well...just scattered thoughts/feels...of unimportant things as usual...lol...

1. persistence. i'm just happy...even though it's still not a perfect result...but my patience n persistence in pursuing sth not important has finally start to be rewarding(now if only i can have same determination in real life)...i've been trying for years(yes, you read that right) to download a certain Storm show...even though i keep failing but i keep coming back to try every now and then...and guess what....i succeeded to download at least some parts of the episodes now...which i might upload on my yt soon after making significant cuts. i know it's stupid to feel this way but i feel...a sense of achievement...tsk...pathetic...just like when i keep looking for a certain a'st1 perf that seemed impossible to find on the net cuz someone asked for my help to find it, n found it after like a year of searching...though this one took longer persistence...

well, i haven't upload any of my new trashtreasures yet but here's some of my recent translations done for these fab girls...

^ beautiful song...

2. sameness/lack of originality...

now even happens in blogposts...i like blogwalking whenever i'm bored and lately i notice there's a particular topic everyone's talking abt which i bet ya know if you blogwalk in aff too haa...some even say they're just blogging about it cuz everyone's been talking bout it......what? why? why do people love getting on bandwagons so much? why not just talk about what you genuinely feel like talking about regardless if everyone or anyone at all talk of it? why not just one person start a discussion of a trending hot topic n everyone jump in there to discuss n that's that instead of dragging it everywhere? i know it's your own rights...it just make things look sloppy for me...without even real passion/genuine sentiment n concern put into the topic...bcuz some people just want to say their opinion(or even lack of) about topic everyone's talking about everyday(seriously, back then there's a hot topic everyone got on bandwagon blogging about n one of the blog said abt her lack of opinion on it in two lines n that's that)...ok....i'ma stop complaining...

3. inspired + ahjussitp/crush

remember this?

now STOP if you're gonna start mention anything exo(eventhough i am aware i'm the one mentioning it first here now haa) bcuz i'm just fking ING annoyed with all those exo stans infiltrating all comment section for this song vids/perfs with all the 'exo oppar brought me here'...'exo oppar daebak'...n blabla....who fking care for your oppar in someone else's video? certainly not me. ugh. n some even rude enough to bash the original or call them 'look creepy'...'daebak everyone's talking bout exo oppar' in the original singer's damn videos n worse i saw 'they're lucky exo cover their song or nobody would listen to it...' da!...and you're wondering why people hate your fandom...with so many having severe lack of basic manners/respect or even at all...(now don't you dare to come nag me here...at least i don't go trashtalk them/the fans or fangirl unrelated peeps on your oppar's vid...)

back to the song n how i discovered this band...it's kinda random...i first discovered the song back in 2008 or sth by a female singer in WGM or sth...n i thought that was the original...until i heard another song by this band - Dream of a Doll in romantic n idol(seungah scene!) that i thought all these while as loveholic's song...n found the group...that happen to be a loveholic's member former band...and that's how i discover this song again n learnt that they're the real singers(no, exo didn't even occur in any part of the story until i see comments on my weather forecast oppars video that annoy the crap of me)

the mv above is just so cute n dorky too n instant love. And i learnt that even Loveholic's popular song 'If Only You're Here/If Only I Have You'...was actually Weather Forecast song too originally! i went on listening spree n fell for a couple other of their songs...but it's only few days ago i decided to translate some of their songs i really like...and cue deeper interest/curiosity growing on them...Weather Forecast is made of Mr. Park n Mr. Kang n being in mainstream indie-ish(not really indie though) rock band Loveholic...naturally, Mr.Kang is the popular one(for me at least) but it only made me so darn curious of Mr.Park...bcuz he's....intriguing n cuz i just know less of him i guess? though i really barely know both of them...

and then i discover that he's currently quite active as soloist...n he's kinda indie-ish too...which intrigued me more...since he did have some hits he composed back in the day(both of them compose their duo's songs...though as usual...Mr.Kang did more of the ballads, just like in Loveholic) but Mr.Park's indie-ish feels more widespread/self promoted/less mainstream/etc. n idk who of them two are more mainstream or known in Kr tbh...though internationally i'm pretty sure Mr.Kang is more known.

In their 3rd album...probly their most successful one...they had two title songs...'I Like You' composed by Mr.Park n 'Dream of a Doll' composed by Mr.Kang...i'm not sure which is the bigger hit...but i think both are very well known songs.

i'm just...curious...when i go for the group's name...i think Mr.Park is more associated to it...though Mr.Kang definitely made more of their music. (sorry, i just realize how wrong i am with my assumption...they both made more or less same amount of music...probly Mr.Park even more by slight...idk) Mr.Kang is like hardly associated with it anymore...but Mr.Park would sometimes mention/tag his name too...so...you know where i'm heading?

fanfic feels.

