LIII

Separate Ways

Author’s POV:

Jungkook took a look at himself through his reflection on the window of their car as he waited for his cousin to round it. Youngbae did not wait for him though, because instead of notifying Jungkook that he will be going inside now, he just walked past the agitated male and straight to the gate, prompting the younger to just follow his lead.

As the taller of the two entered the yard, the first thing he noticed was that there were already lots of people – in fact, it seems like him and Youngbae were the only ones that are not there already. He also noticed the two older people that were not familiar to him, talking to their friends.

He then turned his gaze to the side, and there, he saw him.

When Jungkook saw Jimin the latter was with his cousin, Jin. But he did not pay too much attention to his cousin – his eyes were fixated on the shorter of the two. Jungkook felt his heart racing, picking up its pace to reach dangerous levels. His body ached to act – to move towards Jimin. Jungkook was aware of the sudden and unwanted change, but before anything happened, he forced himself to look away.

His change of focus was in time with Youngbae starting to walk towards the small crowd of people that had all of their eyes directed at the newcomers. The older was confident and friendly enough to immediately interact with everyone in the place, greeting the younger ones, as well the elders.

“Oh, you’re here!” Jin exclaimed as he approached the group with Jimin trailing behind him. “How are you guys?”

“We’re fine.” Youngbae answered. “We aren’t late, are we?”

“Nope, you’re not, hyung.” Answered Jimin this time.

“Jimin, son.” The older woman who was Jimin’s mother spoke. “Care to formally introduce us to these young men?”

“Oh, right.” Jimin nodded, walking between the two parties. “Eomma, appa, this is,” He paused, looking at the youngest person in the party. Jungkook visibly stiffened in his place when he felt Jimin’s gaze directed at him.

“This is Jungkook.” Jimin finally said. Another silence filled the air as Jimin wracked his brain for ways to introduce Jungkook to his parents, since really, he did not know where him and Jungkook stood. Everyone, except for Jimin’s parents, looked down on their feet in understanding, already feeling the tension and the air of awkwardness that always surrounded the once happy couple.

“My…” Everyone held their breaths. How do I even call him? Jimin thought. Maybe I should just go with the safest way…

“My friend.”  Jimin finally finished. His parents were oblivious to the way everyone let out a sigh of comfort. “Yeah… he’s… he’s my friend.”

“H-Hello.” Jungkook awkwardly bowed at the couple.

“This is Youngbae-hyung,” Jimin immediately followed, pulling the said male nearer. “He’s Jungkook’s cousin, and also a friend.”

“Nice to meet you.” Youngbae greeted them with a bow. Jimin then proceeded to introduce the older people as his parents.

When Jungkook learned who they were, his nervousness doubled. This is the first time that he will be meeting Jimin’s parents. At first, he did not understand why Jimin felt so nervous when Jungkook took him home to meet his parents more than three years ago. But now, even though he and Jimin are not dating anymore, he still felt very edgy.

Jungkook ached at the thought. I get to meet his parents when we’re nothing anymore… just… wow.

But judging from the way Jimin’s parents smiled at him, Jungkook thought that most likely, they do not know what happened between him and Jimin years ago.

“Now that everyone’s here,” Taehyung said, his grin not leaving his face. Jimin can see the discomfort in his expression. “Maybe we can start the party and eat?”

Everyone let out light-hearted laughs at Taehyung’s antics, including Jimin and Jungkook.

“Of course, of course!” Jimin answered. “You guys can start eating! I’ll just go inside to do something.” He said, motioning for everyone to take their seats to eat. Taehyung immediately headed to the grill and started his meat spree. Jimin, on the other hand, went back to his house to turn on the sound system.

“… I knew this would happen.” Jimin sighed in front of the console, staring at the space between it and his body. When he invited Jungkook to his despedida party, his mind was filled with doubt. He knew that no matter what he or his friends think, he and Jungkook were not in good terms yet.

Awkwardness is bound to happen.

Sighing one more time, Jimin his heels to go back to the party, but he was stopped in his tracks when he came face to face with the subject of his thoughts.

“Oh… J-Jungkook.” Jimin stuttered out, internally cursing at the way his behavior changed. He then decided that he needed to man up.

“H-Hi, hyung.” Jungkook answered. His eyes were fixed on Jimin’s, like they were having a staring contest against each other. He watched as Jimin quite calmly walked to where he was.

The older male stopped when he was already right in front of Jungkook, much his surprise. “It’s good you came.”

“Well… yeah.” Jungkook answered awkwardly. He was surprised at how collected Jimin seemed to be – like nothing happened. He’s just being civil, Jungkook. He thought to himself. And you should be civil, too. “I-I mean… It’s rude not to, right?” He added.

Jimin nodded in understanding, willing to push down the rising feeling of disappointment. “I see…” After that, another moment of silence floated in the air, which was broken by Jimin’s attempt to make things less awkward.

“Where are you going?” Jimin asked to Jungkook.

“Ah… right.” Jungkook answered, rubbing the back of his head. “I was looking for the CR.”

“Oh, it’s that way.” Jimin answered, pointing to the door of the comfort room near the living room. Jimin began to walk past Jungkook to he can go back to the comfort of having people around him when a voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Hyung.” Jungkook called, stopping Jimin from walking any further.

Said boy turned to face the younger. “Yeah?”

“Uhm… I…” Jungkook stammered without facing Jimin, not really knowing what else to say. He did not even know why he called Jimin’s name in the first place. He just felt like their conversation should not end just like that. They just started talking, and it was already over before Jungkook had the time to get used to it.

The feeling was familiar as hell, and Jungkook did not like it.

