I could have tried my childhood all possible adjectives. Perhaps if she had taken a different course, nowadays I look backwards and say that she had been a drug. It was very full of losses. No child deserves something. But understand, my childhood did not take a good turn. I'm not in college like most people I knew at the time. I am not also working to take care of my family made "unplanned" and even chasing a dream. And that's why, the perfect judge, the best part of my entire life. Days when deep breath an air filled with smoke in a chaotic city and jump rope with the girls (as always been a rubbish football) was all he needed to have a long smile plastered on my face.

I miss that time.

In fact, to this day I wonder how it became so, as I moved to that point. Sometimes I see pictures of that time and I wonder if the image is not lying. It really exist? That was really me? Sometimes I reached the conclusion that this was impossible.
As a chubby smiling boy had become this bag of bones with walking zombie guy?
This is the effect of drugs. I think.

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- Appa?
- What was Ryeowook, I'm late for work. - My father had a tired expression, which made me a little guilty about disturbing him. His face was beautiful, yes, very beautiful. But the dark circles and mistreated by the sun skin was certainly ruining all its beauty.
My father's name is Kim JonKi, he was 22, working in two shifts, a night and another the morning basically slept all afternoon, and that was the time when I was in school because at that time I was only 4 years. It's not that he did not care for me, he was just too tired to show it frequently. Funny and, even then, I understood that. But I wanted to be with him also that day in particular.

- Appa, I did it for you. - Stretched black necklace in her direction, the writing was one "I love Daddy" in a kind pendant with colored alphabet. I had actually done it, was to be a locksmith, but I found that matched much but it was a necklace.

He took the necklace my hands giving a weary sigh before smiling at me, misaligning my hair with her hand and bowing to kiss my forehead.

- Thanks. - I saw him put the necklace and gave a smile, waving at him before running back to the house. I did not look backwards, because there was already decorated the scene. Every day was the same, he always called the bike and waved smiling at me as he accelerated, moving away.

But that day ... I repented for not having looked at. Because that was the last time I saw him. That same night, my mother and I received the news that my father had suffered an attempted robbery while working in the company making deliveries, he tried to respond in a moment of silliness, and was killed with a shot to the head.
And that was the first time I saw my mother cry like there's no tomorrow. At that time I did not understand what was going on, so I held her tightly and asked her not to cry. I say: "Do not cry Omma, Appa will be sad to arrive and see you like that."
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I certainly had to hurt that day. And to think that I needed three months to find out what is "Was traveling to the sky, and may not return" or "He's here, in your heart."

What a fool I was.

Another thing that I miss that time, it was my ability to cry. I cried whenever she felt pain, even if only a drop with a little grated as bruising. I could cry just so. I wonder now if my tears dried up, maybe yes, because even when I feel a lot of pain, even when I see someone being killed in front of me, even before all the others despair I remain so indifferent that annoys even myself. I think I lost both the will to live, which already think everything that happens bad but this like a consolation prize. Maybe I think all and better than now. Maybe I'm so full of , I'm sorry if that is the case, and that my senses are already a bit dim with the feel of the recently used drugs.
Feeling that the drug has? I have heard this question many times ... It's not something I can explain, really. It's good. Escape from himself for a moment, not thinking clearly, simply get lost. It's good. It can be cowardly, but it's really unique.

But it was not what I was talking about, is not it?

Those days were passing in front of a flower shop, she was very striking and was especially decorated with various beautiful that day. I could not help admiring the roses that had there in so many