LOLz.

i'm so curious of their relationship, history, story n everything...so much that i want to write a story of/for it...but since you (should)know i love mixing reality-based things(events/traits/etc.) with fiction n blend them to confusion...i feel like i need to know them moreee...since i barely know....at least i want to know the reason of their breakup n if they're still in good terms or whether they still meet...i think Mr. Park especially...despite just starting to learn of him, his music n get any impression from him this recent few days...i'm really...intrigued...lol...there'soverwhelming burst of emotions i get from him that i feel hard to describe in coherent words but maybe not so hard in fanfic eh.../wiggleseyebrows/ sometimes i feel he's trying to cling on so hard on his past glory, sometimes i feel he's freespiritedly n boldly pursuing his passion instead of more traditional fame route, sometimes i adore n respect him n sometimes i pity him for no reason...it's just too much flavours of emotions.....Mr.Kang is mysterious too sometimes i feel he's superior in musicality, sometimes i feel he's just trying to hide his insecurity, sometimes i wonder if he's happy to be where he is n what he accomplished, catching up with time, being trendy n all....or whether he feels missing other thing...but he's definitely more mainstreamish n seem to maybe be more quiet/shy n serious while Mr.Park seem more cheerful, expressive n idk young at heart? idk...these contradiction of traits n fates in these two i find highly engaging for me...that could make for moving fanfic material...bcuz the reality version of them already moved me even without knowing much...their music moved me, and the passion. or maybe i'm just too imaginative...lol.

it doesn't help when i find this awesome moving stuff that brought me to tears T^T (probly bawling is more accurate?)...n healed me in some ways...that song is amazing n i didn't know Mr.Park could make awesome ballad rock inspiring healing song like that...i need to stalk more of this guy's stuff....good thing he's very much tech-acquainted n make good use of internet....;) (i hope he would upload more of WF old perfs though...so hard to find the live ones...(the ones i posted here were stolentaken from his blog n reposted)

so anyone who know any story(as in real story, not fanfics) of them...would you mind share with me? i'd appreciate it... :)

some of their songs that i just translated n subbed cuz i lurve the songs...

^ love the freespiritedness of this song...i'm surprised Mr.Kang's the composer of it since he's so well associated with ballads than quirky stuffs...he impressed me here...

^ also composition of Mr. Kang. i totally love the sound of this. the lyrics came off kinda cheesy at first but then i feel it went kinda dark/serious/cryptic-ish...?....

some live performances cuz them just awezome...

^ composed by Mr.Park. i wonder if the beautiful kim n lee were actually referring to just random surnames or their actual gfs or sth lol...as much as i love LH's cool songs n how the members have such cool vibes...n compositions...i kinda prefer seeing this simpler happy ver of Mr. Kang in WF...they both project this more humble, silly quirky feels...which idk but i feel mr.park's style/expressiveness kinda set the tone for WF...just my guess...

^ composed by Mr. Kang. actually...this is the perf that made me...so inspired...firstly...it's awesome perf. secondly...dem feels just from watching the understated interaction between them....sobs...i love me some bromance...

^ i just adore how he's always passionate n expressive...afterall, i'm not one who is easily impressed by technical singers(most time they bored me no matter how amazing their techniques are)...but it's the emotive/expressive ones that capture my attention...

^ Brick's version...Brick is Mr. Kang's group after Loveholic ended(i think)...and...i don't like this. i mean...it's not that bad, i like the smooth flow despite the choppy breathing(suddenly i'm getting all technical...lol)...but i obviously prefer the emotional power in Mr.Park's voice than this(n of course i prefer WF ver the best since dem otp feels)...i like Mr. Kang...i mean...i knew him way before i knew the existence of Mr. Park but,...when i heard he has a new band...i was hoping he'd be the singer....apparently not, damnit he's been in the shadows long enough in loveholic where everyone only ever hear Jisun n acknowledge her as Loveholic even though the music came from the two guys...and i tried some of Brick's music but i'm not feeling their Brick's music either surprisingly....so....yeah...after listening a few times...i kinda like this particular perf...but i still don't love or get the raw feels i prefer...

and of course the more popular ver. Loveholic.

and some random songs...

^ not new song, and not this group's song either, ...but this is Mr.Kang's group after WF...n this is composed by Mr.Lee, the Loveholic member who usually compose the quirky/upbeat songs while Mr.Kang compose the ballads...just sharing it here since i just translated this recently too...

^ find this song familiar? yeah...i always thought it's loveholic's song originally...but apparently...some months ago...i found the real original one...it's in their 5th album...

but lo n behold...there's another ver...

