(BACKSTORY)

(34) KYUNGSOO I

Winter was never really a season to enjoy, because for Do Kyungsoo, that meant hot drinks. It's not that he hated them. It was more of a childhood fear; he would take a sip of the creamy hot chocolate, jump from the shock of the burn on his lips, and spill the scorching hot beverage all over himself. Though it's only happened once, he can't help but shake whenever he holds anything considered a hot beverage, so he sets it down immediately and refuses to drink any more.

His parents are not aware of this. In fact, they are unaware of many of his fears, likes, dislikes, ambitions and all. Because, Kyungsoo's initial dream was to become a singer.

He's been singing ever since he was little, and at nine years old, he had decided that he would show the world his voice in the future. Determined, he would practice every day, but his parents would always fail to notice just how much effort he put into it.

He boasts about it one day during dinner, expressing and gesturing with his hands, only to be crushed by their blank stares.

"Didn't you want to be an astronomer?" His mother asked, and Kyungsoo is very confused, because he has never once brought up the subject. He has never felt a touch of ambition for dealing with planets and stars. Not like how he felt when singing.

His father sided with him on the matter and just as quickly as Kyungsoo’s hopes were brought up, they were slammed down and crushed into the dirt.

“It was a firefighter, honey, not an astronomer.”

If they had just taken the time to listen to him, just once, he was sure he’d be able to convince them. Kyungsoo was special and at nine years old, he had a voice that could rival some of the best singers in Korea. Sure, this came from his own personal point of view, but if he could imitate their years of practice and still be able to make the flow and rhythm his own, then he was sure to be of some interest in the music industry. This applies even if he hadn't yet reached puberty.

Kyungsoo looked at both of his parents incredulously, studying their straightforward gazes before letting out a sigh. It was clear that they thought they were right, and Kyungsoo left it at that before he had gotten more upset and was given another stupid life lesson.

Life lessons were lessons of wisdom, and knowledge never applied to Kyungsoo, not in the slightest. This is why he thought they were stupid and resorted to calling them useless overall. He was a nine year old boy with a goal to become a singer. This was his dream, and yet his parents would try to cheer him up with books about knitting, or the names of each bone in the body. None of that was relevant for making his dreams come true and although he appreciated their effort to try, he always thought that they didn’t care about his dreams at all. That they were trying to force him upon a different path, because they didn’t like what he had planned for himself. This was not a dream a nine year old boy ought to have- not yet.

He sat in his room with a green permission form in his hand on what classes he was supposed to take for the upcoming school year. There were two options; One option being what most of the boys chose: the athletics route, meaning he’d be able play and have hands on experience during almost all of his classes as long as it was doing some kind of physical activity. The other was a cluster course that a majority of the girls took, which included the much more ‘feminine’ activities, such as cooking, sewing and chorus.

Chorus was the only real reason why Kyungsoo had considered taking the other course and since his parents didn’t pay attention to what classes he took anyways, he’d figured that he’d be able to take the second option.

Kyungsoo had everything planned out. The moment he had woken up for school for the new year, he’d take his time getting ready, purposely almost making himself late so that when he’d have to rush to school, he’d have ‘forgotten’ that he needed a parent signature for the course slip. His parents would be too rushed to pay attention to what they were signing and would just sign where he prompted them to, earning him another stepping stone to further pursue his dream of being a singer.

Just as he planned, everything was going smoothly, in fact, much too smoothly. Kyungsoo took his sweet time sliding his socks on and even found that they were on backwards, somehow turning that into an excuse to take both his socks off again and restart.

The clock read 7:45 and he had about fifteen minutes until school started, which meant he’d have to run to make it on time. It wasn’t that bad since it was only about a five minute walk, but with such precious time at stake here, he couldn’t fail.

“Mom, wait!” Kyungsoo called out, waving the green slip around so she could see it. “I need you to sign my course papers.”

He had already drawn a perfectly neat red check mark in the second course option, giving his mother an easy way to figure out where to sign. She took the paper quickly and rummaged around her purse for a pen, only to find her darling little angel Kyungsoo holding one up for her oh so conveniently.

