♡ https://projectdream4u.kr/members/지슬
JI Seul, the should not.
THE SHOULD NOT
THE HUMAN
TL;DR – A former child model and a high fashion model breaking free from her mother's grasp. They say mother knows best, but Mother Gothel loved Rapunzel for what she had, not for who she was. Seul didn't have a Eugene to cut off that magical hair that Mother Gothel prized, so she filled the role in herself. Seul nabs that sense of freedom to give a whirl at the idol industry she admired from afar. She is ready. Give it all to her. Give her that stupid two-second adlib or that center position, she'll do it with glee. Eventually, she'll realize that she broke out of that cage for another. Will this bird be singing and dancing in the end?
PERSONALITY –
PERSONALITY –
positive. | diligent, vivacious, amiable, supportive.
neutral. | sensitive, playful, fun-loving, easygoing.
negative. | dependent, passive, reserved, anxious.
neutral. | sensitive, playful, fun-loving, easygoing.
negative. | dependent, passive, reserved, anxious.
Seul is a joy to behold, and it isn't just because it's her job to be so. She reels people in with that dignified, confident runway walk, but what makes people stay is that cheerful, attentive smile of hers. The gummy smile that lights her eyes up when her sights land on a familiar face, making the other feel warmly welcomed. That runway walk turns into an excited shuffle to race to their side. Yes, she is the kind of grace and beauty that never imposes. If you expect her to behave as posh as she walks, then you'll soon realize you're just straight-up wrong.
In any social setting, there's an enthusiastic, curious look in her eye. Seul comes alive. Seul always has her eyes peeled for the next new friend to be made. For timid introverts, these are the eyes of a well-meaning hunter. "A friend-shaped person!" She likes to say, "I must befriend!" Indeed, Seul herself is a friend-shaped gremlin who gravitates towards any positive energy in the room. In a blink of an eye, you suddenly have a new best friend. She's the first to extend an invitation and the first to accept one. She's the first to crack a smile and cackle, among the first to poke fun at someone or something, and the one to enable and join in on the chaos. For Seul, companionship was and is her form of freedom. The friends around her are the variety and enrichment in her life. She treasures them dearly.
Don't mistake her to be some ditzy fool though! You see, Seul was always perceptive of those around her. An emotional sponge. Whatever slight energy she is given, she receives loud and clear. Growing up, she's always picked up on the reactions towards her. Being the impressionable kid she was, Seul took these as a way to navigate and determine her circumstances, behaviour, and decisions. Seul is among the first to sense something wrong, reach out, and offer comfort and help. As she grew older, Seul was able to hide the cons of being sensitive to others. She's learned not to take any negative stuff personally (in most cases), but she still can't help but let that energy affect her anyway. It doesn't show on her face but there's a slight nuanced change when it happens. A stiff grin and a tranced gaze, "It's alright!" Yes, in time, she will be.
Her diligence is also the product of this sensitivity to her environment. This is the kind of diligence that's been built, or rather, ingrained since her formative years. Seul is a person who isn't afraid of toil, maintenance, and repetition. Heck, that's been her whole life! While she takes pride in this work ethic, it does not come from a good place. Seul has grown to view improvement as a correlation to her self-worth and validation. Results were what made her mother stop pestering her. Results were what turned the scrutinizing gazes into nods of approval. She would do anything to shake off that feeling of stagnance, not only upon by others but now by herself. Don't get her wrong, she loves putting in some hard work! Though you will definitely see her glowing more when she's working on something that she likes. She's much more initiative too! Work and improvement give her structure in her daily life.
Yet despite all that structure, she isn't as put-together as she'd like to be. Seul grew up with her schedules, transport, and the like being handled by her lovely mother. Seul has never had to take full responsibility for herself, by herself. She's always had someone show her the ropes or take the reins. To put it simply, she's far from being considered a fully functioning adult. Contracts, taxes, finances, and legalities to anything intimidate her. Yet, she knows that this self-sufficiency is the key to freedom. Seul nabbed at independence without putting the work into it. Don't worry, the irony isn't lost on her. Seul is desperately burying this ever-growing anxiety over her future and her own competence as an individual. To her, her life has only begun. She's starting from scratch, but it isn't that way for the people around her. She's clocking into 20, damn it! But there's no going back. Beyond the end of this Dream4U contract is a gamble. Seul could only keep smiling for the camera, absolutely aware of the red light that's seared into her psyche. She heaves out a comical sigh, "I'm so tired." She tilts her head as she forces a bright grin, "So tired, so tired!" This is the only cry for help you'll get from her.
