Chapter 3

Jongdae didn’t come to Baekhyun in the morning. For a while Baekhyun wondered if he had dreamed the sight of Jongdae drinking a maid’s blood, but Jongdae’s absence seemed to disprove that. Baekhyun sat on his bed, clutching the rose necklace. He didn’t know what to think. How could the man who had held him and kissed him so gently be the same monster with blood dripping from his teeth? Jongdae had kissed his neck…Baekhyun thought of those teeth near his neck and…

But the maid didn’t look like she was in pain. She looked like she was in…ecstasy. Baekhyun had only caught a glimpse of her face, but he eyes hadn’t been blank anymore. They’d been wide, unfocused, but bright and almost feverish. And she’d been smiling. So…was she hurt? Baekhyun wondered what she’d felt. He wondered if she was alive to answer.

But Jongdae wasn’t a monster…he couldn’t have been. He’d never been anything but kind and gentle, how could he kill a young girl like that? It couldn’t be. But Baekhyun had seen the blood, and Jongdae had never said anything to him about being a…a Vampire.

But that had to be what he was. Baekhyun thought they were just ghost stories, but clearly he was wrong.

“Master Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun jumped. Seulgi bowed. “My apologies, sir. It’s time for your injection.”

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes at the needle. He pursed his lips. Then he said, “Go to Jongdae and tell him that the only way I’ll accept my injections from now on, is if he gives them to me.”

Seulgi looked shocked. “Master Baekhyun, are you—”

“Not a request,” Baekhyun said tersely. She left.

He paced the room, glancing at the clock every two minutes. He forced himself not to lose hope that Jongdae would come. Jongdae had confessed only twelve hours ago to caring deeply for Baekhyun, surely he wouldn’t abandon those feelings so quickly. It was almost an hour before there was a knock at the door, and Jongdae entered.

In a flash, Baekhyun realized that he had lost hope for a while. He hadn’t known what to expect, but Jongdae was here. He was here, and he looked no different than he had last night on the couch. Baekhyun wondered if he had dreamed the whole thing.

Jongdae cleared his throat. “So, you’re refusing your injections unless I give them to you.”

Baekhyun crossed the room and punched Jongdae square in the jaw. Jongdae staggered, and Baekhyun clutched his hand and wondered if he’s punched a man or a brick wall.

“Ouch,” the two of them said together.

Jongdae looked at Baekhyun, his eyes tired. “I suppose I deserved that.”

“You deserved a lot more,” Baekhyun snarled. “What else are you hiding from me?”

Jongdae flinched. “Would you have believed me if I told you?”

“If you had shown me I would have,” Baekhyun fired back. “You might have told me before you confessed to caring so much for me.”

“I do care for you,” Jongdae said. “I never wanted to hurt you, and…and I didn’t want you to think of me as a monster.”

Baekhyun groaned and rubbed his forehead. “Oh, this is so much to take in! Jongdae, just be honest with me, are you a Vampire?”

“Yes,” Jongdae whispered.

Baekhyun sat in his armchair, feeling lightheaded. “How…long have you been a Vampire?”

Jongdae’s voice was barely more than a whisper. “One hundred and seventy three years.”

Baekhyun was beyond stunned, but he had one more very important question to ask. “The maid from last night, is she alright?”

Jongdae took a deep breath. “She’s tired today, but alive. I confess that I wasn’t as…careful as I usually am. I took more blood than I should have, but not nearly enough to kill her. She thinks she has a cold, she’s recovering.”

Baekhyun gave himself a few minutes to think. Then he said, “I don’t think of you as a monster.”

Jongdae gasped. “You…don’t?”

Baekhyun shook his head. “I don’t think a monster would behave like you. But let’s be very, very clear,” he said more firmly, “I’m angry with you, and a little afraid. Not angry enough to…to hate you, and not afraid enough to run, and…and I don’t regret kissing you last night. But if you ever want to kiss me again, then you’re going to have to start telling me things and they better be the truth.”