“Thank you sweet heart-”

The cut off sentence, and that wasn’t good. Kyungsoo felt his heart rate increase as she had stopped what she was doing to take a good look at his course paper.

“Dear, I think you marked the wrong course. The boys always take the first course option, do they not?”

Kyungsoo felt his palms turn sweaty as his mother continued to look over his paper, placing it down onto the kitchen counter before she drew a big X over the second course entirely. Scrawling her signature down at the bottom, she handed it back to him before heading out to go to work. He was devastated as he saw all of his hard work go to waste, not even finding the energy to run to school anymore.

Just to make things worse, he arrived right as the teacher had come in to teach for the day, prompting the students to hand in their signed course cards. They’d be given about ten minutes to collect them all before the kids would be taken to their designated course classes.

Sitting at his desk, Kyungsoo almost began to cry at the ugly mark over the course he wanted to take. He couldn’t bring himself to stand up and turn in his paper at all, crushing it in his hands before hiding his face in his arms. His sudden sadness was clearly visible and the teacher noticed, though she didn’t do anything but watch for a while. She sat at her desk and talked to the children that crowded around her, only making her move once the bell rang for the students to leave.

She had gone down on her knees next to Kyungsoo’s desk, his small stature barely hovering over her much larger one, though since she was kneeling, she looked up at him.

“Kyungsoo? Is there a reason why you didn’t turn in your course paper?” She asked gingerly, as if speaking any louder would cause him to break down.

Lucky she had, or else she’d have to deal with something worse than Kyungsoo’s hot tears spilling down his cheeks as they plopped into the cloth of his pants.

“I-I have it…”

“Let me see it then, may I?”

He handed his crumpled paper over to the teacher and she smiled, lips curving upward so softly that Kyungsoo almost began to feel better by how she wasn’t taking this the wrong way. The slightly relieved feeling he had was shot down once the green course paper was smoothed out and visible to the world, showing the ugly X over the course he really wanted.

“Oh dear, looks like your mother didn’t understand that she just needed to make a small check mark by the course.” The teacher chuckled, walking back to her desk.

She beckoned Kyungsoo to follow, which the boy did. He was intrigued by her answer when he was sure she would write him down for the wrong course, or at least yell at him for not turning in the form the first time.

“So, course two with chorus, right?”

With every spin of the pencil between her skinny fingers, Kyungsoo could slowly feel the time around him slow, as if she were the one controlling his sudden disbelief. Which she was, though not intentionally.

“I’ve heard you sing before, Kyungsoo, and you’re very talented even despite not having any lessons.”

How she would’ve known that was vague, especially since the only time they really did anything vocal was when they had to sing the school song. With Kyungsoo’s voice blending in with hundreds of kids his age, he was shocked that she would’ve heard his voice clearly enough to compliment him.

“Unless you want to take course one, then I guess I’ll have to-”

“No!” Kyungsoo shouted, slapping a hand over his mouth as he sheepishly apologized.

The teacher didn’t look mad, just a little startled if anything and she waited patiently for his answer.

“I… I signed up for the second course.” He said a bit more confidently, his sudden bravery making the teacher smile.

“Alright, you’re all set. Go head on over to Mr. Yoon’s class in the library along with the other students. If you get in trouble, use this.”

The teacher handed Kyungsoo a small chocolate, its sweet smell wafting through the air even while being encased in the beige tin foil wrapping.

“Chocolate?” He said, scrutinizing the tiny candy as if it would solve life’s problems.

“Not just any chocolate, but his favorite chocolate. Now get a move on before you’re really late!”

Kyungsoo smiled at his teacher, much more genuinely than he’s ever done before and she smiled back, happy to see one of her students so happy. His light foot steps pattering down the halls was all Kyungsoo could hear, and he found the sudden quiet very relaxing. Pausing in front of the doors to the library, taking a deep breath before opening the door.