“I… I was just asking what time you’re leaving tomorrow.” Jungkook finally answered, thankful that his brain managed to spit out a fairly good excuse.

“Oh… right.” Jimin answered. Jungkook missed the way Jimin’s eyes turned sad with disappointment.

Come on, Jimin, he already made it clear to you, right? Jimin thought to himself. So why are you still hoping that he’d stop you? Can you not be stupid, even for the last time?

“My flight is scheduled at three in the morning.” Jimin answered. He waited for Jungkook to say something else, anything.

“Okay.” Jungkook answered. It was far from what Jimin had hoped he would say. He let out a silent sigh of resignation, but when he saw that Jungkook was already walking away, his thoughts wandered to Taehyung’s words to him.

“Jimin,” He said. “Don’t you think you can try for just one last time?”

Jungkook was already holding the knob the the door to the comfort room when he felt something cold wrap around his other arm, tugging him, provoking him to turn around. The sudden hold was surprising, but when he turned around and saw who it was, his heart started to beat erratically.

It has been some time since he felt Jimin hold him like this.

“H-Hyung…” Jungkook stuttered, looking at the hand that was tightly wrapped around his wrist.

“Jungkook…” Jimin said, his eyes fixed on Jungkook. “Kookie.”

The other man flinched at the nickname, making him snap his head up to meet Jimin’s gaze. That single word had Jungkook feeling different feelings all at once – feelings that he had not felt for more than three years.

Feelings that he last felt when he and Jimin were still together happily.

“Will we…” Jimin trailed off, trying to shake off the nervousness that he feels, as well as the hope that he knows would kill him if things do not turn out the way he wants them to. “Will we be alright?”

“W-What do you mean, hyung?” Jungkook asked, confused as to what Jimin was saying. “What are you – ”

“I’m sorry.” Jimin cut in before Jungkook could finish his question. He knew that Jungkook already knew what he was talking about. “At least… before I go…” Jimin continued, struggling to think of words that would relay what he really wanted to say.

He took a deep breath as he let go of Jungkook’s arm. “Since there’s no assurance if… if we’ll ever meet again in the future… I just thought that… we should have closure.”

Jimin looked at Jungkook and hoped to see at least a look of consent or agreement. To his relief, Jungkook gave him a nod, telling him to continue what he was saying.

“I already said this before, and… and I’m going to say this again.” Jimin started, already feeling his eyes prickle a bit. “I’m sorry. I-I know I shouldn’t have handled things on my own, and I know that I m-messed everything up for the two of us. But Jungkook,” He said. The said male let out a breath he did not know he was holding. “I never meant to hurt you. I did that to keep myself from hurting you more, had I realized that I still loved Taehyung.”

“I… I really don’t know what to say.” Jungkook answered, dropping his head, not daring to look at Jimin in the eye, knowing how exposed he was in the moment. He was afraid of what Jimin would see in his eyes. He was afraid to face how he really feels.

But deep inside, he knew that right now, Jimin is giving him that one last chance to feel love.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Jimin said, snapping Jungkook out of his thoughts. “I just… I just want to ask just one more time, Jungkook. Will you be okay if I leave?”

Just one word from you, Jungkook. Jimin thought hopefully, wishing that Jungkook would finally say what he was hoping to hear from him. Just one word and I’m willing to leave this all behind.

No. Somewhere inside Jungkook, in some place he had not been to in a very long time, something answered. But Jungkook could not. He already answered the same question before. What has changed?

A lot did change. But Jungkook just was not ready to acknowledge it.

“I already said it before, hyung.” Jungkook answered. “I’m happy that you’re reaching your dreams. I’m happy for you and your success, hyung.”

He briefly wondered why it hurt to say those words.

“You know, Jungkook.” Jimin said, taking another deep breath to ease the heavy feeling that washed over him. “You know I love you, right?

“I-I know.” Jungkook answered. “I also loved you, hyung. A-And it’s an experience I will treasure forever.” He continued, shattering every bit of hope Jimin still had in him until today. “I promise.”

At least I tried. Jimin thought as he nodded at Jungkook in understanding. At least god knows that I really, really tried.

Jimin walked closer to Jungkook, much to the surprise of the younger. The shorter did not know what he was doing, really, but as the distance between the two of them shrank, Jungkook’s heart began to pick up its pace. He just stood there, petrified as Jimin stopped right in front of him. He watched as the older closed his eyes and leaned forward, the distance between their faces getting even smaller.

All of a sudden, with heated cheeks and a racing heart, Jungkook wrapped his arms around Jimin and pulled him in for a hug, tilting his head just enough to not touch Jimin’s. He was not ready to kiss him, even though it was for a goodbye.

“G-Good luck, hyung.” Jungkook said before he quickly unwrapped his arms around Jimin, opening the comfort room door afterwards and entering it.

Jimin watched as the door closed before him. He smiled to himself sadly, wiping the tears that he had not noticed had fallen from his eyes a few moments ago. He knew that it would not be the last time that he will cry because of the younger, but he silently wished that it would not take too long for him to move on, if he ever will.

After fixing himself again, Jimin his heels and went out of the house to join everyone else outside.

Once he was back outside, Jimin joined his family who were beside the grill, cooking more meat for everyone and themselves. They sent him a smile as he approached and got a stick for himself. Somehow, he felt fulfilled. Even though Jungkook’s response was far from what he had hoped, the thought that he will not spend his entire life wondering and filled with what-ifs made him thank that he followed Taehyung’s advice.

With that thought in mind, Jimin took another stick of meat with him and approached his best friend, who was talking loudly with Namjoon with a total of six sticks of meat in his hands, all of which already having one or two bite marks.

