Sehun felt something familiar drift across his forehead, like a draft from an open window. His eyes opened instantly, adjusting slowly to the dark room. As the rest of his senses returned, he felt the comforting hold of his best friend’s arm, wrapped snuggly around him. They had fallen asleep in that position, Sehun’s head resting on his hyung’s chest. The younger boy closed his eyes, savoring the moment. It had been too long.

The sound of his cell phone broke the spell. As Sehun reached quickly for the side table to silence it, Luhan awoke.

“Sehun-ah” he whispered, reaching for his dongsaeng.

Sehun returned quickly, placing the phone on the pillow beside him before wrapping his arms around the older boy. “I’m sorry hyung. I didn’t mean to wake you. I can’t believe they’re calling me at this time of morning. I should’ve just turned the damn thing off!”

Luhan smiled as Sehun looked up at him. “They must be worried about you Sehun-ah. Maybe you should call them back.”

“No,” replied Sehun tersely, frowning. His expression softened as he saw the change in Luhan’s face. “Hyung, I just. I mean. I don’t want to talk to anyone right now.”

“You’re talking to me,” replied Luhan gently, as he closed his eyes.

Sehun sighed. “I meant any of them.”

“I know. I was just teasing you." He ruffled his maknae’s silky hair. “Maybe I can talk to them. You know, assure them that you’re safe.”

“They should already know that!” answered Sehun. “They know I’m with you. Of course I’m safe.”

“What’s wrong?” Luhan always knew when his best friend was keeping his true feelings to himself. Luhan was the only one that could ever tease them out.

“Nothing. I’m fine.”

Luhan reached a soft hand and caressed the fair skin on Sehun’s cheek. “I already know what it is. I just want you to tell me yourself. It'll make you feel better. I promise.”

“I can’t,” replied Sehun. “I can’t say it. You already know. So why bother asking?”

“I want to help.” Luhan slid down the bed slightly so that the two were at eye level. He wrapped his arms around his best friend’s neck, pulling the boy into a tight embrace. “It’s okay to be sad. It’s always tough to leave home. I know how you feel. You're worried that talking to them might make you remember how much you miss them, but there’s nothing wrong with missing them. I’ll be here to help you get through it. Please, Sehun-ah. They love you.”

Sehun could barely find his breath as he cried into Luhan’s shoulder. It was as if his best friend had stolen the thoughts from his mind. He was trying so hard to keep his emotions at bay, but the words were plucking at his heartstrings. Luhan always knew how to make him feel, feel so deeply that his soul was flooded. It was the reason he loved him, more than anything.

Soon, his tears subsided as Luhan his back. Sehun lifted his head up.

“Better?” asked Luhan with a knowing smile.

Sehun gave a quiet nod. Luhan brought his lips to the young boy’s cheekbone. All of a sudden, everything was fleetingly perfect.

“Who should I call?” asked Sehun, as Luhan pulled away.

“The one who will miss you the most.”

Sehun’s heart sank. He knew that’s what Luhan would say. As much as he wanted to avoid it, Sehun knew that his hyung was right. Kai would need to talk to him directly.

“I’ll help you,” encouraged Luhan, as he rubbed the back of Sehun’s head. “Just hand me the phone if it becomes too difficult. I’ll be right here.”

Sehun nodded once more and reached for his phone.

Luhan could hear the muffled sounds of a familiar voice coming through the speaker. He detected pain, pain that became reflected in Sehun’s face as he listened. It did not take long for the tears to well up in the maknae’s eyes. Soon the droplets were falling heavily down his cheeks. He had yet to say a word after the initial greeting.

Sehun’s eyes silently begged for help. Luhan understood, taking the phone from him as he let the boy bury his tear-stained face into his shoulder.

“Jongin-ah, it’s me, Luhan.”

The voice on the other end was obscured by sobs. “How could you, hyung? How could you?”