There were girls everywhere. And as soon as Kyungsoo opened the door, their eyes were all on him. He felt a little anxious at having so many people pay attention to him at once, but he was even more scared once the teacher had stopped speaking to look at him too.

“Name?” The teacher asked, clearly not happy to have been interrupted.

“D-Do Kyungsoo…” He whimpered, shying away from the teacher’s gaze.

The teacher sighed before walking up to where Kyungsoo was located, going down on one knee before patting his head. “You’re in the wrong class buddy. This is for the course two students.”

Kyungsoo felt like the teacher would kick him out any second and ed his hand forward before he could say another word, presenting the chocolate in his hands to the teacher who was shocked by the sudden offer. He recognized the chocolate at once and plucked it out of Kyungsoo’s hands, unwrapping it and popping the chocolate into his mouth. The serene smile on the teacher’s face mimicked the same smile the previous teacher had, and just like that, Kyungsoo was brought over to the front of the class.

“Looks like Ms. Lee was your original teacher before the course changes.” He said, his fingers of the excess chocolate before tossing the rubbish into the trash. “Next time, don’t crush the chocolate so much in your hands. You won’t be a good cook if you don’t have self control kid.”

Though he meant it as more of a warning, Kyungsoo’s chest couldn’t help but flutter at his teacher’s words, giving him a happy smile as he went down to sit next to his fellow classmates. The girls all scooted away from Kyungsoo, though when he had given them his own soft smile, he saw their demeanors visibly relax and some would even smile back at him.

“So, as I was saying.” The teacher continued, “I will be your teacher for the cooking part of the course, while Ms. Lee will be your instructor for chorus.”

One of the girls had raised her hand and waited patiently for the teacher to call on her before asking her question. “What about for sewing?”

The teacher hummed a little, leaning against the front desk. “Well, that class seemed a little boring, so Ms. Lee and I were planning on turning that into a class based on what you kids wanted to learn. So it would be like a class where you can pick what you feel like doing, and we’d try our best to help you in any way we can. Prepares you for life better than a PE class would, am I right?”

Some of the girls chattered excitedly about the new change, while Kyungsoo himself was just relieved he wouldn’t have to share any classes with any of the other boys. He was shy around teachers, and a bit more daring around the girls, but with the boys at his school, he would sometimes have to restrain himself from punching them all in their faces. They were known to be rude and mean for absolutely no reason at all, and for that, Kyungsoo detested them.

From that day on, Kyungsoo’s life in school turned into a blissful passing year. He learned how to cook basic foods like fried rice and noodles, and found out he was pretty good at that, minus all of the girls trying to take his cookies whenever they had special baking classes. The free day classes were fun too and Kyungsoo especially enjoyed talking to the other kids in his class, whom of which were all girls, and get to know them better. He’d made more friends in those few months than in his entire life, having a blast every time he’d go to school for the day.

It was especially fun though, since it was obvious that Mr. Yoon and Ms. Lee had some sort of thing going on for each other, having more fun in their classes together than when they were apart. Kyungsoo would put in a few comments here and there and sure enough the other girls had caught on, everyone chanting for them to kiss during classes even when they would reject the ideas with red blushes on their faces.

He learns that Mr. Yoon is very clumsy, makes silly jokes, and has a tendency to scratch his head when embarrassed, whereas Ms. Lee giggles at everything he does, comes off as dainty, and worries whenever Mr. Yoon somehow hurts himself.

Chorus was, by far, his favorite class though. The way that Ms. Lee taught was that they’d all practice three songs every week. One song was a class effort song where they’d all learn to sing together as one, while another song was used for duets. Since Kyungsoo was the only boy in the class, it was clear that he’d be a popular partner pick from the girls’ perspectives, even if some were still trying to get over their ‘boys have cooties’ phase.

The last song was a solo song, and this song was the easiest for Kyungsoo do because he’d be free to choose any song he wished, sing at any pitch and use any amount of ad libbing or extra power as he wanted without having to worry about overpowering another kid.

