Thirteen

Just Smile and Make Believe (I don't feel a thing)

Kyuhyun’s family home, Mark learned just before the ceremony that would promote Kyuhyun to the head of his family, was located in South Korea, and was traditional in every sense of the word. Secluded up in the hills, and surrounded by the beauty of nature, Mark found the home to be extremely serene, architecturally gorgeous, and well worth the substantial trip to get there.

“You grew up here?” Mark asked Kyuhyun when the two o them were standing at the back of the house, looking out over the expansive property. Everything was green and almost glowing under the moonlight. “It’s really pretty.”

“My sister and I spent about half the year here,” Kyuhyun said, and when he stepped up next to Mark he was wearing a simple pair of jeans and a sweater. It was the most casual Mark had ever seen Kyuhyun, who was almost always dressed to impress.

But even Mark could tell something had changed when he and the others had arrived at Kyuhyun’s home. The ceremony was slated to take place the following night, but until then Mark knew he was merely a guest. And Kyuhyun was home. That meant different things to the both of them, but at least it was helping to ease the tension between them.

“You grew up on an estate around this size, if I’m not mistaken,” Kyuhyun pointed out.

Mark leaned on a support pole nearby. His ears caught the sound of childish laugher and Mark traced the noises to a couple of young children dashing across the lawn. There was a much older, watchful vampire accompanying them, but the children looked absolutely blissful and worry free.

It felt to Mark as if he’d never been like that himself.

“The main house was big,” Mark agreed, “but this is different.” He could feel something in the air. Kyuhyun’s house carried an air of mystery. Not to mention if Mark went exploring, he’d probably find deep valleys, running rivers, and all kinds of places to hike. The trees surrounding Mark’s old home had been more about protection. The woods around Kyuhyun’s didn’t feel that way at all.

Kyuhyun pointed a finger to the east and said, “My sister and I would make a game out of driving our parents crazy. The woods are a maze of mossy and uniform trees in that direction. Sound carries oddly, it’s easy to get lost, and my sister and I were never a fan of our bodyguards to begin with. We’d do our best to lose them day in and day out. Our parents fired all the ones that couldn’t keep track of us, and then eventually my parents, who were friends with Siwon’s parents, brought him over for a playdate or sorts. Siwon never lost my sister or I once. My parents trusted him more than the whole of their protection force, and that’s saying something.”

Ah, the subject of Siwon. No doubt the next few minutes would be awkward. But Mark was always curious.

“I knew the two of you were old friends, but I didn’t know how old.”

Kyuhyun’s head tilted in thought. “I was five when I met Siwon. I’m almost twenty-five now. We got along right from the start, we’re very similar people, and our dedicated friendship is likely what nearly led to our match. That and already my parents could tell that I would be headstrong. They knew I’d need someone who could stand up to my bluntness and how determined I can be.”

Mark felt that way about his own match, oddly enough.

“But your parents decided to go with Grace instead,” Mark said. He knew the story well now.

“Because of my sister,” Kyuhyun supplied, and that was unexpected. He turned to Mark and said, “All these years Siwon’s held animosity towards Grace, when really it should have been directed at my sister. She was a brilliant, absolutely magnificent violinist. She was more than accomplished or talented, she was a prodigy. And she loved music more than anything else. She loved her music more than her match, more than her family, and more than her responsibilities. She carried herself dutifully, and acted every bit the heir she was, but inside her we all knew what her true desire was. My parents worried she’d choose her music over the family one day. So they invested in me, which led them to Grace, and left Siwon by the wayside.

Mark asked, “Your sister was older than you by how much?”

“Thirteen years,” Kyuhyun said. “And that was more than enough to see the signs for what they were. It gave my parents enough to arrange my match to Grace to cover themselves if my sister decided to abandon everything she’d been trained for.”

“Hey,” Mark said, feeling a bit startled. “Grace was always going to be head of the family eventually. She was the undisputed heir. But if your parents suspected your sister my step down … they had to know that they were potentially creating a power vacuum.”

The kids further out shrieked loudly and Mark’s chest tightened in fear for a second before he realized they were good shrieks.

