“Thanks, mom, but no I don’t need your help anymore,” the boy exclaimed in an outraged tone as he stormed through the kitchen, dropping his school bag the first chance he saw. Pulling the refrigerator door open hard enough to shake its structure, he grabbed a soda can and slammed it shut.

SunHee could hear the contents shaking inside, silently hoping that nothing fell out of its place or else she’d have to spend all afternoon cleaning up behind her son again.

“I’m sorry, okay? She seemed like a nice girl...and I grew a bit curious,” she confessed with an annoyed tone to her voice.

Myung stood to his feet. He slammed the can down onto the table and turned to his mother.

“Look, mom, just because I’m talking to a girl doesn’t mean you have to know her. Stop being nosey and stay out of my life would you?! I’m old enough to take care of myself! To have my own life! To live it the way I want to without you having to know every tiny detail about it!” he yelled at his mother, his eyes filled with rage as he stared right into hers. Sighing heavily, he snatched his bag up from where he had thrown it and headed towards his room.

“Just leave me alone okay?” Myung mumbled under his breath. SunHee watched until he was out of sight.

“Who do you think you are? You have no right to yell at your mother like that! I brought you into this world and have done nothing but loved and supported you for the past sixteen years of your life! I don’t deserve to be yelled at like this! If you think you can take care of yourself, do so then! You can fix your own dinner tonight!” she yelled at the top of her lungs, her voice hopefully still able to reach him. She sighed and shook her head as she ran her hand along the ceramic counter top. Making her way to her room, she smiled sadly at the bedroom door that stood at the end of the hall. His words rang through her mind over and over again.

‘I don’t need your help anymore. Leave me alone.’

Turning her gaze toward her own bedroom door, she twisted the knob and opened it slowly. “Where did I go wrong with you…”

SunHee could hear the rain starting, slowly hitting her window and she watched for a moment as the raindrops slid down the cool glass. Today was one of those days where the weather perfectly described how she felt. Turning her gaze from the window to the bed she looked at the teddy bear resting against one of the pillows. It looked peaceful and happy with its stitched on smile and her mind immediately fell upon Kyung once more.

“Did you leave me a note for something like this, too? Because right now I feel horrible.” Her last words shook as they left her lips. Her voice trembled as tears rolled down her cheek.  “I don’t know what to do right now. Some help would be nice, you know.”

SunHee smiled sadly as she walked to her bed. Crouching down in front of it. she pulled out a box. It was a box she had been protecting with her life because inside was nothing other than the other half of her heart. Setting it on the bed, she stared at the letters neatly organized and still in their rightful envelopes. All but one were still closed. She took a moment to look back on the opened one and smiled, wiping the tears from her cheeks. The paper was now crinkled in a few spots from having so many tears dropped on it, drying itself over and over again.

“I’m sorry...I’m starting to ruin your letter Kyung...Hopefully I’ll still be able to read your writing in a few years…” she mumbled as she carefully folded the letter and placed it back into its envelope. Looking through the rest of the letters she found one in particular that made her smile.

‘For when you have a fight with our son’

She smiled as she ran her hand over the handwriting on the front of the envelope. How she missed even that.

“You really prepared for everything, didn’t you?” her voice started to shake all over again as she slowly opened the letter, making sure not to tear the envelope in the process.

Tears started to flow down her cheeks as she read through the letter her husband once wrote to her as he laid in a hospital bed. He knew. He knew all of this would happen and he knew that she would need him. She watched as her tears fell down onto the paper and even though she tried her hardest not to ruin it, she couldn’t help herself. She could see him smiling as he wrote this, worried about his little family. What would happen to them once he left. Regretful that he never got to hold his son in his arms. Happy that he could at least leave a few helpful notes for his loving wife. Crying because even though he knew he’d never be able to see his son, Kyung would soon say his goodbyes to the world and life he knew, he wasn’t ready.

Looking at the letter she began to read.

Annyeong, sweetie,

Since you’ve opened this one, it seems like you’ve had your first fight with our son. How old is he now? 12? 13? Older? Either way, I’m sure you’ve done a good job in raising him. Does he look like me yet? Your first fight with him will most likely be the hardest. All he needs is a little space. I wonder what it was about. Did he do something horrible? Has he told you what’s bothering him? Probably not….Or is it about a girl? Either way you should let him calm down for a few minutes and try talking to him again. Calm yourself first, though. I know how angry you can get when something doesn’t go your way.