Jongdae looked torn between frustration and tears. “Baekhyun, I would love to tell you everything, but I’m afraid, too.”

That made Baekhyun pause. “You are?”

“Do you think I managed to keep my secret for so long because I gave everything away? I would very much like to go on living, I can’t do that if you leave here and spill all my secrets to everyone.”

That made Baekhyun upset. “What kind of man do you think I am?”

“I think you’re a very honorable man,” Jongdae said. “But fear can make people do dishonorable things. I don’t want to scare you, that’s the last thing on my mind. And you know, there are people who want nothing more than to kill things like me, and they’ll do anything to do it. They might hurt you to get to me.”

Baekhyun glared at Jongdae. “You’re not a thing. You’re a person. And this isn’t some silly horror-novel, I won’t sit here and listen to you babble about what a hideous creature of the night you are, for god’s sake pull yourself together and act like a man of your standing!”

He kind of shocked himself with his words, but he didn’t think them any less true. And Jongdae slowly began to smile.

“Alright, I will spare you my speech about my self-loathing.”

“Good,” Baekhyun said. “You can give me my injection now.” He stood up, and Jongdae gave him a puzzled look. Baekhyun pointed at the armchair. “SIT!”

Jongdae obeyed, and Baekhyun fell into his lap at once and hugged him tightly. He remembered how Jongdae’s teeth had looked covered in blood, and his heart began to race, but he stubbornly clung on. “You’re the first person who’s ever given a damn about me, and what I really want. I don’t want to lose you and I don’t want to betray you, and I certainly don’t want you to be alone.”

Jongdae held Baekhyun carefully, but lovingly. “Thank you. I don’t want you to be alone, either.”

Jongdae gave Baekhyun his injection, showing the same kindness he had before. When it was done, Baekhyun refused to allow Jongdae to stand.

“Start talking.”

Jongdae sighed. “Where should I start?”

Baekhyun shrugged. “When you became a Vampire?”

Jongdae nodded. “Well, as I said it was over one hundred years ago. I was already a Lord, and had been for some time. I wasn’t lying when I said my parents had died when I was young, but obviously it was some time before I was ready to accept the responsibility of my title. I was twenty two when I went to the capitol to see how our factories were doing, and on my first night I went out alone and got lost. It was then that I was attacked by a rogue Vampire, one who had been driven mad by bloodlust. I don’t know if it was a man or a woman, but whichever it was, it overpowered me easily and nearly killed me. I was saved by…”

“Yes?” Baekhyun prompted.

“By a wizard,” Jongdae finished.

Baekhyun closed his eyes and sighed deeply. “Of course you were. Go on.”

Jongdae smiled. “His name was Kyungsoo, and he was the one who killed the rogue and saved me. Since I had been drained so much I was nearly dying, and I begged Kyungsoo to save me. He took the rogue’s corpse and slit a vein, and made me drink the blood. That’s how one becomes a Vampire. They are bitten and drained to the point of near-death, and given a Vampire’s blood to drink. It’s not an exact science, and for a while Kyungsoo wasn’t sure I would live. You see, the change causes people to fall into a deep sleep that resembles death, and it takes a few days to wake. But as you can see, I did wake up. And it was Kyungsoo who helped me navigate my early days as a Vampire. He told me that the one who attacked me went rogue because it tried to be civil, and didn’t feed as often as it should have. Kyungsoo told me that I didn’t need to kill to survive, I just needed to allow myself to eat. Vampires are able to manipulate memories, and to heal minor wounds, and he taught me how to control those gifts. I was able to feed without being discovered.

“Harder to keep secret was my identity. Kyungsoo helped me there, too. Every ten to fifteen years, I change out all the member of my staff. I tell them that I’m leaving for some far off place, and that a new member of my family is coming to live here, bringing his own staff. They leave, and I hire new help from all around the country, and I become the new Lord Kim. Sometimes I change my name, sometimes I don’t have to. Jongdae is a family name, by this point I’m something like the eighth Kim Jongdae to live in this house.”

