well...another off day...

another random blogpost when i could do better things...(like what?)

i just like talking to no one...

talking to someone/anyone is hard...but talking to no one is hella easy words just fall out naturally without thinking anything...

so let's talk a few random stuffs...

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1.

^ nice song? i just love acoustic stuffs...

thanks to this nice song...i managed to update poem today...and even better...i was inspired enough to have written my first song form of poetry...a territory i kept chickening out from trying...but now that i tried once...i want to do it again...^^...of course, that depends on my feelings/inspiration...rhyme is not that important for this form...but since i'm such a rhyme freak...i keep wanting to do rhymes even for types of poetry that doesn't emphasize on it...

another thing i like n dislike about song form is...that usually...it's rather straightforward and not too deep/ambiguous...well, i think it's not a requirement...you can be as ambiguous as you want...but when it's song...i feel it's important to connect with the readers/listeners emotion and the easiest way is to not make them confused with the depth...personally i prefer poems that are so ambiguous that the readers might come up with a completely different interpretation than what the writer intended....i feel that it enrich the poem in some ways...i think i fell in love with these diversity in interpretation ever since i had a couple courses in poetry interpretation n teaching of poetry...and coming up with interpretations not stated in the textbooks, and having your lecturer actually encouraging discussions on possibilities of your different interpretation made me feel that...wow...poetry is so....enchanting n mysterious...it can be as shallow or as deep as you perceive it...no rights or wrongs...it's all about you...from that moment...i kinda harvested love for poetry with layers...n lose interest in the ones too straightforward...

anyway, i do have straightforward ones too...but i just prefer ones that made you stop...and think...possibilities are boundless...don't limit your mind...i like how poetry could help to convey that idea...

Song though...is a form that i feel need to emotionally connect with the readers/listener...i never had the courage to try this form...until today...

i'm sincerely thankful to this song/perf for lending me some feels to go through....^^...

and possibly i'm gonna use the feels i get from this perf for fic inspiration as well...gotta recycle n reinterpret dem feels for as much as you can...since it's hard to find new songs that can give inspirations lately....T^T...

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2. 

i wanted to update my recommendation list...but i've scrolled like 6 pages(just 6????) and i already felt sick n like giving up entirely...i know there are gems lying in the depths of the dungeon here, unappreciated and awesome...but it's hard to find them....T^T...any idea? i have no idea...and i'm giving up...

oh...one thing that i notice that really turn me off...

is when female idols are used as in their picture, and even their name...yet there would be OC in bracket...like...why must they be OC when they're clearly...the existing female idol...from looks to name to everything??? i don't get it....i want to read fics of my female idols too...but when i see them being made 'oc'...while the male idols were allowed to not be oc....yeah i clicked out ASAP...

and i've been seeing some discussions...

and wondering...

why must writers be deemed 'unfair to readers' when they don't update their fics for a long while...? you see, when writers complaint about readers not commenting...they'd be told this....'write for yourself'....ok...so then writers 'write for themselves'...following this piece of brilliant advice....so...why when it comes to not updating stories they write for themselves...suddenly...they're not being fair to readers? why the double standard? i could never understand...

but hey...try not to bring in argument...bcuz my questions are meant as rhetorical...since i'm in the mood of blabbering alone...

no matter what excuse is given...you know i won't agree on this double standard...or whatever you'd sugarcoat it as...

right now i feel that i've grown content...to write for myself...so i don't feel pressured to update or anything...haha...having no reader is a privilege too it seem...i can be as undisciplined as i want...no unnecessary guilt...sorry if i sound mean, my readers(if there are still any)...i'm just following the biggest advice spread out in fanfic writing world...write for myself... :)

and i'm not talented enough to digest n practice contradicting advices...so...

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3.

SS301 comeback...

i feel bad to say this but i kinda forgot the song right after it ended...

it's not even that bad...but if they're to make impact forreal with the music rather than emotional effect of reunion...i feel they need a stronger track...

i never understood the hype of UR Man btw...it's one of the most annoying songs imo...but then again...i found Gee(SNSD) n Tell Me(Wonder Girls) extremely annoying too...but somehow...it's always songs i found annoying that became big hits...erk...lol.

Even when Rainbow sang the reply song to UR Man...i hated that song too...it had the similar annoying vibe...with a lil less annoyance level but amp up on the weirdness...

those were the days...

but i feel if they have Jungmin together...it could make a lot of difference...no bias...i have always regard Jungmin as one who excel at bringing song n perf to life...him and Kyujong to me are the emotional singers while Youngsaeng n Hyungjun are the technical ones...i never knew where to rate Hyunjoong since to me he's always been just the popular member i would ignore since everyone's all over him(that is, until his scandal n lots of ppl who used to care only him pretend they he never exist in their eyes...and they've always cared for the rest....riiiiteee)

tbh...i like both Hyungjun n Jungmin equally for their voices back then...but watching their solo careers/concerts/stages...i can't help feeling disappointed with Hyungjun...while Jungmin never fail to rock n own his stages entirely with just singing like he really wanted it...no gimmicks...he always just own his stages with merely singing...

plus...i just like Jungmin's music preference overall anyway, compared to other members...Youngsaeng n Kyujong( maybe Hyunjoong too) seemed like they tried different styles...but Hyungjun n Jungmin have always seemed set on the kind of music they like...

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i feel very productive today...writing wise...

i updated a fic, wrote a poem...and have picked up a song to translate now...

gotta enjoy that off day before the gloomy days be back...

ps: i just found out Ladies also sang ost for Kimjoon's drama...omg...i love whenever i can connect my favs in some ways....xD

okay...i'ma leave you with of course...my loves...

as much as i don't favour this kinda songs for them...but i guess...i've come to accept that Rainbow like these styles...and they'd know this kinda style won't make them big...but if they genuinely like it....n chose to do it anyway as title song....more power to them for looking past popularity n rank factor...plus, i love seeing them have fun...n Jaekyung...how do i say it....i think i'm too in love with Jaekyung...aaaaahh!!!...no not that love...just that...she's just too damn admirable...she always has 200% energy n enthusiasm in whatever she does...that passion...n she's such an ahjumma too...a overly gorgeous one at that...i mean there's no way you can hate her unless you really bad....like seriously....but it's not like other members aren't lovable too...aaahh...it's hard...they really live up to their name as Rainbow...all having their own colours...n am i seeing Noeul n Yoonhye having more parts? /tears of joy/...anyway, Rainbow best stages will always be on university festivals n such unbroadcasted stages...bcuz they always go crazy all out there...

i love these girls...so much..all seven of them....T^T...

please keep colouring my life, Rainbow <3

<3 (though after all these years...SeungA still seems kinda unconfident...T^T...you're doing fine girl...really...i remember similar expression from her during Gossip Girl days when she had so many parts...she needs to get more parts...or better yet, a solo....*_* )

 

-edit-

the moon is shining so brightly outside...i just noticed...

full moon...

beautiful.

i wish it would rain though...

oh well...

gotta be grateful...always. :)