So, where should I start? haha :) hmm... 

uhmmm, I guess I'll start with my friendship issues. lol hmmm..

So, my former bestest guy friend chatted me last night but I was able to view it just this morning. haha I actually didn't notice it last night. Anyways, he asked me regarding my girl best friend's problem and well yeah just that. Then, I asked him how is he doing. Since, our best friend friendship is over we don't talk like we usually did. Let's just say he fell for me but I don't feel the same way, and yeah things got complicated. He would just talk to me whenever he wanted to. After all that had happened, I don't talk to him anymore. It's just too awkward for me to initiate to talk to him these days. Unless he's the first to talk to me. Maybe because things are just not it usually is. Something has changed and the fact that we're no longer bestest friends. yeah~ However, if he talks to me, I see to it that I would talk to him normally but its just that he would usually say things that will make things hard for me to say something about it. Just like what he answered to me earlier when I asked him how is he doing. He replied, "I am not okay. I was never okay :)" Actually, I did not respond to that. THE HECK! I just don't know how and what will I respond to that. What does he expect me to respond to that answer of his!? And, it's like he's really blaming me and that he's rubbing it on my face that I was the reason why he is not okay, that he was never okay! IDK! Yes, he's being honest of what he feels but, ARGH! I just don't know. For me, it's like its so immature of him to do that IF he really inteded to tell me that it is my entire fault why he is like that! Well, I couldn't blame him for falling for me but, he couldn't also blame me for not feeling the same way. Even I have someone who doesn't feel the same way as I do! And I still do, until now. After  nearly 6 years, I think. haha yeah! that long. haha Anyways, I'll talk about that later. haha So back to my friendship issue. haha ok, I just don't know what to do. Its like his life was ruined after I rejected him. Well not totally ruined. haha Yes, it is very painful to be rejected but I don't think it is reasonable to act like your life is ruined and that it is hopeless. It was never wrong to love someone truly but we should also know how to love ourselves truly. I don't want him to ruin his life just because of that! :( He should move forward and not to be stuck in the past, in the things that he knows he couldn't change. He should learn how to accept things for him to move forward. I know, moving on is something that is easily said than done and I know it takes time. Even I can't totally move on from my long time crush. haha But I don't think it is right to act that way. sighs! I just don't know what to say anymore! aigooo!! 

Then this afternoon, we had another best friend bonding. (me, chijue and bishy) Well, one of them is having a big problem :( (i won't mention who and I won't really explain here what's her problem) Let's just say, she's having a problem with her family, college friends and other people who are judgemental! >:( sighs! She was crying and telling us everything what's on her mind and its so freaking frustrating that we didn't know what to do earlier!! :(( It really hurts to see her in pain and in so much doubt about herself! :( Some people criticize her of her appearance and because of that she's loosing the confidence she has in herself!! :(( I just really hate those kind of people who can't see the inner beauty of a person!! And those people who insult other people! ARGH!! I JUST! GAAAAH!! sighs! I really don't know what to do to help her. :( I can't really advice something to her cause I think I don't know well enough about her family and all TT__TT  The only thing I can do for her is to be the best friend she needed who can listen to whatever she will say. To be the person who she can vent out all her frustrations and all! sighs! I'm sorry if I can't really do anything to help :(

And then also this afternoon, after she had let out all her thoughts and frustration to her problems we decided to just eat. Comfort food, something like that. haha But before buying our foods, we searched first for some computer shop who prints at least 1 or 2 pesos per page to print the lessons my other best friend needed to study for. On our cheap printing computer shop hunting (lol) haha we came across with my long time crush. haha Mr. Blue! HAHAHA so yeah~ After how many months, we met again! HAHA He helped us to go to other computer shops around. haha I was really happy, to be honest! ahihihi shaaaaks! hahaha my best friend even says "10 or 15 or 20 minutes of happiness in one day" HAHA gosh! Did I say I was really happy!? HAHAHA ^_^ kyaaaa! hihi okay. HAHA I know that he doesn't feel the same way but I can't do anything about that! haha I still like him. I really can't say if I love him. Idk :( haha can you tell me if its love or not? hahah sighs. Somehow, I hope that someday he will also feel the same way :( haha oh well, I'm not sulking about it and I'm still moving forward with my life. haha Though he can't respond to my feelings, I at least would like to have a close friendship with him. haha Anyways, I'm really really happy to finally see him again. haha ^_^ I wonder how it feels like to be like/love by someone like you do. aigooo! haha 

So yeah~ hahaha mixed emotions just for one day! haha anyways, moving forward~ HAHA ;)