i thought long n hard before posting this up even though i wrote it in a whim because you know...i'm always babbling whatever n everything...n not revealing anything n being mysterious is what matured people do, lolz...n posting all my random thoughts make me feel like a whiny immatured kid...(yes, being judged in silence frightens me, which is probably the reason it's better not to let people know you/your thoughts)....but then again... i've always been open on the net n this whole self-control to appear the matured person i'm not just kind of...isn't who i am...at least not in online world...so...just bear with me...besides, the point of this post is mainly to just share song...it's just that...ranting along comes naturally for me...lol. i'm still trying to scrape off this bad habit though...since it feels like i'm stripping bare all my thoughts n feelings when nobody else(at least not in my circle) shared anything abt them. as a result, i feel stupid(but still doing this lol)...oh well....while we wait for me to get matured n sharing less... let's get it on then~ haha...

So... i just want to share this aweeesome song that gave me sooo much feels n even inspired me to initiate this stupid ambition....which....thankfully...didn't get any encouragement/support... because how could i not realize it still n be so stupid to think it could work? the neglected ones, the unpopular ones, are meant to be what they are. if they have the spirit to at least try make a change or fight against the tide instead of surrendering...they probably wouldn't even be that unpopular/neglected/unappreciated/etc,etc/ if there's something i keep learning from people n society... life is not movies. underdogs are meant to be underdogs. trying to bring change only makes you the stupid one. which is what i kept being made to realize over n again all my life(n yet still not taking the lesson). being stupid. sometimes it worked...when it's an individual thing that only affects myself whether for the better or worse...but whenever it becomes a project involving people...society/community...it always ended up failing horribly or shortlived... which i can understand, being different more often only makes you the outcast...not something anyone would like to withstand most probably. so...this is what it all boils down to. the society may complain in words about how unfair things are n blabla...but by action...i guess, we're all already comfortable in our places. so...i'm just stupid for always being too influenced by movies where underdogs can actually become something. that just a little tiny tweak from the monochromatic, monotonous generic pattern of life everyone just goes along to, can lead to a great change that might surprise people in a pleasantly unexpected way and just make the world a little better place.(i'm not even specifying on fanfics mind you, but in everything)///but apparently...some people never learn that they shouldn't mess up with unwritten rules that have been accepted n never invite/welcome for a change. unfortunately i had to be in that stubborn stupid bunch.

anyway...speaking of that...it scares me that in the real world...it's becoming even more impossible to change anything...it's either you succumb to the bastardness, or you get trampled on...it's scary. maybe that's why i keep messing up. (or maybe that's just excuse) i still hold onto my ideals, another stupidity. things weren't this fugly when i was growing up. why did the rotten changes in society happens faster n faster with time and changes for the better never happen in the slightest way no matter how many would voice for that it? is it because people only dared to voice for it(in internet moreso lol) but not fight for it? sometimes i feel i'm stuck in the wrong time and place in this world. (well, that's not original...my sis always says the same thing since she hates how technology has taken over the world...she wants to be at the time there's no internet/computer/cellphone/tv/ at the time it'd already be dark outside by 8pm n there's nothing such as nightlife...yknow...when life was so much simpler n basic)

i'm scared of the world. it doesn't even feel like the same world i was in like a decade ago where the air was so hopeful, and anything is possible as long as you give it a try. or maybe growing up just open your eyes to the real fugliness you never would be able to see when you're young n thus turns you to becoming a coward? idk...

wow...why am i even spewing out all these stuffs in a fanfic site? lol...this is hard...i want to be cool(or is it...cold? lol) like my aff friends but at the same time...my noisiness just can't be contained. i always knew how uncool i am...T^T...oh well...xD.....i was just going to share this inspiring song...(albeit a lil too late since it was released in early 2011...whatever, awesomeness doesn't get stale with time)

Why? why is this made of completely awesomeness? wae? i can't understand...(dramatic much, lol)...this song is so full of awesomeness it can move me to tears n inspire me for a thousand things probly. even if the meaning of the lyrics(as in literal meaning lol) is a little hard to reach but at least it's meaningful n hopeful...the thing i've been losing...n usually...i always rant about people judging song based on music videos...i find it really shallow...but now...for this song...n this mv....because the mv is so awesome n fits so much with the awesome song (the scenes of the people who were 'alone' n gained hope/support btw, not the 'y charisma' that is Park Jungmin acting cool as he already is, pft, lol)...n so much feels evoked from both the song n mv...i'm actually taking the mv into my judgment of the song ...yeah...boo me. but Jungmin-ah!!! why u so awesome? (he wrote the lyrics btw, probly with some assistance from the composer, in fact he wrote lyrics for all songs in his debut single) n this type of deep meaningful thing just suits him anyway. prefer this than his later releases in Korea(his Japanese releases are a whole diff thing since he even had a different persona for it,seriously...split personality ftw...how fking cool more can u get jungminnnieee....*excusethefangirlingplsthankslol*)...but they're still unique even if lacking depth that this one has. i remember when this song came out(this was his solo debut song btw n if not mistaken, he's the first to go solo? correct me if i'm wrong)...i decided he's the best out of all SS501 members solo even without trying the others...n even if i looooveeee Hyungjun's vocals... (yes, i mean Hyungjun, NOT hyunjoong...i'm particular with the names spelling, people...lol...especially for SS501 where spelling is crucial or you'll mix up...n the ignorance of it forever annoys) anyway, while looking for the lyrics translations in blogposts...i got myself tangled up in MinJun feels again!!! how could they even think of pairing these two with different member? minjun is freaking meant for each other. n they're just inseparable...xD i just...feels!!! *oopsieexcusethecringeworthyotpfangirlingagain*