“Hey, Tae.” Jimin called his name, making Taehyung look at him.

“Oh, Jiminie!!!” Taehyung exclaimed. “I love the food! The meat we prepared tastes amazing!!!”

“You love any food, Taehyung.” Namjoon chuckled, making Jimin laugh a bit and Taehyung glare at him.

“Hey! I don’t like ‘any food’!” Taehyung protested.

“Yah, yah, stop it already.” Jimin butted in, stopping Taehyung from whining any further. He then looked at Namjoon before saying, “Hyung, can you please give Tae and me a few moments?”

Namjoon gave Jimin a questioning look before nodding in consent, leaving the two on their own to approach Youngbae and Jin.

When the tallest person in the place was gone, Taehyung’s face immediately shifted to seriousness. “What is it, Jimin?”

“I followed your advice.” Jimin answered. Taehyung already prepared to take care of a crying Jimin, but to his surprise the shorter only gave him a small smile. “His decision stands.”

“Oh…” Taehyung answered, not really knowing how to react. “That’s… sad.”

“I know.” Jimin answered. “But you know… still. Thank you. Thank you because even though nothing changed… I got a closure.”

“Yeah… at least we tried.”

“Mmmm…” Jimin hummed in agreement. “I’m ready, Tae. I’m prepared for if I never get my happy ending in his lifetime. Because like what I said, if it’s not with him, then there’s not such thing as ‘happily ever after’ for me.”

“Hey, hey, don’t say that – ”

“You, however,” Jimin interrupted, stopping Taehyung from consoling him from the depressing thought he just voiced out. “Still can. You still can be happy.”

The confused look that Taehyung sent Jimin made the latter chuckle a bit. “What are you saying?”

“Come on, Tae, Jin-hyung is not like Jungkook.” Jimin answered, his eyes already trailing after the said elder. “They may be cousins, but Jin-hyung, being the more matured one, forgives people and admits his mistakes more easily. You can still get him, Tae.”

“Sh-Shut up you monster.” Taehyung mumbled, turning his back against his best friend in an attempt to hide his blushing cheeks.

“Aww come on, Tae, I followed your advice! It’s only fair that you follow mine!”

“No.”

“Jin-hyung!” Jimin suddenly yelled, catching both Taehyung, who was still discreetly fanning his heated face, and Jin, who was laughing with Youngbae somewhere a bit farther from them, off guard.

“YAH!” Taehyung protested, hitting Jimin’s shoulders. His action did nothing to stop him, though.

“What?” Jin asked as he approached the two, Youngbae trailing right behind him.

“Tae here has something to tell you.” Jimin giggled, pulling his friend forward.

“NO I DON’T YOU DWARF!”

Jimin ignored the insult, knowing full well that Taehyung only insulted him as a distraction. He then pushed Taehyung closer to Jin before grabbing Youngbae’s arm to drag him away from the two. When Youngbae asked him what was happening, all that Jimin answered was that “a beautiful relationship is about to continue.”

When it was just the two of them, Jin turned his full attention on Taehyung, who was just looking at the ground. Since he was not looking at the older, he missed the way Jin’s cheeks slightly turned pink, and his eyes softened.

“So…” Jin started rather awkwardly. “You have something to tell me… Taehyung?”

Ugh… that felt so forced… Jin and Taehyung thought at the same time. Taehyung braved facing Jin. His insides churned a bit at what he saw, because it has been some time since he last saw Jin look at him like that.

Taehyung quickly glanced at Jimin, and saw him looking at him expectantly. He let out a sigh hoping the release the butterflies in his stomach before he cleared his throat to speak.

“Can we…” Taehyung started, pausing to swallow one more time. “Can we speak somewhere else? Just… Just the two of us?”

Jungkook put his cupped palms under the cascading water from the faucet, and splashed the cold liquid onto his face after a few seconds. He then stared at his reflection on the mirror of Jimin’s bathroom, and was not able to stop himself from thinking about what just happened before he and Jimin separated.

We almost kissed. Jungkook thought, immediately feeling his cheeks burning again in embarrassment, prompting him to splash another handful of water onto his face. We almost kissed, had my brain functioned a second too late. The initial thought that he had in mind was that he was thankful he was able to avert it, but later on, he realized that he was also a bit disappointed.

But he would not admit it to himself just yet.

He knew he should have said something else. Jungkook knew that he was not able to say the things that he really wanted to say to the older, but he was also pretty sure that even if Jimin gives him another hour to think about his feelings and say them, he still would not be able to say anything that would make sense.

Because right now, nothing about his feelings is making sense. He feels like a mess.

“Oh well, it’s over now.” Jungkook said to himself fishing out his handkerchief from the back pocket of his pants. “There’s no point in overthinking things now, Jungkook.”

With that thought in mind, Jungkook walked out of the comfort room and rejoined everyone else in the yard.

Once he got out of house, he scanned the people around him. He saw Youngbae picking up a few barbeque sticks from the plate on the table. He was alone. Not far from him, Jungkook saw Jimin’s parents still beside the grill, cooking more meat on sticks. They were talking to each other, smiling all the time. Jungkook saw how happy they were together and slightly felt a bad feeling stir within him. They were just like his parents – despite being married for years, they look like they are still in love with each other.

He then took a look at the other people, who were in a single place. Jimin and Namjoon were talking animatedly to Hoseok and Yoongi, who were seated beside each other. Jungkook noticed their linked hands hanging leisurely between their bodies.

The bad feeling that Jungkook felt a while ago intensified at the sight.

