Lately, I’ve been having the oddest, most baffling food cravings. I’ll just be minding my own business, catching up on news about Kpop or, you know, working (though I admit, I devote less time to that latter activity than I should), when I’ll be seized with strange, intense longings for the most random foods. I just have no idea why!

The weather in Bangkok has been nippy the last few weeks or so, and yet, I’ve wanted cookies and cream ice cream so badly. I like it, don’t get me wrong (not as much as plain vanilla; I’m a huge dork that way), it’s just I’d rather enjoy it when I don’t need to throw a light sweater on. Wonder why I’ve been wanting the stuff?

Here’s another puzzling craving: blueberry swirl cheesecake. Can’t even imagine eating any other sort of berry swirl. It’s got to be blueberry. How strangely specific is that?!?

I want rainbow candies. I know that’s not what they’re really called (or maybe that is what they’re called? I have no idea), but yeah, I want sugar that’s been hit with an array of food coloring. NOW!

Raspberry truffles sound yum just about now…but for what reason?

Gosh, I want chocolate. Dark chocolate, milk chocolate…yummy. (Still with the chocolate, though I have no idea why…)

It’s not just Western desserts I’ve been craving. I’ve also been wanting to sink my teeth into traditional Thai sweetmeats, too.

And you know what’s even worse than having inexplicable cravings? Having inexplicable cravings you can’t even attach to any one food! I just feel like nibbling on something white; just anything white will do! Does that make any sense?!?

Ack, thinking about all these foods has made me thirsty. Yet, why do I want a café latte? I DON’T EVEN DRINK COFFEE.

Oh no, now I want a Shamrock Shake. THEY DON’T EVEN SELL THOSE IN THIS COUNTRY! I WILL NEVER SATISFY THIS CRAVING THAT LEGITIMATELY CAME OUT NOWHERE.

Ugh. What to do?!? Where are these weird cravings originating from? I feel like there’s something beyond peculiar going on. It’s kind of freaking me out! I mean, it could be a parasite! It could be some kind of exotic fever that is killing off all my brain cells and is doing so by hitting me with these totally random, utterly unfathomable cravings! THIS COULD BE A SIGN OF MY IMPENDING BRAIN DEATH. (And I have such a little brain to start with!)

Okay, okay, I’ve got to calm down. I…I feel like I want to have a Pepsi. Yeah, that’s right. I honestly don’t know why, but I think having one will calm me somewhat…so strange, the craving came out of thin air...

Oh.

This post approved by Kim “I love strawberries, now so do you, because I totally went Inception on you” Sunggyu.

*Picture credits to their owners