So tired...

 

 

I don't usually rant or complain on here because I like to brighten people's lives, not share the bad stuff in my life, but I don't have anyone in rl that I can talk to (⇀‸↼‶) And I really need to get some frustration out. So yeah... don't read any further if you just follow me for my cute silliness. This will definitely not be that.

 

Tonight my dad demanded something of mine he wanted, then got mad when I tried to say that I didn't want to give it to him because I don't have the money to replace it right now.

 

I ended up having to give it to him.

 

It's the third thing of mine he took today. 

 

This is not a new thing. Anytime anyone in my family wants something of mine they just take it and if I get upset then I'm being ungrateful or bratty.

 

It makes me feel so freaking worthless that I can't even have a say in what happens to my own things. 

 

I can't work because of some health problems I have so the only money I make is when my mom pays me to do her and my dad's laundry (which I have to do whether she pays me or not, along with all the other cleaning in the house), so I can't even replace most of the things that are taken. 

 

I can't even begin to explain how bad I feel. 

 

I fight through pain and not feeling well every day to do all the things they require of me, to then be treated like nothing.

 

I'm so tired. 

 

It's times like this that I really battled between wanting to fight like hell to begin publishing books so that I can support myself and get away from them, or just giving up and not fighting to get better anymore. 

 

I'm just so tired of it all

 

 

Back to Top ↑

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
BabyJongHyol #1
Shout profanity please
watercolor_clouds #2
I just want to say that you're doing the best you can in spite of your circumstances. It's okay to feel tired. You're human. But please take care of your own health and rant as much as you need here. It's better to let your emotions out than bottling things in. Please stay strong. Fighting.
music_lover_Mihue #3
*HUGS* Sometimes people , and it sounds like your family is pretty selfish and uncaring that they are taking things that you have literally worked through pain to get.

I fully believe in karma, and you have a lot of points racked up, and one of these days, when you least expect it, karma will reward you for all the sacrifices you've unwillingly had to make for them, and lift you up out of that existence.

Keep writing, keep looking at your personal goals for your life and fight to complete them. I know you can do it! And when it feels like it is too much, that the exhaustion from fighting to get better, fighting to keep things for yourself from falling into their hands feels like a giant weight that won't leave, know that we are here for you, and if you need any advice or someone to just talk to, I am here for you.
pinaywriter #4
I just read this and I wanna give you a tight hug.
If you can work online, try doing fiverr or getting into a writing website and do writing work.
If you are not comfortable with doing that since that might be too much work, I hope you can get healthy enough to work in the future. Life is never easy for anyone. I hope your family sees that their behavior is affecting you greatly. I can't say that you shouldn't get attached to things because I get that way too at times. I think the act of taking something that is yours against your will is what makes it difficult to accept and hurts. Please know someone is praying for you. I hope that gives you a bit of comfort.
momiji2075 #5
Dont let them get to you! Stay strong, busy yourself and find online jobs as possible outlets and start earning your keep and use it for yourself. A family must know how to take care of each other if tbey are not doing it to you you dont need to feel oblogated to do anything for them. Nothing wrong in focusing on your own needs if no one else is doing it for you! Hang in there! And pray always! God does wonders you will feel it coming in His time!
DaeJeayo #6
Hmmm... So what do I say about this? *sits on bed staring at laptop screen trying to think of those things called words*
Nah nothing coming to mind. Bleh. So! Best I can do is send you a virtual hug and then go on a hunt for some cute images and stuff to send you when I have a chance again (ah life loves being busy at the wrong times)

As for that last part though, I *don't say it* TOTES *gahdammit, man!!* understand that feeling your going through. But don't give up! Remember my plane ticket!!! Lol. But seriously though, my plane ticket. Also remember, and I know you won't, giving up is gonna get you nowhere. So rather keep fighting as hard as you can. Publishing a book is more than just an escape for you. It's one of your biggest dreams. Don't give up on that regardless of what your family does. Just keep on working towards it and as soon as you have that opening and opportunity to go for it and you're able to then YEHET!!! And then get my plane ticket (^v^)

*Folks, if you read up, you will see words that were thought to not be able to be made. Isn't that something*

Okay I'm gone now! Lol
Icetokyoghoul95 #7
I'm really bad with words. But you shouldn't take what they say to heart. You're an amazing person. Just stay strong and everything will be fine. Don't give up.
Ps. I don't know you personally, but I love you 💚.
lightdanger #8
i'm sorry to hear this, but always stay positive and if they want to take something from you again then just talk back next time .... I know this isn't a very good tactic but sometimes you just have to speack out your opinion even if you'll be called bratty or anything like that. Say that they should buy the things they want themselves and if they don't have the money for it or don't have time to buy it then they should wait patiently and not take what is yours. They can ask and borrow yours but don't take it .. that isn't right.

If they call you ty names for saying your opinion then don't take it to your heart ... they'll say these things because they are angry because they can't get they things they want to have ... and if a perosn is angry they tend to say things that they actually don't mean. I'm sure that your parents/family loves you.... they just can't ask their wishes properly ... BE STRONG AND DEFEND YOURSELF! pls stay healthy and never stop to fight! because if you fight there will be changes! if you don't fight then nothings going to change! STay strong¨! :)))
mikanponchan #9
:) hi. I know most of here will comment that they understand your situation and that it's okay everything will be fine etc so, I will just cheer you! Calm down first and think 10 times before making a decision. If you think you can start supporting yourself, do it slowly like what you have said maybe by publishing a book and as long as that 'job can make you happy.. why not trying it right? :)) IDK your setup with your parents so I can't advise you to talk your problems with them but, sharing your problems here lessen the burden inside you don't worry like you I don't like posting my personal problems because I fell like I'm spreading some negativity.. it's okay gurl your post is harmless hehe I hope this comment can uplift your mood :) STAY POSITIVE!
BabyEri #10
They shouldn't take your things :( that is just terrible >:| I hope you can start publishing your books because i really love your works. I'll buy even though I'm far away!

But in the meantime, would you like to try kofi? I've seen creators using it :)
sarcasticdevil #11
I don’t know how to comfort you... this happens quiet a lot of times in a family... stay strong okay?? Fighting!!!
Shinycrown #12
it's okay to feel tired and upset some times but never forget that things will always get better! life is a like roller coaster, when you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go is up!
Luc4sLuke #13
I don't know how to help you more than wish you to stay strong, believe in yourself and sending lots of hugs and love. I think that you need to initiate a talk with your parents, to let them know your perspective. They might listen to you, you might understand their reasons or they yours. I also think that you might benefit if you could talk to someone you trust, someone that you could share in detail your problems and could help you with better advice...
Don't give up, stay strong and I hope you'll publish soon and also that your health improves every day. Think positive!
kimVjkook #14
Uhm you know parents can be tiring sometimes but don't feel bad about it this is how family works. If you try to show your anger they will only think you are being stubborn. Keep your cool try to tell them calmly that these treatments hurt you cry if you feel like. They are your parents they should understand you. I don't know anything about your family situation but I would tell sometimes try to think this way that doing something for your family should always not have a payback, they do more to grow us up as a healthy and good child right? so try to bear with them sometimes as well. Emotions can't always be controlled so show it whenever you feel wrong but calmly. It's hard to keep cool but that's the only convincing language. Stay strong. Hope you get published soon :) Good luck
Back to Top ↑