He also noticed that both Taehyung and Jin were missing. Jungkook headed for his cousin, who was now eating the meat on one of the sticks, to ask him.

“Hyung.” Jungkook called his attention, taking a seat beside the older. “Where are Taehyung-hyung and Jin-hyung?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Youngbae answered. “They started talking to each other a while back when Jimin dragged me away from the two of them. After a while, when I took another glance at where I last saw them, they were gone.”

“Oh…”

“Do you want some?” Youngbae asked, holding up the sticks of meat that he got from the plate. Jungkook thankfully grabbed one that looked like grilled chicken to him.

Good thing there’s grilled chicken here. Jungkook thought. Maybe Jimin-hyung knew I loved chicken so he bought some?

The small gathering ended at around nine in the evening. Everyone prepared to leave except for Jimin’s parents, who are staying so someone could send Jimin off. As expected from the close friends, who have known each other for at least years, they all enveloped Jimin in a group hug, even Jungkook, who felt really uncomfortable doing so.

“We’ll really, really miss you, Jimin.” Namjoon said as he patted the said male’s hair. Jimin just beamed up at him, busy getting smothered by attention.

“Yeah, yeah, Jimin contact us every now and then, okay?” Hoseok followed, tears already running down his smiling face.

“Of course, I will, hyung.” Jimin answered. He then turned to Yoongi and smiled at him. “Hyung, take care of the studio, okay?”

“Of course you idiot.” Yoongi responded, his face betraying the sharp but endearing words. “Still help me with the dance routines, okay? Video call or something.”

Jimin nodded at him happily before he remembered something that he needed to give his friends. “Oh, oh, wait.” He said, scrambling to free himself from the mess of limbs the wrapped him. He reached for his pocket and pulled out a ring of keys, jiggling them in front of everyone.

“What’s that?” Hoseok asked amidst his tears.

“These,” Jimin answered, jiggling them again before starting to remove them from the ring. “Are the keys to my house. I’m giving this to you guys before I leave.

“I spent lots of time, money, effort and even tears to build this home. This place is like… like a part of me. And since I cannot take this with me to America, I’m entrusting this part of me to you guys. Take care of it like how you take care of me.

“And when you miss me, you can go here and just stay or something. Bath in my presence.” Jimin joked, making everyone else laugh. “But seriously though, I hope that through this, my absence wouldn’t be too much.”

“AWWWW JIMINIE!!!” Taehyung cooed, wrapping his arms around the shorter again in a bone crushing hug. “WE’LL MISS YOU EVEN WITH THIS HERE!”

“Don’t be cheesy, Tae.” Jimin answered. “It’s not like you did not leave me to go to Japan before.”

“That was different, pabo.” Taehyung answered. Jimin grabbed his hand and handed over one set of keys to Taehyung.

“Here you go.” Jimin said. “Take care of my home, okay?”

“Yup!”

One by one, Jimin handed over a set of key to each and every person in the party, save for his parents. They all received the gift with a smile, giving Jimin a tight hug in return. Even though Jimin and Youngbae were not that close to each other, the former still gave the latter a set of keys.

But when Jimin was about to give the last set to the last person, it was different. Jimin gave a nervous Jungkook a set of keys with a smile.

“Thank you, hyung.” Jungkook answered, forcing himself to return the smile that Jimin so sweetly gave to him. He was shocked when all of a sudden, instead of him hugging Jimin like the others, it was older that pulled him in for a warm hug.

Jungkook had to admit – it was comforting to hold Jimin like this even for the last time, so he let himself tighten his arms around him.

“Thank you, Jungkook.” Jimin whispered. He said it with so much sincerity that Jungkook felt like crying. “Thank you, and please be happy for me.”

Somehow, Jungkook knew Jimin was not just talking about any other kind of happiness. Deep inside, even though he did not want to assume, he knew that Jimin wanted him to find another person that would make him happy.

Someone that would do what Jimin had failed to.

For once, Jungkook wanted to say something that he knew. He wanted to tell Jimin that no, he made him happy. He wanted to say to him that he wishes him the same, that he hopes Jimin finds his happiness even though it is not with him, even though the mere thought of it hurts.

But before he had the chance to open his mouth, Jimin let go, and walked away from him.

“Bye, Jimin!” Hoseok waved goodbye as he and Yoongi walked to their car parked outside. Jungkook watched as Jimin, who was now beside his parents, waved back at Hoseok. He only moved from his spot when Youngbae called his attention.

Jimin stood at the gates of his house as he watched the last of the cars disappear from his line of sight, missing them already. He remembered the way Jungkook tightened his arms around him. Jimin wanted it to mean something, but he knew better than to expect once again. He wanted to believe in Taehyung’s and Jin’s words, but this time, he wanted to protect himself. Even though he knew how bad he was at protecting people, it is the least he can do for himself.

“Appa, eomma,” Jimin started, turning his back at the streets and facing his parents. “Let’s go get some sleep. We’re leaving quite early tomorrow.”

When Jungkook and Youngbae got home, both of them headed straight to their shared room and prepared for bed. The whole while that Jungkook was getting ready to sleep, his mind was filled of thoughts about Jimin and his broken relationship with him.

The night was cold. It was a favorable condition for a good night sleep, but for some reason, Jungkook just could not shut his mind down. He already tried listening to music to fall asleep, but it was useless. Reading stories on his phone during bedtime usually made his eyes heavy really fast, but it did not work.

He glanced to his side and saw Youngbae sleeping peacefully, soft snores flowing out of his nose. He envied the older. He might be single, but at least, he does not have to endure the struggles that Jungkook was having.

