Sehun went back to his house the next morning. Tao wasn’t there. Sehun’s heart dropped a little. What was he thinking though? It’s been four days. How can Tao still stay here? He closed the door and look at that place he called house. Nothing changed from the last time. The photos still scattered everywhere.

He looked at the low table in front of his bed. His phone was there and there was a paper. A letter. He opened it and his heart die a little.

I don’t know when you’ll be back to read this, but I hope you did eventually. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for hurting you. I didn’t know that by me trying to have you back will cause you all of that hurt. Anyway, I’m saying goodbye here. Like how you want, I will disappear from your life. I’ll be back to China in few days. Goodbye forever, Hun ah. I’m sorry, I love you.

No! It can’t be. Tao can’t leave him again. How many days left since Tao wrote this letter? Did he go back already or not? Sehun was stupid but he won’t let Tao go this time. He pushed the power button of his phone, hoping to find that number Tao once called him with, but his phone was dead. He rummaged everywhere to find the charger but it was nowhere to be seen.

He was getting desperate and anxious. If Tao leave him this time, he’ll never see him again and he will live back to his life for the past three years. He can’t bear that life anymore. He was sure that his life will be ruined if that happened. And now he can’t blame anyone but himself. He was throwing his clothes out of his suitcase. Hope to find it there until the door of his house open and he immediately turned back and stood up just to see the one he wanted to find was there. Not the charger of course because the charger can’t be in a form of a human standing in front of him.

“Well, um.. Sorry to startled you. I knocked, I swear. You didn’t open it and I heard things being throw so I just came in. Sorry.”

Sehun didn’t answer and just stared blankly at Tao. He started to tremble and he was breathing heavily. All of the nauseas from having too less sleep and food on his system and the shocked from the letter all came to him at once.

“Suho hyung told me that you’ll be here, so I thought I should drop for awhile to give you back the key. I—I don’t need it anymore anyway.” Tao said and his eyes fixed to the opened letter. “Ah, you see the letter. Umm.. You know, I just think I have to tell you. I know it’s not important to you, but I just want you to know that you are free.” Tao stopped for awhile and continued when he got no response from Sehun. “I wanted to text you but you left your phone here, so I don’t know how to reach you. Well, actually I know one way as in Suho hyung, but I didn’t dare to meet him because I broke my promise to him. I made you cry. Again. And I bet the only thing he wants know is to chop off my head. He was literally shouted at me when he told me you are here. Look.. I just.. Umm.. I sorry if I was rambling, here is the key..”

Tao walked towards Sehun and handed him the key. Before Sehun can even take it, he fell down. He was hyperventilated. Fortunately, Tao was fast enough to catch him. Sehun was tired, too tired. His eyes were getting heavy and he let them closed and brought him to see nothing but darkness. He could faintly heard Tao’s voice, but his unconsciousness was fading bit by bit until he couldn’t feel it anymore.

Sehun opened his eyes. There was water, so much of it. He was drowned. He can’t breathe. He kicked his legs, but it’s no use. He looked around but there was nothing but water. He tried to swim but he couldn’t even reach the surface. He wanted to scream but the water kept going chocking him. He slowly lost his consciousness. He closed his eyes until the only thing he felt at last was something warm and wrapped around him.

Sehun opened his eyes again, but this time, he was at his house, on his bed. He looked around and recalled the thing that had happened before he fainted. He smiled a bitter smile to himself. I’m ruined. He sit up and leaning against his pillow on the wall with the blanket still covering half of him. He folded his knees, put his head on between, and hugged his legs. Tears started to drop and he sobbed quietly. It was so painful.

He didn’t actually know what to do. After getting all the encouragement from Suho and all, he still failed. That was the first time he really want to do something for himself, want to fix what he did, but he run out of time. There was no time for him to fix anything. And at last, he was still nothing but a failure. Sehun shot his head up when the door open.

“Oh, you are awake. Umm.. You know, I called Suho hyung and he said you haven’t really eat these past days so he told me to made you something to eat, but you know I can’t cook, so I hope you don’t mind some take-outs. Umm.. Listen.. Before you reject, I’m just going to put this all on the table.” Tao sat on the floor, pulled out the container one by one and placed it on the low table in front of the bed, he tried to explain again. “Uh.. I don’t know what you want eat, so I just bought what I knew you like to eat although I don’t know if you might still want to eat it after you know that I bought it because I thought you want to eat it and the fact that I am the one who bought it since I know now that you hate me, so I hope you like it and if you don’t I could perhaps buy—” Tao stopped when he looked at Sehun.

He was so beautiful. He was so pale but beautiful. He had tears on his cheeks and his eyes were a bit puffy but he was still so beautiful. Tao stared at him for two minutes and thought if he was becoming a masochist. But no. It was not the case. He stopped because Sehun was smiling. Oh Sehun was freaking smiled at him!

He was stunned when Sehun put out his blanket and walked towards him, or rather towards the table. Sehun sit on the floor in front of him. Sehun cleared his throat a bit and Tao spontaneously stood up. Sehun looked up at him worried, but Tao just walked to the so-called kitchen, grabbed a glass and poured some water on it. He brought it back to Sehun and reluctantly sat back on the place he occupied before.

“Thank you.” Sehun said in a hush voice.

Sehun opened a container and Tao helped him opened the other. There are jjampong, mandu, pickled radish and kimchi. Tao was going to retreat his hands after opening the last container but stopped when Sehun’s left hand grabbed his right hand. Sehun didn’t look at Tao and started to eat his jjampong with his other hand and that made Tao so confuse. And to make it worse, Sehun trapped Tao’s leg between his own under the table. He kept on eating like nothing happened. Tao tried to pull back his hand but Sehun held him tightly. Then something clicked on Tao’s head and he smiled.