She doesn't do anything about this. Old habits die hard. She lets it all happen while she's paralyzed over how to confront the problem. By the time she's steeled herself, the problem's already gone or turned into a whole different thing. Seul would rather suffer by herself. She instead shifts her focus to the people around her. She takes pride in nurturing her friendships. She showers them with adoration. She makes sure that they know they can depend on her. She doesn't want anyone to feel like the way she did if she can help it. If everybody is happy, then she can grin and bear it. Let her be 'Work Hard, Play Hard' Seul. Let people think she's a happy-go-lucky Seul. The "Good vibes are coming and there's nothing you can do to stop it" Seul. She'd rather be seen as a two-dimensional person than show everyone how much of an internal mess she is. When she's surrounded by friends, it leaves her no time to wallow in her misery. She wants it that way. "Who wants to go on a coffee run with me?" Seul beams, eagerly scanning the other girls to scope their reaction. It's too silent in her head.
BACKGROUND –
2000 - 2015.
When Seul first came to, she was a two-year-old staring right into a camera. The lights were bright, and the flash even brighter. She was mimicking a pose a lady was doing across from her. Seul could only assume that she was her mother. It was a photoshoot for a clothing brand's shopping catalog. She remembered how she stared in confusion into those lenses. Most of all, she remembered how sleepy she was. "Seul, sweetie, smile for mommy!" The lady waved, "We're almost done, baby!" Without another thought, two-year-old Seul flashes a smile.
That was her childhood. Posing for cameras, even outside of those photoshoots her mother would make her do. Seul was a natural with the camera and readily smiled when it pointed towards her, adorned in pretty dresses and accessories. She grew up well, perhaps a little spoiled by her father, but she was well-loved by family and friends. Pictures would be taken during parties and outings. Times like those were when Seul thought that her mother truly adored her, documenting her daughter's life. She thought they'd be for memories. Years later, however, Seul found out that many of those pictures were for building a portfolio for the next modeling gig. All while her father was the main breadwinner, working several hours as a contractor.
Looking back, Seul considers herself lucky that she had found a support system elsewhere. She had friends who looked out for her, friends who would tell stories of their own upbringing, family, and home. Seul slowly slipped into the realization that she didn't have the healthy parent-child relationships they spoke of. Her father's love would come in the form of brand bags, but Seul understood that he was never good at expressing his feelings upfront. But a tinge of unease would always be in her stomach whenever it came to her mother. Did her mother love her so much that she forced her work ethic upon her own daughter? Did she love Seul so much that she took her daughter's career to greater heights than she's asked for? "Seul, this is your calling." Her mother insisted, "And I'll be there to support your career at every step of the way."
2016 - 2019.
It wasn't that Seul didn't enjoy the career she had. At the age of 16, she signed as a model under ESteem. Her mother left her office job in a talent agency to focus on Seul's career as one of her managers. Things were looking up. It's taken her places that she otherwise would not have been. But as Seul's career grew, so would the smile on her mother's face. There it is again. That tinge of unease in her stomach. Seul would see that certain smile when she posed in front of the camera, her mother standing by. She'd see it when she walked the runway. This was not a smile of pride, this was one of delight. She is reaping the benefits from her pretty, little doll.
Seul always had the feeling that her mother had something else planned for herself, something much different than the life that she ended up having. As if her current life fell short of her own expectations. Seul sees it when they come back home from her own schedule, back to the quiet, cozy apartment in Seoul. That self-satisfied glint in her mother's eyes would be replaced by something sullen. A nostalgia for a life she never had. Seul could only piece together the bits that she's heard from her father. Her mother aspired for the kind of glitz and glamour Seul was getting. Alas, the world is full of disappointments. Her mother settled in the face of rejection and failure.
Seul found herself tuning out the music playing overhead as she strutted through the runway, ignoring the groove that was itching to take over her body. Her thoughts wandered as she'd watch videos of dazzling, polished idols singing and dancing to a versatile discography. She wanted to do that too. Oh, how accomplished she would feel if she could do more than just pose and walk. Seul enjoyed her current career, but her inner conflict always came down to her mother. As long as she showed her own daughter off like a doll, Seul could never feel seen as an individual. She appreciates her mother for all that she's done, but she could never truly love her until she gets rid of the carefully built career that her mother holds over her head. The one that she always has to be grateful for, lest she wants to throw her mother into a state of denial.
But Seul realizes that in order to attain that sense of accomplishment and individuality for herself, she will need to upset her mother. Seul has thought on it for years. If she abandoned the modeling career, her mother would be trapped back into a life of normalcy. Her mother would have no reason to stay close to the fashion industry's grandeur with Seul gone unless she wanted to reveal herself to be the leech she was. She'll be left with no power or self-satisfaction. If Seul could get a foot into the idol industry, her mom wouldn't be able to weasel in as she did when Seul was still a minor. Seul needed to liberate herself and force a change in the power balance of the relationship.
