Thursday, 5th September 2013 (The next day)

She's back home at 6pm which was quite early considering she usually stays up to 8pm to finish up her work. Kwill had to attend a radio broadcast so he will only be back at 9pm. She had been contemplating throughout the day on whether to find out more about her past. All along she had been avoiding that since she really was afraid of the emotional burden of the loss of her parents if she recovers her memories with her parents. But curiousity got into her head and she really wished to learn about her childhood. She felt that something was missing from her life. She really wanted to remember her parents. It would be selfish of her to wish to forget them just to not get hurt. Hence, she's decided on finding her past.

Taking advantage of his absence, she went to his room to search for more clues. Things like photo albums containing his childhood pictures. She went to his room and knowing where he puts his albums since she helps him with his laundry, she went straight towards his wardrobe. She pulled one of the bigger drawers and sat in front of it. She took out an album first.

It's Kwill's more recent pictures so she put the album aside. She took another one. It contains Kwill's 1990 pictures. She decided to look through to see if that album contains her photos. She doesn't even know if she's close to Kwill enough to have her in his pictures. However, she had to try her luck if she wanted something out of this.

She flipped to the second page and she immediately saw a young toddler which looked like her. She lost her past photos after she moved to the orphanage so she had no idea how she looked when she was much younger.

Pictures of her and him in the playground or someone's house... Another album which contained 1989 photos had one photo of her in a baby bathtub . She smiled at the pictures, admiring her seemingly happy childhood. She must have been very close to him. There was one photo of a 5-year-old Ga-in kissing Kwill on the cheek.

She took out the last childhood album he had taken before the accident. It was a 1994 album and was relatively thinner than the other albums she saw earlier. She opened and she recognised herself instantly without having to stare and see if it was herself. It was the year before her accident so that face of hers was the youngest she was familiar with.

There was finally one picture of her with two adults which seemed to be her parents due to it looking like a family shot. She stared at their faces and flashes of memories ran through her mind. At that moment, she blanked and was confused for a moment.

It's working!

She tried to recall further but she couldn't. She hurriedly flipped through the pages to look for other photos which may trigger her memories. Other pictures of her with Kwill's aunt and probably a baby Lizzy. Pictures of her and Kwill having fun playing with baby Lizzy at the park. Pictures of her celebrating her birthday with her family. More memories started to build up on the previous ones. Her head, however, started to hurt from the overwhelming memories. She hesitantly put away the albums and groggily staggered out of the room while clutching her head. She went to her room and laid on her bed. She still tried her best to build on the vague flashes of memories she recalled earlier but she couldn't anymore. The headache was torturing her so much she decided to just stop for the time being. She popped a sleeping pill into and swallowed it with her saliva.

As her eyes close, she hugged onto the rabbit plush toy tightly, as if she needed something close to her right now. She held it close to her nose and unconsciously inhaled the unpleasant smell of saliva which she liked so much.Unexpectedly, a sudden picture of her chasing Kwill with the doll she's holding. But before she could even hold on to the picture, the sleeping pill took it's effect.

...

Kwill is back home but couldn't find her anywhere on the first floor. He called for her as he climbed the stairs.There was no response from her so he searched for her, wondering if she was out. There she was, sleeping soundly on her bed. Not wanting to disturb her with his presence, he carefully made his way out of her room with slow, light steps.

...

9 September 2013

Holding this secret in without sharing her problems was tough. It was about time someone had to lend her a listening ear and maybe even give her advice. She didn't know what to do. Regaining her memories wasn't an easy task at all, let alone by herself. These past few days, the flashes of memories which she got on the 5th kept replaying in her mind anywhere and anytime, not without giving her migraines. Whenever she was alone and trying to recall even further, more than those flashes of memories she already experienced, nothing came out of it. Stressed as she already is from her work load , the new burden of hers wasn't helping her at all.

"Unnie... " She mumbled as she looks at JeA into the eyes and her unnie could already sense vulnerability from Ga-in.

JeA invites her into her house and brings her to the couch. JeA prepared two cups of hot chocolate and brought them to her.

"Hot chocolate to bring your mood up!" She exclaimed as she handed her the warm cup. Ga-in sipped a little before she started to talk.

"I'm starting to recall a little about my past." Ga-in shared.

"Omo! Good for you then!" She paused. "Ah... I forgot you didn't want to recover them because of..."

"I can't avoid my past for my entire life anyway. I don't want to be selfish for wanting to forget my parents in order to avoid the misery. " she explained. "But that's not the point unnie."

"Then?"

"Hyungsoo and I actually knew each other before my amnesia. " she said, earning a surprised look from her unnie.

"Your husband?! How's... What's going on? How did you know?" She gasped.

Ga-in explained how she got to know about their relationship and that Kwill probably knew about this but kept this a secret from her. She also shared her dilemma of whether to tell her husband the truth.

"Why not? Since he probably knows a lot about you, shouldn't you just tell the truth and ask him more about your past?" JeA convinced.

"I don't know, unnie. I'm not prepared to ask him. He definitely had a reason to not tell me about this. I don't know what reason he has but by revealing that I already know about this, I'm afraid of his reactions and whether if I'm ruining any plans he might have. I don't know what to expect from him and I fear that. Besides I haven't totally recovered yet so I don't want to heighten his expectations only to disappoint him.But I'm really curious and want to ask him so badly about my past. Trying to recall by myself is really tough and painful. I really wish for someone who knows about my past can prompt me whenever I try to recall the past."

"That's a really tough decision to make..." JeA scratched her head.

" Why not let us help you? " JeA suggested. "I know we don't know anything about your past. We can still be there to help you out, be it anything. If this doesn't help, we have no choice but to tell your husband the truth," she continued.

...........................................

spoiler: 

Ga-in's birthday and unnie's plan