Oversensitive, Mark told himself. He was too oversensitive now.

Kyuhyun laughed. “They knew. It was a strategic power move. Mark, ninety percent of what a vampire does is a power move of some sort. You should be understanding this by now. Vampires covet many things, but most often we desire power above all other things.”

“Yeah,” Mark agreed lowly.

“But,” Kyuhyun said softly, “my sister never stepped down to everyone’s surprise. She continued her courtship with her match. She fulfilled her obligations. She went to that meeting because she knew it was required of her, and she had her life snatched because of her dedication.”

“Does it hurt to think about her?” Mark asked. It was a horrible thing that bonded them, the mutual loss of a sister.

“Does it hurt to think of Grace or Tammy? What about your younger brother?”

Mark admitted, “Some days less than others. Some days more.”

“It’ll never go away completely,” Kyuhyun warned.

No, Mark didn’t think so.

“Come with me,” Kyuhyun said, surprising Mark. “I’d like to show you something.”

Kyuhyun led Mark through the huge house effortlessly. They passed groups of vampires, most of which Mark didn’t know, and only then was Mark able to comprehend what a full house they’d have.

“Where are you two going?” Henry asked when Mark and Kyuhyun cut in front of him. Henry was headed towards the stairs with an easy smile. Mark, for all the twisting emotions inside him, so was very happy to see Henry after his absence.

“We’ll be down momentarily,” Kyuhyun assured in a breezy way, then beckoned Mark to follow him once more.

Kyuhyun stopped them in front of a door at the end of the hall on the second floor. And from his pocket he retrieved a long, brass looking key that fit into a decidedly western looking lock on the door. It was the only thing out of place in the home at all.

“This,” Kyuhyun said, fitting the key into the lock. “is the music room. My sister used it predominately, but I played piano to accompany her violin from time to time. It hasn’t been used since her death. I doubt it’ll be less than a decade before it’s used again.”

Kyuhyun hit the light switch as they entered and Mark could see all the evidence in the world that it was a music room. There were selves of sheet music and music book against the far wall, a piano adjacent to that. And in the far corner, next to the large bay windows, was a cherry wood violin on display.

Mark ghosted forward, asking, “Why are we here?”

“I think,” Kyuhyun said, switching on a nearby light and moving to a small table near the violin with a series of framed pictures perched on top, “I might have something for you. If I can find it.”

Mark looked about the room once more as Kyuhyun shuffled through the pictures. The room reminded him of the family gatherings his parents used to have in a mandatory way once a week during the summer. When everyone was away at school or work, it was impossible. But during the summer, they all spent at least one full night together, and often they’d spend at least a portion of that time in their own music room. Most of Mark’s family members had played an instrument of some kind. Mark’s father had been teaching him the guitar.

Over his shoulder, Kyuhyun called out, “Do you have many photographs of your family?”

“A couple,” Mark said absently. “Some of Grace and Tammy and Joey’s friends sent me facebook pictures they had stored on their accounts. And my uncle had a couple, but he never cared for photographs. I think there are some pictures at a couple of my parent’s vacation homes, but almost everything went down with the house.”

“I’ve been meaning to give this to you,” Kyuhyun said, turning back around. “I hadn’t been home to retrieve it until now.”

Kyuhyun handed him one of the photographs.

“When was this?” Mark asked, holding the picture frame in trembling hands. It was a picture he’d never seen before, but that part wasn’t important.

“Grace said it was taken on your trip to the Mediterranean last year.”

Mark pulled the picture closer, treasuring it.

Grace and Tammy were in the foreground, Grace holding the camera in front of them while Tammy made a kissing face. And it was just the perfect angle, because in the background Mark’s own form was visible, standing shoulder to shoulder with Joey while the two of them fished from the sea. And even more perfectly, just slightly in frame, were Mark’s parents, locked in a loving embrace while the light of the moon made them seem timeless and young.

Mark looked to Kyuhyun, tears in his eyes. “Why do you have a picture like this?” He felt stupid for asking. It didn’t matter why Kyuhyun had it. All that mattered was that Mark was probably holding in his hand the last existing photograph of all six members of his family.

