shouldn’t be together. Hiding our relationship from five other guys, plus all the fans, won’t be easy.”

“Why do we have to hide it?”

But he knew why. In South Korea, being gay was typically not okay.

However, as time passed, Jaebum found himself getting over Jinyoung. The other guys were okay, too. They hadn’t gotten their last member yet, but they assumed he would nice. They hoped.

And he was. When Youngjae came, Jaebum didn’t mind the fact that he had to share a room and a bed with him. Youngjae was shy and quiet around the others, but around him he was comfortable. Jaebum liked that. He liked the fact that Youngjae thought he could be himself around him. It made him feel special. And it wasn’t just that, either. There was something about Youngjae that just reminded Jaebum of himself - or well, his past self. A certain innocence and a heavy passion for music. Because of that, Jaebum felt the need to protect him like a little brother.

Their relationship was special, different. Of course, Jaebum and Jinyoung were still the two inseparable best friends, but Youngjae had already held an important place in Jaebum’s heart, there was no denying that.

“It’s weird to have girls screaming over me,” Youngjae suddenly admitted to Jaebum in their room, breaking the silence the two of them had shared.

Jaebum nodded, chuckling softly. “Yeah, you never get used to it.”

“I’ve never even kissed someone before. Or even dated anyone. I'm a in every way.”

Jaebum pretended not to notice that Youngjae didn’t specify on the female gender, and instead said someone. Sitting cross legged across from Youngjae, he smirked.

“18 and never been kissed? That won’t do.”

Youngjae furrowed his brow, confused. What did that mean? As he sat there questioning, Jaebum closed his eyes and puckered his lips, startling him.

“You’re a guy,” Youngjae quickly said, caught off guard. “I’m not…” Before he could continue, Jaebum laughed.

“I’m joking around, relax,” Jaebum assured. He only saw Youngjae as a little brother, he didn’t want to kiss him. “I didn’t think you’d do it anyways,” Jaebum chuckled. “You’re too submissive. I don’t see you as the guy to make a move.”

But this bothered Youngjae more than it should. He didn’t want to be seen as weak or submissive. Especially not to Jaebum, who secretly, he was falling hard for. So that's why suddenly Youngjae’s lips were placed onto the elder. At first it was a little rough - but soon became soft and sweet. You could taste the inexperience on his lips, but the feeling was so lovable. Although Jaebum didn’t move his lips against Youngjae’s because of the suddenness, it didn’t mean he didn’t crave for more once Youngjae pulled away.

He had never thought of Youngjae like that before. He’d only saw him as a younger brother. But now that he’d tasted the sweet innocence, he wasn't so sure.

“Um…” Youngjae looked away, his entire face red. “I wanted to prove you wrong. I’m not submissive.” His voice was quiet, shaky, he was obviously thrown off by his own actions as well.

Jaebum didn’t know what to say. Was Youngjae just trying to prove him wrong, or did he really want to kiss him? Was Youngjae interested in guys? Was he interested in him?

    “Okay,” Was all Jaebum could manage. “Whatever. Just uh, goodnight.”

Jaebum slept with his back facing Youngjae’s, trying to figure out what he was feeling inside of him. Suddenly, he couldn’t stop thinking about Youngjae’s lips. About his smile. About his laugh. About his eyes, and his eyelashes. About his moles, and his pale skin. Suddenly, he was seeing Youngjae in a whole different way. And once he didn’t feel eyes staring him down from behind, he turned around to face Youngjae, seeing that the boy had fallen asleep.

He looked peaceful, despite the fact he was probably extremely embarrassed. Looking at the boy, Jaebum reached out and caressed his cheek, looking at him in a whole new way. And although part of him wanted to turn around, Jaebum couldn’t help it at this point. He put his face closer to the younger boy’s and placed his lips onto his, needing to experience it again. Youngjae, practically being dead in his sleep, didn’t wake.

Jinyoung’s kisses were salty and bitter and tasted of heartbreak, always leaving with an addicting aftertaste like a drug - despite they made you feel sad, it was a good sad. An addicting sad. Youngjae’s kisses were warm and welcoming, filled with innocence and love - a taste Jaebum had never had before.

One he had always wanted with Jinyoung, but never got.

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This is short and unedited, but I hope you like it! It's just chapter one, but I plan on trying to update often. Expect another chapter tomorrow! - JJ