^ Mr. Kang's solo ver of the song...apparently he had a solo album too...before loveholic i think.

and the most popular ver. Loveholic's...

bonus:

^ while you might wonder what does park jung min has to do with anything being talked here...this song taken from PJM's first (independent)album released under his own company/production in 2014...was the only 1 out of the 10 songs(5 Korean,5 Japanese) where the lyrics weren't written by the singer himself but the composer...who happens to be Mr.Kang...from my observation...Mr. Kang rarely have his composition sung by idols...but SS501 PJM has been getting solo songs from Mr.Kang from the time SS501 was active...i wonder what's so special abt PJM(to mr. kang i mean)...but i do think JM has goodamazing taste in music simply bcuz i love Mr. Kang's compositions too lol(well, and i love other composers he work with for their music too). if you look for Mr. Kang's discography as a composer...you won't find this song since the albums were only released in Japan...PJM wrote the lyrics for Japanese ver but Mr. Kang wrote for Korean version. i was surprised to learn of Mr. Kang's involvement in the album tbh...when i was just thinking of how i missed loveholic...well, this was before i had this ahjussitpcrush problem with WF as a group...and found myself not caring for other groups my ahjussitp been in rather than them n just them...yikes.

and while finishing this post that i started from yesterday(i mean...look at the length...)...i heard of a news of a friend's loss...of her friend i don't really know of...whom i hope anyone sees this would pray for to be in better place with no more pain...losses always make me feel wistful...gloomy...and thinking of death...not that i don't already think of it every now n then...now...it made me think of people and things i take for granted...people and things i let go easily...to go back to change mistakes.....it's hard for me...but what i will encounter in the future will i change anything for the better or just let thought be merely another fleeting thought?....i think that makes all the difference of the importance of realization...or not...what we do with that realization...or if we do anything or not...one thing for sure...we'll never be prepared for it...whether to go through it...or to have the ones we care for go through it...maybe 1% will be 'prepared'...but it'd be lucky to be in that 1% but super hard too...i'm so disconcerted by this...that i decide to just accept all reqs instead of caring so much of genuineness/privacy or whatever...maybe when my composure n pride comes back...i'll do (mildly)crazy thing like remove everyone again...but...

this life is meaningless anyway...

cherish what you got to cherish while you can...

a self reminder too...though i hardly listen to my own advice...:/

and it's kinda sick n selfish for me to say this...but i kinda even envy her...life is so temporary...that it's better to be dead and loved than alive and loathed...or insignificant...even though i didn't know her at all...i could see she's so loved by all her friends which must mean she's a great friend to them...it randomly...reminds me of a girl i met in my first office job...we weren't close at all..probly she's the girl i talked to the least from my team...we just had different personalities n she's really young, the youngest in our team while i was in the 'elder line'(though not the oldest mind you lol)...n i don't feel comfortable around popular fashionable loud outgoing kids since i'm the opposite(and opposite don't always attract)...we only ever had one painly awkward courteous conversation n it was few days before her death when we sat next to each other during a quiet late lunch...she was involved in accident with her boyfriend...but there were suspicion that her boyfriend had beaten her up too n that it's not 'real' accident that caused her horrible condition before she eventually died days later... from evidences and ongoing fights between them n suspicious position in the car(the bf tried to frame her as the one driving the car or something even when the injuries/car condition n her position in the car all don't quite match) though her mom told she thought the boyfriend was a decent guy when we went to the hospital to visit her in comma since he's even met the family n all...n the boyfriend then fking ran away out of the country or sth... before the police could get him for investigation...which kinda gives away whether or not he's innocent as his parents claimed...what a joke...her friends were so mad at him and went on net hunting for him too, gathering people...

but one thing i notice is how loved she is...even couple of years after her death...her friends still wished her birthday on fb...though i don't feel it's of any use to show your love after one can no longer see/feel it...maybe it would be better shown/felt through prayers instead of mediums that don't matter to her anymore...but still....to those alive n watching...it's sweet...n kind of...enviable...

as i watch...i know even my one real life best friend most probably won't know when my time comes...unless she decide to snoop around which we don't really do...we just really respect each other's privacy that much...haa...

hmm...life is so temporary...some people leave the world to better place and most other, to worse place. it's just a matter of time and yeah...life is so temporary...even memory ends once everyone holding it dies...but love is eternal or is it?...not even love...maybe truth is. and God of course. and afterlife. and because everyone who leaves only ever go to a better OR a worse place than where we are...don't feel too sad for the deceased if we're confident they're heading to the better place...even if being sad on our own temporary loss is inevitable...since we're all heading death anyway...

well, to end...i'll just....

^ oh how i love these one-sided love lyrics that gives goosebumps kinda...it's amusing how i always say i hate ballads but then my fav songs turn out to be ballad-ish...well, to be fair...this is more to rock-ballad(sometimes labeled as modern rock?) instead of headache-inducing sappy ballad...erm...

and just cuz this deserve to be watched again...

i hope it can send strength or healing to whoever in need of 'em...

ps: i have a feeling i will....really end up writing this one(fic)...