“I see,” Baekhyun said. “So you feed from your staff?”

“Yes,” Jongdae said. “As I’ve gotten older, my gifts have gotten stronger. I can exercise hypnosis over anyone in this house, just by thinking it, I don’t even need to be near them. I pick a member of the staff, and use my gift to bring them to my room. I feed, heal them, and send them on their way. Since they are under hypnosis I don’t need to alter their memories, they won’t remember a thing anyway. I did eat a lot while I was away, but…last night I nearly…”

“You kissed my neck,” Baekhyun finished. “Were you going to bite me?”

“No,” Jongdae said quietly. “But I wanted to. I never felt such a desire to feed before, even though I wasn’t hungry. I suppose that’s why it’s called ‘blood lust.’” Baekhyun shivered, and Jongdae looked aghast. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

“Kyungsoo is the one who created this new protocol for my injections,” Baekhyun interrupted. “What did you give him? Your blood?”

Jongdae nodded. “My blood. And my teeth.”

Baekhyun was startled. “But you’re not missing any!”

Jongdae smiled, showing Baekhyun his perfect teeth. “They grew back. I did go away for business, but also so that Kyungsoo could pull my teeth and allow them time to grow back. Part of Vampirism is never aging, and it’s related to some kind of regeneration that takes over the body. My teeth grew back within two days.”

“Why did he need your blood and teeth?” Baekhyun asked.

“They have certain properties that are useful to a wizard. I suspect that one of the teeth I gave Kyungsoo in the past was used to make your new protocol.”

Baekhyun gulped. “Oh. I see. So that’s why it works so well.”

Jongdae nodded, and he looked at Baekhyun with real regret. “I wish I had known how to tell you. but something like this…how was I supposed to begin the conversation? How was I supposed to show you what I was and not expect you to run away screaming?”

Baekhyun sighed and pushed at Jongdae’s shoulder. “Yes, I know, I see why you did what you did even though I wish it had been different. But I will tell you this, I’m not running. So…have your feelings for me changed at all?”

“No,” Jongdae answered. “They’re the same as they’ve always been.”

Baekhyun nodded. “The…the feeding…does it hurt?”

Jongdae shook his head. “There’s a chemical component in my saliva which, when entering the bloodstream, causes a pleasurable feeling. It makes it easier to erase the person’s memory, fear is much harder to overpower.”

Baekhyun felt himself relax as a new thought occurred to him. “Have you ever fed from me?”

“Never,” Jongdae said. “My staff is here to serve me, and that’s how I rationalize what I do to them. You are my guest, and my friend. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“What if I wanted you to?” Baekhyun asked.

Jongdae looked taken aback. “Do you want that?”

Baekhyun shrugged. “Like I said, I’m not running. Why should I shy from it? Maybe in the future, I’ll get jealous of you feeding from so many pretty young men and women.”

Jongdae snorted. “Well, this took a different turn than I expected. If you really wanted it, I would only consider it if you put on some weight. As it is now, you’re too frail to be giving me more than a taste of your blood, rather than an actual meal.”

“Are you trying to scare me right now?” Baekhyun asked.

Jongdae looked at him blankly. “Are you?”

“No, but you’ve never spoken to me this way before. It makes me curious.”

“Fine, I was trying to scare you. I really don’t want to cause you any pain.”

Baekhyun leaned back to give Jongdae his best glare. “I’m not afraid of you, I’m more afraid of what happens now that I know, I’m afraid to see how you’ll treat me. And you’ve already said that the bite doesn’t hurt, so I’m not afraid of that or of you hurting me physically. But if you pushed me away now, when I’ve only just begun to contemplate beginning something with you, that would hurt me. So for now, can we just try to make something work?”

Jongdae hesitated, but eventually smiled. “Yes, I would like that.”

Baekhyun was a little shocked at himself, he thought he was taking the news a little too well. He was surprised and curious, and he had a lot of questions, but he felt like he should have made more of a fuss over the knowledge that he’d been living with a Vampire for months. But every time he had that thought, he told himself that he was being silly, and there was nothing to make a fuss over. It didn’t hit him until almost a week later why that was.

