015

I wake up to lips brushing my cheek, greeted by the sight of a boy with a sunshine smile and sandy brown hair.

“Morning,” Ken murmurs sleepily with the sheets pulled all the way up to his chin. I grin back, burying my face into the pillows when he pecks me on the mouth.

His arms encircle my waist, pulling me against him and I sigh as I curl my knees against my chest, his body heat radiating into me. He kisses my hair, his breathing deep and controlled and I feel like I’m going to drift off again.

“You can’t fall back asleep,” he laughs, gently rocking me in his arms to shake me awake, “I need you with me,”

A fuzzy, content lull pulls at my eyelids, now like lead, yet I force myself to keep them open.

The aftermath of last night has a swarm of butterflies erupting out of nowhere in my stomach, heat diffusing through my bones. I glance up at him through my lashes and ask the question that’s been racking my brain before the two of us had drifted off to sleep.

“How long until...until they need you for the Revive Effect?”

Ken’s gaze softens, his hand coming up to thread his fingers through my hair.

“A week,” he breathes, his thumb tracing along my lower lip.

My eyes close instinctively and my chest feels like it’s going to burst.

“Hey, hey. Don’t cry. Please. Please, don’t cry.”

He cradles my face in his hands with soft words. I shake my head.

“That’s not enough time for me to say goodbye,” I choke out through a tight throat.

“Don’t say that.” he whispers and presses his forehead against my own, “A week is an eternity when I’m with you.”

The statement has me trembling even harder in his arms. I think of everything that’s happened, and the words that I’ve been struggling to admit to myself bubble from my lips.

“I wish you didn’t have to do this, I wish we could be selfish.” I gasp against his chest.

It sounds uglier spoken aloud and I immediately regret it. Guilt and nausea wash over me with the realization that I had basically admitted preferring to deactivate all Augments instead.

The image of Ravi, with laughter sparkling in his eyes and Rebecca in his arms flashes through my mind; the night I had met Ken. Leo with his head tilted to the side, gazing down at Miyoko with that rare smile on his lips. After everything we’ve been through, it’s not only until now I realize that Ken and I are just pale reflections of them. We all share the same mutual connection. Love. I’d never be able to live with myself if it’s me that tears us all apart.

But for a moment, just a fleeting second, I don’t care. I don’t care and that’s what scares me the most.

Ken lets out a soft breath and I look up into his face, moisture glistening in his eyes.

“I do to, but I can’t, we can’t.”

The fact that he feels just as conflicted, just as confused as I am has me reaching for his hand. I nod with closed eyes, “I know.”

~~

When I get out of the shower, Ken is gone, a note left on the bedstand explaining that he needed to head back to the quarantine area for more tests. I change quickly, taking care in fixing my bloodshot appearance. I even practice my smile in the mirror a few times for good measure. Lines have started to crease my face and I frown. All of the stress is finally starting to catch up to me.

I leave my apartment with a heavy heart and bump into Hyuk, who’s been pacing the hallway by the looks of it.

“Hey,” he smiles. Before I can answer, he takes me by the arm and walks us to the elevator, pushing the button for the top floor and the two of us shoot upwards as the doors shut. When I ask him where we’re going, he shushes me with a loud hiss, a finger pressed over his lips. Hyuk has his arm looped through mine the whole ride, grinning like an idiot. I quirk an eyebrow in his direction and he smiles even wider, coaxing a chuckle out of me.

“Weirdo,” I giggle.

The doors slide open and Hyuk steps out first before the fabric of a blindfold is pulled over my eyes.

“Hyuk. What the .”

“Calm down, I’m not gonna do anything,” he says in such a way that I can picture him rolling his eyes. He pushes me forward and I nearly break my arms as I stumble to keep myself upright. He snorts and I glare in what I assume to be his direction, hands on my hips.

“Sorry,” he laughs.

A gentle hand comes to rest at the small of my back as Hyuk starts to guide me down the hallway. He walks with slow, careful steps, like he feels sorry for teasing me earlier. I hear the definite click of a door opening and closing behind us and the shuffling of movement. Hyuk leaves my side and I let out a whimper, my fingers groping empty air. He laughs again, the sound farther away. More movement this time, the shuffling of shoes and the soft scrape of a chair being pulled across the floor.

“You can take it off now,” Hyuk’s voice sounds from across the room. Confused, I untie the blindfold and blink a few times as my eyes adjust to the lighting.

I’m standing in Ravi’s apartment and Hyuk, Leo and Rebecca stand side by side at the far end of the room. In front of them, the table is adorned with all sorts of sweets, cakes and sugared fruits. Porcelain cups and saucers sparkle beneath the chandelier, wedged between several pitchers of tea and coffee.

“We thought it would be nice to treat you to something special,” Rebecca says softly. My eyes flicker to the three of them. Hyuk looks like he’s going to pounce on the cakes at any second, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet as he looks to me. Rebecca claps her hands once.

“Oh, I almost forgot!”