In an attempt to fall asleep again, Jungkook his side and closed his eyes again, and waited for sleep to claim him. After what felt like an hour for Jungkook, he again turned and changed his position to lie down on his stomach. And after a few minutes, it worked.

The peaceful, refreshing sleep that Jungkook was hoping for did not last. He started dreaming of Jimin and their moments together years ago, the way the elder’s eyes shone with love and adoration for him whenever their gazes met.

I missed them. Jungkook thought in his sleep, but even though it was just a dream, it all sent a pang of pain in his chest. It hurt, but if was a different kind of hurt this time.

It hurt too much that Jungkook was woken up from his dream. Almost immediately, he noticed how his pillow was wet.

“Hey, why are you still awake?” Youngbae asked with a groggy voice. He did not notice the way Jungkook palmed his wet cheeks to hide the tear tracks.

“I-I don’t know, hyung.” Jungkook answered. He was dead serious with his answer, but Youngbae shocked him when he heard a light chuckle as a response from the older.

“Of course you know why, Jungkook.” Youngbae said, catching the younger off guard. He looked down on the bed to hide his eyes from his hyung who learned how to read him so well.

“It’s Jimin, right?”

Jungkook lied on the bed motionlessly for a few moments, thinking about what his hyung said. After a while, he gave the older a small, but unmistakable nod.

“I-I just can’t get him out of my mind, hyung.” Jungkook ranted, running his hand through his hair in frustration. “No matter what I do, I can’t get myself to stop thinking about him. Even in my sleep he’s… he’s still there!”

Youngbae let out a calm sigh as he took a glance at the clock that read one in the morning, mentally noting that at least, Jungkook already got some sleep.

“Jimin’s probably awake right now, getting ready to leave.” The older of the two said, talking to no one in particular. He waited for a few seconds before he started talking to Jungkook again. “So, tell me, what did you and Jimin talk about last night?”

“H-How did you know?” Jungkook asked, bewildered as to how his cousin knew that Jimin and him talked during the party.

“The two of you took too long.” Youngbae answered. “And the sudden change in your moods was too too obvious to not notice.”

“I see…” Jungkook nodded in understanding. If his cousin noticed, everyone else probably did, too.

“We… We had closure.” Jungkook answered. “We talked about what happened to us and… and we wished each other luck. That’s all.”

Youngbae raised a brow at his cousin, making Jungkook shift uncomfortably in his position under the scrutinizing gaze of the shorter. He hated how much Youngbae had known him in the three years that they have lived together in Europe, but at the same time, he was thankful someone could understand him.

“So… what’s the matter, then?” Youngbae asked. Here come these questions again… Jungkook thought. He hated how difficult it was for him to answer questions as simple as that.

Youngbae, though, did not need an answer from the younger. “Maybe closure isn’t what you guys need?”

“I don’t get you, hyung.” Jungkook answered a bit too quickly, surprising both himself and his companion. “Y-You’re not making sense.”

“Well… maybe you guys don’t need a closure, but a new start.” Youngbae answered simply. He watched as emotions played across Jungkook’s young, but mature features, getting ready to support the younger whatever happens. He watched as a flash of understanding crossed Jungkook’s eyes.

And again, without waiting for an answer, he asked.

“Tell me, Jungkook. What’s stopping you from starting anew with him?”

All of a sudden, Jungkook broke down in front of him. The way Jungkook’s shoulders shook almost made Youngbae guilty, but he knew the younger needed it.

“I-I don’t know!” Jungkook sobbed out, closing his eyes in an attempt to stop the tears from flowing. “I’m so confused! I-I think I shouldn’t be with h-him… b-but every time we’re together I-I… I can’t…” He paused, struggling to say things out loud. “I can’t… I can’t help it… but I feel all happy and g-giddy inside… But I know it’s wr-wrong!”

Youngbae scooped the younger into his arms to hug him as Jungkook continued to cry.

“And j-just when I’m about to open up, m-my mind t-tells me not too… b-because it will just h-hurt me in the end. My mind keeps telling m-me that J-Jimin-hyung did not l-love me – t-that he will just hurt me… and leave me… and g-give up on me, j-just like what he did before.”

He took a deep breath. He was crying so hard it was hard for him to think properly, but somehow, he managed to say the things that he wanted to say.

With a hiccup, he tightened his hold on the older, and cried.

“Hyung… I’m so scared…” Jungkook finally admitted, even more sobs wracking his body as his walls broke down, all of sudden feeling so, so vulnerable, but free. “I-I’m so s-scared of loving again… a-and getting hurt!”

Youngbae rubbed the younger’s back in an attempt to comfort him. “Tell me, Jungkook.” He whispered calmly, urging the said boy to open up more. “Do you honestly think Jimin will hurt you again? Because if you’d ask me? I really don’t think so.

“I saw how sorry Jimin was after what happened. I felt how sincere he is in whatever it is that he is doing that involves you. Everyone hurts, Jungkook. You’re not the only one. And guess what?”

“J-Jimin-hyung…” Jungkook answered, his crying already quieting a bit. “He’s hurting, too.”

“Yeah…” The older smiled. “But trust me – hurting isn’t so bad when you’re with someone you love.”

Silence rang in the room after what Youngbae said. The only sounds that they heard were the humming of the night birds and occasional sniffs that Jungkook did. It was only broken when the said boy let out a light-hearted chuckle.

“Hyung,” Jungkook said, sniffing. “Where did you get all those stuff that you just said? I thought you’re single.”

“I’m already old, you poof. I’m nearly 30; of course I’ve had my experiences.” Youngbae remarked as he sat up from bed, getting ready to leave. “So, let’s go?”

Even though he did not know where to go, Jungkook still sat up. “To where, hyung?”