Miss Kim Soyeon, ESteem's CEO, was and is a godsend for Seul. Nothing could escape her keen eyes for long. The woman had realized the hidden dynamic between the mother and daughter merely months after Seul signed under the company. One night at a company dinner, the woman took Seul aside to talk, away from her mother's prying eyes and influence. The woman has seen people like Seul's mother who use their clueless children for self-validation. Seul's case had been one that had gone undetected for too long. "If you feel like you want something else for your future," Soyeon made sure she was heard clearly, "I want you to know that you can be honest with me." Seul initially shrugged it off with a nod and a forced smile, assuring the CEO that she had nothing to worry about. But as the years in the contract went by, the CEO's words repeated in her head.
2020.
And so Seul took her up on the offer. Modeling jobs were drying up as the world was adjusting to the pandemic. The high fashion industry was put to a pause. "Runways are cancelled," her mother's jaws were set, a nervous habit. "At least the commercial and catalog shoots aren't taking a major hit, we can take jobs there for now until this whole situation gets better." Seul could only absentmindedly nod as she scrolled on her phone, only to have her sights immediately drawn to a post under MNET's account: Open auditions for Project Dream4U. "I know quarantine will be difficult, but make sure you maintain your look." Her mother turned to look at her, "Okay, sweetie?" Seul only hummed in response. Her mother lost her.
Days after poring over the post and the application details, Seul decided that she didn't want any regrets. She needed to send a message loud and clear. So she chopped her hair off at the cursed hour of 3 AM, making sure she would be at a disadvantage for getting those commercial and catalog jobs. Seul braced for the following day. She'd hurled her mother into a state of shock and disbelief. Seul did not feel as bad she expected to. She later paid a visit to the CEO and discussed her plans going forward, bringing up Project Dream4U. ESteem was primarily a model agency, so while they dabbled in music, they couldn't give her a full-time idol career. So here was the deal: pass the Project Dream4U auditions and the contract would be terminated amicably. If not, Seul would ride out the last year of her contract, removing her mother of the role of manager. She needn't renew if she didn't change her mind.
Before she knew it, Seul was sitting in a waiting room for the next round of auditions. Cramming the audition tapes was worth it, it seems. She smooths over the audition sticker, a free, giddy smile letting up as she observes the other auditionees at their socially distanced seats. Some are up on their feet, going through the motions of their choreography. Others are doing vocal exercises. There's fire in their eyes. Seul feels the adrenaline creeping into her veins. Wait, this won't do! She can't just sit still, that's not what she's here to do for once! She stands up too, getting into her usual stretching routine. Seul starts humming, warming her voice up with her lips still upturned. Is this helping at all? Who knows! If all else fails, she would have won the judges over with her impeccable runway walk and sunny disposition!
JUST A JIGSAW
THE NETWORK
THE IDOL
TWIN(S) – fromis_9's nagyung.
ENTERTAINMENT BACKGROUND –
Seul's never been an idol trainee. She's learned bits of iconic choreography when songs trended and can hold a tune during karaoke nights, but that's it. In the fashion industry, the designers are the stars, not the models.
ENTERTAINMENT BACKGROUND –
Seul's never been an idol trainee. She's learned bits of iconic choreography when songs trended and can hold a tune during karaoke nights, but that's it. In the fashion industry, the designers are the stars, not the models.
Since she was a teenager, Seul was trained in multiple aspects required to excel as a high fashion model. The company's given her lessons to maintain her physique and posture, so Seul knows all those things about form, balance, endurance, etc. However, her dance moves seem stiff, even if she's clearly having fun. It's almost like she's an amateur, enthusiastic cheerleader. That's what happens when dance basics are not drilled into someone for years, of course. It's a given that she's also very comfortable with the camera. No awkward poses and expressions from this girl, it all comes naturally to her.
Project Dream4U presented itself at the right time. Seul wanted the quickest way out of her current career and into the idol industry, so she dove in headfirst. Besides, getting to be part of a whole show? Count her in! She's just absolutely elated that she's doing anything besides posing in front of a camera and walking the runway. She thinks that even if it ends up being tier than expected, she'd at least spent about three years just discovering and being herself. Once she's out of that honeymoon phase, though, she's going to realize that she's going to slam into another wall of self-doubt.
If she had to be honest, she knows that she's shooting in the dark here. Her only option here is to do well and hope that a company would be interested in snatching her up once the contract is done. Seul came into this whole idol industry thing with no backup plan in mind. There's no safety net for her and she doesn't think she'll feel too good about returning to that modeling career. But she knows that now is the time to test herself. She wants to be seen. She wants to discover. She wants to fail and succeed by her own hand.