Baekhyun was dying, no matter how well his new injections worked the fact was that the tumor in his head would not be stopped, and it would take his life. But maybe it didn’t have to be that way. Maybe, Jongdae could turn him into a Vampire. Maybe Baekhyun could live, and live forever. But did he want that?

He thought of his mother, and how she no longer had the option. He would never see her again, in this life or the life beyond this one. And forever was a long time, especially to spend with one person. Maybe he and Jongdae wouldn’t work out, maybe they would grow tired of each other. But there was a whole world out there that Baekhyun hadn’t seen, and it would change a lot as time went on. It would be nice to see it all, to have the whole world open to him like that. He would go from being trapped by his illness to free, completely, wildly, totally free. The idea was worth exploring.

And he would have forever to be with Jongdae. A man he was growing to love with each passing day, expanding on feelings he already had before he knew what Jongdae was. Perhaps this knowledge did deepen his affection, because now Baekhyun knew what a good man Jongdae truly was. He did what he had to do to live, and he tried to hurt as few people as possible in the process. Sometimes he couldn’t help hurting people, but he never did it with any pleasure or malice. He was a good, kind man. And he cared about people. Baekhyun came to learn that Jongdae was a great patron of orphans, having been one himself, and employed working-age youth in safe positions at his factories and other businesses. Jongdae confessed that raising children would be difficult for him, since he couldn’t age and would need to either turn them or cut contact with them, but he loved them and did what he could to help in his own way. And when Baekhyun found that out, all he could think was, ‘Of course he would do something like that. Of course, because he’s Jongdae and that’s what he does.’

He wondered if Jongdae would even consider turning him, but maybe…if he didn’t, Baekhyun could always blackmail him…

No, he would never. That would be wrong, for so many reasons. He had a feeling that he wouldn’t need to worry about it, there was little doubt in his mind that Jongdae would refuse him if he asked. But he refrained from asking until more time had passed.

Several things happened at once to change Baekhyun’s mind about waiting. For one thing, Jongdae did something extraordinary. One day when they were outside, he turned to Baekhyun and handed him an envelope.

“I can’t believe I didn’t give it to you sooner.”

It was a letter, but not just any letter. It was the letter that Baekhyun’s mother had sent Jongdae, requesting that he take Baekhyun in. It was her last moment of clarity, frozen forever on paper, and it was infinitely precious.

“I don’t deserve this,” Baekhyun blurted.

“Why?”

“Because…I didn’t keep my word. When you were away, I went into the west wing. I betrayed your trust.” He began to cry, and he sank to his knees. He felt unbelievably wretched. “I’m so sorry.”

Jongdae knelt beside him and tried to wipe his tears away. “Don’t cry, please. I hate seeing you miserable more than anything. And I’m really not mad, I only asked you to stay away because I didn’t want to expose my secret.”

Baekhyun sobbed, “And I found out anyway, when I went back on my word again!”

“Well, that second time you were worried about me, you said you thought the maid was acting suspicious. And for the first time…well, again, it was kind of my fault. Forbidden fruit and all that, I should have allowed you in while I was gone.”

Baekhyun shook his head. “I should have kept my word. I was dishonest.”

“Alright, fine. You were dishonest, but you didn’t hurt me, or yourself. So I think it’s forgivable. Did you touch anything?”

Baekhyun shook his head. “No, I just looked around. I was curious.”

Jongdae smiled and kissed Baekhyun’s cheek. “And I can forgive curiosity.” He pressed the letter into Baekhyun’s hand. “Please, take it. I know you’ll treasure it far more than I will.”

It was only more proof of what Baekhyun already knew, Jongdae was a good man.

The second thing, was Jongdae’s decision to feed from Baekhyun. It happened when Baekhyun stormed into the West Wing one afternoon, seething with rage. He threw open the door to Jongdae’s study and slammed it behind him.