She pulls out a paper party hat and moves to Leo. He takes a step back.

“No,” he says crisply.

“C’mon, Leo, you promised.”

He purses his lips together in a tight frown but doesn’t move backwards again. Rebecca smiles and slips the elastic over his chin, adjusting the hat as she pleases. Leo stands stock still for several seconds with his hands folded before Rebecca nudges him in the side with her elbow.

“Leo,” she practically hisses through clenched teeth. His eyes dart to her, mouth still in a hard line as he exhales sharply, closing his eyes in what resembles defeat.

“The most important meal of the day, serving it up Mari’s way,”

His voice is so quiet, barely above a whisper and I’m trying so damn hard not to burst out laughing. Leo looks like he wants to drop dead, staring up at the ceiling like he wishes he could evaporate from the room right then and there. He’s staring daggers at all of us, the party hat looking even more comical with his stony expression.

I rush across the room and wrap all three of them in a tight hug.

“You guys are the best. Thank you.” I murmur.

“Of course.”

“The food’s gonna get cold,” Hyuk says.

“Can you not think about food for a minute, Hyuk?” Rebecca shoves him in the arm.

“Not really.”

He moves to the table and starts to pile food on his plate. Leo turns to Rebecca.

“...is it alright if I go now?”

She smiles softly and claps him on the shoulder, like some sort of silent, mutual agreement has been fulfilled.

“Sure, Leo. Thanks for coming.”

He nods once, glancing at me and nodding once more before padding over to the door and exiting silently.

“He forgot to take the hat off.” Hyuk says with his mouth full.

The food is delicious. Rebecca tells me that the two of them had been baking non stop for several days, which makes everything taste all the more sweeter.

The three of us move to the couches and I set my cup of tea down on the coffee table as Hyuk and Rebecca wedge themselves on either side of me.

“Sorry we couldn’t get everyone up here,” Hyuk says, rubbing the back of his neck with downcast eyes, “Ravi was nice enough to let us borrow his apartment since the doctors still won’t release him yet, and Ken and N couldn’t make it because...um...you know..” he trails off.

“Hyuk, this is fine. Really.” I respond with a shake of my head, “this was really sweet of you.”

His face splits in a sparkling smile, shrugging up his shoulders with glee and I touch his cheek.

“I’m glad. Next time we’ll make sure everyone can join, I’ll invite Hongbin and the others too.” he says.

My heart twists in my chest and I return his reply with a quick smile. I don’t know if there will be a next time with everyone. At least not one with Ken.

~

Hyuk starts to groan about a stomach ache after his twentieth cookie so I shoo them to the other room to clean up, mostly so that he can go lie down in the spare bedroom. I start to stack up the cups and plates and place them in the sink, wrapping up the pastries and storing them in the fridge. I turn on the tap and start washing the dishes, scrubbing with diligent fingers.

I haven’t been in this apartment since the night N lay unconscious against the back wall, and it feels rather ominous to be here again. To think that this is where it all began, the first instant when the virus had slithered into Ravi’s programming and corrupted his data the moment that bolt of lightning had killed the power in the entire tower.

A shiver runs down my spine and I twist the hot water knob as far as it will go, the steam clouding around my head.

The water is scalding to the touch but I don’t feel it.

~~

Hyuk still isn’t feeling well by late evening so I bring him a fresh cup of lemon tea, something that I used to make for Rebecca when she wasn’t feeling well. After checking on him, I head back to the kitchen to finish up the rest of the dishes and click on the tv. The white noise brings me a sense of comfort and I’m almost done with everything before the mention of Ken’s name pulls me from my work and has me setting down the plate I’m rinsing back into the soapy water.

I twist to face the screen, drying off my hands with a towel. Ken’s name is said again this time, along with a quick flash of a picture, his usual, sparkling smile on his face. It cuts to a video feed of him in the quarantine area conducting tests, all sorts of machines hooked up to him, government personnel dressed in body suits and black combat boots bustling about. He grins when the camera pans to his face, a sharp contrast to all the wires and tubes coiled around his arms, something that sends chills down my spine. His smile is all for show.

The camera cuts away from Ken and a female reporter is seen in the studio. My blood turns cold. It’s the same woman who had been at the scene of the riots hours before the bomb had detonated in the North Tower. She’s less anxious now and her voice sounds stale and flat, like she’s rehearsed her lines so many times to the point where the emotion is no longer there.

Ken will be the first individual to undergo the Revive Effect, the newly launched, revamped form of Augmentation developed by AIRCE. This new method demonstrates the positive effects of Augmentation by targeting terminally-ill patients and allowing them to experience life in ways that they have never been able to before, as well as all the benefits of the enhanced human physique. However, as Subject Zero, Ken will have to give up his life. This is to eliminate all possible resistance from the original host as the second personality is introduced into the system and to ensure that no two personalities will fight for control over the body, guaranteeing that the future selected candidate to use his body as a vessel will have all control.