While practicing with a few of the girls in his class, he saw the Mr. Yoon suddenly pop in through the door of their class, clearly looking for someone among the young kids. He called Kyungsoo over and the latter obeyed obediently, finding a big surprise waiting for him outside.

Kyungsoo has never seen so many balloons before, let alone this many flowers.

“What’s going on?” He asked, still baffled by how strong the floral scent was.

Mr. Yoon just gave him a grin before leaning down and whispering a ‘plan’ into Kyungsoo’s ears, Kyungsoo’s eyes growing wide as the smile on his face grew even wider. This was something Kyungsoo could definitely do, and he gave the teacher a thumbs up before running back into the class.

Ms. Lee was grabbing their new note sheets from the library and this left the kids to do independent study, which Kyungsoo thought was weird since teachers weren’t usually allowed to leave their students unattended. It turns out that she had called Mr. Yoon over to watch over her class, and that helped out with what he was trying to do even more.

“This is a surprise, so everyone needs to listen to Mr. Yoon, okay?” Kyungsoo said, the class’s attention on him as he helped Mr. Yoon setup the class.

Kyungsoo had passed out a tiny bouquet of flowers to each of the girls before holding onto the balloons himself, telling the girls to all hide under the desks and wait for his signal to jump out and throw their flowers up. Mr. Yoon was scrambling to get everything set up properly before he had heard the familiar pair of sneakers squeaking in the hallway, making him shut off the lights for what came next.

Ms. Lee came into the room expecting to find all of her students practicing diligently, but when she the light, all she could see were flowers and balloons everywhere as her students popped out of their hiding spots.

“Surprise!” They all yelled together, some voices louder than the others, but still giving the group effort that extra push it needed to look well put together.

“Whats going on here?” She said with an unknowing smile, mouth slightly agape as she grinned at all of the balloons hanging around the place.

This was Kyungsoo’s turn to do his thing and he ran up to Ms. Lee before giving her his bigger bouquet of flowers along with the balloons in his hand. He didn’t know why he had to give her balloons when there were so many around the room, but since Mr. Yoon asked him specially, he’d do the deed.

While her face was being blocked by the balloons, Mr. Yoon had come out of his hiding spot and took his position in the center of the class, pressing play on Ms. Lee’s music player before an upbeat song had started to play.

♫ Come to the inner side of the sidewalk

I’ll pull you in so you won’t get hurt

When we’re eating together

I’ll neatly place your spoon and chopsticks on a napkin

Even when I don’t get enough sleep in the morning

I’ll get up earlier and give you a morning call

From the moment I started liking you

Not a single day has been ordinary

We’re close friends, we pretend not to have feelings ♫

Kyungsoo had to be really honest, but Mr. Yoon could not sing a single note on key. The girls all covered their ears as he wailed and the only person that seemed to be enjoying his performance was none of other than Ms. Lee as she laughed and sang along with him.

♫ I introduce you as a good friend

But there are words lingering in my mouth

I am in love with you, I wanna give you- ♫

When he had stopped his sentence, Mr. Yoon had done a little spin before going down on one knee, pulling out a tiny black box that Kyungsoo could recognize all too well from the dramas he’d watch on TV. The box had opened to reveal a little ring with a shiny diamond on top.

Ms. Lee didn’t know what to say and just stood with her hands covering , watching as Mr. Yoon took the ring out and bowed for her left hand. The ring fit perfectly on her finger, and Kyungsoo could only see her mouthing a ‘Yes’ under the loud music before he had turned around to face his classmates.

“Now!” He shouted with glee, turning around with two tiny bouquets.

The entire class had tossed up their flower bouquets and were in for a shocking surprise when the flowers all fell out of their paper holdings. Kyungsoo felt his heart stop at the sudden mistake that could’ve happened, but then something even better had happened.

The flower petals fluttered down all around the two lovebirds like soft feathers, turning the entire classroom into a winter wonderland. The sight was beautiful and Kyungsoo realized why Mr. Yoon had gone through such trouble.