“You,” Baekhyun hissed, “And your incessant need to make me eat. I can’t fit into anything anymore, not one of my dresses! I’ve gotten fat! I can’t believe I let you do this to me! Nothing is right!”

Jongdae stood up and reached for Baekhyun’s hands. “My dear, you are hardly fat.”

Jongdae took Baekhyun down the hall to his own room, and stood him in front of a mirror. He pinched the back of Baekhyun’s dressing robe, and the back of his own shirt.

“See? We’re the same size now.”

Baekhyun’s breath hitched and he blinked back tears. “I’ve never looked like this before.”

“You’re beautiful,” Jongdae said, “You always have been, but now you’re healthy. Haven’t you noticed that you can be up and outside for longer periods of time now? I bet you could even go for a short carriage ride and feel alright afterwards. And look at your face…your dark circles have disappeared.” He let go of Baekhyun’s robe and faced him, a kind look in his eyes. “I know that you’re upset at the change in your body, but maybe it would help if we had someone come and refit your clothes. All dresses are made with extra material, so they can be let out if the need arises. And those that can’t be altered, I will gladly replace.”

Baekhyun started to feel a little embarrassed at himself. “You don’t have to do that.”

“But I want to,” Jongdae insisted. “I will do that for you, because I want you to be comfortable and happy with yourself. And because I did say that you would need to put on the weight, if you wanted me to feed from you.”

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide. “Now? Can you do it now?” He didn’t miss the way Jongdae’s eyes flickered to his throat. “I know you didn’t feed last night, you must be hungry. Please, Jongdae, I want to help you, especially if you’re going to do something like this for me.”

Jongdae took a deep breath, and Baekhyun’s heart sank as he readied himself for disappointment.

“If you’re sure, then…it can be now.”

Baekhyun gasped. “Do you mean it?”

“If you mean it,” Jongdae said, his voice like steel. “This isn’t something you should take lightly.”

Baekhyun stepped forward and kissed Jongdae square on the mouth. “It’s not,” He said against Jongdae’s lips. “I know what this means. I’m proud to help you like this.”

Jongdae held Baekhyun’s shoulders and backed him up against the opposite wall. He pressed close, and Baekhyun stopped him so he could remove his robe, leaving him in his under shorts.

“So it doesn’t get blood on it,” he explained breathlessly.

Jongdae smirked. “Is that why?”

Baekhyun didn’t have time to answer. Jongdae leaned in and pressed his mouth along Baekhyun’s neck, tongue dragging as he moved up and down, and finally he stopped and pressed his tongue to a vein under Baekhyun’s ear.

“Tell me if it hurts,” Jongdae breathed, and then Baekhyun felt fangs pierce his skin. It did hurt for a second, but only a second. And after that, all Baekhyun felt was pleasure. He slumped against Jongdae’s body, and grabbed at the back of his shirt, ripping it with his nails by accident. Baekhyun moaned as his body grew hot and his head felt light. He closed his eyes, feeling like he was swaying, or floating, or both. He opened his eyes only a second later, and caught sight of himself in the mirror. His eyes looked brighter, his lips pinker, and he grinned at his own reflection.

“This is nice,” he sighed.

Jongdae pulled off Baekhyun’s neck with a deep breath, and over the wounds. He leaned back, his lips, teeth, and tongue covered in blood. Baekhyun felt a little detached, he watched as he reached up and dragged a finger through the mess on Jongdae’s mouth, feeling like he wasn’t in control of his own actions. But after staring at the blood on his finger, he became curious. He put his finger in his mouth and off the blood, mulling over the taste. Jongdae started at him in shock.

“Mm…don’t see the appeal,” Baekhyun mumbled around his finger. He went to take another taste, but Jongdae wiped his mouth. Baekhyun pouted.

“Well fine then,” he grumbled, and then he lurched forward and bit Jongdae’s lip, hard. Jongdae gasped, and Baekhyun right into his mouth, and didn’t pull back until he could no longer taste the blood. By that time he and Jongdae were both panting, and somehow he’d ended up back against the wall, his legs wrapped around Jongdae’s waist, with Jongdae’s hands all over his chest.