All of Seoul praises you for your decision. With your sacrifice, we will open the door for more future volunteers on the Revive Effect, and ultimately create a better Seoul, a better world. As we near the final days, we will forever remember your bravery, and we honor your courage and your sacrifice.

Thank you, Subject Zero.

Tears fall from my eyes in heavy drops, my entire frame trembling as I fall to my knees, burying my face in my hands as I struggle to catch a breath. I bite the fabric of my sweater between my teeth to keep from screaming, the material soaked as I furiously wipe at my face.

I hear a faint, choked yelp and look up, surprised to find the bedroom door open, only to curse at myself, realizing that I had forgotten to close it. Through the doorframe I can see Hyuk lying on his back on the bedspread. He has an arm draped over his eyes and he’s shaking with gritted teeth.

He’s crying.

Rebecca sits at his side, her fingers entwined with his other hand.

“Hyuk, don’t cry.” She mumbles through her own tears. Her voice cracks.

~~

I wash my face in the bathroom. I can hear Hyuk whimpering from the other room, followed by Rebecca’s cooes and sniffles and fire starts to roll in my belly.

All of the crushing sadness and pain that I felt when I had first learned the news of Ken’s necessary death is now replaced with burning rage.

My father, my loving father now lay cold in the ground. AIRCE, the same branch that he had worked so devotedly for, was now turning against us with intimidation. They had used N like a chess piece, ordering him to follow through with this experiment or threatening to switch off all Augments. Ravi and Leo. Rebecca and Miyoko. Everything and everyone is tied into this whole storm and it all comes down to rest on Ken’s shoulders.

A boy I’ve fallen so damn hard for, even from the first instant I saw him. The gravitation that pulled me in instantly. His playfulness, his laughter, his ability to make me focus on the good. His devotion in helping others, his protectiveness of his loved ones, of Ravi.

The one thing that he would have given anything for, of protecting us and his best friend had turned into his tragic flaw, the spark that started everything. The fact that AIRCE had swept him up at his weakest like that has me shaking to the point where I have to grip the sink to try and steady myself.

I smash my fist into the nearest breakable object, which happens to be the bathroom mirror. Red hot pain shoots up my arm as the shards of glass slice through my knuckles but I ignore it, bringing back my hand to crash it into the mirror again and again.

Rebecca’s arms encircle my waist, pulling me away from the shattered glass and I shove her off of me roughly. She stumbles backwards a few steps, eyes widening when she sees the blood. She tries to approach me again but I bolt out the door and out of the apartment entirely, my legs pumping as fast as they can.

~~

The quarantine zone is set up in the old offices of the North Tower, right around the epicenter of where the bomb had detonated. The area is rather unfamiliar to me in its wrecked, ruined state and I struggle to find my way around, clutching my bloodied hands to my sides as I sneak around the hallway corners.

I spot a familiar figure at the end of the hallway and move with my back against the wall to stay hidden from their line of sight. As they approach, I duck out of my hiding spot and pull them into a spare room, closing the door shut behind us.

“Mari! How did you..?” Ken sputters before his hands cup my own, worry wrinkling his face, “you’re hurt. Who did this to you?”

“I want you to come with me, I’m taking you with me and back to the others.” I respond.

He shakes his head. “I can’t, they’re looking for me. You need to get out of here before they find you.”

“I’m not leaving without you!”

Suddenly, the door opens, revealing a soldier weighed down with heavy artillery and other equipment. He stiffens up when his eyes tear from Ken to me, ripping the radioing device off of his shoulder to call for backup.

“Hostile intruder found with Subject Zero!” he yells.

The first bullet grazes my neck, the other three lodging themselves into my lower abdomen and shoulder. White hot pain explodes through my body, fire burning in my lungs as the impact has me crumpling against the back wall. The familiar coppery taste of blood fills my mouth, my arms hanging limp at my sides.

“You ing shot her!” Ken’s voice breaks with a scream. He lays me down on the floor, using his hands to apply pressure to my stomach. I convulse in agony at the sudden weight and try to push his hands away.

“That h-hurts..” I gasp desperately.

“I know, baby, I know it does.” he murmurs, “I have to put pressure here otherwise you might bleed out.”

I try to respond but start to gurgle as crimson bubbles between my lips and then the realization clicks that I’m choking on my own blood. I twist my head to the side and spit, the movement in my neck causing all my nerve endings to scream.

Ken’s eyes flicker across my face, smoothing back my blood-caked hair. My vision starts to fade in and out and I struggle to focus on him, gripping his hand tightly as a whimper leaves my mouth, bone dry.

“No, no.”

“Ken,” I whisper.

“You’re gonna be alright. Trust me, ok?”

My eyelids suddenly feel like lead and they droop once.

“Stay with me, Mari. Don’t leave me here alone, please.”

My eyes flutter once more before I can’t resist it any longer and close them completely, the muscles in my face relaxing completely

I hear a scream before my vision goes black.