“Airport.” Youngbae answered. He took a look at the time on his phone before continuing to fix himself. “It’s forty minutes before three. We still have time.”

Jungkook stared at his hyung who was still busy fixing his hair. Even though he knew he can’t see him, Jungkook gave a nod as an answer, getting up from the bed as well to get ready.

The two made haste to the airport. The whole while that Jungkook was in the car, he could not help but keep wishing for one last chance to be with Jimin. After letting everything out in his room, Jungkook felt like he was a new person, or rather he felt like he was back to his old self. He was nervous, to say the least, because he realized that there is a big chance that Jimin is already gone, out of his grasps, all because he doubted their love for each other too much.

When they reached the port, Jungkook immediately ran into the building, nimbly avoiding everyone else that were also heading into it, probably getting to their flight as well. He went straight to the customer help desk.

“Good morning, sir.” The staff greeted Jungkook, oblivious to the younger’s reason for being in the place. “May I help you?”

“Three AM flight to America.” Jungkook said, panting. “I-I need to get in there.”

“Do you have your ticket, sir?” The personel asked. Jungkook only shook his head, unable to speak since he was out of breath. “I’m sorry sir, but we can’t let you in.”

“But – ”

“Stop it, Jungkook.” Youngbae interrupted, pulling Jungkook away from the counter. People are already starting to watch them. “We can’t just go in there if we’re not passengers.” He then turned to the staff and gave him a bow. “We’re so sorry for this.”

“It’s no problem, sir.” He answered. “But if you’re looking for someone booked at three in the morning, I’m sorry to say that he or she is probably already inside the plane.”

Even despite Jungkook’s protests, Youngbae ushered the younger to a place near the entrance to the runway to wait for Jimin. He reminded the younger that it was all that they could do aside from calling Jimin’s phone in hopes of him answering it.

But fate was not kind to them, for every time for the past ten times that Jungkook had tried to contact Jimin through his phone, his call went straight to the operator.

Jimin’s phone is already turned off.

“I’m too late…” Jungkook muttered, putting down his phone that read three in the morning. He could not stop the tears from flowing down his face again even as Youngbae led him out of the airport. He wondered if Jimin felt the same way when he left, but he figured that no, Jimin was probably more hurt than him back then, because they did not even say goodbye to each other.

“At least we tried, okay?” Youngbae said to console the younger, but he knew it was pointless to do so. He could only support Jungkook as they entered the car and started to drive back to their house.

As they drove away from the airport, Jungkook saw a plane fly past them. He knew he there was nothing he can do to stop Jimin now, so he simply bade him goodbye in his mind, and wished for him to be happy.

Two years later, Jungkook walked into his cousin’s café clad in large sweater and jeans. The place held so much memories, most important and the best of them all was the memory of the first day he and Jimin met. He looked over to the side, to a spot near the glass wall – the same spot where he and Jimin sat on that Friday afternoon when the café was too crowded that he had to share a table with a complete stranger.

The spot was deserted. He usually sat there every time he went to the café alone, every time he missed Jimin too much. But this time, though, he was not there to eat alone.

He took a glance to the counter, and saw Jin busily walking around the back, still in his pink apron. Jungkook could not stop a small smile from creeping up his face at the familiarity of it all.

“Jungkookie!!!” A loud yell made Jungkook’s thoughts stop along with his heart. He could feel everyone’s stare already curiosly looking for someone who would respond to such shameless call. Back at the kitchen, he can see Jin shaking his head in amusement.

Ugh… this guy… Jungkook sighed, slowly turning his head to face the traitor that just revealed his name to everyone in the café.

He saw Taehyung grinning shamelessly like there is no tomorrow, not caring about the stares, and even glares, that the other customers were giving him. Even though he knew that it would be bad for his reputation, Jungkook had no choice but to approach the older.

The two became close not too long after Jimin left. Taehyung felt like he had the responsibility of taking care of Jungkook because he was Jimin’s best friend. He jokingly claimed that he was Jimin’s incarnate in Korea, and that it only made sense if he would take care of Jungkook just like how Jimin would. Jungkook, on the other hand, only let his hyung take care of him, since Youngbae left him only a few weeks after Jimin’s departure.

Also, he could not hate Taehyung; he was really a kind, funny person to be with. And besides, he was like family to them now, courtesy of his relationship with Jin. The two of them started “getting to know each other”, as Jin put it, after the despedida party, and now, they are officially in a relationship.

“So, how’s my favorite dongsaeng?” Taehyung asked. Jungkook sent him and incredulous look before responding.

“Well, aside from that embarrassing moment when you shamelessly shouted my name in public, I’m fine.” He answered, feigning irritation.

“Aww… nothing wrong with your name, Jeon Jungkookie.” Taehyung answered. “Shall we order now?”

Jungkook only nodded at his hilarious hyung, who whipped out his phone and dramatically dialed a number. “Who are you calling, hyung?”

“Our waiter, of course.” Taehyung answered. “Hey, hyung, take our orders, please?” After saying those words, Taehyung waited for a second before emitting cringe-worthy kissy sounds at the phone.

“You’re disgusting.” Jungkook jokingly commented, face contorting at his hyung’s actions.

“Yeah, we’re disgustingly sweet.” Taehyung said. After a few moments, Taehyung’s smile got even wider as he stared behind Jungkook.

“Hello.” Jin greeted the two of them with a smile on his face. Jungkook smiled back at him, and proceeded to tease the older.

“What the hell, hyung, you’re letting yourself be a slave of Tae-hyung?”

