The days that followed Sehun's return were better….and worse.

It was better because I was settling back into a familiar routine of school, homework and dinner alone with a call from Jongin every night to make sure I was home safe. I caught a few freshman boys smiling shyly in my direction while I was walking alone and overheard a girl saying I was pretty as she gossiped with her friends in the washroom; that was flattering. The weather was cool and windy—just the way I liked it—with the occasional shower in between the days. The workload was bearable, almost enjoyable, and my mind felt satisfyingly stretched instead of weary. I began to feel that the school term would be good after all.

But it was worse because I was often physically tired since my father had left for New York for a week this time and I was the only one taking care of my mother. Jongin invited me over for dinner a few times and accompanied me on some of my hospital visits after school, but I often went without telling him, if only because I felt like my own family was my responsibility and Jongin had enough of his own. It was worse because I dropped my phone and it cracked on the sidewalk, so I had to use a huge, blocky phone that I dug out of my father’s drawer and looked like an archeological artifact left over from the Stone Age. It was worse because Sehun was blowing most of our study sessions off.

It had been almost two weeks since school started, but in that period of time, Sehun had only made it to a grand total of two study sessions out of a scheduled six and cancelled the rest at the last minute. It frustrated me, because he was the one struggling to keep up with the rest of the class but didn’t seem concerned, while I was the one assigned to tutor him and making all the effort. It was partly a matter of pride for me, but also, I was hurt that he didn’t bother. Part of me wanted to confront him and demand to know if he actually wanted to continue with the tutoring. But I knew too well I wouldn’t, because I honestly didn’t want to get into another fight with him so soon after the last.

It was raining one morning when I walked into class with Jongin, trying to keep my eyes from going automatically to the desk where Sehun sat behind Soojung and totally failing. Sehun’s seat was glaringly empty and he had been missing for the past two days. I averted my eyes, trying not to feel disappointed and failing at that too. I had already made up my mind to stay friends and keep any feelings I still had for Sehun locked down, but it was obvious it would take some time before I could be completely unaffected romantically by Sehun.

I couldn't help wondering if he was late or just skipping school, and I couldn't help worrying about him. But that much, just worrying, that was okay, right?

“Where is Sehun?” Jongin asked, saving me the curiousity.

Soojung shrugged, crossing her slim legs nonchalantly without looking up from her phone. Probably texting Minho oppa. “I don’t know—did anyone text him?”

“I did,” Jinri said, looking up from her perch on the edge of her desk in front of Soojung’s. Seulgi flicked an eraser at Seungwan, missed, and clipped Jinri's arm instead. Jinri swatted at Seulgi in a half-hearted reprimand before pursing her lips at her phone. “He didn’t reply.”

I tried not to laugh at how disgruntled she sounded. After all, it was rare that Choi Jinri got ignored by any member of the opposite .

“Maybe he’s sick,” Taemin suggested, his arm stealthily and strategically placed on the back of Naeun’s chair.

“Maybe,” Jongin said, and let it drop at that before he placed my textbooks on my desk. Seungwan and Seulgi didn’t even look up to tease me about that anymore; Jongin always insisted on carrying the thicker books for me even when I told him I was perfectly fine handling them myself. It had become an unspoken ritual: Jongin would meet me at the bus stop in our neighbourhood, we boarded the bus and sat next to each other, we got off and he wrangled any extra bag or books I was carrying besides my backpack off me and we walked the rest of the distance like that.

“Thanks,” I smiled at him.

“No problem.” This was routine. He took his accustomed seat beside me, immediately flopping over to catch a few winks before class started.

The classroom was buzzing quietly with conversation; it was too early in the morning and the general atmosphere was still a little quiet but everyone quickly snapped to attention to greet Mr. Choi when he came in for homeroom period. He nodded, waving at us to take our seats before chairs screeched against the floor as people sat down again in a clatter of noise and mutters. He took attendance and I kept my head down even when he called Sehun's name and Taemin told him Sehun was probably sick. 

"Again?" Mr. Choi was incredulous.

"Yes, sir."

He made another sound that sounded vaguely irritated before continuing with roll call.

I tried to stay focused on a new pattern I was doodling on the edge of a notebook and carefully kept my eyes away from the door, but then Mr. Choi called my name. I looked up, startled.

“Yes, sir?”

“Come here,” he beckoned. I obediently rose from my seat and made my way to the teacher's desk at the front of the room.

“Do you know where Oh Sehun is?” he asked without preamble, passing a hand over his shiny forehead. He sounded annoyed.

“No, sir,” I replied honestly. “I have no idea.”

“Hm.” Mr. Choi frowned. “You two are close friends, yes?”

“Oh, um….” I hesitated. “I suppose."

Mr. Choi clicked his tongue in irritation, grumbling under his breath. 

I paused. "If you don't mind me asking—how did you know, sir?”

“He was interviewed before being allowed entry into the school," Mr. Choi said shortly. He looked up. "He mentioned knowing a few students in this class, and Jongin and you specifically."

"Oh." I smiled, flushing, inexplicably pleased. "Yeah, we were close."

"Childhood friends, he said."

"Yes. I've known him for a very long time."

His frown deepened as he tapped his pen on the edge of his desk thoughtfully before he asked slowly, “How is the tutoring going?”

“Perfectly fine, sir.” I didn't bat an eyelash as I lied. I knew Sehun might get a talking to from Mr. Choi, and I didn't want him to get into trouble and think I was snitching on him. I made a decision there and then and smiled beautifically at the balding teacher. Jongin had told me I had a very sweet, inno