Afterall, Jungmin has always been the unexpected one...when they each had solo song during SS501 active time...i never expect Jungmin of all people to come out with a tearjerker/heartwrenching ballad (duet with Loveholic's Jisun...like freaking Loveholic?!!!)...people would expect that kinda ballad thing from youngsaeng probly...i mean...at least for people who are not SS501 all-knower-stans....

and besides Not Alone....Jungmin also has a couple more song with very beautiful lyrics from his few solo releases(kpop n jpop i guess)... it's not easy for me to find something to praise in kpop songs lyrics...so...i'm very happy that Jungmin made me so proud. (yes, i think he earned the credits since he wrote quite a few of his own songs lyrics n he does seem to know his own music direction) though Jungmin's most well known lyrics-written was probly the one he wrote (with Spica's Boa) for a track in Rainbow's debut mini album/single - Kiss(which was also the first lyrics he wrote that was produced besides the one cowritten with ss501) and i'm just reading his wikipedia...this guy...is really...something. i think the more you read about him the more you'll find his awesomeness: 1,  i know he's had his share of rumours/scandals whether it's true or not...but really...it's just...interesting learning about him...n all in all he's just an admirable person...i'm glad he chose dsp....what would happen to the glory of minjun if he had been in smT^T?...i've watched a little of his acting...n i really wished there'd be more...that show was funny in a weird creepy-ish way but his acting was natural...xD...n random but he was in musical Grease n won new actor award for it, n Rainbow's SeungA was also recently in that same musical....coincidence...xD....well, just throwing it out there n maybe hint for those reading my rainbow fic...xD... n another random thing...recently, he's in same musical with ZE:A's Minwoo...ok...that's random but i just like linking people i like...haha.

wait a sec...when did this turn into park jungmin fangirling post? ajkdbnsajkfbnfk...ok...I just thought it'd be cool to use the spirit of this song to encourage writers who write of unpopular groups n didn't get support to continue 
but since that idea doesn't seem like it'd work out here in aff...i don't think i'd want to start a community that only has me myself n i featuring a bunch of stalkers...lmao. go stalk celebs(oppars n unnirs remember?) you kiddos. or...anyone popular...not an insignificant thing like me....huh...seriously.

but...

i hope that this song will at least be an encouragement n support to you peeps. 
in a world where we crave for victories, recognition, support, praises, benefits, being on top of the social ladder, etc.etc. and there are those who are willing to give up who n what they really are...(i'm not saying all...i know many people love popular stuffs anyway...but i've encountered writers who admitted they write popular groups instead of groups they love simply to get support for their fics)
if you're still doing your own thing...not succumbing, but fighting...struggling...
stand tall and be proud. you're awesome n not alone. (here comes the cheese rite? lmao...i told you, i get caught in the feels of songs i love too easily...><)
If ever you feel you/your fics have no support, well, feel free to pm me if you want review/or even just a comment(i can't guarantee i'll be a follower of your fic[i'm picky] but i can give it a try n share some worthless advice/encouragement if you want/need any...but only if it's not popular group/fic)

to end this awesome almost-pointless blogpost...lemme share some other beautiful songs from Park Jungmin^^.

^ he wrote the lyrics

^ he wrote the lyrics n the song composed by Loveholic member omg...><...

^ Jungmin's ballad during SS501 active time...

i never really thought i'd like a group as popular as ss501(they were dbsk traditional rival like hot n sechskies back in the day...n big names n their fandom wars never fail to annoy me) but if you know bout SS501...i guess you'd know why they're one of my most respected kpop group, probly next to Shinhwa or maybe even more. they've done some awesome admirable stuff that i hadn't encounter from other groups. just have that certain qualities that earned my respect. i can't believe i hesitated whether to go to his fanmeeting that was announced to take place here last year...but it was cancelled anyway probly for different reason than ZE:A's cancellation...but still...yeayeah...my fav people all cancelled...n only the ones i don't really like will probly come...T^T....

anyway let me really end this with a really beautiful song...(though he doesn't wrote this one...xD)

ok fine i lied. thought you'd be more interested in something more upbeat?

honestly, this is more like what i would imagine him would do...hahah...xD (n he wrote this one too)

maybe i'll share his Japanese stuffs another day...

 

 

uh'oh...what hav i gotten myself into? i've gotten myself jungmin feels all over again...i guess now i can finally choose a fav member in ss501? unless i go watch hyungjun n get confused again...lol.

-edit-

ok fine...it hasn't end ...here some idiots to end this, most adorkable love/hate abusive tom n jerry otp: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJNQwtBslMc

n...i'm back to being confused...why u torturing me, minjun??? ><...lol.