“Nope.” Jin answered. “Not all the time. This is just in public, really. But when it’s just the two of us, I’m the boss. Right, Tae?” He ended, sending a wink to the younger, who began flushing from his cheeks down to his neck.

Jungkook easily understood. “EWWW STOP IT!” Jungkook groaned. “You guys are so gross!”

The three continued to talk to each other easily, with Jin staying longer for a while before taking their orders. Since he was still working, the oldest could not stay for too long with them. After a while, he eventually excused himself to take care of their food.

The two talked to each other about random things that crossed their minds. When Jin came back with their foods, Jungkook watched Taehyung plant a kiss on Jin’s cheeks, the two happily and lovingly smiling at each other.  Even though he felt a slight tinge of jealousy, Jungkook was still happy for the two of them.

“So…” Taehyung started. “Are you really going?”

Jungkook nodded at him as a response. “I’m a bit excited, actually. A bit excited and a bit nervous, but mostly excited.”

“Ooohhh… I see.” Taehyung smiled. “I’m really sorry, Jungkook. You really did not have to do this… only if Jimin let me give you his contact details.”

“Nah… it’s fine, hyung.” Jungkook answered. “Maybe we needed this break after all that drama that happened years ago. And besides,” Jungkook paused, taking a sip of his chocolate drink. “It’s about time I put effort into this.”

Taehyung only chuckled at him as a response.

“So, why did you want to meet?” Jungkook asked. “To ask me that?”

“Well… yeah.” Taehyung answered. “Also, since you’re not holding a party, I decided to spend more time with you.”

Jungkook smiled at Taehyung’s sincerity. He kind of felt bad, because he can already see that Taehyung will miss him, too, just like how he missed Jimin when said man left.

But really, really wanted to go, so he set the feeling aside.

“Sounds like a plan!” Jungkook said, standing up from the seat. “I’m not planning on spending the rest of the day here, you know. Let’s go somewhere!”

That night, after his road trip slash food trip with Taehyung, Jungkook went home – but not to his home with his parents. With the key that he had treasured with his life ever since that day, he opened Jimin’s house and went inside.

Three months into Jimin’s departure, Jungkook decided to leave his parents’ house to live on his own, and he decided to stay in Jimin’s house to take care of the said place. Everyday, he wakes up early in the morning to clean the whole house, even though he had work. It was among Jimin’s last requests before he left – for everyone to take care of his home in Korea.

And since all of them are really busy, sometimes, Jimin’s house was left unattended. That is why Jungkook decided to take the responsibility.

And besides, when his longing for the older became too much, Jungkook only had to open all the lights in the house. He studied every nook and cranny of Jimin’s home. Through this, he felt like he had gotten closer to Jimin even though he is oceans away. He felt like he learned more about Jimin.

Once he got inside, he started to clean the house again. It will probably be the last time he will do this, so he took his time to appreciate every spot. But when he came to the spot near the comfort room, Jungkook could not stop his tears from falling.

But before he broke down, Jungkook shook his head free of the depressing thoughts.

“Come on, Jungkook.” He scolded himself. “That’s all in the past now, right?”

After taking a few deep breaths, Jungkook continued with his work. Right after he finished cleaning the whole house, a car horn blared outside, prompting Jungkook to hurriedly rush out of the house to open the gate.

“How’s my son?” Jungkook’s eomma asked as she got out of the car, extending her arms to hug Jungkook. “You’re leaving us for good, huh?”

“It’s not like that, eomma.” Jungkook answered, smiling.

“I know.” She said. “I was just kidding. But you can’t blame us… you’re leaving tomorrow, of course we’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you and appa, too.” He responded. “Come on, let’s go inside. Did you bring dinner?”

“Well of course!” The woman answered. “We wouldn’t let you starve!”

“Okay, let’s go eat!”

The Jeon family ate their dinner together that night in Jimin’s house. Jungkook had them come over to send him off the next day. That night, they talked about everything that happened, and recalled their moments as a family over a box of pizza. They also recalled that time when Jungkook took Jimin to their house. Jungkook remembered that the elder had been so nervous back then.

His eomma also retold that time when Jimin went to their house looking for Jungkook, who just left for Europe. Jungkook wanted to cry at both sadness, because he felt pity for Jimin, and in happiness because he really found his father funny when he denied almost hitting Jimin back then.

The family went to sleep in one room that night even though Jungkook claimed it was too cheesy.

His parents sent him off the next day at the airport with tears in their eyes, but despite missing them already, he was far too excited. In fact, in his excitement, he was unable to get a good, deep sleep the night before.

He ended up sleeping in the plane with his coworkers.

Jungkook only woke up once their plane landed. Almost immediately, he felt his heart pick up its pace in excitement and nervousness. They stayed in a hotel for the mean time. The company was still finalizing their accommodation, so they had to stay in a temporary place.

Since they were in an English-speaking country, Jungkook did not dare going outside the hotel in fear of being lost and not being able to ask for help from people. He only stayed in his room in the hotel, only going out to the lobby to get a breath of fresh air.

He could not wait for the day end, because he knew that the next day, he will be meeting his new boss.

Jungkook woke up early the next day to fix himself. It will be his first day in his new workplace – he and his officemates back in Korea that also went with him to America are going to meet the head of the American branch of the company first thing in the morning.

Jungkook felt like it was back to day one, when he was so nervously fixing himself just to look as good as he can manage.

Even though he felt like his preparations were not enough, Jungkook had no choice but to leave for the company when the clock seven.

The whole drive to the company was filled with nervousness for Jungkook. His workmates, who are busily glancing around them, knew nothing of his concerns and he planned to keep it that way. So he endured his struggles on his own.

