Most of the writing and attention seems to go to MDD (Major Depressive Disorder) and the melancholic types of depression. I guess, as someone with anergic atypical depression, I just wanted to raise a little awareness for other less common types of depression in light of recent events.

Atypical depression's main difference from MDD is that you can actually feel somewhat happy when something good happens. It's not like bipolar where you'll go manic for no reason, but your mood can get better with significant positive events. The other major symptoms are hypersomnia, an increased appetite or weightgain, a heavy, leaden feeling in your body, and sensitivity to interpersonal rejection that eventually leads to social impairment.

I have the anergic version of that, which essentially adds an extreme lack of energy and motivation at all times, even when my mood is better due to my mood reactivity.

I can easily leave dishes so long that mould starts growing on them, leave doing laundry so long I literally have no clean clothes and am rotating between clothes that seem less dirty, not shower for weeks, and just not move from my bed all day. I can stay inside for weeks. If I had someone to fetch me food, I would probably never leave the house and live in a constant state of chaos. It's not that I don't care, I literally don't have the energy to do anything about it and that makes me hate myself more, because why can't I just get up and do ?

But I guess that's my point. Sometimes depression looks like someone who is just being lazy. They never leave their room - which has garbage and clothes all over the floor - they never do any chores, not even taking the garbage out, and they never leave their bed no matter how filthy it or they are. They play video games all day or watch videos, or hell - just sleep all the hours away. Seriously, all of them. I slept 36 hours in a row a couple of weeks ago, and most days I sleep at least 12 hours, if not up to 14.

I don't really know how to wrap this up. I guess, first of all - someone can still be depressed as even if they seem to get happy when they hang out with their friends or do fun stuff.

Second of all, extreme laziness, like I described above, might not be as simple as that. 

It's a hell of a lot harder to get better when you not only have to force up the motivation to do even the simplest of things, but you're also permanently so tired you could cry.

I don't know what kind of depression Jonghyun had, and likely only those close to him might, if even them. I guess I just wanted to contribute to the heightened depression awareness that is going on surrounding his death.

And a word for the man himself from me: I was never really a SHINee fan. Casual listener, at best. But they were always just, there, ever since I got into kpop. They seemed such a steady and reliable group, especially Taemin and Jonghyun with their solos. I guess I did something akin to take them for granted, or rather I realised that I took most people for granted in kpop. Sure, I know some of my faves suffer with mental health but... you think that if they're busy and successful it'll never happen because their dreams are being realised. I think for me this was just yet another lesson of how life is short and often ends abruptly, and to never take anyone or anything for granted.