“It’s foolish, really,” Kyuhyun said.

Mark hugged the photograph to his chest, feeling overwhelmed. And then ashamed. It was only now that he was realizing the features of his parent’s faces, the way Joey had styled his hair, and even smaller things about Tammy and Grace, had started to fade from his mind. The fire hadn’t happened all that long ago, and already he was forgetting.

“Grace sent that photo to me with several others. There was nothing particularly special about the photos themselves, but this one …” Kyuhyun blew out an ungentlemanly breath of air. “That’s the first photo I ever saw of her wearing the bracelets we exchanged. The sentimentality urged me to keep it.”

Kyuhyun was right. Just visible on Grace’s wrist was the bracelet that she’d worn after officially accepting Kyuhyun as her match. She’d always been promised to him, almost since birth. But the bracelet was more like a binding contract. Vampires didn’t put on their match bracelets unless they full intended to marry their match, and understood that backing out wasn’t an option.

Kyuhyun urged, “Take it back with you, Mark. Put it somewhere you can see every day, so that you’re reminded of the good every time the hurt chips away at you.”

“You’re giving this to me?” Mark could barely believe it. Kyuhyun had loved Grace very much. It couldn’t be anything small to give up the picture.

“I have a digital copy of that picture somewhere,” Kyuhyun assured. Then he stepped to the side and Mark could see for the first time that at least half the photos on the table were of Grace and Kyuhyun. “That is for you, Mark. And I’ll send you all the other photos I have on my laptop of Grace. She often forwarded me pictures of herself and other members of your family. You may be interested in them. It may take a while, but it’s entirely possible for you to build up a collection of photographs again.”

“Thank you,” Mark said, voice cracking. “Thank you, Kyuhyun.”

Kyuhyun made his way his way to the piano bench and sat on it wearily. “Of course, Mark. Of course.”

Kyuhyun was tapping out a quiet pattern on the piano when Mark told him softly, “You know things are different between us now, right? You know we can’t be the same now that you’ve made your accusation.”

Kyuhyun’s eyes didn’t rise from the keys of the piano. “I think that’s up to you, Mark.”

“Things feel different.”

The tempo of whatever Kyuhyun was playing picked up, though not loudly, and after a moment more, Kyuhyun said, “I think what you fail to realize is that I still, despite her passing, love Grace more than I care about your feelings. You can feel free to dislike me, or perhaps hate me eventually, and it won’t matter in the least to me. All I care about is keeping you, Grace’s only surviving sibling, alive.”

Mark took a tentative seat next to Kyuhyun on the piano bench and sighed deeply. More than ever he didn’t know what to think.

For the first night, the night before the ceremony, there was little for Mark to do. Kyuhyun disappeared hours after presenting Mark with the picture, and wasn’t seen again until the next night. That left Mark in the company of Henry and Zhou Mi and more vampire children than he could remember seeing in a long time.

“It’s only unsettling at first,” Zhou Mi promised him when Mark confided his feelings. “You’ll get used to them.”

Mark had a lot of second and third cousins, dozens of them even, but with vampire fertility rates so low, most of them were older. Traditionally young vampires were kept sheltered away, heavily protected and not amassed in such large numbers.

“It’s dangerous to have so many of them in one place,” Mark said fretfully, thinking of the humans who’s managed to take out fully grown vampire guards and even stronger purebloods. Children would be nothing but easy pickings.

Zhou Mi shrugged. “Kyuhyun’s father has been gathering the vampire children in the area for some time now. He’s called back all of his security, and it’s my belief he’s intending to protect these children from the human threat at all cost. Some vampires value things other than power, Mark.”

Mark guessed that was the other ten percent Kyuhyun had been talking about.

“It’s true,” Henry said, watching the same sight as Mark. There was an odd wetness to his eyes. “And I’d never trust a vampire who didn’t think our children are the most important thing in the world.”

More unpredictable than the number of children at the sprawling estate, was how easily Zhou mi interacted with them. Mark saw the progression of Zhou Mi’s interaction with them over the course of several hours. He indulged their endless questions, let them climb all over him when they were astounded by his height, and had boundless energy to chase them around.