“I should feel indecent,” Baekhyun said, “But all I feel is good.”

Jongdae nodded. “That’s not the bite talking, I’ll tell you that.”

“Good,” Baekhyun said. “Then let’s continue.”

But even that wasn’t what really made Baekhyun decide to ask about the change. It made him think about it more, but the final straw came when Baekhyun received a letter from his brother. It was early in the morning, Jongdae was bringing up breakfast from the kitchen, and Baekhyun had just gotten dressed. Seulgi gave him the letter, and left as Baekhyun read it.

‘I have news—father has found a match for you. He’s making arrangements with the man in question now, I believe that he’s a Lord.’

Baekhyun’s heart sank to his toes, and his mouth went dry, and his whole body went absolutely numb. He couldn’t believe that this was happening, he had finally figured out what he wanted, he had exactly what he wanted, and now it was being ripped away from him. He was in shock, and all he could do was stand there with the letter clutched in his shaking fingers.

He dimly registered the door closing.

“Baekhyun? Is everything alright?”

Tears dripped onto Baekhyun’s cheeks. “M-my father i-is arranging…m-match for me,” he stammered. He let out a violent sob and staggered across the room, throwing himself into Jongdae’s arms. “Help me, please, Jongdae, I don’t want to leave you!”

“Baekhyun, shh, oh dear, it’s not what you think!” Jongdae cried. “Oh my love, it’s me, the man your father is matching you with is me!”

Baekhyun froze again. “Wh-what?”

Jongdae his cheeks. “I asked your father for your hand…well, not so much that, but I asked if I could be your patron. I offered him…I knew he wouldn’t let you go so easily, I offered him a lot of money. We’ve been going back and forth for weeks, I accepted his last offer, I sent him the money just yesterday. I was going to tell you when he wrote back to let me know that he received it, it’s only final if he accepts it. I’m sure he won’t go back on this promise, but I didn’t want to tell you just in case.”

“It’s you?” Baekhyun echoed weakly. “Really?”

Jongdae nodded. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I didn’t think you would find out. And I didn’t want…I never had any intention of letting him take you, but I wanted to do it like this, so you would still have a family, so one day you could have your inheritance, and you could still have your brother.”

Baekhyun leaned heavily against Jongdae’s chest, slowly coming to terms with what he now knew. He would never have to leave Jongdae’s side, no one would ever take him away. They could be together forever if they wanted to be.

“Jongdae?”

“Yes?”

“Earlier, did you call me ‘love?’”

Jongdae chuckled slightly. “I did, my love.”

Baekhyun lifted his head. “I love you, too.”

Jongdae kissed his cheeks. “I’m so sorry I scared you.”

“I’m okay,” Baekhyun said, wiping his eyes. “But Jongdae, does this mean that you’ll turn me one day?”

“If that’s what you want,” Jongdae said, “I would be so very happy to spend forever with you. But I don’t want to turn you just yet. There’s still so much for you to experience as a human, and I want you to have that.”

Baekhyun kissed Jongdae then, because it was the only way he knew how to express what he was feeling. He never dreamed he could be so happy. This was his life now, and he had a future he could look forward to. He would have a long life, he would—

“The tumor,” Baekhyun gasped, pulling back. “I never asked! If you change me, will the tumor affect me?”

Jongdae shook his head. “No, I did make sure of that. I asked many of my friends, they all said the same thing, that the change would rid you of the tumor, and the injection you’re getting will be even more of a help when the time comes. That’s another reason to keep you human, for a little longer.”

“Then I’ll be okay,” Baekhyun said, “I’ll actually be okay!”

Jongdae nodded. “And you’ll be loved, you’ll be spoiled with it. And I hope to all the powers in this universe that you’ll be happy.”

“I am happy!” Baekhyun cried, tears coming to his eyes. “I’m so happy!”

See, happy ending!

Next is the epilogue!