Up until this very moment I'm still very much in-denial about everything that's happening in the exo fandom (my fandom), everything is in total chaos and there's a whole ton of hating, speculations, and hysterics, but deep inside me there is still this part that's hoping this was simply blown out of proportion by the media and just a mere misunderstanding between Kris and SM and that everything will eventually settle down. (Wishful thinking.) ! It's sooo hard for me to write this thing up but I felt the need to otherwise I'll combust. I am literally tearing up.
I know EXO will eventually disband (maybe after 10 years?) but not now, and definitely not like this. This is all too soon, too sudden, and too unexpected. Too painful. By now SM should have at least learned something from the splitting of DB5K and Hangeng leaving SJ, but I guess not. With SM artists constantly seeking a way out if the soul- enterprise, I think it is safe to say there is seriously something wrong with the SM's way of handling their talents. Screw you SM! Stop overworking your artists, learn something!!!!
So this is how it feels like to have your fandom spiral down the drain. Its like my heart is literally being ripped apart. I never thought i would go through a roller-coaster ride of emotions because of a boyband but nope, my pain is legit!
I hate that SM is trying their best to ruin Kris to the public, putting all the blame on him over all this fiasco! Ugh. Please.
I am also saddened about the passive aggressive posts of some members on ig after one by one each of them unfollowed kris. (Except baekhyun) Though speculations roamed around that it must be SM mandating them to do that and all but I was skeptic as it sounds a little ridiculous to me. But in Suho's interview stating, "I wish Kris would withdraw the lawsuit and apologize to the members and the company. There is nothing wrong with the members or the company." Sounded sooo shady, totally one sided and favoring SM!! Fans claimed it sounded really similar to the statement Yunho said back when DB5K was the one under this ordeal. Wow, SM, real mature to drag the rest of the members into it just so you can throw Kris under the bus!! I believe Suho would never say those very words on his own. I know the members are upset, sad, hurt, shocked like the rest of us but their pain is probably 100 x more potent. (Especially, china-line plus yeol as they are the closests to kris) But they would never purposely say hurtful rude words to each other.
Also eventho it seems like Kris did keep the members in the dark about filing this lawsuit, I don't think they were completely clueless about it. They must have seen some changes in Kris months prior or something. (Maybe those times Kris was MIA, he was already trying to leave exo but was somehow convinced to stay.) But yeah, I think the members were shocked as hell when Kris actually filed for a lawsuit. Cant imagine the emotions they went thru, but I think they should stay away from social media and refrain from posting things. Also if SM is fueling them to do so or is the one actually doing the updates, as fans claims, that is sooo not cool, SM so not cool! Exo manager using the word "betrayal" and tao's supposed update in weibo slanderously calling kris a traitor. If tao really posted this, shouldn't sm try to make him not do it, like maybe delete the post, because the case is on going and such does not help. I hate SM, gonna direct all my hate to them! Im not gonna believe anything from member's social media for now.
People are actually hating on kris pulling this kind of in the beginning of promotion, jeopardizing the career of exo. (I think their first solo concert might be postponed.) Though it appears like its a very ty move, i think he timed it to make an impact. Its now or never, why prolong the agony. Also there was a rumor that he was only seeking renegotiations of his contract and not nullifying it completely but the chinese media immediately released an article saying he wants termination. So if that was the case, it was soo unfortunate.
I dont think im ready to see them just ot11. How will they carry out their concept of parallelism of it MOT5 while its KOT6. Im intrigued if they put a new member or carry on with ot11 and forget the sub-units. I know eventually things will settle down, time will heal wounds, everyone will move on. Yes, this year will be hard and also next year, transition will take time but exo ot11 will pull thru, like with sj, homin and 2pm.
But............It would be soooo weird exo without kris. I kennot. He was the reason why i am into exo. True that i began stanning other members but he would always be the one whom i'd search first in a ot12 pic, i'd feel bad if he doesn't get enough lines in a song, doesnt get enough exposure in an interview, doesnt get enough recognition. I only do and feel that towards him. So bottom line, i will be a little biased towards kris. Ugh.

I will support Wu Yifan, in whatever endeavors he plan to have in the future. I know that this must be harder for him more than anyone else. Goodness, he was (one of) the leader, his care towards s' feelings should be stronger than the others. Must be tough for him to leave his exo bros but something must have drove him to the edge to resort to a lawsuit. That after putting into consideration everything that's happening, perhaps, enough is enough and an action has to be made. Yes, it was like backstabbing sm as their agency prompt exo's popularity but i think they already paid their dues fulfilling all their schedules while projecting a lovely image in front of the camera. I dont think they owe sm that much. They worked their asses, even if they were sick or injured. And knetizens are seriously smiting the remaining china-line. Can they not! Dbsk were all koreans yet they still filed a lawsuit against sm!
Ugh!
Im gonna cry again.
I never got to see ot12 in person, now, i never will.
I really need a hug. I have no kpop friends irl and im such a mess right now. Help!