Zhou Mi was very good with the children. It made Mark wonder if he was used to children, or if he was simply natural with them.

In any case, Mark could see quite clearly that Zhou Mi was father material. He was the kind of man who’d excel at being a father, and love every second of it, too.

And that was a very, very attractive notion towards the kind of future Mark eventually wanted to have.

If Mark had thought there were a lot of people at Kyuhyun’ home the night before the ceremony, the night of, saw an inane amount of new arrivals. Kyuhyun’s home had dozens and dozens of rooms, but within a few hours of the arrivals they were all filled to capacity, and even Mark ended up rooming with Henry and Zhou Mi so the more elder members of their council and community would have beds to rest in.

The ceremony itself hardly lived up to Mark’s expectations, but that was a good thing. It was fairly simply, taking place in the home’s largest room, hundreds of influential and important vampires packed into the space while the entire matter was presided over by Kyuhyun’s grandmother and previous head of family.

Kyuhyun’s father look the same as he had the last time Mark had seen him, at his previous meeting with the council. He was still a worn looking man, obviously in the middle of grieving from his loss, and barely concealing his frailty. He took Kyuhyun’s hands in his own as the event proceeded and, and after a few spoken words, in particular an oath from Kyuhyun, they were done.

“That’s it?” Mark asked Henry quietly when the group was dispatching for the after party and mingling in a way that Mark wanted no part in.

Henry delivered to Mark’s hands a glass of warm, fresh blood, which seemed more of an indulgence now than ever.

With each passing moment, Mark was feeling even more confident that his cousin was not to be doubted. Henry looked at him with the utmost affection, hugged him without a hint of guilt, and spoke so easily to him that there was no way Henry had done anything to hurt him or their family.

“What were you expecting?” Henry asked with a laugh, an easy arm slung around Mark’s shoulders like always. “I know those old farts like their pomp and circumstance, but considering Kyuhyun just elevated himself to a position of danger, they’re not really looking to make a big deal of it. Especially considering the circumstances surrounding Kyuhyun taking his father’s place. Yours will be different.”

“Can I have the short ceremony? I want that one.”

He wanted to ask Henry where he’d gone, and why he’d taken Amber with him. He wanted to know why Zhou Mi had been privy to the information, but not Henry’s own cousin.

But he didn’t. Because he trusted Henry, and he had faith that Henry would tell him when he was ready.”

Henry laughed again and said, “Sorry. No can do. Yours has to be something special. You’re an heir, Mark, and introductions are meant to show young purebloods off. It’s our very own debutant tradition.”

“Hardy-har.” Mark’s eyes drifted to Zhou Mi who absolutely had to be listening to their conversation, and said, “I don’t need to be shown off. I’ve already been matched.”

Zhou Mi perked visibly.

Henry looked absolutely gleeful.

“I just mean,” Mark tried, but only ended up sighing. “This introduction is going to be a long, boring thing, isn’t it?” Mark had been too young to attend Grace’s, and Tammy hadn’t wanted either of her too noisy, too embarrassing brothers at hers. Henry’s Mark barely remembered, especially after two glasses of stolen champagne. And Amber’s had been a direct family only affair.

Mark didn’t actually know what to expect.

“Long and boring,” Henry confirmed with a grimace. “But I’m here for you, cousin. We can suffer together. And hey, if it makes you feel better, we can force Zhou Mi to suffer with us.”

Zhou Mi said, a small grin on his face, “Misery loves company?”

Henry said sneakily, “More like Zhou Mi loves Mark.”

“Henry!” Mark snapped.

“Relax,” Henry said. Then he looked quizzical and pondered, “You still remember those dance lessons we had to take when we were kids, right?”

Warily, Mark asked, “Why?”

“Because,” Zhou Mi interjected with a bigger smile than before. “It’s tradition for the recently introduced to dance the first of the night with his or her chosen partner. And that means me, because we’re matched.”

“Dance,” Mark said glumly.

“Dance,” Zhou Mi repeated, less so.