Ms. Lee always talked about how lucky the students were during the winter because they’d be able to go outside and play, while she’d be stuck at her desk grading papers. Everyone thought she was joking, but Kyungsoo had actually stayed after school one day and had seen how Ms. Lee had acted while walking in the snow, her usual jeans and flannel shirt covered up by thick outerwear that prevented her from walking properly. She had a weak body since she was young and never really could afford being sick as a teacher, so she’d have to be extra careful and throw away her own fun to enjoy time indoors with the students more.

Mr. Yoon knew this and just granted one of her most important wishes. The tears coming down were all pure and happy ones, the sight being so cute until a girl in back of Kyungsoo had shouted for them to kiss. It caused the other girls to start chanting too, and by the time Kyungsoo joined in, the two teachers were lip locked in the cutest scene he’s ever seen. It was cuter than anything he’s seen on TV, and this was when he was truly happy, and a bit shocked.

Looks like his rough ways were rubbing off on the girls in his class.

The months coming after that day were even better than the beginning of the year, which seemed pretty unbelievable since Kyungsoo was already having the time of his life from the first day. Having become one of the more popular kids in his course, the girls had flocked around him during their baking session during recess.

“Can I have a muffin when you’re done Kyungsoo?” One of the girls asked, poking Kyungsoo’s shoulder over and over again until he had answered.

“I already promised those with the best participation scores for this round of treats, sorry.” He said with a small frown.

It hadn’t taken that much willpower to make the girl feel bad, and she frantically said it was alright as long as he wasn’t upset, mentally telling herself to do better so she’d be able to eat some of the treats next time. That was the thing about Kyungsoo and he never really tried to discriminate against any of the girls. Whether they had gotten the lowest scores in the grade or how rich they were, none of that mattered for him as long as they took their classes seriously. To that, he’d reward them with baked goods and everyone loved Kyungsoo’s sweets, especially Mr. Yoon and Ms. Lee.

Or should he say, Mr. and Mrs. Yoon.

Smiling at the thought of their official marriage, Kyungsoo let the muffins cool outside before he smelled something foul from outside the hall, automatically causing him to grab the pan and place it on the opposite side of the room before going back to stand in front of all of the girls. They didn’t know why Kyungsoo was taking such a protective stance, but after the door opened, they knew why.

“Look! Girly Kyungsoo is wearing his girly apron and is cooking for the girls!” One of the boys teased, mouth spitting a little from the gap in his teeth.

“Girly Kyungsoo, give me a muffin too!” Another boy said, unaware of how Kyungsoo was leering down at each boy that stepped into the room.

The amount of stench coming into the room made the right decision for him to move everyone towards the other end of the class. He watched the boys come in closer before one had managed to climb over the table, his dirty shoes smearing across the white counter tops where Kyungsoo had just recently cleaned.

“Give me a muffin!” The boy said again, already trying to touch the muffins behind the group of girls.

Kyungsoo was too slow in stopping him, but it wasn’t needed since the girls all made a wall to protect Kyungsoo’s food.

“Get out of here, you stupid idiot!” One of the girls said, using her mixing spoon to swat away the boy’s hand.

“Yeah! Only good kids can eat Kyungsoo’s food!”

The boy had no interest in the girls and merely pushed them aside before heading to the pan of muffins. His grubby hands made contact with their nice clothes, and Kyungsoo watched as their white shirts turned brown from his hands.

He didn’t like when the boys treated the girls like nothing, and gently pulled the girls away so he wouldn’t touch them anymore, making a space between them though doing nothing more than that. The boy looked at Kyungsoo as he did nothing and shrugged, going for a muffin when he suddenly drew his hand back with a yelp.

“Girls, this is why you don’t touch hot metal without gloves.” Kyungsoo said with a bit of a sarcastic chuckle, showing everyone the oven mitts he had on in case they needed a visual reminder.

The boy that touched the hot pan merely looked at Kyungsoo with a heated stare, going up to him before swinging his arm to punch him. Kyungsoo wasn’t a fighter, but that didn’t mean he didn't know how to dodge, ducking down and placing the oven mitt on the boy’s face before pushing him back by his forehead. His stance wasn’t very solid, and the boy had fallen back onto his before he had begun to cry, ugly screams attracting attention of the other students and teachers.

