“Hey, Panda” I cough and play with the ball-pen, addressing the man on my right, breaking hours of uncomfortable silence in the recording studio. He turns to me abruptly. I’m only doing this for you Sandara.

      “Yeah, hyung?”

      “I,” I take a deep breath and close my eyes. Come on, Kwon Jiyong. It’s just one word, no actually it’s three but just say it and get it over with. So I just say it as fast as I can. “I’m sorry.

      His eyes widen, but a stupid grin starts taking place and I have to strain myself as to not to roll my eyes and snap at him. “For what exactly, hyung?”

      “You know what,” I grumble.

      He grins wider. “Is it because you’ve been a horrible hyung, or is it because you haven’t been treating me like a colleague? Or, is it because you’ve just realized you’re a narcissistic jerk who can’t get over his university hatred for people.”

      “I don’t hate you,” I scowl. “Just accept the apology, Panda.”

      “Hyung,” He drags his chair closer to mine, and I drag mine closer to the recording studio’s wall, the heat from his body unnerving me. “Calling me Panda is not nice.”

      “It’s not supposed to be.” I mumble, but he hears it anyways, and his grin widens.

      “I thought you wanted to apologize?” he wiggles his brows, and I give in to rolling my eyes.

      Instead of answering him, I scoff and turn my attention back to the lyrics on hand. “Just forget I said anything, Panda. You don’t even know how to record a song properly, can’t even follow a simple beat or get your notes straight. How do you expect to release an album in the following months, better yet, how did Hyun Suk hyung even accept you here?”

      “Yah, hyung,” he whines, the playful glint in his eye there, but not as strong as always. I squint and turn my body fully towards him. “I try very hard, and I’m a very good vocal, but…”

      He goes silent for a while and his eyes cast downwards and I frown. “But what?”

      “Frankly hyung, you scare me.” He mumbles, and that is the lowest register he has even spoken in since I met him in this God-forsaken record label, and my frown deepens.

      “What?” I shake my head and put down the lyric notebook onto the table, giving him my complete attention. I scare him? “That’s nonsense.”

      “Hyung,” he shakes his head slowly, and a sigh leaves him. This is the first time I’ve ever seen him this low, and something is squeezing my chest very uncomfortably. “The only thing I’ve ever wanted was for you to see me as a fellow artist, but, I guess I’ll always be the annoying Seungri from SNU.”

      “Pan-”

      “No, I get it hyung.” He shrugs, his fingers busy threading his shirt and I hate the suffocating clench in my chest. “I would have been annoyed by me too back then, I hate to think about it now, but it was my only way to cope.” He shrugs. “I joined YG because ever since I heard you and Yongbae hyung made it here, I realized I could do so much more than be a music teacher.

      “I’ve been trying for the debut for two years now, and when I got the confirmation from Hyun Suk sajangnim, I was more than excited.” He looks up at me with a small smile, and I gulp. “The idea of having you and Yongbae hyung here among many unfamiliar faces soothes me, hyung. Even if you can’t stand me, and you don’t think I’m worthy of debut, having you around helps me stay grounded, reminds me that I’m not the best.

      “Never have been, and never will be. So, it scares me a little.” He frowns, whispering the last part to himself, but the only noises in the room were the air conditioning and him talking, so I heard him well.

      I clench my fists, and swallow down the guilt in me. Yes, it was guilt. Oh, me.

      Coughing, I advert my eyes. “I never intended to make you feel that way, I don’t know what to say.”

      “Hyung, you really don’t have to say anything.” He pitches his voice back up with a grimace-like smile. “You’ve always been an to everyone, anyways. Why would it be different with me?”

      I gulp, and it’s my turn to cast my eyes away from him. “I guess I really am an .”

      “You are.”

      “Hey-”

      “Am I interrupting something?” A female voice comes from the door, and it’s Sandara. We were both so caught up in our conversation that we didn’t even notice her coming into the recording studio.

      “No,” We both answer at the same time, and the younger gets up from his swirly chair, his expression more lightened up than before. “I’ll get going, I have to meet someone.”

      “Is it that trainee?” Sandara teases him, closing the door behind her, and his face turns tomato red. “Someone’s been moving a bit too fast.”

      “Noona,” he scratches his head, “she’s a really sweet girl.”

      “I know,” she winks at him and he heads to the door, his face as red as I’ve ever seen him, and the guilt runs even deeper. I’ve been spending all the hours of the day with him for months now, how come I didn’t know he was seeing someone?

      When his hand touches the door knob, I call him. “Lee Seunghyun,” in seconds, he turns to look at me, shock all over his face. “I’m really sorry, about everything. Let’s catch up sometime, over coffee or something, okay?”

      “Um, Yeah,” he shakes his head, a grin taking over, “Yeah sure, anytime.” He turns again to leave, but hesitates and turns back again with a shy smile. “Do you know hyung? This is the longest conversation we’ve ever had. And,” he chuckles, “It’s the first time you ever call me by my name.”

      My face heats up and I cough, sniffing. “Just leave, Panda.”

      “Bye, Hyung. Bye, Noona.” With that, he leaves and I am left smiling.

      “That looks weird.” Sandara cuts me off, looking as amazing as ever in a simple jumpsuit with her shoulder length hair. I guess I looked as confused as I felt, for she elaborates. “It’s the first time I’ve seen you smile like that at anyone you work with.”

      “I smile at you,” I scoff, “Isn’t that enough?”

      “Don’t give me the attitude, Kwon.” She squints at me and I smirk.

      “Or what?

      “Or, no kisses.”

      The smirk widens within seconds, and I get off the chair, approaching her as she locks the door. “Now, why would you do that?” I wiggle my eyebrows, “You like it as much as I do.”

      “Jiyong, we agreed that the company is off-limits.”

      “Then,” I reach for her hand and intertwine our fingers together, “why did you lock the door?”

      She blushes, looking down. “I’ve missed you.”

      Biting my lips to hold a grin back, my heart beats faster and I drag her closer to me, and I connect our lips together in a sweet, calm kiss. She wraps her arms around my neck and returns it back, and just as it deepens, our need for air takes over.

      I smile and engulf her in a hug. “After Dolce Vita, I haven’t seen you thte whole weekend. What happened?”

      She grimaces and glances up at me, her eyes looking like a puppy’s as it asks for forgiveness. “Sorry, things came up with Seunghyun Oppa.”

      “Oh.” My grip on her loosens a bit, and it’s like a million needles were pierced right through me. Reality hits me now. Even if we were trying things out, she’s still engaged to Seunghyun. She isn’t officially mine.

      “It wasn’t anything serious,” she adds in panic, but how couldn’t it be serious? He’s her ing fiancé. “Jiyong, he just came back from a convention in Taiwan and had already prepared a dinner. I couldn’t deny him, and besides-”

      “its okay, Dara.” I take a deep breath and burry down the ugly thoughts, it’s better to enjoy the moment and not dwell on anything more. “No need to explain anything. I understand.”

      She raises her brow. “You do?”

      “Hey,” I forc