Chanhee POV

I smile faintly as I see the raindrop fall outside the shop. It reminds me of you. The first time we meet each other. The first moment I laid my eyes on you I feel my heart beating faster than normal. It makes me realize that I have fallen for you. My first love ever.

Lies is such a cruel thing.

Everything is over because it was a lies. The feeling that you say you had for me is a lies. All your love words to me are a lies. Our love moment which I cherish the most also is a lies to you. Nothing is true to you.

 All of them are lies.

 And how foolish and naïve I am to believe you. I had no one to blame but myself because I love you too much to trust everyone words about you.

5 years has passed and I still cannot forget about you. I know I should move on but the feeling is too strong. Every time I see him, it reminds me of you. He inherits your features too much until I cannot forget about you.

Why do you torture me like this? What had I done to you?

I snapped out of my thought when I hear the chime of the bell, indicating someone just enter the shop. I ready to greet the person until I realize it was my own son. Today is his first day in kindergarten and I hope he does well. Deep inside my heart, I wish you were here to watch him grow with me.

“Annyeong! How my baby boy day?,” I greet Young Jae happily.

“Omma.. I had fun today at school because I meet new friends. They’re all nice to me,” Young Jae stories his experience on his first day.

“Really? That’s great. I told you already that you will have fun at school,” I pick him up and give a peck on his cheek.

“Yeah. At first I thought school is no fun but actually it’s very fun,”

“Now go upstairs and change your clothes. Then we will have lunch together okay,”

“Alright omma!,”

Young Jae is the evidence of all the sinful things that we had done. Despite the hatred feeling I had to you, I never feel the same toward Young Jae. Although I had him in a very young age, I feel grateful for his presence. He is my source of happiness right now.

I still remember the first time I get to know that I’m carrying your child. I was happy to tell you about it. But unfortunately; it was also the day that you spill out the entire lies to me too. I didn’t manage to tell you about the child because you already break apart my heart. The wound inside my heart is still bleeding until today.

Flashback..

I walk happily toward Byunghun house to tell him the great news. After school finish, I went to the hospitals to find out what is wrong with me. The news is shocking to me. I never know that I had the ability to have it. The doctor told me that it was such a miracle for me to have this ability. I’m sure we will be the happiest family.

“Byunggie! I have something to tell you,” I jump excitedly in his arm.

“Great. I also have something to tell you too,” He seems like trying to ignore me.

“Really? Then you tell me first,” I want to hear him first since I want to surprise him with my news.

“Lee Chanhee, let’s break up,” He suddenly say. Is it true what I’m hearing? I can’t believe it.

“W..what?,” I gasp when realization hit me.

“Let’s break up,” He repeat it again and this time looking at me straight in the eyes. His eyes are different today. It’s not like always.

“A..are you.. joking? Byunggie..,” I try hard to control my tears that wanting to flow out.

“Don’t call me like that anymore okay. We’re over,” He pushes me away from him.

“B..but.. I love you. Did I do something wrong?,” I clinging his arm asking what my mistake. How can he suddenly say something like this?

“Nothing is wrong actually. I date with you because of the bet that I had with my friends. Now a month has passes and it’s time for me to break up with you. Although I feel quite disappointed to let go of you cause you’re so obedient on bed. It’s hard to find a boy like you nowadays,” His explanation really making me shock. I cannot hold my tears anymore. My heart is hurting right now.

“D..didn’t you say that you love me?,” I ask him. Just last night we were whispering how much we love each other. How can it changes so fast.

“Oh come on.. that was just an act for you to believe in me. I make a good actor right? Chanhee.. Wake up and accept the fact that I’m not a gay and all the things that I done with you is just for fun. I did enjoy most of our . Maybe we could do it also after this even though we’re no longer together. I bet you also loves my touch right?,” My heart shatter to pieces when he say this. I cannot believe it. I thought he will be my first and last love.

“You bastard! How could you do this to me?,” I shout at him while sobbing hard. Feeling hatred feeling inside me, I give him a hard slap on his cheek.

“That was a one hard slap. Listen to me Chanhee, I’m not a gay and will not turn gay,” He say it to me while gripping my arm, ignoring how bad I’m sobbing right now.

“But why you still willing to kiss and sleep with me? Does that mean something to you?,”  

“It was purely just a ual thing. I’m young and craving for some excitement so why I should reject when you so willingly give yourself to me. I never feel anything romantic toward you. All of the words that I have told you are just a lies. In fact, the reason I agree to bet with my friends is because I want to get the girl that I adore.

“You’re a bastard! Jerk! ! I hate you so much right now! I’ll never forgive you Byunghun. You destroy my life,” I shouting and start throwing anything that around me to him.

“Call me whatever you want. It’s still won’t change the fact that I’m only using you for my own benefit. After this, never show up in front of me at school,” He gives a warning. Like I really desperate to meet you.

“I also don’t want to meet you anymore. Bastard like you should rot in hell. Everyone is right about you. But I’m too stupid to trust them. You’re really a bastard Byunghun,” I curse him. By now, the love feeling is already replaced by hate. I really hate you.

With one last slap on his face I am running away from his house. I though today would be the happiest day for us but is was the opposite. I hate you Lee Byunghun. I cry really hard that day until I collapse on the ground.

End of flashback

Once again I snapped out of my own thought when I heard the chime of the bell. I turn to look who is coming and it’s no other than my saviour, Changjo.

Changjo is the one who save me after I collapse on the ground. Even though he is younger than me but he is much mature than me. I feel really grateful to him.

After being saved by him, I begin my new life away from Byunghun. I stop schooling and start doing a business. I open a flower shop with my saving money. Most people will ask me why a flowers shop and not other shop. I will simply say because I love flowers too much. Ever since I was little I love flowers.

I could care less with whatever people talk about me. I know boys should not love flowers too much like me. Because of that, Changjo always bullies and call me girly boy. I’m not that girly right? Although it is true my room is pink and my favourite colour is pink. But I’m not girly! When Changjo walk to me, I greet him.

“Annyeong Changjo,”

“You lost in your thought again right?,” Changjo chuckle at me.

“What? I’m not,” I’m pouting when he keep smirking.

“Don’t lie to me. I see you stare blankly at the flower in front you,” He always can read me like an open book.

“How come you know me so well?,” I sigh hopelessly. I could never hide anything from him.

“You’re always easy to be read. Where is Young Jae?,”

“Upstairs. I told him to change his clothes so that we can eat lunch after that,”

“It’s my treat today,” Changjo suddenly say.

“You always treat us. I don’t want to debt with you,” I try to argue with him about it. I don’t want him to keep paying for us. It’s not like I don’t have any money to pay.

“It’s not a big deal. Besides, I cannot let the girl pay for me,” He smirking at me.

“Which girl? Yah!!,” I lost in my own though thinking which girl is he talking about but when realise it was me I smack his arm.

“You’re still so slow at picking up my words,” He still laughing at me.

Only Changjo know the story of my life and the truth about Young Jae. Towards other people it might look like me and Young Jae is sibling but it is not. Young Jae is my son.

Sometimes I wonder why Changjo never date anyone. Ever since I know him, he never brag or bring his love meet me. When I ask him, he always changed the topic. I could only hope that he will not fall for me. I’m not qualifying for him. He is too nice for me.

Hi everyone!

Sorry i'm taking some time to update the first chapter. i'm really happy when i see some people already subscribe and upvote this story even though the first chapter didn't come out yet. Thank you so much for keep supporting my story. I can see many of you like bottom Chanhee as i am. Team chanhee bottom ferever! hehehe... 

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