THE LOVE INTEREST
THE END
COMMENTS – so here's a girl who finds out that discovering herself through some kpop show isn't exactly the best idea in hindsight. she's just doing all the idol stuff ignoring the impending doom (aka an existential crisis). feel free to take her love life wherever direction!!! i didn't have an exact outline planned for it, oop. .. i also just realized that this is my first completed app since 2019.... l o l
SCENE SUGGESTIONS –
– animal crossing letters : members bypassing private communication issues by sending people/each other letters through animal crossing.
– a parent's love : the members receive messages from their family encouraging them. classic mnet . seul's mother appears with a typical heartwarming (scripted) message. seul smiles, not because she is touched, but because she thinks her mom is pathetic. well, she has to smile for the camera anyway. plays along with mnet's tear-jerking tactics.
– a video message : the members are made to do video messages in response to their family's messages. seul keeps it quick and sweet. she tells her mom to take care of herself and her father. seul does not say that she misses them.
– prisonbreak : (some of) the girls sneak out of practice and make a run for it, doing whatever they please in wherever part of seoul they find themselves to be. this creates a citywide game of tag between them and the staff. extra points if both sides are vlogged/filmed.
– local vs foreigner : (could be a cont. of the one above or nah) seul's lack of knowledge of the city showing and... lucy having to give her directions. idk how this happens but it sounds funny in my head--
– seul is seule : (french pun, ba dum tss) the audience analyze seul as the show goes on and note that her demeanour has dampened since the first episode. uhhh, yeah, that's it. make of that what you will SKSKKS. yoochan comes across these posts and feels bad for not noticing?? idk, you choose! :D
– drinkity drink : seul just having a whole laptop out in the kitchen following along with a home cafe recipe becoming a dream4u dorm norm.
– solo mission : where seul is tasked with a mission to cook a slightly more complicated dish than she usually does. with the kind of chaos that you would see in the try guys' 'without a recipe' series.
– uno reverse : yoochan being the one to initiate or confess instead would be kinda interesting is all??? if they go as far as that??? like "oh, so she finally asked you out!" "no, i asked her out." cue bass boosted, incoherent disbelief and whiplash from the rest of the group.
SONG SUGGESTIONS –
– snsd : all night. green light.
– f(x) : all mine.
– oh my girl : cupid. liar liar.
– pristin : wee woo. we like.
– hello venus : hello venus. would you stay for tea.
– stayc : asap.
– dalshabet : someone like u.
– weeekly : tag me.
– cignature : assa.
– fanatics : v.a.v.i. girl.
– playback : want you to say.
– ... may suggest more in the future?
SCENE SUGGESTIONS –
– animal crossing letters : members bypassing private communication issues by sending people/each other letters through animal crossing.
– a parent's love : the members receive messages from their family encouraging them. classic mnet . seul's mother appears with a typical heartwarming (scripted) message. seul smiles, not because she is touched, but because she thinks her mom is pathetic. well, she has to smile for the camera anyway. plays along with mnet's tear-jerking tactics.
– a video message : the members are made to do video messages in response to their family's messages. seul keeps it quick and sweet. she tells her mom to take care of herself and her father. seul does not say that she misses them.
– prisonbreak : (some of) the girls sneak out of practice and make a run for it, doing whatever they please in wherever part of seoul they find themselves to be. this creates a citywide game of tag between them and the staff. extra points if both sides are vlogged/filmed.
– local vs foreigner : (could be a cont. of the one above or nah) seul's lack of knowledge of the city showing and... lucy having to give her directions. idk how this happens but it sounds funny in my head--
– seul is seule : (french pun, ba dum tss) the audience analyze seul as the show goes on and note that her demeanour has dampened since the first episode. uhhh, yeah, that's it. make of that what you will SKSKKS. yoochan comes across these posts and feels bad for not noticing?? idk, you choose! :D
– drinkity drink : seul just having a whole laptop out in the kitchen following along with a home cafe recipe becoming a dream4u dorm norm.
– solo mission : where seul is tasked with a mission to cook a slightly more complicated dish than she usually does. with the kind of chaos that you would see in the try guys' 'without a recipe' series.
– uno reverse : yoochan being the one to initiate or confess instead would be kinda interesting is all??? if they go as far as that??? like "oh, so she finally asked you out!" "no, i asked her out." cue bass boosted, incoherent disbelief and whiplash from the rest of the group.
SONG SUGGESTIONS –
– snsd : all night. green light.
– f(x) : all mine.
– oh my girl : cupid. liar liar.
– pristin : wee woo. we like.
– hello venus : hello venus. would you stay for tea.
– stayc : asap.
– dalshabet : someone like u.
– weeekly : tag me.
– cignature : assa.
– fanatics : v.a.v.i. girl.
– playback : want you to say.
– ... may suggest more in the future?
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