I always found that side of you quite adorable, to be honest. It saddens me that I can’t be there for this, myself. I’d love to give it a try….the whole being a father thing, that is. Maybe I just wasn’t meant for it? Anyway, keep your cool with him and make sure that you let him know how much you love him. Show him that you’ll always be there for him no matter what. He must be quite hard headed, huh? He got that bit from both of us….I love you both so much. Take it easy with him and I’m sure he’ll come around. I’m sorry, I tried my best to write something for this that might help you, but I’m not quite sure how to take care of children….I’ll never get to figure it out, either. Maybe one day you can tell me all about it? I would love to hear it all!

                            Still love you always, your Kyungie

SunHee smiled sadly down at it, her hands shaking and tears falling as she started to sob, “I’m sure you would have been an amazing father, Kyung.”

She placed the letter on the bed beside her and grabbed the teddy bear. When she held it close to her chest, a soft knock on the door silenced her sobs only long enough for her to mumble a quick ‘Come in’.

Myung stood at the entrance of his mother’s room, holding the matching teddy bear in his arms and staring at his mother, sadness replacing the once furious gaze he had held. Looking around the room, he could see her clinging to the bear as if her life depended on it. A box that he had never seen before sitting in front of his mother. Tears were falling from her eyes like an eternal waterfall. He hated seeing his mother cry and guilt suddenly overcame him. Did he make his her cry? Was this all his fault?

Sighing as deeply as he did earlier, Myung could feel his own cheeks becoming wet as he approached his mother without a word, wrapping his arms around her tightly and crying into her. “I’m so sorry, mom. I didn't mean it, I swear. Please don’t cry! I’ll never say something that stupid again, I promise! I’ll tell you about everything and anything you want to know just...please stop crying, mom. I love you!”

SunHee smiled through her tears, hugging him tightly before pulling away only to look at him. “You are so much like him, do you know that?”

Myung looked at his mother’s bloodshot eyes and sniffed. “Like...who?” he asked in a low tone.

SunHee smiled and patted the empty space beside her for him to sit, “Your father. He loved you so very much, and...he never even knew you.” Grabbing the two opened letters she stared at them for a moment before handing them over to Myung to read. “That bear that you love so much was was once your father’s. You found it in the attic once and somehow knew because the first thing you said was ‘Daddy’.”

Myung looked from his mother to the bear resting in his arms.

“I’m sure he’d be happy to know that you have it now.”

Staring at the bear he smiled a little before turning his attention to the letters and opening the first one.

“Dad must have really loved you,” he mumbled causing SunHee to shake her head with a smile.

“He loved both of us very very much. Always and forever….until the last breath that he took….He did nothing but love us with all of his heart...Kyungie.”

‘Say, SunHee, if you could choose….what would you want?’ Kyung questioned with a smile on his face as he placed his hand on her stomach.

She grinned at him and shrugged. ‘Honestly, I wouldn’t mind either. What about you?’ She watched as he smiled even brighter and looked up at her.

‘I’d love a little boy. I wouldn’t mind a little girl, but...a little boy, a son, would be nice.’ Kyung sat down on the couch beside SunHee and looked into her eyes, his smile never fading. ‘I think if we had a girl we’d have too much trouble keeping the boys away from her because she’d be just as beautiful as her mother. I don’t know if I can take so many boys drooling over my little girl!’

Sunhee laughed and hit his arm playfully, ‘What, you mean the same way you used to drool over me?’

‘Yah! I never….’ Kyung stopped mid sentence and started laughing. ‘Okay, you got me. You were the same with me! Don’t think I never noticed the way you stared at me, and then looked away when I saw you!’

SunHee blushed and looked away, hiding her grinning face from him.

‘I -I never drooled over you….’

Kyung burst out laughing and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his lap making SunHee smile up at him.

‘I admitted it, so why can’t you?’

SunHee laughed and shook her head at him. ‘Because it’s not true, I never actually -’

Her sentence was cut short and her eyes widened as Kyung placed his lips onto hers, pulling her into a sweet kiss. Giving into him she closed her eyes and kissed him back, still being able to taste the sweet strawberries from earlier.

‘Why can’t you just admit that you love me?’ Kyung questioned as he pulled away, smiling down at her red face.

‘I love you, Kyungie….more than anything in this world. For now at least,’ she giggled over the last part taking his hand and placing them both, hers and his, over her stomach and leaning back into his chest.

“If it’s a boy, you’ll have your hands full, though, Kyung. I’m sure he’ll be just like you when he grows up. The smile, the greasy pick up lines, the attitude when he get’s mad….’

Kyung wrapped his free arm around her a bit tighter and nodded. ‘Yeah, I know. Don’t worry. I’ll take of him. I’ll take care of you. Both of you...and if he ever gets out of line, I’ll fix it. That’s what I’m here for, am I not? To love and take care of my little family.’ He grinned brightly as SunHee nodded.

‘What would I ever do without you?’ she questioned in a low tone, closing her eyes and falling asleep in his arms.