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ROLEMODEL #1
THIS IS AMAZING ^^
littlelamb86 #2
Chapter 24: Your writing is always so realistic in the characters feelings n actions....no instant boom fall in love happily after......keeps me on my toes and I can't wait for the sequel.....I'm kinda rooting for zhou mi though as much as I like Jackson.......keep up the good work
hime-chan #3
I reread this gem instead of studying... How on Earth has this fic not gotten featured yet?
jaecomponents
#4
it's not because i finished this whole thing in, like, three days
no
how could u think that

i feel really shallow and biased for saying this but i came for the henber and stayed for the markson and this is no lie one of the best - if not THE best - fic i have ever read. like, ever. holy in dude
/DUDE/

i think i kinda lowkey fell in love with you and your writing around chapter 5 but now it's chapter 24 and i'm a mess
if i could do something greater than upvoting your story, you bet i would

aaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Zico01 #5
Chapter 24: That Was Perfect The plot twist the whole Mark starting to have feelings for Zhoumi got damn I loved it *claps*
darkdeath96
#6
I've actually stumbled on this on your other account in ao3 but I didn't have an account there but I'm glad I found your work here... Let me tell you I got hooked the second I started to read this.. Like I stated in a different story of yours it is hard to find really good reads these days and this one got be so hooked I spent hours in bed not moving just to finish it. I may have pushed away my studying time for this but it was worth it. I am looking forward to the sequel, because of the fact that one THIS MUST NEVER END and two that cliff hanger is killing me. Author-shii you truly are a Genius.
claire_yj #7
Chapter 24: This story is intense but absolutely superb. You had me hooked to it whole day. I must say you are my new favourite author. ♡

I'm usually confined to reading yunjae fics only. But your fantastic story about yunjae in space had me thirsting for more. That's what brought me here and I'm absolutely thrilled that I did. I'm now more open to fics with other pairings, thanks to you.

I felt a lot for zhoumi's character. He is such a loyal and loving character I totally fell for him. And I'm rooting for his match to work. You wrote his part so romantically you had me swooning and daydreaming. Haha

Once again, thank you for sharing your fics with us. And I'll be cheering for the sequel. ♡
Totomatoes #8
Chapter 24: I'm not one for politics or power-hungry aristocrats and definitely not one to delve into topics like war (although I like learning about them hahaha) but reading fanfics like this hype me up!

I love that I can for markson but ended up questioning our current political status hahaha.

I loved every part of it. What I hated? Markson. Absolutely tried to weasel my way out of hoping for Markson but I just kept holding unto my markson feels and not get completely satisfied but I assure you it's not bad!! In fact, it's great!! I love the fact that I didn't pick who I want Mark to end up with because I considered things I never thought I would. Like emotion wise it would be Jackson because I felt like he's someone that gives Mark a sense of normality in the middle of all the work of a prince and head of his house however, Zhoumi would be more suitable in terms of well... what he's up against. Not only is Zhoumi knowledgeable about the inner workings of the families, the council, the vamp-human treaties, he has connections as well.

I ALSO HATE THAT IT'S A CLIFFHANGER AND IT'S MAKING ME SO FRUSTRATED BECAUSE I WANT MOOOOOOORE.

But in all seriousness, I loved it. Loved every part. Loved every conspiracy. (I actually thought at one point that Kyuhyun might be the weasel lol). Loved every internal conflict Mark had. And absolutely loved his confusion over his emotions hehehe.

Fanfics like this make me giddy. I can't deny I'm a er for the occassional fluff and angst and romance, but themes like this catch my eye and definitely get me caught in the trap. Not only is the plot entertaining and interesting but the vocabulary is wonderful as well! It didn't use too complex words but didn't make it too simple either and even if you did, it was appropriate for the character and situation!

p.s. I got excited when Sooyoung and Taekwoon got involved.

p.p.s I kinda hoped that Taekwoon's match was Hakyeon lmao XD
orange_marmalady #9
Chapter 24: Hands down, best vampire au fan fiction I've ever read. Everything was so well thought out and I could really feel everything mark was going through. I really hope he chooses Jackson btw (^.^) guess I'm just a er for markson hehe. I hope you make a sequel, but even if you don't, I understand. Thank you for such an amazing story :,,,)