“Serves you right for being mean to Kyungsoo!” The girls would shout, being joined in by some of the other girls that filled into the classroom to see what happened.

Eventually the teachers had come in to see what was wrong and Kyungsoo, along with the boy that tried to take his treats were taken to the principal’s office. Kyungsoo managed to serve out his muffins before he left though, complementing the girls that protected the muffins though he told them to be careful next time. Their willing nods and smiles were the reassurance he needed before leaving.

One way or another, his parents and the boy’s parents were called to school, meaning they all had a little sit down before they were released without a charge. Kyungsoo had been getting good at talking with people, so naturally, he had been able to calmly state what had happened in a manner that. The boy tried to protest, but even his parents were swayed by Kyungsoo’s way with words.

“So you’re saying my son tried to take the muffins on his own will?” The boy’s mother asked, once more for clarification.

“Yes and he laid his hands on the other female students, which is why I had pushed him back with the oven mitts.”

No surprise there since Kyungsoo’s repeated the story at least five times by now. The boy’s parents, along with the teachers were all intrigued by how maturely he spoke, finding it interesting to listen as he calmly assessed the situation.

After that, Kyungsoo was free to go home without getting in trouble whatsoever. The boy was too more or less, but that was only with the teachers and the school. His parents looked mad to say the least, while Kyungsoo’s parents, didn’t have much of a change.

During dinner, it had all happened so fast that even Kyungsoo was startled by such a quick change in events.

“You speak so good now for a boy your age Kyungsoo. That would be really great if you were to become a lawyer when you grew up!” His mother praised, though not in a way Kyungsoo liked.

“I guess, but I want to be a singer.” He muttered, voice being ignored by both of his parents.

“With an attitude like what you had in school, he could even be the next president.” His father chuckled, still, ignoring Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo grew tired of their squabble and slammed his utensils down on the table, successfully shutting them up before he left to go to his room for the night. He wasn’t hungry and gave up trying once his parents downright began to ignore him.

His mood was still a bit down when he returned to school the next day, and although the girls did their best to cheer him up, Kyungsoo couldn’t really find himself smiling happily as much as they were used to.

“He just needs a little time girls. Why don’t you make him some soup and I bet, he’ll feel better.” Mrs. Yoon said with a small smile, giving Kyungsoo the space he needed to cool down a bit. “Now kiddo, what’s wrong?”

She sat near him on one of the benches and Kyungsoo just sighed before explaining what was happening with his parents, trying his best not to let his inner feelings get into the explanation, though it was hard because all of his anger was directed mainly for that reason.

“But if you become a singer, that’ll show them.”

Kyungsoo grew wide eyed at his teacher for skipping so far ahead into the future, but still listened as she told him that life was about testing limits with people. He’d need to be more assertive in saying what he wanted or they wouldn’t know. Heck, he could even possibly scare them and pretend to run away from home. It worked for her when she was a kid and her parents let her do whatever she wanted after realizing that if she did what she loved, they too would be happy.

“But don’t run away though. I wouldn’t want my loved one running away from me like that.”

He turned to find another familiar face sitting on the other side of him, making him sandwiched in between two teachers. Mr. Yoon just smiled while affectionately tapping his wife on the shoulder, the two of them becoming lost in each others eyes as Kyungsoo just watched from below.

Call him a romantic guy, but he loved seeing their interactions just like this. How Mr. Yoon’s strict personality would crumble at a single look from his wife, and how Mrs. Yoon would always be smiling, her smile being especially bright when her husband came into view. He wanted to feel something like this, where he’d just be happy being with the person he loved.

He thought about his parents for a while before frowning again, finding himself pulling Mr. and Mrs. Yoon closer to him on the bench as he greedily took in their warmth. They didn’t seem to mind though and closed in on Kyungsoo, the three of them smiling from the close interaction before Mrs. Yoon had pulled out her phone to snap a few pictures.

