Hope
Now and ThenA/N: dialogue in blue means they're speaking in english
Jaemi arrived to the filming set on Thursday morning with a heavy heart and even heavier footsteps knowing that it was her last day. The tension and awkwardness on set was suffocating. Although the director and writers officially addressed the sudden change in the script as a “more dramatic direction” for the drama, practically everybody knew it was because Jaemi had been fired. She had begun to really like acting, even more so than modelling, and now it was over. Given her recent attitude and behavior, she highly doubted she would be receiving any more opportunities to act.
However, there was one person at the filming site who seemed brighter and more cheerful after hearing the news of Jaemi’s departure and the end of Jaemi and Hongbin working together. Yeona could hardly contain her smile as she did Hongbin’s makeup. Hongbin paid no attention to Yeona. He was also disappointed that his first drama would have to end so soon, but he felt even worse for Jaemi. She got fired and dumped. He felt ashamed of himself for ever wishing that she would know how it felt to be heartbroken. He now realized how petty and immature he was, but he could only wish that he could take it all back.
Filming the remaining scenes went about as badly as it had been going the past week or so, but it was still better than Jaemi thought it would be considering all things. Jaemi lingered on the set while the staff and camera crew packed up to move on to the next location without her. Hongbin watched her from a distance feeling guilty. Yeona urged him to leave and go back to practice, but he ignored her. She continued to nag him which made him increasingly annoyed until he couldn’t hold it in any longer.
“Noona, you’re too much!” he yelled angrily. “How can you be so cruel? What did she ever do to you? You’ve been nothing but nasty to her and you don’t even understand anything that’s happened to her. You won’t even try to understand. You just hate her for no reason! Don’t you feel any regret?”
The hurt and embarrassment was evident on Yeona’s face. She blinked back her tears and stormed out of the building, mentally cursing Hongbin and Jaemi the whole way home. Hongbin sighed. Maybe he shouldn’t have been so blunt, but he couldn’t control himself in that moment.
When the last staff member left, Jaemi and Hongbin were asked to leave as well. Jaemi looked around the set one last time before trudging out of the building with Hongbin following behind at a distance. Instead of going home, Jaemi plopped down on a bench and stared blankly ahead, trying to hold in her tears. Hongbin cautiously sat down next to her. They sat together in silence for a few minutes until she finally said, “Thank you for staying with me all this time,” referring not only to waiting around the set with her, but for being with her after all they’ve been through all those years.
Hongbin quietly replied that it was no big deal. They sat in silence for another minute until Jaemi broke the silence again by saying, “You should go. I’m going to be here for a while and you must have a lot of other things to do.”
“It’s ok. I want to stay,” he answered and hesitantly added, “I’m sorry.”
She scoffed to herself and held back her tears. “I know I must look so pitiful, but honestly I can’t complain. I did this to myself. I made mistakes and now I’m paying for them.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Hongbin responded. Jaemi looked at him in confusion. He looked away, unable to look her in the eyes and explained, “We all make mistakes. I made the mistake of wishing that you and Hyuk would break up. I wish I could take it back now, but all I can do is say I’m sorry. I was petty and selfish and I wished it out of spite. I wanted you to know how it felt to be heartbroken…and I wanted things to be like they used to be…and I’m…just sorry.”
Jaemi softened. She had almost forgotten exactly how kind and considerate Hongbin was. She turned his head so that she could look him in the eyes and declared, “I don’t blame you and I never will.” They smiled at each other and she gently placed a kiss on his cheek as a sign of appreciation. He felt immensely relieved. He gently squeezed her hand and they fell back into silence.
“Jaemi,” Hongbin said, breaking the silence. “Can I just say something?” She wordlessly nodded, so he continued, “I think that no matter how upset or angry Hyuk is with you, he could never stop loving you.”
“What makes you say that?” she asked.
“Experience,” he answered. She looked at him in confusion. He took a deep breath and confessed, “I think I still love you. “
Her eyes widened in shock and she didn’t even know how to reply. He saw her expression and quickly tried to explain, “I mean, I love you as a friend. I think I’ve always loved you as a friend—or ok maybe not always—but you know what I mean. I just feel… a lot of love for you… but it’s not like…I’m not in love with you. Do you know what I'm trying to say?”
Jaemi genuinely smiled at him and nodded her head. “I feel the same way, Hongbin.”
He smiled back and continued, “I think it’s the same for Hyuk, except that he’s always been in love with you and always will be. You’re a very hard girl to fall out of love with. Trust me—but my point is…I guess…don’t lose hope and especially, don’t give up. Everything is going to be ok.”
Jaemi let his words sink in and her tears fall. He comfortingly pulled her in for a hug. For once, she believed him.
-----
Hyuk opened his email to see an urgent email from the director of academics. He swore to himself, knowing what the general contents of the email were. He was on track to fail out of school. He checked the time and saw that his first class of the day had just ended, but he had over an hour until his next class was supposed to start. He quickly jumped out of bed and hopped into the shower. He then gathered his books, grabbed a quick snack, and left for class.
He came back to the dorm after his classes and started trying to catch up on all the assignments and readings he missed. Even if he was going to graduate girlfriendless, he was going to at least graduate.
Aidan was pleasantly shocked to see Hyuk freshly washed and back to his normal, studious self when he returned. He warmly slapped Hyuk on the back and welcomed him back from the dead. He suggested that they get something to eat together and Hyuk eagerly accepted the invitation. They ate and talked like normal until Aidan asked what happened to Hyuk.
Hyuk’s expression noticeably darkened when he replied, “Jaemi and I broke up because she was cheating on me.” Just saying it left a bitter taste in his mouth.
“Oh…man,” Aidan responded, unsure what to say.
“It’s ok. I don't care,” he lied, trying to brush it off and ease the awkwardness. They ate in silence for a couple of minutes before Aidan said, “Hey you know, one of Abby’s friends is kind of into you. I could set you guys up if you want. We could do like a double date or something.”
Hyuk winced at the thought of going on a date with a girl other than Jaemi. Aidan sensed his hesitation and added, “C’mon. It’ll help you get over her faster.”
Hyuk furrowed his brow and legitimately considered it. He could tell that Aidan had good intentions and was probably right, so without much more thought, he agreed.
Comments