Okay so I decided to write this for no reason really. Probably just to let you know some things about me. So yeah here I go.

Okay so I was born on 9th April 1999 (But I use the Korean AGE Because I like to be older for some reason so whatever xD). I was supposed to be born on the 11th April, but I wasn't because my parents didn't want to (I'll tell you why in a moment). For some reason my parents gave me the name Sara. My mom's name is Suzana and my dad's name is Safet (ALL S I KNOW RIGHT? XD). Ever since I was born I had a dog named Brina. She was my dad's helper aka. Guide. Why? Well because on 11th april 1997 my dad had an accident where he lost his eyesight. He was working in the military here and on that day they had practice and something wasn't working right and the thing exploded and set my father on fire. He was lucky to survive while his co-worker didn't. My dad went to various hospitals, but in the end he couldn't see. I remember when I was little I'd tell my dad that I would buy him new eyes on his birthday ( But I soon realize that I couldn't.). That's why I wasn't born on 11th april, because my dad and my mom didn't want that. 

So I was born in a family witha  dog, a blind dad and an annoying mom who worried to much about anything. I understand why she worries so much about me, but I'll tell you about that a bit later. So My first 8 years of life were fairy good thanks to Brina. I was bullied since 1st grade, my classmates would laugh at me and I was a crybaby and they called me that too, But I didn't worry about that at the time. So In 3rd grade when I was 8-9 Brina passed away. I blamed and I still do blame myself for her death for some reason. I loved that dog so much. Whenever I would come home she'd be there at the front door waiting for me, but then after she died I had nobody and everything changed for the worst. Then a year later by 96 year old grand grandmna died and It didn't hurt as much, but I started to feel the pain later on and I regret the way I treated her. I wish I wouldn't. 

So Then in 5th grade, I survived that grade but the affects of bullying started to show. I had to change schools and in 6th grade I was in a new school. I knew some of my new classmates and it gave me some kind of comfort I guess, but after 5 days of school... the bullying started to begin, it was much worse than anything I ever experienced. Oh yeah I started to gain weight after Brina died so by 6th grade I was a fatty. Okay so the bullying, they'd laugh at me, tease me, tell me I'm ugly and fat and when I would walk down the halls guys would make puking sounds. As if they were vomiting. I tried to ignore it, but I couldn't. That bullying went on for 2 years until now. And in these 2 years I realized that I was always hated by people, nobody liked me ever. And from 5th grade on I didn't trust anyone, even my parents and me and my family became apart and we didn't even communicate, but now It's gotten better so It's all good (YAY for the good outcome) .Also in 6th grade I started to have suicidal thoughts and I became depressed and then in summer 2012 I met a guy from denmark over my so called best friend from belgium. I kind of fell in love with him and he was 18 and all. Then all the bullying from the past hit me like a train and he made my life worse. I loved him so much it was pathetic. So then in 8th grade my grades started to fall and I begun cutting and thinking about dying was a daily routine. I was in the life of depression for most of my life, but the worst depression hit me last year and I just healed myself a few months ago from both cutting, suicidal thoughts, anorexic thoughts and depression, but the bullying stays in my heart and mind and that's why I don't believe that I'm pretty and I don't feel pretty at all. Even though I lost weight I still think that I'm fat. I hope I can heal from it soon, because it hurts and it's frustrating. Also I've always wanted to be a singer, but after years of bullying I don't believe that I'm good at it at all so yeah... I still hold scars from the bullyingh years.

But I am not completly healed so that's why I usually have a lot of pathetic breakdowns. Okay so because of the whole depression and cutting my mom became really worried and of course she's worrried since I'm her only child and she can't have another kid. And Also things seem to be getting much better now. Also in 2011 or in the beggining of 2012 I've got a new dog. She's a mix between 2 dogs that idkj and she's said to have 2-3 years now, but they don't know because her teeth a ruined and she had a very harsh life. Also hr name is Enya (after a singer) and that's teh reason why she barks and whines so much xD.

So yeah this is something about my life, that you need to know.

PS. 

I also never won at anything (litterally). So that's a pain in my because I'm a fat loser. and No i'm not seeking for attention (some people may think that), but it's not true so yeah. I'm out bishes :D