“Sehun, don’t you think it’s easier to eat with both hands? You can’t hold up the container without your left hand.” Sehun stopped to eat for a while and thought about it then he let Tao’s hand off. “I don’t know if it’s because we both have long legs, but mine is a little bit trapped right now.” Sehun looked hesitant but he pulled back his legs.

He continued to stuff the food in his mouth and never looked up. He had plenty of foods on his mouth but he just kept shoving it in. After Tao told him that, he can’t help but felt a little bit gloomy inside. Tao attempted to stand up but Sehun quickly lean on the table and grabbed his hand. Sehun was looking up at him with wide eyes and both cheeks puff because of the foods.

“I’m just going to take another glass of water for you. Swallow down your food, you looks like chipmunk.” he grabbed the glass and poured water on it while Sehun

Sehun didn’t move his gaze. He looked at Tao and tried to chew and swallow at the same time. Tao walked back and put the glass on the table, but he didn’t sit back down. Sehun looked up confusedly at him. Is he going to leave again? That was what Sehun thought, but Tao proved him wrong. Instead, Tao walked to him and sit behind him, spreading his feet so Sehun was between his legs. Sehun straightened his back and going stiffed in a second.

“I don’t know if I think of the right thing, but if you want me to stay, I will.”

“S—Stay..” Sehun whispered slowly.

“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. As long as you want me, I’ll be here.” Tao moved his hands hesitantly. He circled his hands around Sehun’s waist, spooning him. He folded his legs and put it under Sehun’s legs. “Is it okay like this?”

“Okay. It’s okay.” Sehun started to relax and leaned on him.

“Good. Because I’m not willing to move. You don’t know how much I craved for this.” Tao said, resting his head on Sehun’s left shoulder. “Keep eating, you are too bony.”

Sehun grabbed his chopsticks and ate again. Tao was so happy to hug Sehun again. It was like dream come true. He thought that Sehun didn’t want him anymore. He was willing to give up already, but here he was. Hugging and spooning the one love he thought he lost. Tao was falling on his feels when he felt Sehun started to shake on his embrace. Then he realized that Sehun was stopped eating and sobbing. He loosened up his hug and turned Sehun a bit so he could see him.

“Hey, are you okay? Why are you crying? Did I do something again? Did this make you uncomfortable?” Sehun shook his head.

“I’m sorry.” Sehun said before Tao could say anything more. “I’m so sorry.” He looked at Tao’s eyes and Tao felt hurt.

“What are you sorry for? There is nothing to apologize.” He wiped the tears on Sehun’s cheeks.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t able to say it before. I love you and I’m sorry. Please don’t go away anymore.” Sehun cried harder.

“Please don’t cry. I’m here and it’s okay. I’m here. I won’t go anymore, I promise.”

Tao put one hand around Sehun’s body and one hand around his head, hugging him. Sehun circled his hand around Tao, putting his head on Tao’s neck and cried. It was so painful for Tao to see Sehun like this, but he was so happy too at the same time. Now he knew that his love isn’t one-sided. Now he knew Sehun loves him. Now he knew that this will be the beginning of them once again.

“I’m sorry.” Sehun said still sobbing in Tao’s neck.

“Stop apologizing, Sehun.” Tao Sehun’s hair

“But you didn’t say it.”

“Say what? I love you? You know I do. I really really love you, Sehun.”

“But you keep on calling me Sehun.”

“Isn’t it your name?” Sehun went stiff and didn’t reply. “I love you, Hun. Always.” Tao kissed Sehun’s nape and Sehun kissed Tao’s neck.

“Is it okay to kiss you?” Sehun asked after he pulled off a bit.

“No. You have tears and runny nose. I don’t want to taste that.”

Sehun grabbed the nearest tissue on his desk and wiped all of the tears and mucus off his face. He faced Tao and asked again.

“Is it okay now?” Tao chuckled a bit.

“Yes.” And Tao kissed him. “I actually don’t mind that though. I just want to tease and see how badly you want it.”

“You are gross.” Sehun smiled, grabbing Tao’s collar and deep in the kiss again.

They kept kissing. It started with some innocent kiss and it turned out hotter with opened mouth and tongue. Both of them didn’t seem to mind though. They abandoned the food and just kept on kissing, and hands started to roam everywhere in reach. Tao started to lower his kiss. Kissing Sehun’s jaw, neck, collarbones.

He kept on going because Sehun didn’t even resist for a bit but a little bit instead. Sehun grabbed Tao’s hand and put in to his back, inside of his shirt. Tao could feel Sehun’s and this made his halt his movement for awhile. He stopped the kiss and looked at Sehun.

“It’s okay. I want it. I want you. But of course, if you too want me.” Sehun bit his lower lip and looked down.

Tao didn’t answer it at all. Instead, he brought Sehun’s face with his other hand and kissed him deeply. His other hand still roaming Sehun’s . Soon, their clothes were scattering anywhere around. Both of them moved to the bed and made the love that they awaited for too long. Tao felt in heaven because the love of his life was finally his to love and felt. Sehun can’t thing anything but Tao. How Tao pleasure him like no one ever did. How he really willing to give anything to Tao. And how he finally being Tao’s.

I'm back guys~~

Well, this could be the end actually, but I have something more on my mind.

Please wait till I write it all..

And do tell me what you think~~

XOXO,

-pompom-