When they arrived at the building, Jungkook felt like he was going to faint. He still was not ready, but he waited too long for this to back out now. This time, he will make sure he will do it the right way.

When they entered the place, an American security guard opened the glass door for them. They were ushered straight to the top floor, boarding a whole elevator to get there. Despite wanting to remain as calm as he could be, Jungkook could not stop himself from jumping in place to ease his nerves.

Here it comes, Jungkook. He cheered himself up. You can do this. Nothing bad will happen.

Their group exited the elevator and walked to the end of the corridor, with only the sound of their shoes filling the hall. Everyone was silent, probably from wanting to exude professionalism, but Jungkook was silent for an entirely different reason.

“Are you guys ready?” The Korean staff asked, earning a nod from everyone in the group. She then entered the room, pushing the large, wooden doors of the office.

Here we go. Jungkook thought.

Once they were inside the room, Jungkook’s eyes widened. There he was, standing behind his desk.

He did not change. Jungkook thought. His shoulders relaxed at the sight of the person that he had wanted to see this whole time. He felt his heart fall at ease, and all the nervousness that he felt before was replaced with relief.

Relief because they are together again.

“Everyone, welcome.” Jimin said in straight Korean with the voice that Jungkook loved so much. He scanned the faces for anyone that he knew, but he did not expect to see him.

J-Jungkook? Jimin asked himself. He felt his eyes already starting to water, but there were other people in the room. So he recomposed himself and cleared his throat. “S-So… I’m Park Jimin, the head of this branch. And I decided to personally welcome you guys to America.”

The whole time that Jimin talked in front of them, Jungkook stood in awe. He was so happy to see him again, even though it was just like this.

Jimin took a few minutes to finish his welcoming remarks, but once he was done, he boldly said to in front of everyone.

“Jeon Jungkook,” He said with a stern, very professional voice. “Stay here. Everyone else, you can now go to your departments for your briefing.”

Everyone bowed to Jimin before filing out of the room. Jungkook kept his head low the whole time that everyone is leaving, rather feeling excited at getting to talk to Jimin again.

Once they were alone, Jimin sat down on his chair, looking at Jungkook with an unreadable look. “Jungkook.”

“Hyung.”

“Take a seat.” Jimin said with a serious voice. Jungkook bit his lips and followed his new boss’s order. Jungkook still did not have the courage to lift his gaze to meet Jimin’s. That was why he did not see Jimin whip out his handkerchief from his back pocket to wipe a stray tear that managed to escape his eye.

“So… why are you here?” Jimin finally asked.

Jungkook took a deep breath before answering. “I… I now work here.”

“I know that, stupid.” Jimin said, but his and Jungkook’s eyes widened when he realized how naturally the word slipped past his tongue.

Both of them blushed a bit at the awkward moment, and as expected from the more confident one, Jimin broke the silence that floated in the air.

“So… I was asking… how did you get here?”

“I quit my previous job to work in your company, hyung.” Jungkook answered. “I… I missed you so much I did everything to surround myself with everything about you. I managed to scale the ranks in your company, and when the offer to transfer here in your American branch came, I did not hesitate in taking it. So… here I am now.”

His lengthy answer was met with silence. It was so heavy for Jungkook, and it even made him doubt if Jimin was actually happy that he was here or not. After a few moments, Jungkook was not able to stand the silence anymore, so he lifted his head to look at Jimin.

When their gazes met, Jungkook’s throat dried at the way Jimin was looking at him.

He’s still the most beautiful being. The two thought towards each other.

“So…” Jungkook trailed off awkwardly, dying for Jimin to say something. The longer the older stayed silent, the stronger the bed feeling bubbling in his chest became.

“So… what?” Jimin asked with a very professional tone, making Jungkook feel even worse.

“Wh-What now?” Jungkook asked with a very hesitant tone.

“Hmmm…” Jimin hummed. He then turned his chair towards the glass window, turning his back on Jungkook, whose heart sank. “Go to your department now. Start with your briefing.”

Jungkook swallowed hard. He thought he will have another chance again if he follows Jimin to America, but apparently, it is not the case.

This is what I get for pushing him away too much before… Jungkook thought sadly. He thought he and Jimin can get together again, but apparently the only relationship that they can have for now is boss and employee one.

“O-Okay.” Jungkook answered, standing up from his seat. “Th-Thank you,sir.”

Oh come on, Jungkook, don’t cry. He thought to himself as he worked all of his muscles in the face to stop his tears from falling. Be professional.

Jimin heard the break in Jungkook’s voice. When he heard the younger’s black, leather shoes walking on the tiled floor, Jimin turned his chair again, and called his name.

“Kookie.”

Surprised at the old nickname, Jungkook froze on his way out of the office. He turned to face a grinning Jimin, the older’s words making his eyes tear up for an entirely different reason this time.

“Are you free for dinner later?” Jimin asked, his eyes that Jungkook could not read a while ago now speaking of longing. “I mean… We have quite some catching up to do.”

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT MY DEAR FRIENDS!!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR STAYING WITH ME UNTIL THE VERY END!!! And I shall say... I feel happy that I finished this story. And now I can rest.

So,.. Again guys, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! You guys are the best! I mean... come on... it took me over a year to finish this VERY VERY LONG story. And most of the time my writing isn't at its best but you guys were still here! And for that, I am really thankful.

So... this is goodbye, I guess. OF COURSE I ALMOST FORGOT #HAPPYVDAY huhuh my dear TaeTae T_T let's all wish his the best, okay?

So... again... happy holidays everyone! Merry Christmas to those who celebrate it, and HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS AND SAFE NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU!!!

Neliel3, signing out~