“I’m sorry I had to take Sehun from you,” answered Luhan softly, finding the gentle strength he always possessed around his younger members.

“Not just Sehun-ah!” came Kai’s devastated voice. “You took yourself away! Without any explanation! Without telling us when we would ever see you again!”

“I wasn’t even there to begin with, so I can’t really apologize for my own absence. We’re used to being apart by now. I can only apologize for taking Sehun from you, and I’m really sorry. I hope someday you'll understand. Maybe then you won’t hate me for it.” Luhan could feel his heart tearing as he spoke calmly into the microphone.

“We need both of you! Don’t you understand?” Kai was becoming increasingly upset.

“I love you, Jongin-ah. Sehun loves you. That'll never change.”

Luhan’s words were like a stab to his heart. Jongin could find nothing else to say. The sound of sobs, broken by shallow gasps, filled the speaker. Suddenly, there was another voice.

“He can’t take any more of this. Why're you doing this to him?”

Luhan took a deep breath. “It’s best if he lets it out, rather than bottling it up. I’ve explained this to you before, when I asked you to help Sehun for me. Both him and Kai keep all their pain to themselves. They can’t live like that, Suho. Nobody can. They need their hyungs to help them.”

“Only you’ve ever been able to open them up. The rest of us, we just can’t. We’ve tried. I promise. Sehun would never tell me what he's really feeling. And Jongin-ah, half the time, we can’t even tell that there’s something wrong. Even Kyungsoo can barely get him to talk. We’re not you, Luhan. That’s why we need you to come back, please. All of us need you!”

“Things are going to change, leader-shi.”

“Please, don’t call me that. I’m not your leader.”

“You are and always have been. I might be older than you and Kris, but the two of you will always be my leaders, just as much as you are for our dongsaengs. I’ve already explained this to Kris, so I need you to listen. Not just listen, I need you to understand. I don’t know when I’m coming back, if ever. Our members, they'll need you to help them get through it. EXO must go on, and the only way it can is if you and Kris are there for the members. You must learn to get them to come to you for help, and if they don’t, you must recognize when they need it. Just like Kai, they'll unlock their hearts for you, but before they can, they'll need you to give them the key. Do you understand? It's the only way. You don’t have to worry about Sehun-ah. I'll take care of him. But as for the rest of the members, they'll need each other and they'll need you. Especially Kai. He was supposed to come with me, for many reasons. One is that I knew how difficult this would be on him and how difficult it would be on the rest of you. I wish I could help him, but it’s too late now. I’m sorry for placing such a heavy burden on your shoulders. Someday, I hope you'll understand why.”

Suho had begun to cry, silently. He knew that Luhan was right, just as he always was, but reality was too much for him to bear alone. He was a leader, and despite not feeling like one, he didn’t have a choice. He would have to help s get through this. Swallowing hard, he regained his voice. “I’ll do my best, Luhan.”

“I know you will. You always have. I have faith in you. And don’t forget what I told you after we debuted. Even the leader can ask for help. You’re not alone.”

The two said their sad goodbyes before disconnecting. Luhan placed the phone back on the pillow. Sehun had fallen asleep, his head buried deep in his hyung’s shoulder. Luhan laid him down and took his place beside him, holding the young boy tightly in his arms as he tried to fall back asleep. Change was coming. They would need their rest.

---

“I love you, Jongin-ah. Sehun loves you. That will never change.”

Luhan’s words had kept Kai awake. Unlike his tears, his sorrow could not be wiped away with the back of his hand. The sadness had buried itself inside of him, pulling at his viscera. Even Kyungsoo’s embrace could not comfort him. He lay on the side of the hospital bed, teetering on the edge so that there would be more room for his wounded friend. He wanted to grip him tighter but was afraid of putting pressure on those deep cuts, cuts like those that covered his own heart.

Kai had never realized how difficult it would be to love and be loved. He had taken those two for granted so many times. Sehun was the only member he didn’t call hyung. With th