“This way I can show you to our child as the best role model ever, when it happens of course.” She said with a silly grin.

Mrs. Yoon’s hair was slowly falling out from her bun the more she laughed, and Mr. Yoon just smiled at the sight, curling the loose hair behind her ear before the two of them broke out into a fit of giggles together.

Kyungsoo’s days were pretty similar to that day from then onwards. His relationship with his own parents would take a turn as his two teachers would comfort him during the day, giving him just enough energy to cheer back up to go play with the other kids before he had gone back home to repeat the cycle. He was growing tired of constantly having to remind his parents he wanted to be a singer, but if this was the only way he’d get them to believe him, they’d he’d keep doing it.

“We’re taking you out of course two.” Kyungsoo’s mother said one night during dinner.

Kyungsoo had been eagerly stuffing his mouth with his stomach rumbling from having to wait for his food to cool off. Once he had heard his mother speak, all of his appetite was gone again, just like it has been leaving for the past few weeks.

“What?”

His father nodded his head as Kyungsoo just sat bewildered by the the choice that was made for him without his knowledge.

“Course two was for girls anyways Kyungsoo, and you’re not doing any better staying in those classes.”

Kyungsoo couldn’t believe what he was hearing and just frowned as his parents continued to talk badly about his course. There were truly nice people in that course, and they were much better than the hooligans that hung out in course one.

“I’m not changing courses.” Kyungsoo said, leaving the dinner table just like every other night.

He hadn’t been able to sleep well that night, growing weary of what could happen behind his back now that his parents were being so hard to deal with. Sure enough when he had gotten to school, he found Mrs. Yoon with a familiar green slip in her hands, signaling the course change.

“I didn’t know you picked the wrong course Kyungsoo… I’m so sorry for making you-”

“Don’t be, because it’s what I wanted anyways.” He said with a sigh, looking at his crumpled paper. “My mom didn’t listen to me and just crossed out what I wanted to do, crazy right?”

The bent edges were rough against Kyungsoo’s fingers, and the boy could only keep his mouth shut once the tears began to fall. He wanted to cry, so badly, but he knew if he did then Mrs. Yoon would probably cry too.

“So what are you going to do Kyungsoo?” Mr. Yoon asked, trying to keep him level headed just as he had wanted.

Kyungsoo huffed before standing up from his desk. “I’m going to persuade them.”

“And if not?”

He took the time to look at his teachers one more time before giving a sad smile.

“Then I’m going to a place where I’m happiest.”

For some reason, Mr. And Mrs. Yoon look a little worried by his words, and Kyungsoo notices by the way they keep their eyes on him throughout most of the day.

The rest of the day consisted of Kyungsoo baking extra foods and goods for the girls of his class, in case today really was his last day. They didn’t suspect a thing and just took it as his good nature shining especially brightly today, munching away at the snacks happily as he continued to cook. When he had gotten home, it seemed like everything was more or settled at school, and all Kyungsoo had to do was make his parents realize where his true happiness resided.

“I’m staying in course two.” He said while smashing the meat on his plate.

Kyungsoo’s mother sighed before settling her utensils down, bringing her napkin up to to wipe the nonexistent food. “Well, I’m sorry honey, but this phase of yours needs to be curbed and it will. As long as you go and play with the boys your age and be normal.”

He felt almost offended by her words and snapped another comeback.

“It’s not a phase, it’s just something I like to do. Why are you going to ruin my happiness for it?”

“Because we care about you and want you to realize that not everything in life is what it seems to be.” His father said, not looking at him as he looked through the newspaper.

Kyungsoo didn’t understand. There were many things, though everything could be traced back to the two almost strangers sitting in front of him. Why he wasn’t able to cook and sing like the girls in his class, because he was a boy. And why his parents wouldn’t take their own damn advice and just pay attention to him once when he was practically begging for the attention himself.

“If you actually paid attention to me, you’d see that this is what I want to do!” He shouted angrily, standing up from his place at the table to see them both finally look at him for once. “Why can’t